Crowd surf fail

Oh hi there just calling to say hi. I am not a phone person, I am a text person. I do not enjoy speaking on the phone. I see it as a waste of my time. Once in awhile I love a good chat but mostly I like to just sit in silence alone all day long hunched over my laptop. Sir Hunch-a-lot. So, if I do call you it’s because I think I am in trouble or I am fighting with you and have too many things to type about how much you have offended/annoyed me. I disperse my gossip evenly throughout my top five texters but sometimes it’s good to just have radio silence and cut your secrets in half, like maybe I shouldn’t say that one part, yeah, I’ll sleep better.

See how he just gets dumped down like that, you gotta be quicker bro. Some randoms were like are you going to crowd surf? Uh, no. One doesn’t leave the house thinking am I going to crowd surf tonight? baha I’d love to be the kind of person though where that would be a possibility. I am not going to have kids until I fucking crowdsurf goddammit. Summer bucket list. I crowd surfed at Metallica when I was 15 and it took me practically the entire show to get the balls to do it. But then I did it twice. And then I learned what happens to chicks who crowdsurf. Disgusting gropetastical city. Then I was young and naive so I didn’t enjoy it but now that I am a pervy don’t give a shit I think it would be kind of hot provided I was loaded enough to just go with the flow bro. I had hair extensions in at wakestock and didn’t want that to be fussed with so I didn’t do it there either but we had enough horny mobscenes of jocks surrounding us, we had our fill. In the video of Lady Gaga crowd-surfing no one seems to be feeling her up out of celebrity respect despite her wearing a mesh body suit only.

Also have you seen this?

I love her makeup tutorials. Moving on.

Where am I?

The tale of 2 broke girls continues.

But we must start from the beginning. I was almost going to bail because after the taping of creeps on Wednesday night, your hero let’er rip on the town so I was not feeling so hot yesterday but I caught a second wind, got my act together and went out. Jules needed my +1 so I couldn’t pull a bail stunt. Aunt Raymi saves the day. Again.

They have their own little thing. My Friend™ does this for attention and she places herself in high traffic areas so that you cannot avoid her. She is ridinkulous and being a little more clingy lately now that Lady Garbage is gone. They cremated her. She is gone gone gone :( like I am picturing her in a box buried in the ground under a nice tree someplace then keep reminding myself that nope, not possible. I didn’t think to ask what they did to her and I wish I didn’t know because it makes me more sad. I think morbid heartbreaking thoughts as hard as possible to make myself sad so that I can feel feelings because I think it is healthy. Healthier than being a soulless bitch and just being oh whatever it’s a dumb cat bye bye, you know what I’m saying? I loved her. I gave her her own name, she had a few others but you all know her as Lady Garbage. Okay I just made myself cry next topic please.

Jules and her lollipops why must my 20 year old friend always constantly remind us about that? She’s going to be 21 soon and then she’s going to SF AND she’s going away for a month before that so naturally Bechnique and I are pretty gutted about that OMG crying again what a loser I need a f-ing nap haha.

I waved to her at one point when I was dancing on the vip booth and she was like, what? Lolhfkjdsfkjs that was hysterical to me.

Hilarious. It doesn’t look like that when you’re there and the lights are going all dance club bananas when the flash cancels that out and you get a photo like this the cloak of darkness protection vanishes and it’s just two funny dogs and people standing around. I love crowd scene photos, so many little stories going on and funny faces, stupid dance moves frozen in time.

This picture is funny to me we are all equally rtrd’d.

This one needs to be bigger because you need to take it all in.

I need hairapy. People be diggin’ ma ponytails. Not one other girl in ponytails out last night. Wonder when the trend will blow up. Maybe also cos I wore ponytails on creeps, we shall see.

See? I am stoked that there are TWO episodes of creeps. The finale is July 11 and the reunion episode is July 17 which I’ll miss cos I’m in Aruba so tape it for me and put it on tha internet. I got to have my retribution on the reunion episode so I must see it!!

Hours spent killing time between tapings on water and vegetables made the cast really bond, a happy and most welcome surprise. I’ll post the rest of my pics next post promise.

Makin’ fans and friends urrywhere I go.

Can you tell I had an all nighter (practically) the night before? Not really!

Seen here, guy in the tie is Bobby and he featured me in one of his columns in Elle magazine and it will be in the August issue he says. I gave him some manswers for dating advice or some such. Behind Lauren is Zach Bussey, more pics of him in a sec. He said we have met before but I have no recollection of that because I was probably tanked at the time and he looks like a nondescript average dude no offense. I meet tons of the same people over and over again at these twitter things and I still can’t remember a lot of their names but I know their faces and too much time and parties have gone by for me to go hey dude I’ve partied with ten thousand times what the fuck is your name again?

I remember when I had your hair Meg and then I messed it all up. I like you Meg, you’re sweet.

Zach this is a great angle for you.

Mr. Edgar what is up.

Uh great.

I fist pumped a lot last night and made it rain money. Yes it’s stupid but you can’t help it your arms just get in the air and before you know it you’re the epitome of, of, a total tool idiot. But it’s so fun espesh from the VIP area dancing and being watched and smiled at. That was so Kardashian of me. I can see a few people busting me taking this pic heh.

I like your shirt booboo.

Bobby and Meg, what’s that all aboot eh? Do tell. I’d watch! Okay mommy’s tired see you on the couch. Have a killer weekend! I’m dancing in the Pride parade on Sunday/Canada day I can fit one more girl if you’re interested.

Disgustingly yours, Raymapaloser.