are you being gay when you play with your own dick?
Free polls from

meet pierre

his breath smells like brie and he is a distinguished little guy who hangs out in audrey’s purse

he licks the entire inside of ears too

we have the same hair

look it’s me again

please explain to me what is going on here thank you. when i google hangover this guy comes up and all his wacky friends. is it like an internet meet-up from 1990? i want in. they’re so zany i’m obsessed! if you go on the main page of that link it explains what’s going on: Over Labor Day 1997, Kris Jacobs hosted a get-together (dubbed “WOBCon II”) at Schlitterbahn in New Braunfels, Texas. Many more WOBbers attended, and this, too, was a great success with a wonderful time being had by all (except, perhaps, those whose undies ended up in the freezer!). Such a great time was had, that a pact was formed by those present that this should be repeated each year over Labor Day weekend. It was also the means to share the many photos and stories that was the original reason to dedicate a web site to a mailing list!

why not go to a beach
on labor day hhahaha i know

me: awesome
so good they went to a cabin for the third one

me: are u stalking them now hahaha

me: theyre partying right now! well i wouldn’t call it stalking

me: as we speak
HA i know!
i’m actually kinda jealous of the nerds now

me: i am too! i wish i was at a cottage :(

me: dont start or i will kill myself
omg they have a one liners page!


it’s so hot i think i’m gonna barf

why this fantastic weather at the end of summer?

and fil has to work on monday

er;darhg3r5hipj5 0[yu340hfbnfdlbndf;b.

it’s also too hot to be fashionable right now. can i wear a slip n slide to your bbq guys?

oh hey, didn’t see ya there, what’s up?

mo party mo farty

oh man all i want to do is talk about lean on me right now but i have a bunch of stupid pictures to put up instead first, did you know candyman was in lean on me? big news i know. k here are the rest of thursday nite’s shitshow. oh and the heat lamps fucked with my pictures.

so, steph shows up already hammed. it was funny.

i have no idea what they’re talking about here cos steph’s ADD totally rubbed off on me. i do know that alicia came by yesterday to get her ID and was all you’re so skinny you look so skinny what is that and i say uh, it’s because i’m skinny and she goes uh no it’s not. hahaha. then says well i was thinking that yesterday too you looked skinny. DUDE MAYBE IT’S COS I-AM-SKINNNNNNNNNNY! deal with it!

you are in my posing area.

no one can get over how much of a cock cid is they think they can win him over on the spot cos they see him in pictures on my blog, trust me guys, he hates you.

what is this wilson phillips?


oh man k had enough.

oh jen.

heat lamp sauna.

blast you heat lamp!

aw poor steph so nervous! her jealousy was palpable from across the room when i would glitz and glide from conversation to conversation effortlessly. this is what she was thinking in her head if you don’t say anything you won’t say anything stupid. this was a big nite for our girl.

fil and some guy he went to school with who noticed fil bla blah snore.

dude hired by skyy to spy on us and take pictures conveniently shows up as vodka runs out, then eventually was replenished, we were so parched waiting for it we got beers and not even a minute later a bottle materializes. he got a nice pic of me pouring it straight in my mouth. you’re welcome skyy vodka.

oh what a striking green!

it’s ok you’re safe now. weed plus booze plus crowded patio, did you learn your lesson?

i would not shut up about jimmy so embodying charlie bucket. there’s something hugely unfair about party dudes with grey hair, women can’t pull that off. i intend to try it.

olga and sonia made jen this creepy texas chainsaw massacresque doll.

then off to social for the mobilemoment party. interesting scene.

i texted MY FRIEND HAS BIG LABES WHAT DO I DO SHE IS BY THE SPEAKERS but it didn’t appear. i wrote something else less offensive afterward, can’t remember.

a pint glass spilled, fil swears up and down it was the reverb that did it. ooh and we got free cab chits too. wicked.


ok so every summer when i was a kid we went away for a week to sauble beach or wasaga, or to the cottage, sometimes we did all three in a week. the older we got the more beach it was over the cottage. anyway, before each trip my grandpa would give us (my brother and i) a couple twenties to spend on our vacation. thanks grandpa! usually i blew it on truly ridiculous shit like whoopie cushions, water guns, a plastic switchblade, inflatable toys, whatever. i remember i had this teeny little cushion shaped like a heart that my grandma made and it had a little pocket on it, it was a tooth fairy pillow thing, she made one for my brother too, very whimsical and it had lace trim, pretty gay actually but very sweet. anyway, i decided that this thing was going to hold my forty dollars, so in my 2 bills went and where did i decide to keep it? i hung it off the dry cleaning hook in the back seat of the car above my head and stared at it for the majority of the ride to sauble beach. i remember at one stop my dad was like what the fuck is that and unhooked it and i flipped out. seriously this thing was probably the least stealth flimsiest dumbest money hider ever. anyway, i only lasted maybe a couple hours having it hanging there, why i couldn’t just put my money in my pocket to begin with? as i stared up at it i fantasized over all the things i would spend that money on.

i didn’t end up spending my money until after we got back from vacation and i bought two huge trolls of course, with purple hair, in wedding attire, one groom one bride. they were the monster-sized ones. prior to vacation was my uncle’s wedding and i was a junior bridesmaid and my dress was purple and i was OBSESSED and CONSUMED with weddings now cos i had so much fun that nite and i felt heartsick about it being over oh man so gay i know. i even bought a flower girl and ring bearer troll to complete the set. i also had like 30 other trolls.


ok i will go get my journal and transcribe all the entries that revolve around that wedding it’s pretty pathetic. oh wait i did spend some of that money on a beavis and butthead t-shirt that made me wicked fucking cool once september rolled around.

i seriously don’t know how parents can keep a straight face when their kids are being total morons. my kid is going to be so over the moon oh man can’t wait for the zingers.


ok and remember i said i am never blogging about diets again? well i still get asked about it a lot, i found the post i wrote finally when i did phase two of dieting and lost more weight. here it is FUCKING BOOKMARK IT THIS TIME.



me: no
when did u do a troll thing


i didnt write about it
i just found them with my barbies and took them out

me: aw
mine are the big obnoxious ones
i wonder if i can sell them on ebay for some good coin

Highwaisted: maybe
that is fucking hilarious
we should play with them

we should make a skit and film it for my blog
because i dont think all of toronto is convinced that i am a fucking lunatic enough yet

Highwaisted: um that would be amazing
im in

me: it will end in sex and violence obvs

Highwaisted: amazing