Window of Awesometunity

Toldja I’d do this! How I’ve wasted more of my Sunday. My arm is burning from colouring this and you can see how impatient I am. Look I have Louboutins and I added my nipple for the super fans. Hope you’re enjoying your Sunday Fundays it’s your turn to colour now (and do better). Also here’s one of few reasons why I love PC’s: Paint! If you find funny or dirty (or both) colouring book pictures to colour in send them to me or link in the vomments. LOVE YOU LONG TIME!

Smell ya later.

Foodie attitudey

Yesterday your fearless hero went to the zoo (where she belongs) for the annual Seafood for Thought eatathon. My third year in a row! I am a important people! Here’s last year’s post: Seafood? I see food I eat it. Funny how some people don’t know I’m “a foodie” yeah I’m all over the place I get that but it’s true, I have reviewed quite the amount of restaurants over the years so I kinda know what I’m talking and eating about.

Tickets to the rain ball and man, did it ever rain.

As you can see it was quite summery weather save for the monsoon so we dressed appropriately & although it Noah’s Ark dumped forty days forty nights style, it was still hot out.

Too hot for a bra even so I Sharon Stoner’d it.

A taste of what was to come except we did not taste Stingraymis™ as they are not for eating but for petting only. They are scary looking things and I was most brave this year thanks to Rebecca’s fearlessness rubbing off on me. She grabbed this one shark and held on for awhile so I copied that. It was a lot of fun. We got soaked again. If the rain won’t get you the stingrays will.

Colleague, ever the s-disturber, told me some women were giving me major stink eye when we passed because of my outfit. Well I’m sorry it’s summer ladies. I’m sure you watch all kinds of sluttily dressed shows and read celeb gossip mags where they are dressed hotter than me and you don’t think twice about it.

Line skipping. Baby doesn’t wait in lines.

Rebecca said we matched (cos of my camel toe) she burned me many times on that and I fell in to the trap each time. I can’t help how these shorts were designed, they’re Bettie Page and since high-waisted 50’s technology has not been advanced to avoid c-toe, don’t blame me.

She wore those earrings in honour of Lady G.

Ferret Bueller.

Act natural everybody!

I did not touch it. I didn’t see the point. It was grooming itself anyway.

This chick is from the old neighbourhood, was nice running in to her hi Jenn! Oh I got stories lol.

Woah easy neck veins!

Wine me up. I wish Cheese Boutique‘s tent was attached to this one during the downpour which turned me in to a sucky pants. I am scared of thunder and lightning. Laugh all you want I have sensitivities. I deal.

First thing in my mouth was yummy ceviche. Can you remember what Raymbecca? If there’s no picture of the resto to go along with then my photographic memory can only go so far.

What kind of fish is this?

But of course.

I rule therefore I am.

Hello old friend.

We had moments to choose where to find shelter not wanting to accept that it was actually going to happen. Self-delusion is one of my strongest skills.

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Ms. Mia Wallace is the best! Best discounts and on the best quality toys for girls and boys. Get your MIA for 40% off – $47 reg price $79 this is a powerful gal and a good time you betcha I look forward to our summer together lol.

There she is!

And if the sight of PCs make you puke here is a mac!

Perverts’ comment beneath this pic on my flickr: “love a hot women that comes prepared!” also is that british currency. Exxxtra sexy.

Oh my god so many lipsticks!

So cute! Okay bye TGIFME!

Experience reviewer of the personal kind

Well mes amis, the family camera has been retrieved and now we may peep the evidence of last week’s bender known as NXNE. I feel like I barely did anything (aside from the parties) and yet this camera shows otherwise. Time and distance heals all. I completely forgot about this third-world toilet down in Tim‘s basement that the smart (or stupid) party people discovered and queued up for during the epic annual 159 Manning booze, bands, and bbq party Tim throws. Lets start at the beginning shall we then?

The smell of hot corn blanketed the kitchen and your body as you passed through it. The second we arrived I was compliment-attacked standing right beside one of the bubbling broiling pots about my dress and how pretty I looked. AW god bless hippie drunk hipster chicks! Had I not started drinking loads earlier I would have had better-equipped social skills to defend my it-girl shyness honour. Sometimes Torontonians are not social, they just aren’t, right? Also guys who fancy themselves big deals I find clam up a little bit.

