Muh-om! I like this better in colour why do you have to go all Tracey pizazzle on it for? Email me the orig please raymitheminxATgmail.com thanks.
Beautiful night much. Two moons in one night. Baha couldn’t resist.
Do you think I am going to pull a Susan Sarandon and not pose with these mini babes? Do I look like I am crying inside AHAHA. Whatever, the more famous you become the less your age matters because notoriety provides relief as long as I don’t turn in to a potato just yet. I will admit I look tireder than normal here, it happens.
Or I can just jump in between these two. Likewise, take a page from the Tracey Chronicles and limelight it to middle age myself. It’s not Pride and Prej. times anymo folks. Anyone who even deigns to make age wisecracks is stupes anyway, plus jealous. I have spent 12 years amassing my seniority you don’t just start a tumblr and become a scene-ior. Ha I am going to tweet that. And while I do notice the younger ones who jock me, I ain’ts stupid. You know that I know what’s up. Read the three letter word url you are parked on right now, that is who I am after all.
Lois was bigging me up to this lady from the Netherlands or something, I love when Lois warms up my audience then I take a big Lebowski swig of my drank and step in for the grand finale. She was talking about the Toronto shooting I think or some other lady who looked like her was and I was like no thanks. You don’t exactly set out to tell your life story to strangers all the time but after they watch us mess around and catch each other up on our lives and take photos, drown one another, their curiosity just can’t handle it any longer and they have to ask you what the f-k is going on.
Talking is just as distracting as changing the radio station while driving, the drama steers the car’s wheel with those two. I said to Steve yesterday that I bet when compact disc players were the thing there were totally Dateline NBC and 20/20 scare-terror for ratings reports on music causing collisions and such. Basically just be afraid of everything, make everything illegal and call it a day. Anyway, Lois and Tracey are just too unreal when they drive to and fro TDot. I say no more, otherwise ah lose ma f-ing mind about it!!!
I dare you to drown on my watch. You’d do it too just to get mouth-to-mouth with me I bet. I do possess lifeguard saving CPR skills and all that jazz. Maybes a little rusty though, okay I poke you where? *slams on your chest* bahha.
I wonder when Tray will load up youtube with her vids. She is in to that as well. Incriminating material or not, she is in to it. Always watch everything you do or say around her, she is worse than I am.
This picture would rule if it wasn’t so distorted from FB muth-er.
Lois told me to F the B here cos of the Aruba one. I love how Lois gets out all her little demons passive aggressively like that it’s so cute and I don’t mind at all being the conduit either. Love my LoLo. I like pissing off my mom too and she likes it, it’s disturbing! Lol.
I love this shot mom. Hailey and her buddy spent the week together doing all kinds of things I think that’s great! They go to different schools and are both going in to high school this year. Rocky seen here, kept it real.
I really liked Hailey’s friend’s hair. I have never had wildly dyed hair now that I think of it. I “missed out” oh well. I think I am wild enough though and I’d feel too crazy with kool-aid hair.
Steve’s new murse is the best he loves it so much I am so happy for him and you know what, black was the best colour after all. Tarek is a wizard. Steve is a wizard. They are both wizards. It’s good to keep ties with wizards. If you dudes want to flex your metro-sexuality a little bit too please peruse the NB Man section of Nella Bella I can’t believe I am dating a stylish modelesque dude come to life, I took some photos of him in the parking garage yesterday carrying it and was like wow, simply, wow. The way he held the bag like it wasn’t at all non-masculine. He even carried the blue/green Riviera clutch yesterday for me on our lover’s walk. Aw. I was like stop people are staring, he rocked it even harder. He had a RUN DMC kinda vibe going down so it worked.
I think Hailey is more graceful than I am, mom says she is very ladylike and fem, plus took ballet.
I’ve seen one of her performances before I was impressed and she was so young.
I thought I was going to be a-scared of being on a vespa. My ex had a Triumph crotch rocket and I loved that at first but then I got fat and nervous and once he had the cow he didn’t have to take it for motorcycle rides anymore (I hope you are appreciating the imagery here) but anyway, the fear is gone Tommy Chong! I love that shit. I bet colleague is pissed cos I talked him out of getting one because I was secretly (and vocally) afraid of being on one, plus my hair and makeup would be a wreck by the time we got to the gig.
My first time at Sadie’s diner. They are liquor licenseless but that’s a good thing for a floozy boozy like me. A mimosa would have hit the spot though.
This post is going to be ridinkulously non-sensical and time disjointed because that’s how I uploaded everything and who’s to lie, how I live too. I just realized the weekend was over. It’s Tuesday. I learn lessons on Monday nights when I venture out to eat and all the kitchens are closed. If you could give me a list of late night foodie kitchens that are open that would be awesome. I’m on west coast time haha. I am the future and the past. This podcast is typed.
