Raymbo Pride

Okay time to practice with these more. I’m only going to use 2 rods cos it will be lighter and I don’t need four, it’s impossible and no way the wing can flutter if a rod is in it plus I don’t want to poke anyone and there is a higher chance of that with 4. So catch us on Shasha’s float tomorrow, starts at 2pm. PUMPED. We have a hose to spray you down with if you get overheated and it’s infused with vanilla so smell like a bakery. GENIUS. It’s also time for a shower. Make sure to never leave a pet or a baby in a hot car when it’s like this okay thank you xoxo Raymbo :).

“Celebrate & Demonstrate! Voted Best Float @PrideToronto look for us at ‪#pride2012‬ on Sun. July 1″


I went to a party here years and years ago I never forgot it except I can’t remember which house it was exactly hehheh..

So I’m very fond of this bizarre corner. Biking through it at night, a hot summer one. 19 years old. Stupid and spectacular.

It was an out of the way place to party at the time.

TV pancake makeup.

Soccer traffic. Spain won.

I have papillon hair. I am down with that.

Game face on. Remember when I never smiled. I need to start up @raymisemo again haha. Maybe when goth has a revival, Emo will come shortly thereafter.

I like the vintage posters at legendary MTV studioland. We were sequestered in this room upstairs so as to keep us away from the finalists. We were loud as hell, it felt like highschool again and it was super fun. Give us vegetables and water and see what happens I guess.

Buh buh bam you betcha.

Beside me is a frickin’ ice cream fridge STOCKED. We were not allowed that either.

You can see part of my question haha.

Everything is working here ooh yes snaps.

Smell ya later Happy Saturday.

Crowd surf fail

Oh hi there just calling to say hi. I am not a phone person, I am a text person. I do not enjoy speaking on the phone. I see it as a waste of my time. Once in awhile I love a good chat but mostly I like to just sit in silence alone all day long hunched over my laptop. Sir Hunch-a-lot. So, if I do call you it’s because I think I am in trouble or I am fighting with you and have too many things to type about how much you have offended/annoyed me. I disperse my gossip evenly throughout my top five texters but sometimes it’s good to just have radio silence and cut your secrets in half, like maybe I shouldn’t say that one part, yeah, I’ll sleep better.

See how he just gets dumped down like that, you gotta be quicker bro. Some randoms were like are you going to crowd surf? Uh, no. One doesn’t leave the house thinking am I going to crowd surf tonight? baha I’d love to be the kind of person though where that would be a possibility. I am not going to have kids until I fucking crowdsurf goddammit. Summer bucket list. I crowd surfed at Metallica when I was 15 and it took me practically the entire show to get the balls to do it. But then I did it twice. And then I learned what happens to chicks who crowdsurf. Disgusting gropetastical city. Then I was young and naive so I didn’t enjoy it but now that I am a pervy don’t give a shit I think it would be kind of hot provided I was loaded enough to just go with the flow bro. I had hair extensions in at wakestock and didn’t want that to be fussed with so I didn’t do it there either but we had enough horny mobscenes of jocks surrounding us, we had our fill. In the video of Lady Gaga crowd-surfing no one seems to be feeling her up out of celebrity respect despite her wearing a mesh body suit only.

Also have you seen this?

I love her makeup tutorials. Moving on.

Where am I?

The tale of 2 broke girls continues.

But we must start from the beginning. I was almost going to bail because after the taping of creeps on Wednesday night, your hero let’er rip on the town so I was not feeling so hot yesterday but I caught a second wind, got my act together and went out. Jules needed my +1 so I couldn’t pull a bail stunt. Aunt Raymi saves the day. Again.

