Tom Green was at the party. Missed him cos after the mosh pit and beer all over me I had had enough. Then I destroyed some 7-11 nachos and cheese and taquitos WOOHOO! It’s hard not to drink when you have a free booze vip bracelet on.

UPDATE! Jenny Lewis quietly approves of Boylord!

Happy New year blah blah.

Thanks Tim! Tragedy is uploading now.

I’m a bloggy girl in a party world

So Tuesday nights are for CUBE-ing. Rooftop Partio fashion show, feel me now? I and my homies get to be the guests of (dis)honour cos my BE-F does the hair for the models. Sometimes they are boy, and sometimes they are girl models. Not many summer nights left so that’s where I’ll be erry Tuesday if you want to join in on the shenans and you’re in my crew, you let me know I ain’ts got time to track all your asses down. My nail run is pretty good btw. Hope I don’t jinx it.

Everyone loves my purse, I get bored of things quick so I’m always pleasantly surprised when it gets a compliment. Best 4 dollars ever spent.

Raymbecca is hanging with Craig now which is great because they are both the most stubborn people ever it makes full sense AND they are both close friends of mine PLUS I get to take credit for them meeting, dynamite boom you’re welcome. I told her we are in a couple’s-off cos she has all these dorky photos of Craig on her FB like him throwing a rock in to a lake at sunset agahahaha Me and Steve are fully gay so I don’t care how angery this post gets them.

I look like shit here he does not so I will be a nice homeboy and blog it anyway. I was MENSTRUATING through my goddamn face it looks like. I might draw a rabbit head over my head probably remind me. All I know is he is smoking hot and aww yeah buddy!

Dear Frankie, your lingerie is to die for. Get all over my body asap. Help me pick out some pieces Little Raymesies.

Wanted to take Booboodoodoo out on the town, fancy town. She’s a Rosedale girl anyway so these are her people. She delighted the entire rooftop we are very proud of her. She’s just our little Jules, she gets some good burns in on ol Auntie Raymbo though. Can you guys please flipping tell me what night to book off for her party so I can arrange a pisnatchio cheesecake pick-up too GOD HOLY HELL WHY DO I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING.

I was still in a bit of a pissed off mood from the day and my peer-E-ood. Some of the models had a bit too much of a cocky swagger, attitude, we could smell it to high hell.

Sweet bods though. Tone down the hot shit vibe please, that goes to everyone up there on that patio. Say it with me now: h-u-m-i-l-i-t-y.

That dress would look amazeballs on me. Bech and I tried to see between her legs when she was in this teeny thong but an annoying guy was right in our way blocking it, I have a video of Rebecca yelling at him I think. He never moved, was too drunk to hear us. We stand behind the couches and go through drank tix like cray VIPLEASE cool stories that we are.

Jules’ face matches my shirt. ADORABLAH! To be 20 (not for long sucka!)

Rebecca has to learn how to use my camera when we are up there and get a photo of me ALL OF ME. Maybe colleague wants to come some night?

Anyway until that day, bathroom pics it is. It really bothers me if I organize the night and I don’t get any nice pictures of myself. #DIVA.


Continue reading

The Adventures of Raymbecca

Hola muchachos! Lets try to figure out what I did last night, I like going through the carnage backwards, like a treasure hunt and almost as scary as Jumanji.

How to dress for a fashion show if you’re nervous about fashion shows (everyone is) and part of the show is the fashion on the floor. Waiting for the show is people watching city. I counter-balance my anxiety by dressing classic and understated, casual, comfortable and I kinda always have to go in sync with Raymbecca who is stubborn as a mule with her shit (always excruciatingly so it makes me go 1. bananas 2. hair loss 3. rage).

Anyway when you go out dressed like the underdog people get wicked intrigued by you quick so when you do something or say something classified as “neat” they are BLOWN AWAY BY YOU like the monkey is now TALKING.

I am so not falling for that one Raymbecca. Hmm, sniff. JUST JOSHING YOU.

