It’s a 22 I call her Peggy Sue

I thought I was going to be a-scared of being on a vespa. My ex had a Triumph crotch rocket and I loved that at first but then I got fat and nervous and once he had the cow he didn’t have to take it for motorcycle rides anymore (I hope you are appreciating the imagery here) but anyway, the fear is gone Tommy Chong! I love that shit. I bet colleague is pissed cos I talked him out of getting one because I was secretly (and vocally) afraid of being on one, plus my hair and makeup would be a wreck by the time we got to the gig.

My first time at Sadie’s diner. They are liquor licenseless but that’s a good thing for a floozy boozy like me. A mimosa would have hit the spot though.

This post is going to be ridinkulously non-sensical and time disjointed because that’s how I uploaded everything and who’s to lie, how I live too. I just realized the weekend was over. It’s Tuesday. I learn lessons on Monday nights when I venture out to eat and all the kitchens are closed. If you could give me a list of late night foodie kitchens that are open that would be awesome. I’m on west coast time haha. I am the future and the past. This podcast is typed.

This airs tonight! Why they said the eleventh in the email about it I do not know but today is not the eleventh right? How can I get better at managing my time schedule if other people keep fucking it up for me too thanks MTV! Finale Creeps episode is tonight at 9:30 Canadur!! Sorry America, you will have to wait. Or move here. Do you like ketchup chips?

Pulled out my red wrapped mini-belt bracelet from F21. Bought one for my niece too.

Safety first.


Somewhere over the Raymbo way up high there’s a blog that I heard of once in a lullaby. FACT. People periodically and frequently have dreams about me and email me about them. We are usually getting up to hi-jinxes and all kinds of blog vomit stuff that infects their subconsciousness. We even bone! I always ask how I was.

Birds fly over the Raymbo why oh why can’t I?

I can clean up semi-nice. We were gonna go to Gusto but they were closed at eleven on a Monday. Wahh. Well I got to see a girlush get cuffed by an undercover popo then taken to the drunk tank in a cruiser. It was distressing to witness. I bet she learned a valuable lesson. Don’t get violent with cab drivers.


There’s my bun. @stevepella_hair is doing my hair again this week, we are rebuilding the colour. I think we might have an Andy Edie thing going on. Try him out at Head Candy he will treat you right and he does amazing hair extensions. Should I get some did? Before Aruba? Jamaica oooh I wanna take ya?

I like the ghost one.

I bet each one has a neat story behind it.

I feared MTV Creeps had ruined this dress for me. But then the reunion episode happened and I am less pissed off now so I took the legendary blue maxi dress™ out on the town for a spin like it was the Grammy’s and that is probably why we had to eat at bier markt cos I take so frig ass long.

Serious foodie trademark, no one puts their napkin on like a bib unless they were my grandfather at Sunday supper or a baby or a comedian, like-a moi.

Nose humour. It’s not a tumor! I don’t know what my problem is today. I HAVE SEVERAL!

Bunnies everywhere I look. I have some upcoming bunny news speaking of to share.

My hair was an interesting sculpture masterpiece yesterday.

I love love love that these are pink btw. Sugar beach is the best. The smell of sugar from redpath. Too bad white sugar is the devil.

Time to get that new ‘kini.

I love cute faces on dishware.


This is something I would say/do.

Leaving on a jet plane.

One is never enough.

Carrot apple ginger juice. I liked our waitress and felt a do-me vibe like she might want to do me and I liked also that she said she didn’t shower when I complimented her lipstick. Oh wait there she is in the BG with pigtails. I asked if she liked The Wizard of Oz cos of her Dorothy look. There was a Quebecois couple talking loudly and happily together all over the restaurant. It sounded pretty in my ears.

When directing the shot try not to look rtrd’d.

What’s uppppp. Okay I’ll chill on the pez shots.

An impromptu scoot out to here means your pants don’t match your top. Oh wait let me just try and find my give a care, I left it laying around somewhere here.

No bloat here which is funny cos at the time I felt like a whale. Body dysmorphia sucks.

Maybe if I stopped eating at Midnight things’d be cool. It’s family inherited I think. My uncs is a nighthawk right mom?

I love juice, juice loves me. La da da, dee dee dee. It’s gonna be a big hit.

I was able to name all the meats from knowledge and memory and maybe bullshit one of them.

