they didn’t have the classic wallabees in the colour i wanted or the size so i got desert treck.

on our way to queen street we saw seven little dogs partying and i asked what was going on, no one knew. more pictures of it later.

tetris. the yellow one had a pocket stereo blaring the tetris song.

christie’s friends hate me cos we tom cruised her (get it katie holmes scientology shut up) well her gentleman caller friend hates me strongly prolly cos i am more alpha male than he is.

that’s fucking stupid.

christie collects these, they were doubles so she gave them to me, way to drop ten bucks for nothing!

why is there a ghost behind her?

so i bought her a matching dress as me to make up for the smoking labbits and to make her friends likehate me more.

50% off, ten bucks each & only a teensy slice of crazy to boot!

Ryan: any more spazzing to do on yr blog or am i good

me: well you said incite and i said entice
why dont you interview me

Ryan: whoa dyslexia
ok hang on let me get my notes together.

me: ha

Ryan: Russell. It takes a sad story to write a sad song. Do you have to have a good life to have a good blog?

me: HA

im a sad guy and kind of in love with it, mostly annoyed, but now ive come to terms with it, i accept it for what it is and i don’t need medication – people are drawn to sadness, there must be an element of tragedy in order for us to care for more than 15 minutes

Ryan: By now you must feel that you’re well past the sixteenth minute with what you’ve done with your blog – what do you see in its future? Any foreseeable outcome?
(take your time, or just say next)

me: i dont feel that way at all
(sorry fonecall)
it takes ten years to be an overnite success and this is my “career” – so everyday what i do is my job right, just as everyday some banker does their job, but is that banker thinking oh my 15 minutes are almost up i better get on this before people dont care about my mutual funds anymore? i have the benefit of being a lazy man’s celebrity – they don’t want me to get too big, but some do so i don’t quite get what people are implying or trying to say to me when they say shit like that, like shut up what the hell are you trying to achieve

Ryan: I do – you raise allusion to Andy Warhol – do you feel that your expression is rooted in finding art in the mundane, that your beer can chicken is his campbell’s soup can – or are you afraid of becoming too close to or detached from your audience?

me: re-word this question so that it is actually answerable

Ryan: good call
just tryin to give talking points
Who are your primary inspirations, if any?

me: being detached or attached to an audience has nothing to do with creating art
im inspird by people i know, conversations, movies, the melancholy, books – any thing or one person that has inspired me happened years ago, now it’s simpler things that encourage me, music helps

Ryan: Great songs have been written on napkins. Do you ever get an idea for a post at common places like a restaurant?

me: all the time but you have to write those down, because you DO forget them and will, living in toronto is inspiring, living in smaller towns also is inspiring cos you are like i want to get out of this small town and be bigger than it. the “i’ll show them” factor but then some dickhead invents facebook and then all the people you never spoke to are in your inbox like what is raymi who is this raymi slghporegtqyrotyreovifdjlvnjrewoig nrogre

Ryan: Do you see yourself and your setting as interrelated, as say Hemingway in Cuba or Stephen King in Maine?

me: for now
but i’d like to be a crazy lady with long hair and wellingtons in some remote village in ireland or wherever quaint stories come from
the thing that motivates me is pictures in my head, something you see in a movie or conjure up from a book, then i go out and do it
right now it’s barfly and music
though it should be something more

Ryan: To entertain a dickhead from facebook, for our readers, who is this Raymi? Where did the inspiration for the name come, is it an exotic alterego, did you want the Pink Floyd fans to sit around wondering what it stood for?

me: i was 14, i had been hanging out with my cousin and brother, my cousin (kerouac side) was in a weird phase, where he was like, i am weird, anyway, i read some of his pen and paper ramblings, we were all very into nirvana at the time, and inspired by his dirty basement bedroom and filthy clothes i wrote a two page story beginner called the last minx, written from the perspective of a girl in an asylum

and i sat there in my suburban mississauga livingroom staring at the christmas tree, the complete opposite of what i was writing about, i was a pretty depressed kid but hid it well, anyway, the girl needed a name and my own name was not interesting enough, and raymi just came to me, from nothing, it was the perfect name then i expanded that into a longer story, i thought i would be a published author by the age of 16

arrogant little fuck

Ryan: Does it inspire you to wonder what that story could someday be worth?

me: anyway that story sucked, i have it typed out somewhere and on floppy
well it became a self-fulfilling prophecy
the crazy ward part
i wrote it before girl interrupted
and i thought i was really fucking savvy
the premise i thought was groundbreaking
anyway, asylums are not glamorous at all, there’s no fucking ballet lessons with angelina hipster jolie

Ryan: And she doesn’t get topless either? There still is a certain mystique and bullshit glamour about the crazy artist

me: oh there always will be

Ryan: Do you need to be crazy to have a crazy blog?

me: the candle burns brightest before it flickers out right
when you’re mad you are at your skinniest and you become looks-obsessed
so there are crazy outfits and hairstyles
in that respect it can be quite hollywood
re: crazy blog, uh, what do you think

Ryan: off the record yeah or maybe just bored or happy

me: off the record?