This airs tonight! Why they said the eleventh in the email about it I do not know but today is not the eleventh right? How can I get better at managing my time schedule if other people keep fucking it up for me too thanks MTV! Finale Creeps episode is tonight at 9:30 Canadur!! Sorry America, you will have to wait. Or move here. Do you like ketchup chips?
Pulled out my red wrapped mini-belt bracelet from F21. Bought one for my niece too.
Somewhere over the Raymbo way up high there’s a blog that I heard of once in a lullaby. FACT. People periodically and frequently have dreams about me and email me about them. We are usually getting up to hi-jinxes and all kinds of blog vomit stuff that infects their subconsciousness. We even bone! I always ask how I was.
Birds fly over the Raymbo why oh why can’t I?
I can clean up semi-nice. We were gonna go to Gusto but they were closed at eleven on a Monday. Wahh. Well I got to see a girlush get cuffed by an undercover popo then taken to the drunk tank in a cruiser. It was distressing to witness. I bet she learned a valuable lesson. Don’t get violent with cab drivers.
There’s my bun. @stevepella_hair is doing my hair again this week, we are rebuilding the colour. I think we might have an Andy Edie thing going on. Try him out at Head Candy he will treat you right and he does amazing hair extensions. Should I get some did? Before Aruba? Jamaica oooh I wanna take ya?
I like the ghost one.
I bet each one has a neat story behind it.
I feared MTV Creeps had ruined this dress for me. But then the reunion episode happened and I am less pissed off now so I took the legendary blue maxi dress™ out on the town for a spin like it was the Grammy’s and that is probably why we had to eat at bier markt cos I take so frig ass long.
Serious foodie trademark, no one puts their napkin on like a bib unless they were my grandfather at Sunday supper or a baby or a comedian, like-a moi.
Nose humour. It’s not a tumor! I don’t know what my problem is today. I HAVE SEVERAL!
Bunnies everywhere I look. I have some upcoming bunny news speaking of to share.
My hair was an interesting sculpture masterpiece yesterday.
I love love love that these are pink btw. Sugar beach is the best. The smell of sugar from redpath. Too bad white sugar is the devil.
Time to get that new ‘kini.
I love cute faces on dishware.
I FINALLY FEEL LIKE I BELONG.
This is something I would say/do.
Leaving on a jet plane.
One is never enough.
Carrot apple ginger juice. I liked our waitress and felt a do-me vibe like she might want to do me and I liked also that she said she didn’t shower when I complimented her lipstick. Oh wait there she is in the BG with pigtails. I asked if she liked The Wizard of Oz cos of her Dorothy look. There was a Quebecois couple talking loudly and happily together all over the restaurant. It sounded pretty in my ears.
When directing the shot try not to look rtrd’d.
What’s uppppp. Okay I’ll chill on the pez shots.
An impromptu scoot out to here means your pants don’t match your top. Oh wait let me just try and find my give a care, I left it laying around somewhere here.
No bloat here which is funny cos at the time I felt like a whale. Body dysmorphia sucks.
Maybe if I stopped eating at Midnight things’d be cool. It’s family inherited I think. My uncs is a nighthawk right mom?
I love juice, juice loves me. La da da, dee dee dee. It’s gonna be a big hit.
I was able to name all the meats from knowledge and memory and maybe bullshit one of them.
Indy wrap-up to come. I have an audition to prepare for and a food tasting immediately afterward in the Annex then Rebeccablah‘s to catch Creeps on MTV and then a fashion show. Pray for Raymjo.
Tell me what you thought it’s important!!! I will hate you forever if there is no comment here. How long is forever for? YOU WILL SOON FIND OUT LURKERS. Don’t allow jealousilence to overtake you it’s a bad look. You can even say something bad I don’t care. (I do! lots.) You can also comment on it on facebook too, fine. Kay see ya! Thank you!
Ok here are the fun questions I want answers for: Beckham or Wolverine? James Dean or George Clooney? Beyonce or Gaga? Spikes or Chains? Paul or John? Kanye or Jay-Z? Sick of that Gotye song yet? Would you dye your hair white? Wonder Woman or Shera? (I asked this one, she said Shera, I was shocked lol) Audrey Hepburn or Marilyn Monroe? Michelle Obama or Jackie O? What’s your favourite part about being Aliyah Jasmine?
I am never giving up these pants. NEVER. This is my contribution to punk. Look how long my leg is by the way. Raymi long legs. People fear me like spiders so it makes sense.
I had to go over to stupid’s house last night to watch tv because we don’t get mtv here and while we typically order or stream shows online after the fact to get my mtv fill that is not conducive to live tweeting a program therefore to stupid’s house I go.
See THIS is how you watch tv thank god for me showing you how it’s done.