Not to brag hag but all the gays loved us, me first. My ego was at an all time high. And you know what we did to make friends? Nothing. I mean, be ourselves (who does that??) This is not our first rodeo (what?) but I’ll give it to my famous hairstylist to grease the wheels for me before arrival by talking about me to everyone first thanks bro. The rest we did ourselves.

I really love this rooftop, it wasn’t as slammed as a couple fashion show nights ago but it was busy enough, with room to enjoy yourself, dig? There is always one requisite cluster of annoying “too good for everyone fashionistas”, Cube never disappoints. Too bad they were trashy and fug. They are rude and they storm you, I wouldn’t move out of the way of one because it was the third time they clothes-lined our crew, such bratty poorly brought up manner-less women beasts trying to gain alpha club status like there is nowhere else to go up here, you are here, stop pacing. No one is better than anybody else up there as far as I’m concerned but it’s fun to watch some try to be.

One of our twenty new gay best friends hahaha.

I don’t think you want to know what I asked about that ring. His friend exploded in to laughter and said, “yes basically!” Lolz. Raymbecca had a blast last night my brain marbles are still blasted out of my head for it.

Danier jackets. Some super amazing ones. I’d love a new jacket for fall and keep my little beater one for when I go to Salvador Darling. Where everyone loses jackets.

Cute. Next time I am going to eat a bag of popcorn and lay on a couch because “I’m media”.

It’s like The Ring.


Fancy nails. Upped my game and worth just from slicking it on. I want to wear my monokini today lol. I’ll save it for the island. Who saves things? Burn those fancy candles now! Oprah says. I apply that to everything.

Ooh ma nails. Can you have a crush on yourself?

Look it’s the Three Muskecheers. I wonder where le f the Killigrew boys were?

One day Raymbecca will dance on the catwalk after the show and it will be hilarious.

It was nice being told all night long how beautiful I was “like model”. Like, how tanked are you guys? They turned my blahh-zay attitude right around. My understated slob sailor outfit was a success.

I almost wore my ghettofab wedges but I didn’t think that would be safe to bike in who am I the Spice Girls now? (yes) but anyway you know these mary jane wedges have been kickin’ it with me for years now (can you remember how many?) they’re uber comfortable to deal with, albeit borderline geriatric. How many shits I give can also be applied to my dance moves.


I styled the rest of Bech‘s outfit, just popped that necklace on and voila. Sold.

Nice pipes!

Oh summer nights. Quit smoking it’s grosstastic! Looks good in my pictures though.

That is the world’s most intense cigarette drag.

It’s nice and toasty up there it’s like the roof was ripped off to make way for the gotham view. It really puts me in a good mood.

Lets have a nice sit. Can you tell I put gold glimmer everywhere on my eyes?

Too bad my eyes are different colours. I pulled a Bowie. This is essentially just another It’s Pat! outfit.

Then we rode bikes home and massacred a chicken carcass with tipsy jerk sauce all over it and drank my VIP bottle of Absolut Elyx. And that my friends is what we call Tuesday night. Til next time.


What do we do when we fall off the horse?

We get back on, Little Raymis, we get back on.

Ready for round II? Ah duh.

Hi Lena!

The penguins would make little runs for it it was so funny and cute, they’d puff up their chests and flap wings and SCRAM then the girls would have to scoot them back in again. We were so close we could have touched one but we’d get pecked potentially which one girl did much to our amusement lol.

I went from crying to laughing in seconds. Normally a sign of hysteria or any form of crazy but I was at a zoo extreme emotion boomerangs happen here. Animals in captivity (usually injured so it’s a sanctuary of sorts), new ones being born, winemotional. To recapyou though, Lady Garbage was put down this day + a dude ran in to me with wine glasses after a downpour (thunder and lightning scare me & rain PISSES ME OFF! If I have to be out in it)(Plus I am still sick and was at the time) are these enough reasons for crying yet? Thank you.

The universal cat call known as pss pss pss worked like a c harm we had thing thing near us in seconds. You should have seen Bech get an Eagle to squak at her to STFU! cos of her voice and annoying talking at it bahaha ps. check out her tumblr I updated like a crazyiac last night. It’s fun currating other people’s images and putting the best-ofs together or whatever. I am the shittiest best friend ever!

