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to live life outside the world

so this kid when i was 21, this kid drives his little shitbox car to oakville from brampton to take me out for drinks cos i’m bored shitless and broke, he even brought me a box of ferrero rocher cute no? (fil out of spite helped me annihilate them later on that evening. jealousy traps work ladies hear me now, always!) he was 18 i think or 19. anyway, he was way positive and un-jaded, super nice, very naive and not one bitter bone in his body and i was trying to bounce all the shitty things i knew of the world on to him to warn him or some such thing. we were sitting on the curb out front of what used to be the three judges back when i smoked, the town ‘mo was flirting up a storm with him and my two other guy friends who stopped by blah bla blah anyway he recently found me on facebook and wrote me asking if i had remembered him to which i replied:

Raymi Lauren White
January 24 at 12:56pm
i remember hi! how are you, still positive and all that hopefully, jaded?
how old are you now


January 24 at 1:35pm
ha its nice that you could remember how naively positive I can be. no I’m not really the same unfortunately, but its really not that unfortunate. I’m not in any mood to be hopeful, I think you nailed it with jaded. I’m 23 now, flunked out of university because it was useless to me, living on the outskirts of the city to save on rent, selling weed to make money cause I lost my job before christmas, basically uninspired towards any forward momentum. stopped blogging forever ago I couldn’t keep it up, my outlets now are music reviews and a graphic zombie trilogy I’m hammering out, my first experience with writing dialogue.

I’m either going to get more involved with Toronto soon or I’m getting the fuck out entirely for a while and trying a new city. let me know if you have any ideas of how to stay or where to go, I feel like you’d be one to know.

seriously hope to run into you sometime, small city and all.

this is actually him:

just kidding, this is him now:

seriously, do you have some advice for the guy? and while you’re at it any for me too? my advice meter is kinda tapped right now. should i eat a chocolate bar or have a chicken sandwich?

24 thoughts on “to live life outside the world

  1. -Go for a warm chicken sandwich, its cold outside and I don’t imagine heating a chocolate bar would go over that well.

    -If that guy moves away, DO NOT let him move to Winnipeg. Winnipeg is sketchy and not the good kind of sketchy either.

  2. i’d say chix sandwich but that’s bc i don’t feel like chocolate right now.

    the dude’s young (so are you) and i’d say PRODUCE. if you write, write lots, if you paint, paint lots…the world’s less conventional than it was a year ago and while job searching may not be all fruitbaskets these days you can still build your own personal brand and image and portfolio and in the end that’s time well spent.

  3. A change of scenery can really give you perspective … as someone who recently moved from Ottawa to Vancouver and *actually* considering going back again.

  4. My advice is to keep on going with the zombie writing. Zombies make everything better. Seriously, the best way to gain momentum is to do something you love, and if that’s zombies and music reviews, there’s always a way to make a living at it if you try hard enough.

  5. my advice: enjoy it while it’s here because like it or not, things will change. also! never stop, not for one second, thinking about what you want the next ( ) to be like. that way, when you get there you can really appreciate it.

    also montreal is awesome.

  6. He really asked for help and probably needs more than he wants you to know. Tell him to go home to his family and seek professional career counseling like a responsible adult would do. That, or end up on the Social Services train ride to nowhere and live off everybody else’s taxes in the American state with the most give a ways, NY.


  7. Tell him to
    A) Move to Calgary, lots of oil money here and good artsy scene!
    B) Give me a call, because despite the tutu, he’s cute.

  8. I say go north. There’s a lot of stuff going on up north that Southern Ontario people miss out on. Might be a good change of pace.

  9. what the shit does, “get more involved with Toronto” mean?

    is toronto his band?

    pick a port and sail to it. and don’t stop until you get there.

    even if you’re not sure if it’s right, it’s better than sitting and spinning your wheels. good things happen when you’re moving. nothing happens when you’re not.

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