as in what the fuck else is new

a slew of photos of me i tried not to get any of you guys in them this time.

ok except for this one i missed my chance to capture the pretty bouquet t’was before this baby’s pretentious breath collection (or whatever it is), we’ve been at the whistle so many times over the last few weeks i felt a kinship with that fucking bouquet.

hey what’s up i came to be extremely moody and to party, the first part is taken care of now bring on the rest.

oh i was in a nice place last nite i was.

my friend jeff put his flash on my matt’s camera. now i want one. but i’m not a camera dweeb like err ahh, anyway. ps. if you want to buy one of fil’s framed photos hit us up, cheaper than my stuff!

see the flash difference now and how washed out my beautiful face is? learning is fun.

hi kid.

i met this guy paul before at matt’s birthday party, funny how alcohol totally thiefs your memories like that eh? turns out he’s some kind of deal i dunno i was too busy making up dumb jokes about his glasses. we blabbed about our mutual appreciation for christmas thanks to his shirt.

matt just told me i met paul before BEFORE too. hahahaha.

regrettably i am not in this picture but the following quips from our man on the right were hilariously incriminating. not regarding zach though unfortch.

in the foreground, awesome, in the background, matt realises he knows paul too.

when we left the steamwhistle a nice snowball fight ensued it felt really nice smashing snow in matt’s face, like, super good nice. no snow jobs were had as we knew how that would turn out. at the end of the skywalk we were greeted by four security, the only female of the lot had the balls to be the deliverer of the you must exit the station news. i’m sure they could hear us all the way from the other end of the walkway screaming and hurling snow bombs. scattered on the ground up ahead on our path were a ton of white triangle paper cups, they looked like snow and we thought OH YES more ammo until we came upon them to realise no, not snow. good time that was.

i washed my hands like crazy when i got home.

skid clan came out to represent, i’m laughing cos to everyone else on the subway it looked like i just jumped on these stranger’s laps for a photograph. i even did the walking down the stairs bit when we got off before them i realise none of this is making sense so have a nice one.

my cat marlowe


I got hooked on your blog sometime in 2004 or 5, I think. I’ve checked in at least once or twice a week ever since.

I wrote you once before–just a one-off, throwaway “hi, love your blog” thing.

I’m sending a pic of my cat because I had to take him to the vet for the last time last night.

I miss him and I’ve been a mess all day. It was/is so much harder than I had prepared for.

I don’t know what is motivating me to send this to you, but I’m going with it. I know cid is a big part of your lives, so I’m sorry if this is an intrusive bummer.

Marlowe loved to drink from the faucet. He would sit on the bathroom sink and wait for me to get out of the shower and then pester me until I turned on the cold water. He’d sit and drink while I put in my contacts.

He had bad farts sometimes. He always looked guilty when he let one go, especially if he happened to be in my lap when he did it.

Anyway, I just wanted someone to know he was my best bud from the time he was a kitten and it really sucks that I only got to spend eleven years with him.


siiigh, to marlowe.

being a pet lover/owner is a slippery slope cos we know that inevitably our little buddy will leave before us but our lives are all the more richer for ever having them in it and they make us better people.

all in black we snuck up around the back

i feel like these guys at least understand me right now ugh i know shut up.

there was actually a dial tone.

what shitty overpriced faire should i go with tonite? we were planning to go to irie but we walked in the wrong direction and it was too snowy cold annoying to walk back in the other direction.

stay classy san diego.

the taco bell view was hilarious to me at the time.

yes because when i think of mexican food i think carrot cake, BEST carrot cake at that.

vodka rain, like purple rain, except vodka, and actually nothing like it at all.

i think i’m having a wee turning 26 meltdown, folks.

yeah, just a little bit.



are those AA disco pants?

ugh don’t even bother guessing how many full house photos i have on my laptop. i realize i have a problem, yes.

in other great news i found out last nite my makeup is being discontinued. the girl at the cosmetic counter said just to let you know this is being discontinued i said but what am i going to do!? hahaha. they didn’t even have my shade (still) so i chose a lighter one, so get ready for ghostface killah no more orange oprah. ahh down right rotten land much.

i just annihilated a solid hour of wii fit and feel slightly less insane.



ever wake up feeling heartbroken for no reason?

i am sick of winter i need a holiday.

i dreamt it was summer and i was buying a white beach dress by a pool, i woke up and i was none of those things.

watched benjamin button last nite and my face was a river.

see you at the steamwhistle tonite for fil‘s closing party and my fantastic mood. it’s going to be another one of their unsigned bender nites with bands and snacks and liquor etc.

hair scare

my idea, i invented it, no copying.

oh look a black candle at tattoo “rock” parlour how totally err, expected?


i’m sorry (not sorry) but that was extremely hilarious to me. a white candle likely would have pushed me right over the edge. or a pink one. i think my being a jerk is pretty much guaranteed always.

speaking of jerks, matt left his own dinner party AT HIS PLACE stinking ripped no less to specifically place gum in my hair and then blame me for it. thanks pal.