AW I LOVE IT I WANT IT EXPLOSION!!!! Also I am pretty. Shut up don’t tell anyone you’re making me blush.

So close. Bech looks like a 7 year old that is what I love about her.

I just said Aw Booboodoodoo out loud. If you can tell me where that term originates from I will blow a fart on your tum tum. Mom no telling.

Two of them!


It was ridinkulous. We were on our way to the stingrays and I was like whaaaaaat!

Yes that is actually what I was like. That is a thing now. I hope I get on Letterman before he retires so I can be a total asshole to him back. I don’t like how he is unraveling and being a POS (piece of sh-) to guests like a drunk prick uncle. You adapt to society, do not expect it to adapt to you. Remember that everyone.

HAhaah lovely. You can’t bring your wine in so we chug them and then go drunk in to the stingrays it is a ball of a time.

She’s all we wouldn’t let you go very far with them and I said you couldn’t catch me anyway hey colleague check out her foot! HAPPY BIRTHDAY COLLEAGUE B T W! The ghost with the most! LOL ((((colleague)))) o_O :) Now tune-up ma bike we got stuffs ta do tomorrow.

Wash your hands so we don’t get our dirty hands all over the stingrays.

Doing the same last year.

Rebecca is MAJORLY focusing.

And last year.

We went right to work.

We’re like one of those movies based on people who work at sea world having adventures and romances and heartbreak and valuable life lessons I get to be Adam Sandler called it.

We are whispering bad girl things and daring each other to be tough guys.

Here I am bragging about this being my THIRD year in a row petting these freaky alien sharks and bein’ straight ballin’ gangster god how annoying I am sorry Rebecca (NOT).

Ya gotta get right on in there. Now why was I getting stink eye again lol. Like I care.

We were already damp, moist, and/or soaked from the downpour so what did it matter anymore? There was one particular stingraymi™ that was a punk dick! It splashed me big time, lots of people, but it was being playful really I felt cos it kept coming back for more. Some will come up for a pet they like it.

This is the one (what kind of shark is it?) that we held on to that was pretty ballsy what if it turned around and bit us? I would if some stupid girls were holding me like a snake. Raymbecca does as Raymbecca pleases.

See? she did it first I had to stop her because I have maternal instincts whilst Bech’s snake-charming ones kicked in to overdrive HAHAHA fantastic.

I am so dramatic. I was destined to be a gay icon. #truth.

Thanks a lot Raymbecca.

Oh my god seriously?

Do you come in large?

I would not quit until I held this one.

Lots of them in this area, they circle the entire pool but the meat of them are all here it’s like petting central.

Careful we’re about to get creeped.

Colleague liked this one most of all haha lawda mercy!


It was a juicy day in the Raymbohood. Atin’ and drankin’

That’s Raymbecca as sharks.

Time to dry off.

Love my neon nails.

Flirty nearing thirty.

Wiping the moisture from my stupid phone camera lens.


Continue reading

Team Yay Cray > Parkdale Boys Club

Stupid is served.

Party aerobics crombie & fitch.

Sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your name & they’re always glad you came!

Super Moon. Okay we get it.

Same cycles, same moods, same outfits, same tudes.

At one point Salvador Darling was not packed and then instantly it was slammed. Had I gone out in my harajuku fleece I’d have vommed all over myself from the heat. Thank god for the teeny window in our VIPLEASE (heheh) booth Darius cranked open.

Cool setting HEY we instagrammed it ghetto digital camera style. Hi Jenna!!

I can fold this shirt up in to a teeny tiny square and jam it in my purse, which is what I did, several times. It’s hot, I’m cold, and so on.

Working my way up to smiling.

Greased up my hair a lot with moroccan oil the night before (way too much thanks REBECCA) so it looked a bit like that, I didn’t want it to be dried out from the hair dye, I only left it on for fifteen minutes they say that in dye boxes to grey haired chicks and blonds, the platinum was just waiting ready and willing to absorb the colour instantly. I feel like blond never even happened I am so accustom to seeing myself dark. This will grow interestingly. Raymi is transforming! I’m also whitening my teeth with guards for 7 days for 30 minutes (that’s what the directions say) AND now my skin is major tanned from the sunny w/e, it’s gonna be a sweet new look and life this summer.