They have their own little thing. My Friend™ does this for attention and she places herself in high traffic areas so that you cannot avoid her. She is ridinkulous and being a little more clingy lately now that Lady Garbage is gone. They cremated her. She is gone gone gone :( like I am picturing her in a box buried in the ground under a nice tree someplace then keep reminding myself that nope, not possible. I didn’t think to ask what they did to her and I wish I didn’t know because it makes me more sad. I think morbid heartbreaking thoughts as hard as possible to make myself sad so that I can feel feelings because I think it is healthy. Healthier than being a soulless bitch and just being oh whatever it’s a dumb cat bye bye, you know what I’m saying? I loved her. I gave her her own name, she had a few others but you all know her as Lady Garbage. Okay I just made myself cry next topic please.

Jules and her lollipops why must my 20 year old friend always constantly remind us about that? She’s going to be 21 soon and then she’s going to SF AND she’s going away for a month before that so naturally Bechnique and I are pretty gutted about that OMG crying again what a loser I need a f-ing nap haha.

I waved to her at one point when I was dancing on the vip booth and she was like, what? Lolhfkjdsfkjs that was hysterical to me.

Hilarious. It doesn’t look like that when you’re there and the lights are going all dance club bananas when the flash cancels that out and you get a photo like this the cloak of darkness protection vanishes and it’s just two funny dogs and people standing around. I love crowd scene photos, so many little stories going on and funny faces, stupid dance moves frozen in time.

This picture is funny to me we are all equally rtrd’d.

This one needs to be bigger because you need to take it all in.

I need hairapy. People be diggin’ ma ponytails. Not one other girl in ponytails out last night. Wonder when the trend will blow up. Maybe also cos I wore ponytails on creeps, we shall see.

See? I am stoked that there are TWO episodes of creeps. The finale is July 11 and the reunion episode is July 17 which I’ll miss cos I’m in Aruba so tape it for me and put it on tha internet. I got to have my retribution on the reunion episode so I must see it!!

Hours spent killing time between tapings on water and vegetables made the cast really bond, a happy and most welcome surprise. I’ll post the rest of my pics next post promise.

Makin’ fans and friends urrywhere I go.

Can you tell I had an all nighter (practically) the night before? Not really!

Seen here, guy in the tie is Bobby and he featured me in one of his columns in Elle magazine and it will be in the August issue he says. I gave him some manswers for dating advice or some such. Behind Lauren is Zach Bussey, more pics of him in a sec. He said we have met before but I have no recollection of that because I was probably tanked at the time and he looks like a nondescript average dude no offense. I meet tons of the same people over and over again at these twitter things and I still can’t remember a lot of their names but I know their faces and too much time and parties have gone by for me to go hey dude I’ve partied with ten thousand times what the fuck is your name again?

I remember when I had your hair Meg and then I messed it all up. I like you Meg, you’re sweet.

Zach this is a great angle for you.

Mr. Edgar what is up.

Uh great.

I fist pumped a lot last night and made it rain money. Yes it’s stupid but you can’t help it your arms just get in the air and before you know it you’re the epitome of, of, a total tool idiot. But it’s so fun espesh from the VIP area dancing and being watched and smiled at. That was so Kardashian of me. I can see a few people busting me taking this pic heh.

I like your shirt booboo.

Bobby and Meg, what’s that all aboot eh? Do tell. I’d watch! Okay mommy’s tired see you on the couch. Have a killer weekend! I’m dancing in the Pride parade on Sunday/Canada day I can fit one more girl if you’re interested.

Disgustingly yours, Raymapaloser.

Somewhere over the Raymbo

I don’t even know what to say these shoes are so hype. I’ve been sitting on these pictures for weeks eagerly anticipating sharing them with you. My buddy Shane has a company called Social St8ment and he does custom designs for A-list celebs + 1 minx. It is a frigging honour to have these made for me I know it. He made a pair of shoes for Michael Buble and got to deliver them on the set of SNL’s xmas episode. Shane, aka Dez !gner is a mad genius and he “gets” your hero so he hooked me up with my own pair and I cannot thank him enough. I think it’s a smart concept to make a pair of shoes for someone he likes and the deal is he gets to personally deliver them himself (photo ops!) so when he hits town in July that’s when these Steve Madden Raymbo Brites will be sitting purty on ma feets. Here is what they looked like beforehand.