Dear rich people corporations one day when you give me a bigger budget you can see pictures of us watching a tv maybe three times the size as this one boy how am I even able to work under these circumstances? Luckily the two other guys up against me seem like ignoramus’s with no twitter followings so hopefully it was a set up for me to win. No contest. The other other two tasks have me way more nervous though. I have never been nervous to watch tv before however, that was a bizarre feeling. Oh no what if I am stupid? I am so stupid! Who are these kids and why do the three girls all look exactly the same? That is what old people sounded like when mtv was first invented I am sure. Oh right, the show I’m talking about is punk’d and if you just lurk my twitter @raymitheminx you can read and follow it all from last night’s challenge. One of the official punk’d twitter accounts favorited a tweet of mine so that’s a win.
Ooh that’s a bad hunch. Bad bad girl. Very bad.
I took 20 pictures of this. You need more mirrors or a full length to capture more of the awesome.
I am digging this sweater more and more I am wearing it again right now. Cozy. You can get one from 3F, quite affordablah.
Look more eye makeup. I think if you make a heavier lid it makes them pop more and distracts from the sunken crevices what are my under eyes.
That’s me as Jenny McCarthy. Just kidding she is so cheeseballs. Whatever like I’m Isaac Newton. Did you know “Newton was also highly religious. He was an unorthodox Christian, and wrote more on Biblical hermeneutics and occult studies than on the subjects of science and mathematics.” No wikipedia, I did not know that. Occult you say? Interesting.
Come on. You call this a picture? You may as well be across the street.
Shut up I’m working!
No regrets. Tons. Lol. Do you know how many times people ask me that in interviews? You are forcing me to screw with you more now. Yes I do have regrets. That I never learned to tie my shoes. Actually now that I mention it I was a late adopter to that particular technology. Special. You betcha.
I am the last person on the planet who uses a PC right. I just like the shit that I like lay off me! I want an iphone so I can instagram GO FUCK YOURSELF to everybody over there. No just kidding so I can talk to other hipsters. And play angry birds. But why can’t they make an iphone exactly like a blackberry, one with a keyboard. Jules gets glass in her fingers from the smashed screen. Cool safe. They aren’t durable. I put my last blackberry through the ringer, dropped it infinity times, used the battery to the max overheated it like cray like it was about to fucking explode and it still worked. It still works today I have no idea where it is it should be put in a goddamn museum that little sucker, copy and pasting the letter e and number 2, how I do not miss you at all and now I think I’d rather incinerate it because it brought me so much rage, much as PC’s are wont to do but they have ms paint and simpler functions. I am not a mind reader I wasn’t born knowing cntrl apple something c v whatever my learning curve can only go so far because that is all I will allow it. I still know people who refuse to go on twitter. I think I am doing pretty good here. I think this defensive requisite I’m PC rant shall suffice. But don’t you think it makes sense that I am team blackberry and PC? When you really think about it (if you have enough time to I mean you are probably busy sorry to bother you) anyway, I love Macs too but I’d rather date someone who has one and have my PC and have the best of both worlds.
Oh wait I have a present for you.
My favourite meme. I bet my dad has no idea what that means. Instagram I mean. I meme. Hi dad I miss you! I read a chapter of Roger’s book today because the power was out. Not bad.
Rebecca put these on and pretended to be our therapist. I tried to have a fight with her about saying she knows more about food than I do. I am going to compile a list of every single restaurant I’ve reviewed and dump them on her fucking head!
One of our view’s from living room Romeo and Juliet balcony hope I don’t fall out of that one day I am stupid enough for it to happen that’s for sure. ‘Sup naybes!
What is this Japan why are you on my potato vodka? And why is Kevin Smith being such a whiner right now by the way? Someone sounds like they want to be Bruce Willis. If someone is emo IT IS BECAUSE THEY ARE SAD YOU FUCKING ASSCLOWN. I never thought K Smith was funny and I never will and now I am continuing my invented feud with him. Clerks? Most pretentious boring pile of over-hyped crap ever. I will give you Jay and Silent Bob Strike back but the silent thing died with Andy Kaufman so chill on that character bro.
Dance karate. Remind me to upload the videos of you demonstrating a choke hold and a kick on/with me.
I don’t remember seeing this thank god for these pictures I clearly missed out.
Rebecca texts me her zit healing progress. Seriously. She had a bullet hole one on her forehead I pointed out yesterday, today she said it fell off too. Thank you.
How did I miss these before? Where am I? We share her camera and I guess I didn’t transfer them. See how much I am the underdog now, I am faxing this blog post in.
Smile Time Station this is my stop!
I like this hoodie because I feel like it makes me look like I have my shit together, like a normal, ordinary, suburban lets go for a hike chick. Also it is still fresh and new looking. I wear it for very short periods of time never. Here is the first time I wore it.