It was Derek’s house warming party but by the time I left the house (I was this close to staying in very tired) it had moved to the bar it wasn’t even eleven yet and they had already peaced out cos Derek was licked. Easier for me than cabbing so we all just met there yay fun plan.

Jonathan was a piece of shit all night long. You know you were. Here are your top ten hits: Calling me a vain bitch, braggarting about being a doctor, telling me I never used the word vortex before condescendingly, snapping at me for interrupting you to deliver a message from Darius across the table being a double bonus diss as the message was juicy and to your benefit. Other than that super neat love and hatey kinda dude, can say I definitely relate. Couple other dumb things too but that’s private so can’t wait to see you again.

All the Pdale boys club crew were out and in full effect. Rob showed up later. Derek did not make it out too bad.

Saw on twitter that Darius is 32 now what I met you when you were 30.

Oh hi. Cool scarf bro wrap it again. This almost made the blog post title cut.

This is what my reaction to being called a vain bitch by a twitty little man looks like. Gloves were off at that point. I am fascinated by rude people, their audacity and nerve. We also enjoyed watching him strike out with other women, cool approach bro. When people turn when they party or turn on you, It’s belligeration town population them. He was quite lovely the first time I met him at Darius’ then remembered who I was what the hair change, bah who cares I’m not even mad you’re just getting a sobriety lesson hall of fame featurette the next day. Jenna said she told him she was going to punch him in the balls multiple times too so there you go haha.

The family camera was being funny so I didn’t get him dancing on there in time. The tunes were great motown classics of all sorts, some mod, everything, very fun dance times. I have the idea for a tumblr or art bar fly project called (which is available I just checked) of sitting in a booth all night long and the people are the only things moving in the bar all night long and you just party sitting in one spot then you film this in every bar club restaurant and have hundreds of them on your website showing the events of an entire night happening cray all around you okay you get it now right? There. Have fun.

Sick jacket I bet she listens to Katrina and the waves.


SUPER MOON IS FOLLOWING ME. Thanks to the Super moon it was the first time I ever knew there was a window in that corner.

Noticing red everywhere now. You only pay attention to shit when it pertains to you.

Nice setting. But even blurry you can distinctly tell that I DO indeed “have a torso” whiner little Raymi hater just won’t go away. I love you too!

Almost there so close.

This is also a fat day. Well, I ate all day and I am still pretty sleek. You’re so gross about women’s bodies, it’s sad and I do not believe you even have a real life friend with that f-ing attitude of yours.

Turn the heat down, I saw it at 76 ahhh O_O. Hi Tanya!

Open that shit!

I like that we can stare at all the bar patrons from the darkness of the back corner and see them comb the blackness trying to see our faces back.

We played musical booth chairs all night and effectively shunned anyone else for deigning to join us or put their jackets on our spot. Every regular seen here and in other shots have lost a jacket to SD so don’t feel so bad Jules. I am just wiping my brow with relief I got mine back and now I will only go there dressed in garbage in case I lose it. Hahha. I just brought a grey AA hoodie.

Pretty much, right? Nipples NSFW loophole.

I drink a lot of water when I jammer jam cos I am smart.

To be fair he is recently single and just came back from Scotland I guess. The ex seemed a bit, angry? Greener pastures bro we got you!

But next time I will totally push you in to a garbage can okay?

What is your favourite thing happening here? That epic hug or the girl’s face?

Hi Dave! Hi Lela!

Rocky time.


Can’t wait to wash my hair today.

Team Yay Cray > Parkdale Boys Club. I am still the founding father president and member of the PBC BTW.

We were very nice hostesses, some of the guys thought it was MY apartment oh brother ahahaha point received.

There’s the man. He was delayed hanging with Derek, maybe tucking him in to bed.

Rob big brothers me. He was shocked and awed by beasties memorization cos I’m so wee. That’s nice if people see me as a little kid I think, I’ll take that!