Ryan: tryin to be pro and have a continuity to the interview
minimal editing, larry king said it’s not suppose to be about the interviewer

me: im looking at papers i wrote when i was in the psyche ward
im adding them to my book
also a journal i kept
and things i wrote and havent read since highschool
i was a little more eloquent back then

Ryan: simpson gene i have it too, you get dumber when you get older

me: you drink more

Ryan: maybe you just attempt and attain less
yeah that too
let’s end this interview:

me: well you afford yourself the luxury of lazy by working harder in the beginning, building the “fanbase”

Ryan: well sometimes anything anyone touches becomes gold too,artists like picasso could make it look cool irrespective of the perceived worth of what it was he was looking at

me: what is the question

Ryan: so you with your writing voice sharpened and always-on could look at a beer can in a chicken’s ass is that fair to say?
nm that a wrapup question

me: i suppose, i notice things in the real world and it’s obvs that people on the internet should share in it, blogging is storytelling and some people like picture books

Ryan: Yours seems to be a success story; shows people what’s possible – are you inspired by the amount of blogs that, via sidebar or otherwise, you’re a precursor to? Do you even have time to read them all?

me: i read blogs sure, theyre all good, save for the crazy ones, cos after awhile even your fans turn on you and forget that you inspired them
i just keep on doing what i do

i just cleared every red hot chili peppers and mr. bungle song off of my itunes and it felt pretty fucking good.

fil said you aren’t allowed to see what he wrote.


fil made a cute post.

i just rage cleaned the bathroom while listening to fil on the phone with apple for an hour, there are makeup sharpie stains on the bathroom counter, one of the mg passes with sharpie on it upside down on the counter with water made it stained, colour me livid. i went for a tan and bought new goggles so i can do stand-up tanning and not have to squint my eyes tightly or buy those stupid eye stickers. lots of university students use our visitor parking lot to smoke weed in or pee on the bushes or idle their cars and drink coke and captain morgans and hock loogies real loud me and fil and cid are the neighbourhood watch and stare at them menacingly in secret EXCUSE ME IT IS SOBER NITE DAY 2 DON’T MAKE ME FUCKING KILL YOU! oh wait fil just corrected me on something two posts down brb fellers.

ok i’m back.

evan almighty is the worst movie to watch when you are on a sober nite, unless of course you enjoy feeling angry like the incredible hulk, you think you are signing up for a nice jokey time, but what you are really signing up for is RAGE.

if you are going to have a sober film nite you have to watch something depressing, as we did after with a mighty heart. angelina jolie’s accent is really good and the story is chokingly painfully sad and well gosh gee sigh.

sorry dudes but this guy would be on suicide watch if something like that happened to me, no matter how awesome my hair was.

i don’t even want to talk about it anymore.

tomorrow is fil and i’s third year anniversary oh hai. we bought each other cards and pretended to not be looking at shopper’s today then had to stand in line beside each other to pay and he used my shopper’s optiumum card, after our pizza lunch date of course.

there was a crazy lady in the bank and this white banker dude came out and bellowed what’s going on i cannot hear i am on the fuh-own then he saw her with her walker and fucked up legs and felt like a shmuck, rightly so. it was good banking-timing on fil’s part. tomorrow we are going on a clarke’s date we’ll see if i cave and get him a pair too why can’t he just be normal and want a nerf football or something?

christie may have a few extra or less marbles, can’t say for sure yet, either way it’s pretty awesome. she just pointed out that we HAVE TAILS! we have a buzzer now! w/o needing a landline! HELLO 2007!

deleting all of your pictures kind of kills your blogging mojo for a second, oh well, here this is me just after i realised i deleted everything.

oh well, good thing my goal in life is to be as apathetic as possible when things go wrong fuck it dude lets go bowling.

and then on this corner just as some guy turned to look at me (as my presence sometimes is pretty electric) i growled FUCK when we made eye contact then i crossed and got a sub this is a fascinating story.

fil was eating his falafel the whole time and that’s future’s bakery i like to make fun of.

which reminds me last nite before i fell asleep listening to a biography about vlad and dracula i finally figured out the title of my next book i am not telling you what it is though only fil.

this is what we did all day yesterday and all day today fil is babysitting the security channel for a package from purolater, it’s making him crabby.

we don’t have a landline, so no buzzer.

we went out to rent movies and for fil to eat a falafel from ghazale and i deleted all of my pictures accidentally from dinner with tony NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! i’m pretty bummed. i ate the sub of the day from subway, subway club, and i bought some miso packets and pepper brie from dominion. we are going to watch evan almighty then a mighty heart go sober nite go go go! fil lost his bank card. we did laundry. i am sad because i wore a stupid hat last nite and took pictures of myself and i looked cute and i wanted you to see awwwwwww. ungh fuck flickr everything is invisible right now anyway alright that just put me over the edge fuck the internet. oh wait i got dadfil to fix it. i’m still angry. time for a g rated film bye.