gill the frenchie was there what is this a fucking reunion?

one part curtis santiago came to hang, this be mikey. i asked what colour is next for the m’awk, he says red, i say platinum?

oh right we’re here for brad‘s show that’s him back there. ps. the new songs are great.

why so deer in headlights this is nothing new you know.

ahh the buddy pose, you should have both tilted your heads and hugged each other, my favourite.

cowboy is partly responsible for the gum in my hair, he jinxed it by having the same length hair as me.

the look on my face, brought to you by ketel one.


oh right yeah shh sorry this.

adoring proud supportive sister renita, so cute.

do you guys remember goldfinger? that’s their drummer darrin.

great lighting.

then it happened fucking hell. i leaned over to chat up matt who was drunk swaying in the breeze there, i turn my head and my hair somehow gets inside his open maw and drags out his gum. look how much he is concerned about it too. the cowboy was horrified, long haireds get it.

allison put ice on it and got it all out, had to rip out some hair though.

the consensus was hey at least you have something to blog about tomorrow. what? fuck you. you think i don’t have other shit going on to talk about like old ladies in my building and squirrels, yeah excuse me while i contact the star so they can run this byte as well.

so the end of brad’s set was spent like this, thank you matt!

everyone sitting behind us you’re welcome for the show.


check the bags of vodka, i wasn’t supposed to get a bottle cos i was fil’s plus 1 then i told cameron um well this lack of bottle will influence my blog post tomorrow…

love is an understatement.

cam could not resist.

robert plant was on this wall before that eyesore was painted over top.

ok vodka 101 to come shortly though i am not that obligated cos i was just a lowly plus oner. who thinks i’m even influential to begin with? pfft. maybe your mom.

AM Matthew: how’s the hair?
11:35 AM me: ugh
im hung
Matthew: me too
me: you blamed me for it all nite remember
v cavalier of you
Matthew: had to take a cab to work
me: ha
Matthew: dude, you swung your hair and it went it my mouth
if anything you owe me a piece of gum
me: see there you go
instead of im sorry
11:36 AM Matthew: hahaha
I’m sorry it happened to you but I didn’t do anything to make it happen other than chew gum
11:37 AM me: and open your big mouth
Matthew: I will never open my mouth again when I am around you, deal?
Matthew: hahaha
11:38 AM I’m just going to completely ignore you when you’re talking to me just in case it happens again
me: well i will refrain from being a nice friend and chatting you up when you are alone drunk swaying in the breeze
Matthew: perfect!
glad we have that settled
11:39 AM me: like i give a fuck if your brother knows about that polish cabbie
actually lying, DYING to know
Matthew: haha still haven’t told him
I’ll see him on Friday though
me: you owe me a story


just hangin’ with bowie, no bigs.

an urgent call to nowhere is placed.

the secret to tan lines sans back loop lines shall be revealed…

last nite we did a ketel one vodka at the spoke club (ooh fancy) tasting then saw brad’s band at tattoo, in-between some terrible food was had at tortilla flats. brb when my brain gets together and decides to just chill oot. i lost some of my hair to gum last nite compliments of matt, allison helped get it out. muchos stories to tell.


to live life outside the world

so this kid when i was 21, this kid drives his little shitbox car to oakville from brampton to take me out for drinks cos i’m bored shitless and broke, he even brought me a box of ferrero rocher cute no? (fil out of spite helped me annihilate them later on that evening. jealousy traps work ladies hear me now, always!) he was 18 i think or 19. anyway, he was way positive and un-jaded, super nice, very naive and not one bitter bone in his body and i was trying to bounce all the shitty things i knew of the world on to him to warn him or some such thing. we were sitting on the curb out front of what used to be the three judges back when i smoked, the town ‘mo was flirting up a storm with him and my two other guy friends who stopped by blah bla blah anyway he recently found me on facebook and wrote me asking if i had remembered him to which i replied:

Raymi Lauren White
January 24 at 12:56pm
i remember hi! how are you, still positive and all that hopefully, jaded?
how old are you now


January 24 at 1:35pm
ha its nice that you could remember how naively positive I can be. no I’m not really the same unfortunately, but its really not that unfortunate. I’m not in any mood to be hopeful, I think you nailed it with jaded. I’m 23 now, flunked out of university because it was useless to me, living on the outskirts of the city to save on rent, selling weed to make money cause I lost my job before christmas, basically uninspired towards any forward momentum. stopped blogging forever ago I couldn’t keep it up, my outlets now are music reviews and a graphic zombie trilogy I’m hammering out, my first experience with writing dialogue.

I’m either going to get more involved with Toronto soon or I’m getting the fuck out entirely for a while and trying a new city. let me know if you have any ideas of how to stay or where to go, I feel like you’d be one to know.

seriously hope to run into you sometime, small city and all.

this is actually him:

just kidding, this is him now:

seriously, do you have some advice for the guy? and while you’re at it any for me too? my advice meter is kinda tapped right now. should i eat a chocolate bar or have a chicken sandwich?