Now Tim’s got a home to photograph and if The Selby is still at it then ding dong, we’re here.

Any guy with collectibles who throws a rager for stranger hipsters with so much fucking trust and honour or whatever is a nice guy. I bet he hid his best taxidermied posed squirrels though, he’s not stupid.

He’s also on my business card only because he just happened to be standing beside me during my gorgeous d-ball throw. I said yeah I can’t really throw these things and he goes yeah me either lol. I just liked that Strombo asked why Tim was wearing jeans when I tweeted it.

I gave him a stack for his collection of Timisms. By request!

It was a makeup melter that’s for sure though these last few heatwave days make that seem like a cakewalk now. Easy peasy.

Jam time with ShellShag and ps. Here is an actual rock review of all the bands and acts that played. I’m more of an EXPERIENCE reviewer of the personal kind. Ooh I smell a good blog title.

It makes me happy to see the CN Tower at a party in my line of sight it makes me feel on top of the world or more connected to my roots, my planet. It makes me feel more human than human. Shut up!

I was “too cool” to go up to Chris “the sloan guy” but I liked that he checked me out in my dress. I tell ya girls, white clothing makes people associate you as a delicate little princess flower if you can manage to not drink red wine or be a slob for a night it is worth all the attention you’re gonna get. Raymi Tip!

Oh hello risky business buddy. Bech & Teach wear the exact same glasses. I think it’s cute.

Sweet ampage.

They’re from BK.

I was gonna give the chick a doob as we were leaving cos they’re from out of town (was my logic) but I didn’t want to get stuck in a conversation so I didn’t and now I wish that I did. Meh.

Having a breastie you can communicate together telepathically with at parties so as not to show who you are making fun of or raising eyebrows at and freezing your face so they know to look over there is awesome. Don’t give me grief either because everybody does it and it’s not mean making fun of it’s just party shenans spectating. How many people do you think made fun of me that day for wearing that dress? It happens.

If you can’t laugh at yourself for shit like this then you’re taking yourself way too seriously. Instrument pyramids are an end-of-set rule to be made in to law if you’re going to be playing outdoors.

But if you’re a kazoo player I guess you’re SOL.


Hi Onizzler! Great givin’er with ya.

JULES! So bummed for you kid that someone ripped your iphone right out of your freaking hand. They’ll have bad shit befall them no doubt for living like a jerk-ass like that. Crime doesn’t pay!

I was pissed at myself for wearing my mary jane wedges and I blame Lauzzie cos she was going to wear wedges and Betty&Veronia Laurens™ have to be the same height at all times.


Now time for some Buck 65.

Time for pig.

The guy can rippity rap and beatbox, lyricist genius for sure.

Party packed but moveable.

Hey who’s your friend. Also note that guy’s epic accusatory storytelling face ahaha.

Vamp it up.

Where Lady Garbage is now :( RIP Kitten baby darling. Sigh.
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Father’s Day special

This one’s for you, Duncs!

Pretty sick!!

Instakilt was a great hit! Dead Brilliant. Got ‘em a Rob Roy red and a Gaelic green. You’re set for summer with the best beach towels ever now. Looking forward to catching them on Dragon’s Den this fall, Derek‘s always good for a laugh and definitely will be good tv.

I think Shawn kept the red, it makes most sense I think if he’s out on the town, our little tastemaker oot there. I love the cheeky quips all over Instakilt’s website too.

Suits the gals too and they’ve also got smaller ones for the bairns/wees aw bless.

They also look grand just settin’ there on a date with me vest, ya.

Hailey got my hippie overalls. I never had the balls to wear them in public.

Pretty pretty.

Hello my Rocky.

This claymore I bought in Quebec matches your new dress kilt perfectly dad.

And your key chain too.

Alright alright we get the point.

And that’s that.

This heatwave, right?

Watch this baked

We were drunk off that rum chocolate ice cream milkshake and waiting for our burgers. This was the day everyone told me I was beautiful on our short excursion out, it was cray! You can see my minx nail makeover too.