As you can tell, drab. My Raymbo Brites feature the colours of this here blog you are looking at, my Minx tattoo (Renita will love that) vomments, and pic of the moment as well as custom laces and the SS logo on the heel part.

Such a social st8ment indeed.

And before again.

Can’t wait to groove my brains out in them. Also, here is the sweet thing Dez wrote about me/it/them.

Hey Minxers,

I stumbled upon Lauren’s blog several months ago now. What I do for a living is highly creative and I meet some pretty neat people along my travels with this shoe design venture of mine. I sent out an email to her praising her creativity, her wit, her willingness to invite us into her universe through her blogging platform. Long story short, a friendship of sorts was formed. I reached out to design a pair of shoes for her, well, because I can. I reach out, usually once a month to someone I admire, someone I can relate to and someone or something I may be into at the given time. I have reached out and done shoes for some very big celebrities and some of the coolest brands in the world and rubbed shoulders with people I genuinely idolize, all through a talent and a passion for the gifts I have been blessed with since birth.

Do I sit here and pretend, like a lot of the Minx followers, that I know her inside and out? No, I do not. Nor does she of me. But here is what I do know:

Raymi is incredibly talented, thoughtful, analytical and creative. Try writing and taking photos every day for a month. I bet you give up. She has done it for over a decade, all with the passion and uniqueness to keep us coming back. That is not something many can do, let alone do it well. She is also rather sensitive, emotional and caring. She also doesn’t like idiot people judging her and will tell you as much, often in a brash way. How many people do you know that are an open book, quite honest, always frank and speak from a place of real passion?

My guess is not many or none. But Raymi has that, and she has it by the boat load.

Sometimes when we read her blog, she may not come across well because you cannot read her tone and you cannot grasp the speed at which her mind works. But it is fast. Fast and it is true.

In short, she walks a very different tightrope, far above your rain clouds.

So you may ask yourself, why would I reach out to her and do something so nice all on my dime. Well, because I can.

As far as the design and background of this heel, it came together in a day. I had a little window in what is a busy schedule, and in a matter of 10 minutes, I branded a heel to Raymi’s website colors and some little personal touches I thought she may appreciate. Plus a one-off Raymbo Brite (like Rainbow Brite from decades ago) logo I designed many moons ago for her that you may have seen sprinkled on her website and Twitter account.

As far as the rest, that is between me and LUH-REN. But know this, she appreciates my talents as much as I do hers. And I am happy to call her a friend.

Wireless love from the left coast of Canada.

The Dez!gner
-Social Statement Custom Footwear

You’re helping build the legend bro, thank you ever so much. :)



What do we do when we fall off the horse?

We get back on, Little Raymis, we get back on.

Ready for round II? Ah duh.

Hi Lena!

The penguins would make little runs for it it was so funny and cute, they’d puff up their chests and flap wings and SCRAM then the girls would have to scoot them back in again. We were so close we could have touched one but we’d get pecked potentially which one girl did much to our amusement lol.

I went from crying to laughing in seconds. Normally a sign of hysteria or any form of crazy but I was at a zoo extreme emotion boomerangs happen here. Animals in captivity (usually injured so it’s a sanctuary of sorts), new ones being born, winemotional. To recapyou though, Lady Garbage was put down this day + a dude ran in to me with wine glasses after a downpour (thunder and lightning scare me & rain PISSES ME OFF! If I have to be out in it)(Plus I am still sick and was at the time) are these enough reasons for crying yet? Thank you.

The universal cat call known as pss pss pss worked like a c harm we had thing thing near us in seconds. You should have seen Bech get an Eagle to squak at her to STFU! cos of her voice and annoying talking at it bahaha ps. check out her tumblr I updated like a crazyiac last night. It’s fun currating other people’s images and putting the best-ofs together or whatever. I am the shittiest best friend ever!