Requisite girl blob shot.

Nice treasure trail Rob! No really, girls like that!

These are all dance moves. Nice laser beam head Darius.

Dance face! Busted me!

Second male team yay cray inductee.

Tubular! Omg remember what happened to Rob’s scarf ahahahha agh. Great times.

I’m going to dig the wax out with a knife after I hit publish.

This shirt is getting worn. Bought it in thunder Bay from that hippie store while we killed time for our flight.

Love my polish and birds.

Doing toenails yellow later sometime. Okay that’s a wrap. I’ll post Friday night’s BS later on. Cray o lay o lay o lay O LAY! Happy ME Monday.

Thank you for getting high with us

Now here’s the second part to the Las Vegas style shit show we put together for the Android TO after party. Killed it.

Omg so scary and not even halloween yet!

Oh hey Paul. We are old friends. Once in awhile I bump in to him when we’re both on Nicolas Cage benders and it is funny.

Come come the more the merrier the less the scarier. One of my Raymisms. I have a lot. Michael Holett DM’d me and said, if you made up barflyentele, that is genius.

Ew gross not sexy. I look like a snausage. I bought those when I WAS a snausage actually, years ago. Never wore them. They’re so obvious.

So, once upon a time I had this idea for a burlesque troupe…

And you betcha there were haters but I kept at it and at it and that little division of my Raymi Circus is thrivin’, oh yes. I love all my girls.

I said to one group of boys that their flights had all been cancelled and they were permanently grounded, WITH ME. One licked his lips. Heh. I love being Raymi the Minx.

I wish I knew the thank you for getting high with us slogan as I’d have been saying that all night long. So much was going on I’m lucky I didn’t lose my hat.

I have really long arms.

What’s going on here what’s the big idea hey hey!

Impressive, though I might need a second look.

Not all of us are coming back.

Is that peach underwear?

Got tired of walking.

I wonder what they’re thinking, playing it cool while they feel my entire ass up.

Never fear Batman is here!

Yeah pretty much party stripper party awesome! Proud of it. Takes balls. I have them, do you? Two days later I leaned over the edge of the CN Tower. That’s Little Raymi #1 there.

Minx would look wicked on my arm in this right. Damnit.

I look like one of my childhood best friends when I show my brother and tell him he will die. Laughing. I was so retarded here I couldn’t figure out this was Alkarim.

And why I am saluting Hitler, ehhhh. I am actually waving What a power couple no?

Ha so confusing. Nice one Sean.

The other party room. Hot asian gamer chick.

We had a fake fight.

Pfft yeah.

Doin’ more of the thing.

This way no this way.

Bunny’s face should be on a toothpaste box so perfectly classic pleasantville apple pie right and I didn’t wash my hair what is it doing??? So puffy and stringy.

Aw I love him he always makes me laugh. Whether it be this or playing the keyboard with bubble wrap on his head stuffed in a Knight helmet.

Zaira’s big cans and ANDY MILONAKIS.

Gee I wonder which guys in this picture were on shrooms, the big mascot heads?

Do you think I was playing it cool enough?

Jazmin was their favourite.

I am talking all street here I think he bought it. Sean told him I was crazy though, thank you Sean! Holy smokes you should read some of the email chain between me and Sean over the last month planning this party ha ha.

Oh yeah some shit went down in the social media hood this night. It involves your hero. I don’t think that is what I am talking about here though despite my most amazing of facial expressions.

Thank you Celina for getting the roller lesbian punk babes together for this and fielding all that drama holy crap everywhere there be drama us burlesque misfits had some ourselves. Makes life exciting don’t it?

You know what’s sad and funny is, I actually look older than Andy Milonakis. I am going to go kill myself now kay thanks bye he’s 36!

Those sex costumes make your arms look humongous. And your face like Tara Reid. Enjoy! Some girl added me on FB who is a famous dominatrix and she has the same flight suit, weird right? That’s why she added me I think. I dunno, you never know when you are on the internet right? Scary place.

I am forcing him to kiss me here and he is playing funny guy. I think he thinks I was just trying to use him for his celebrity or something (totally was).