Indy wrap-up to come. I have an audition to prepare for and a food tasting immediately afterward in the Annex then Rebeccablah‘s to catch Creeps on MTV and then a fashion show. Pray for Raymjo.

Raymbo Pride

Okay time to practice with these more. I’m only going to use 2 rods cos it will be lighter and I don’t need four, it’s impossible and no way the wing can flutter if a rod is in it plus I don’t want to poke anyone and there is a higher chance of that with 4. So catch us on Shasha’s float tomorrow, starts at 2pm. PUMPED. We have a hose to spray you down with if you get overheated and it’s infused with vanilla so smell like a bakery. GENIUS. It’s also time for a shower. Make sure to never leave a pet or a baby in a hot car when it’s like this okay thank you xoxo Raymbo :).

“Celebrate & Demonstrate! Voted Best Float @PrideToronto look for us at ‪#pride2012‬ on Sun. July 1″


I went to a party here years and years ago I never forgot it except I can’t remember which house it was exactly hehheh..

So I’m very fond of this bizarre corner. Biking through it at night, a hot summer one. 19 years old. Stupid and spectacular.

It was an out of the way place to party at the time.

TV pancake makeup.

Soccer traffic. Spain won.

I have papillon hair. I am down with that.

Game face on. Remember when I never smiled. I need to start up @raymisemo again haha. Maybe when goth has a revival, Emo will come shortly thereafter.

I like the vintage posters at legendary MTV studioland. We were sequestered in this room upstairs so as to keep us away from the finalists. We were loud as hell, it felt like highschool again and it was super fun. Give us vegetables and water and see what happens I guess.

Buh buh bam you betcha.

Beside me is a frickin’ ice cream fridge STOCKED. We were not allowed that either.

You can see part of my question haha.

Everything is working here ooh yes snaps.

Smell ya later Happy Saturday.

Winning is everything

Tell me what you thought it’s important!!! I will hate you forever if there is no comment here. How long is forever for? YOU WILL SOON FIND OUT LURKERS. Don’t allow jealousilence to overtake you it’s a bad look. You can even say something bad I don’t care. (I do! lots.) You can also comment on it on facebook too, fine. Kay see ya! Thank you!

Ok here are the fun questions I want answers for: Beckham or Wolverine? James Dean or George Clooney? Beyonce or Gaga? Spikes or Chains? Paul or John? Kanye or Jay-Z? Sick of that Gotye song yet? Would you dye your hair white? Wonder Woman or Shera? (I asked this one, she said Shera, I was shocked lol) Audrey Hepburn or Marilyn Monroe? Michelle Obama or Jackie O? What’s your favourite part about being Aliyah Jasmine?

Check it out bromances! :)

I want my MTV pilot right meow

Interview stance, calm cool, caj. I was nothing of the sort. I know I did better than the other two I think, but the task was for likeability so it doesn’t matter if I stumbled or knew how to talk no one needs to know how to talk anymore thanks to the internet. WRONG. It is harder but the more you do it the better you get but on top of that she has to of liked me, that was the challenge. I am also fucking dying out here trying to get a reaction from the Jersey Shore cast, they don’t count The Situation following me as enough. What are you kidding me that is HUGE!!!!!! That is a win he has a babillion followers and follows just over 1000. I am trying my brains out it is uber humiliating to harass them all one by one on twitter since Saturday. Today was cut off day but I threw one more at Sitch. I appealed to the business side of things and asked permission to link sitchnews on this blog. This is the hell I have been in lately. I also have to make a song about myself and put it to a 30 second track of STUPID FUCKING MUSIC ahaha yesterday at MTV I was like who wrote this? No answers. I can write charming blog posts but I cannot write songs. It’s go time though so I guess now I am a song writer. And I will not cheat either. I could get a hip hop lyricist friend to write it for me, that would be obvious right? Therefore it must suck and be apparent that Raymi wrote this shitty song now dance to it muthafucka! Update: Sitchnews retweeted this post. I hope I get a flood of blog traffic!

Cody is a nice kid though but I am so gonna smoke him sorry brah. You too Arber. I will save all of my opinions til after the episode which we shoot on Thursday. For some reason I blanked on that fact. Tonight I will be live tweeting Creeps, the final episode of the show.

Do you like my unassuming little outfit there? Who’s a genius oh I am. Cody thought I was 22, he was almost blown out of his chair next door at the pub where we went for a drink with his friend, I think they are twenty.