I was going to do this again and I will and you will like it. O_O.
Soon those crappy dead trees will be tossed and I will have new tropical plants again. Probably the same ones. I still want them for free though so give me some tropical plants now thanks. Maybe a vine too, turn that wall in to a frigging jungle backdrop which will look fresh and dope for my spring break videos up there.
It’s a nice fitted hoodie, I got it as a gift from Style Exchange. VIPLEASE me! I want more from them gimme gimme. My tickle trunk is just a pile of clothes on the floor I keep meaning to sort it but I never want to. It’s just boring but I will do it and photograph all the crap I’m getting rid of and you can claim it for something to wear when you express your lonerisms alone at night during “you time” in the mirror drawing lipstick all over your face or something lol. I submitted lonerisms to urban dictionary years ago. REJECTED.
Cowabunga. The umbrella is dismantled because of the windy night (lots of those lately) blew it over. Teacher was like the wind blew over the umbrella can you believe that? Uh yes I can what’s so surprising about that? The guy has umbrella phobia probably because an umbrella hit him in the head and concussed him, but it wasn’t any old umbrella oh no, it was a Starbucks umbrella. They gave him a settlement, pretty stingy if you ask me. He should also get coffee for life too. But anyway have you seen what those things look like now? They’re three pointed modernly designed impalements waiting to happen and now I am umbrella paranoid too oh great if you see me jogging by you having a coffee in Liberty Village you know why.
It’s not NSFW if it’s fashion right.
In those other pics where Jules is covering my little friends Rebecca said I couldn’t even find your tits. Enigma out!
No wait one more thing this made the rounds yesterday so my american readers can better understand the country I am from. I kinda skimmed it but I can only imagine that it is pretty much probably exactly true and if you are offended GOOD.
I have no idea what is said or goes down so, let me know the highlights I got shit to do haha. Oh mom.
Should have brought two bottles of champagne.
This has been on my fridge for weeeeeks.
Wore my Valentine K sweater!
My summary about the next episode of Creeps is, my mom was shocked by how calm I was because normally I am screaming and swearing at her (she winds me up) but I was like mom, it’s scripted, we take turns, tv shows have organization behind them despite how messy they can sometimes appear. Also they talk in your ear to try to get you to goad the contestant, it’s funny, and I tried to be a talk hog as much as I could but I also felt like I got my moment on the last episode. My mom wishes she was feistier, I think she stands her ground pretty firm and looks hot too. It’ll be a fun show to watch and cringe. Hoping to get our clips for my blob for everyone to see.
My friend is wrapping up a class this week he’s teaching (no it’s not my bf lol) on the internet or digital whateverthefuck and naturally needed to ask an actual success story (those who can, do and those who can’t, teach classes about it at Sheridan I guess) so he emailed me last night and I was all ok remind me in the morning or it goes in to a black(berry) hole of forget. So without further ado, here is some garbage I just wrote that he will re-work in to a teachery-like offering of in the form of wisdom, Raymi style. (I know how you like to read and all).
Don’t say anything you cant take back. always think before engaging in a flamewar (in the future they will probably be illegal or have stronger repercussions for trolling) day time traffic is valuable so sacrifice your social life when you can to drive that traffic to your blog/social media/anything. Be patient, be original and funny, but dont try too hard. Learn about spin doctoring and do that like a pro. And anyone IRL who brings you down for your little projects ie blog, take no heed and keep on truckin because you will succeed. You are no one these days if you don’t have an online presence, how do you expect to get free things or get in to places? You can use a blog as a media passport in to all your cool favourite things if you work it right. Whether you buy in to celebrity or not, following the celebrity recipe for blogging (the full polished product, including you)(aka DON’T BE A SLOB HOW YOU LOOK MATTERS SO DEAL WITH IT ACCORDINGLY) you will go far. Give the people what they want, they want to be inspired, they want a leader, someone larger than life. Things don’t exist until they’re invented so get going! People don’t care anymore so you have to make them care. Just read my blog and take cues from that and call anytime.
Someone f’d with my livelihood today and emailed a client maliciously and LIED about me. Is that wrong? What do you think of that? A TROLL. Someone not in the real world at all, a hater reader stalker liar! I am in shock still. Disgusted and helpless. Do you think me using my body in business warrants a witch hunt? I don’t care what you say that is at the very root of every raymi whiner’s issue. I work my balls off. I have integrity. Deigning to go so far as that is disgusting. Like Eyeborg said, in life when I am dealt a bad hand I just play better. Thank you for lighting a fire under my ass. I am talking at shesconnected.com on friday at 1.45PM: MORE INFO HERE come witness my Jerry Maguire mission statement moment of insanity in time and get a sampling of my legacy. MOM & LOIS REGISTER HERE.