I can tell he liked it. Facebook liked it.

Then he started being nice and telling me stuff about crap that us performer guys talk about involving hotels and all that star treatment and Jazmin’s boobs probably.

OH how nice for me, a zit on game day!

And last one.

Everyone had costume changes it was the greatest thing. Loved curly ginger haired Harry Potter kid. That stage was bouncing and tunes were blasting I was blasted ahhh life.

Party shots! Hi Sean!

Anyone could get up in there and slam dance. Stephen did, that’s when we met I was drunk sitting on my luggage cross legged like a lady and he was piss wasted and some other little raymis were gathered and we fell in partying socialite love. Wicked dude! he goes, and I’m not even attracted to you, you’re not my type hahaha. More perfect. he’s the one I went to Thompson underground with and partied even dirtier with Pauly Shore.

Well wouldn’t ya know it’s all over.


Don’t remember if I blogged these of Erica’s. I feel like I did.

i think so?

Deleted last night’s post. Liked the photos still.

Love Wills Landing. VIPLEASE treatment pleases meh.

Guys tell me why I am interesting please I have to make an audition video one where I’m not david Hasselhoffing and shoving chicken wings in my mouth.

I always fly Harth Air

We have roller girls on the bill now too. Check out Jazmin’s Solo from our last gig at The Bovine.



We do weddings. You’d be surprised how many receptions request live entertainment now, and in front of the kids too, so exotic and progressive.

Bunny and I danced together with the Harlettes. yes that is similar to Harth Airlettes. The Harth boys are to blame, coincidentalish name, so we’re called harth air (air is sharper than airway) and I had to add something dancey to it so you’d know we were flight attendants. If you had a better idea than “lettes” you should have spoken up.

Maybe I can fly Harth to Germany cos I’m big in Düsseldorf! look!


I’m Robin from Germany.

A few friends of mine and me are running a Hardcore music print fanzine. The main content is hardcore related but we even have metal, emo(core), a bit rock and other stuff. Besides this we are reporting about environmental topics and lifestyle.

We even have a huge online community and seperated mens only and girls only.
In the girls only area your blog has been linked from time to time.

So I thought, why not to do an Interview with you.
I don’t really have a script right now, but I think it might be interesting for some of the people down here about how your blog went that big and especially the person behind all this.

if you like that Idea. please hit me back


Robin Outspoken

Düsseldorf in Germany


I Have been dying of curiosity about what they are all saying about me over on that forum, getting traffic to tumblr and like bananas. Guten Tag! Can’t wait!

Wonder if my Gulag had anything to do with it too. I’ll blog a video of Jasmine Valentine’s burlesque performance from SO LONG SUMMER up here in a moment along with more photos of the HARTH HIVE. Sean said they spoke to ANDY MILONAKIS for twenty minutes yesterday and I can’t spoil anything else. I can’t believe this is happening. I am going to take the boys to yuk yuk’s next week for a night out VIP RAYMI style. I must convince Alkarim to allow me to groom/exploit him more, he’s our Jeff Goldblum! The entire Harth cast of characters are a dream. What’s next, toadstool hallucinogens with Joe Rogan? PROBABLY!


He was so my muse, so playing to my little weird headwreath.

Full Penny Lane now.

Australian too. They’re freaks. Just you and me and Crocodile Dundee.

Total genius.

VIP is the place to be. Everybody watches you and thinks you’re someone and you dress like a someone anyway and encourage that notion. Dancing with other bandaids/ Miami Horror. PARTY.

And who the f- is Raimi? I dunno but I got her drank tix whatsup!

And then I get hit on.

The moment it went down. I liked his accent. Teacher got jeals. Sheldon is posing like raymi. Shawny and his date plus Stew, the total crew.


I might have an art show about post show beer can piles.

Live shows make me feel alive. It’s going to be a long winter.

This was like rubbing stardust onto my goddamn eyeballs I basically partied with mickey mouse fantasia and you didn’t. Tran and ginger and I have been reply all emailing each other hilarious ridiculous shit all day long and that’s why this post is delayed (plus I was doing a proposal).