I was like no man I just turned 29. I downplayed how much I knew about twitter to both of those cats, sorry but it ain’t no cake walk. Thanks for the extension on my little Raymi rap video til Thursday morning otherwise I would have had to write it after the gala instead of being a lazy waste of space some more last night. Actually, this whole creeps thing is reminiscent of high school. I feel tethered to my homework assignments of tweet insanity feeling like I am about to fail at any and every juncture, there are a lot of stress eating days between Thursday and right meow as well. Ps. Lucky had just slapped my ass and I am saying Hiiiiiiiiiiii! at her here.

Hi Cody! I will let you and your friends hang out with me in Niagara Falls sometime (which is where he lives).

OH I haven’t even said who I interviewed yet on here, it was Aliyah Jasmine. I lurked her tumblr yesterday morning for two hours, pretty amazing life and she’s dating one of the guys from the Stereos. She’s done it all and is a hard working role model for the entire nation why couldn’t I be this smooth in the interview I dunno I am not smooth guy that is not my style I am a rocky road. I asked her how to be poised and smooth like her and she said vodka and I laughed and DID NOT SAY that I had helped myself to a glug of it before colleague picked my ass up to chauffeur me across town. #spoiled. Anyway, I went first and I hope they keep that in mind. I didn’t get to ask her my fun questions either boo. I will type them here now for you and you can be amazed by what could have been kay?

It’s blurry I like it. Here’s another “could have” if my stupid friend wasn’t so stupid.

This was just two days ago. Now the world is white and bleak looking. The sky is never grey, it’s white, anyway just saying you blew it for not hitting the roof Rebecca. I understand your cray friend was in town sorry. Ps. Aliyah asked if I said cray in real life and I was like yes. I asked her how cray Tom Cruise was and she flipped the question back on me and I was trapped, she also asked if I “partied hard” another trap. I said yes, duh.

I said Kanye West was a misunderstood genius. I pick and chose things at random from her tumblr (which you should follow btw) that popped up most, I dunno, I fucking sucked I am going to beat myself up about it for the rest of my life but the moral of the story is I sucked the least and that’s all that matters kids stick that one in your hat.

Ow that hurts right now even through a picture.

Stella loves it up there but she over-heated pretty quickly well, 15 minutes, not even.

My hair is pulling out some interesting looks lately. Interesting is the one universal inoffensive compliment/slight that there is. I put feather earrings on to complete the look. They feel like hair on your shoulders. On MY shoulders bro. I am a bro without a surfboard wahh haha. Hey remember when I said I would show you the questions I didn’t ask right? Yes I will get to that.

Oh look I made a feminist statement lol thanks Anna. I have a stack of Xtra’s on the living room floor teacher went out and grabbed some for me aw thanks sweetie pie. He texted “proud of you” baha thanks! Ps. I need to eat a plate of perogies now I missed out on those.

Here’s the original.

Here’s a different version. No regrets, tons!

Meowcifer. Ok here are some fun questions: Beckham or Wolverine? James Dean or George Clooney? Beyonce or Gaga? Spikes or Chains? Paul or John? Kanye or Jay-Z? Sick of that Gotye song yet? Would you dye your hair white? Wonder Woman or Shera? (I asked this one, she said Shera, I was shocked lol) Audrey Hepburn or Marilyn Monroe? Michelle Obama or Jackie O? What’s your favourite part about being Aliyah Jasmine? Can we go back in time please ahhhhhh. Whatever one guy “winged it” and we all know how those approaches pan out jajaja.

This was Rebecca’s favourite page out of the Jem colouring book because she is sleeping. Wow. What an unimaginative child ahahah I think I win for best and most burns most often in this friendship it’s what I am here for and she loves it.

We laughed at this photo when we saw it because we were white winosaurs. All of the funny and inappropriate things I said and did will come back to me when I blog all the shots, so far I only have Alyssa’s pics. We had our own paparazzi girl in tow, one who has gone through the Raymi Celebrity school of hard knocks, from gym ambassador to “other shit she does now” thanks to me.

See. Laughing hard. She reminds me of Sarah Jessica Parker in the Family Stone, all uptight and prim and proper. I want to borrow that dress Rebecca.