AW I LOVE IT I WANT IT EXPLOSION!!!! Also I am pretty. Shut up don’t tell anyone you’re making me blush.

So close. Bech looks like a 7 year old that is what I love about her.

I just said Aw Booboodoodoo out loud. If you can tell me where that term originates from I will blow a fart on your tum tum. Mom no telling.

Two of them!


It was ridinkulous. We were on our way to the stingrays and I was like whaaaaaat!

Yes that is actually what I was like. That is a thing now. I hope I get on Letterman before he retires so I can be a total asshole to him back. I don’t like how he is unraveling and being a POS (piece of sh-) to guests like a drunk prick uncle. You adapt to society, do not expect it to adapt to you. Remember that everyone.

HAhaah lovely. You can’t bring your wine in so we chug them and then go drunk in to the stingrays it is a ball of a time.

She’s all we wouldn’t let you go very far with them and I said you couldn’t catch me anyway hey colleague check out her foot! HAPPY BIRTHDAY COLLEAGUE B T W! The ghost with the most! LOL ((((colleague)))) o_O :) Now tune-up ma bike we got stuffs ta do tomorrow.

Wash your hands so we don’t get our dirty hands all over the stingrays.

Doing the same last year.

Rebecca is MAJORLY focusing.

And last year.

We went right to work.

We’re like one of those movies based on people who work at sea world having adventures and romances and heartbreak and valuable life lessons I get to be Adam Sandler called it.

We are whispering bad girl things and daring each other to be tough guys.

Here I am bragging about this being my THIRD year in a row petting these freaky alien sharks and bein’ straight ballin’ gangster god how annoying I am sorry Rebecca (NOT).

Ya gotta get right on in there. Now why was I getting stink eye again lol. Like I care.

We were already damp, moist, and/or soaked from the downpour so what did it matter anymore? There was one particular stingraymi™ that was a punk dick! It splashed me big time, lots of people, but it was being playful really I felt cos it kept coming back for more. Some will come up for a pet they like it.

This is the one (what kind of shark is it?) that we held on to that was pretty ballsy what if it turned around and bit us? I would if some stupid girls were holding me like a snake. Raymbecca does as Raymbecca pleases.

See? she did it first I had to stop her because I have maternal instincts whilst Bech’s snake-charming ones kicked in to overdrive HAHAHA fantastic.

I am so dramatic. I was destined to be a gay icon. #truth.

Thanks a lot Raymbecca.

Oh my god seriously?

Do you come in large?

I would not quit until I held this one.

Lots of them in this area, they circle the entire pool but the meat of them are all here it’s like petting central.

Careful we’re about to get creeped.

Colleague liked this one most of all haha lawda mercy!


It was a juicy day in the Raymbohood. Atin’ and drankin’

That’s Raymbecca as sharks.

Time to dry off.

Love my neon nails.

Flirty nearing thirty.

Wiping the moisture from my stupid phone camera lens.


Continue reading

It’s just blogitics baby

This post started out innocently (no it didn’t) enough until I started emailing myself pictures from my phone and then kept going and going and then 70 later blahaha why god whyyy too much it’s just too much. All the deadlines I’ve got real or imagined are driving me bonkers. I’ve got no focus. I just danced around in my underwear after plugging my phone in on the other side of the room to help me hyper focus and then that turned in to a conceited underwear ritual of sexy movement and by sexy I mean Mary Katharine Gallagher meets Tori Amos. Barf. I blame Florence. One of my top ten daily rotated tracks.

Whatever it’s summer have fun with it. I have one week to myself til Teach is off school for good which is also stressing me out but in a fun way.

So this is a goof-off post as no one expects much from me anyway and I just remembered it’s ME Monday and the second half of the zoo post can wait. Like the mexicans Sal Paradise hung, lived, and worked with say in On the Road, Mañana. Here’s a quote,

“Sure baby, mañana. It was always mañana. For the next few weeks that was all I heard––mañana a lovely word and one that probably means heaven.”