Look at him in that hair shirt thing over there. I almost wore the bear coat but was like NO, people will make fun of me LOL then we see a live sushi fish head gymnastical affair.

Everyone in the audience was laughing dancing loving it such a great vibe, thrill, rush.

Weirder and weirder kept happening.

Those girl dancers have couture white fluffy tutu for a shirt and golden crystal full body faces (ballaclavas) it was bananas. See.

Hey I like your hat.

We danced together, I know weird right? It happened.

Dude, your starfish looks like a 420 rally hat.

Omg and this was amazing too.

I could do this I could do this! I want to tour sign up!

It had elements of the fpp too. Black lights, people as that big ghost ghoul goblin ahh so much, something Katamari Damacy-ish too Hahah how lost are you right now Dad?

Roman hats are also hot. I need to buy an actual tickle trunk.

I was front row centre for a live King Kong sacrifice, man behind the curtain at the emerald city and LOST. I was thrown into the sparkle cyclone and a Unicorn was kicked up my nose with rainbows flying out like boogers.

It was hysterical. Who wants to come to the next big weird thing like this? Stew and I were like, to hell with moping at Mitzi’s any night of the week we can just take a cab to the cirque du soleil gratis and be kings up in vip. Then we can roll out our new Raymi as Nardwuar TV SHOW.

Raider’s of the Lost Ark. I can speed reference every single influence to this Masterpiece theatre.

And then the show ends with requisite almost famous penny lane moment. I’ve toured before, have you?

Total girl p0rn.

Uh maybe another night. I’m not thin enough for a crop.

I noticed a few Third Reichy Connotations too. Dictatorships are so hot right now, well in theatre, music, performances. Deities are on pedestals for reasons yeah? What the hell do you think I am sitting on as I type this to you haha.

Writers are personal Gods anyway, they lead monastic lives. I read this.

The new thing is 40 things going on at the same time. Brilliant.

When the flashing strobe light subsided for a second I noticed there was hair EVERYWHERE!

If my brother were here he’d go, “those are dancing Laurens.” to burn me cos of my big nose hahah a-hole.

This is Third Reich to me. I want to build a podium for my next Gulag dance.

Also look what I just found.

So weird.

That scary ghost thing loomed into the crowd then floated away when a person put it on. It was like puppeteer stuff.

Gorgeous crazy fashion. Futuristic. I want to wear a Yak too!

He danced with his fans.

There’s the money shot.

Princess Maid Marion Carnage.

Then more on the homefront.

Diet Coke night.

Jerk Nachos. Melted Brie and smoked gouda, green salsa and siracha.

Teddy Bear picnic-sized. I am going to dance with Goldilocks. HOT right?

I look like I got punched in the eye. Stew said this looked good but that was at 3 in the morning so haha meh.

You look like the bad kid from a Christmas story. That was on my nipple. I should give it to Rob.

We made the wine rack by seconds and I had to go pee so bad. We had an amazing cab driver.

The big clock is so we know when to kick people the hell out. Windows work too.

And these dopes crash on it. I mean, when they’re not too busy puking, crapping with the dog. I just dry-heaved.

OH LOOK! I have decided to crowd surf, cross-dress, french kiss crowd surfers, mosh, take my kurt clothes off down to my skimpy anarchy bikini all while belting smells like teen spirit out at least 5 times in a row. F- UP will be there, Tokyo Police Club! and other notables, its made Pitchfork Media. I got to it first! Come experience this during Nuit Blanche it’s the 20 year anniversary for Nevermind. I will be rick rolling everyone from my neighbourhood/school/life. Last year I went as Courtney for Halloween, I do Kurt better. I’ll wear my docs for protection, high-end chic plaid shirt with cut offs. Maybe a dumpy lingerie negligee. Hair is perfect already.

I am going to full body performance art recreate this. It’s the moment I have played over and over in my head as an Emo little teenager. I bought every Nirvana cassette with garage sale money. People made a rumour that I smoked weed in grade 7 cos I smoked cigarettes (i was uber cool) and carried out grunge to a tee and I still became Valedictorian of that school. Born Leader.