See I am multiplying. Sexy Litsa was at our table too she popped out a kid 14 months ago now look at her thinspiration incarnate. I have to go blow a fart on Stella’s belly now brb! Not! I mean, to the coming back, it’s toy story 3 xbox 360 time I’ll get the chips and gingerale see you on the couch.

OK lets take a burlesque break for a sec here.

I can’t look!

Here is how I took in the family’s second appearance on MTV Creeps.

We don’t get MTV at home so we went to Bechnique’s, teach met up as we were at the food (poisoning) awards gala ahah. Thankfully I was drinking dinner this night and was saved. I drink more in the winter (shut up mum) because I am a functioning depressive misanthrope creative type and in the summer I am a beacon of health and fitness. I likes ta keep it Johnny Depp. Bech said she barfed a bit though from the (can’t say it or there will be a lawsuit) _____, but I don’t believe people unless I see it I have very strict barf standards only because I am reduced to a shivering crying mess when I spew. I had a seizure as a toddler and ralphed (lauren!) all over the place and I think I am scarred from that.

Are you fuckin kidding me? They had to DIG for that one and they made it look like my vag is out on display, it’s in shadow you can’t see shit here and this was taken during one of those not even skinny periods where I was feeling flexible enough to be able to contort my body in a skinny enough way that was shareable. When is the last time I even showed my nipples here, couple months ago and even then it was one picture. At least show attractive ones why the garbage ones? There is no telling time online I suppose, I have eleven years of image damning stuff so why do I care? I don’t.

My hair was bananas this night. It always is!

Mom trust me I would have loved to take you to task a bit more (she said I was calm) but they script it, totally encourage freestyle banter but have already done their homework and pre-burns. It goes Nice nice MEAN MEAN MEAN MEAN MEAN kind of nice HUGE INSULT BURN DISS SLAP Nice and Bye!

ChiChi NO NO (yes real name) has balls sitting here when his body looks like the blankets sometimes she blinks and I jump out of my skin (I don’t know what she is and it’s too late to turn back now) because I didn’t even know she was sitting there it’s HALARIOUS.

Here is how I handle reality AS IN NOT ABLE TO AT ALL. Ha you can see what the other half of my freaking out face looks like in the mirror. I am too dramatic for this world.

I thought I was pretty awesome all in all but I still had to watch it through my fingers covering my eyes and hiding.

Except I had two people to worry about.

Sasha’s hot. Ok so now I hear that there will be quarter finals for MTV Creeps AND I AM IN THE RUNNING. Against Tommy Hollywood and Batman and whoever else. It’s for YOUR OWN PILOT. And seeing as I essentially pitched an entire tv show to them during my audition in the ten minutes I told my entire life story sprinkled in my Pitch, I am confident I have a good chance however, Hollywood also does cos he’s already got the ballin’ life style and mtv could just coat tail off of that. Oh man I am going to have to start some serious situation-level shit talking of my competitors pretty soon.

Toronto Batman brought this up on stage at Valentine Vamps and I was all Whaaaaaaaa???? On the mic too it was funny. No you’re funny. Hi. MOM WE MUST WIN. Start training, do push ups and sit in the hot tub more and be cray cray Tray Tray I’m sure it won’t be hard. Thank yew.

Then we got blind stankin’ drunk to celebrate. Huzzah!

Happy vday hangover. How many bad decisions got made last night mes amis? Brb with my makeup winner announcement!

Why are my legs and my torso facing opposite directions? BECAUSE I AM AN AMAZING CONTORTIONIST. Sorry I can’t stop yelling. Anyway we had a bath together yesterday (ew hehehh) and it’s truly incredible how flexible I can be. Teacher said the moral of every one of my stupid stories is I AM AWESOME. Well, yeah and?

Jam of the day!

Someone just said I got style on this video so that deserves a replay.

I can see myself in this video while videoing it which is why I am smiling and gooning over myself okay thanks very much!

Now here’s how it went down Tracey the Minx styles

For the American Little Raymis (and elsewhere, places like the moon or Germany) here is ma moms bein’ Creeped. I’ve still only been able to take this in in teeny partial doses with a hand over one of my eyes, it’s hard to watch yourself sometimes, I’m my own harshest critic and trust me I’ve no shortage of them when I decide to stop.


And to refresh you, here is my episode of creeps, profile two RAYMI THE MINX and the Final Decision clip where I win.