― Jack Kerouac, On the Road

This was a grand time, save for the downpour. Which was also kinda fun but maybe that’s how I am sick again or still sick. It’s making my lids heavy. Don’t worry I am fighting it.

Oh hi there. Yesterday we had dinner at spice route. Sundays they have a tasting buffet menu only and they ply you with food it was awesome. Martinis are $5 too.

That’s where the superheros sit and talk business.

You see this when you die. We rick-rolled this party. That shirt Bech is wearing was one of the first most expensive shirts I ever bought. I don’t like wasting money so it was a big deal to me even though it was just $115 or something. Plus the dry cleaning cost me $30 (it’s silk). You get to borrow it Bech.

I pigged out.

I emailed this to Bechnique, “lol wtf” and she said, “Bhahaha….something shoot out of there.” and I said, “bahahhahahahhahahahhahahahhahaha.” That is all. There’s just so much crap on the splash pad and in this day and age of blog-photography and events (drinking) you end up posing by the dumbest shit.

What if you were floating in this pool and then a rhinocerous stampede happened? I would piss myself. Peeing in your OOL.

Fish and guac on a wonton. Colleague can tell me the who and what in the vomments. Or not.


Water shoots out of the duck butt. RIDINKULOUS. No, RIBUTTULOUS.

Rain frowns. Raymeman.

Psyche! This was so fun. It was warm and we were on a splash pad the place to be if it gets wet. My purse was protected from the rain it was party time excellent except for when I cried.

Wally World we made it!

I was a-scurred the whole way there.

On this day, Wednesday? Tuesday/Wednesday I sweated out pints of sweaty sweat like it was mawfuckin Trainspotting ugh. BUT it worked my fever and sick (the majority of) left my system. Then we ordered tortilla flats (FATS) and watched tv as I traveled in and out of consciousness. Or someone could go on my Twitter and tell me what I did.

Dad’s naybe’s ride.

Dad I turned your pin into a fridge magnet.

Went out like this to get Coffee in Burnoutington. It was a bit of a scene.

Don’t fight the coug or the coug fights you.

Curly had many expensive dogs. My grade five speech was on the 3 Stooges.

Sometimes it feels like I should get a round of applause afterwards too.



This is me.

Dad’s spotless pad.

RTM was here.

Hello Rocky Raccoon.


LOVE The Joshua Tree album. Undyingly so.

It was a nice and chill Father’s Day that I looked forward too just for the nxne week to be over I needed a city break.

Forced my dad to drive me to McD’s once he picked me up from the station, then to the champagne store afterward of course. He’s like no we are getting pizza! Yeah no problem I’ll eat that too.

Digging the shiny loonies.

That looks stressful to construct.

If thy lady doth make you feel good then show it.

Lumpy legs? Preposterous.

That’s my Jennay (Gump voice).

Gaydorable. Hey it’s pride this w/e! SWEET.

Welcome to Dynasty I’m your hoser host Lazy the Minx esq.

Nosin’ this red. Mmm.

I want this for dinner.

Good times.

I like the cohesion of the diff levels of my teeth and the skyline.

First time wearing my dress out. I took it off instantly on the roof so it didn’t really count.

I’m going to get a new bikini from Holt v soon. One that matches. These bottoms are from my Grinch costume.

I should get the matching top already. I will. AA wishlist.

Before that mimosas with Tanya at the Dog and Bear. It was a heatwave scorcher out and we sweated our balls off back there. Now experiencing Tanya withdrawal! I did my nails at the table when people left yes I know it’s rude but I ran out of time.

I’ve had these since I was 21. They are kind of like Rugby shoes IMO. I like old man fashions thanks to my inner tomboy. They need to be upgraded.

I need more leotards.

Yesterday at the movies. We were silly from dinner drinks also it’s like I don’t go out much so it was an event, which is how I do. Okay time for some juice have a wonderful afternoon.