Author Archives: raymi

Unrequit this.

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Hi Raymwatch. Instead of moving forward in life, today I have decided to take it a step back or few and check out some #TBT Throwbacks because I don’t know what the future holds and I don’t care at the mo. I know that I’ve done a lot of out there stuff in my time and sometimes fail to give it the recognition it deserves due to whackloads of cyber bullying making fun of my performance art (burlesque) but now that I have been taking in some of my past exploits I am impressed, suffice it to say. That wow I did that.

Even though I blind myself in the eye in the end, emulating the scene from National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation in the same (more or less) red bathingsuit with Hawaiian flowers thrown in to marry it all together was pretty epic…blah blah blah watch. I am kind of going through a body fitness obsession phase right now so maybe I am taken by that? Like don’t fuck it up again this time kid. My goal is totake on the world with my body and mind. But mostly body. If I could call myself Raymi the Body from now on, I would. Someone is already called “The Body” though, and she’s awesome (scary).

I made these videos all the time because I was too shy to dance out in public because no one dances in Toronto but I have this burning desire to dance and these youtube videos were how I did it. Plain as day sober. Alone. Like a hamster in its cage? Some became pretty viral too. The rest of this post will be pictures. This video is from 2008. OLD.

Okay well one more can’t hurt :).

At the end of this night, some girls dressed up in my tickle trunk costumes and one uses a picture of her in this with me in it on her dating profile. I don’t know why I love that so much? It’s ridiculous probably. That a guy on the internet who reads my blog told me about it cos he saw it there but knew I wasn’t dating. I am turning into an easter egg.

Oh and I am gonna be the next ass person too that is also one of my crazy goals. I am going to also chisel out space in my repertoire for my ultimate sights which are set to be Chelsea Handler. I’ll have to start drinking way more though. But back to ass, if you don’t believe it check my instagram I am doing daily badonks and it’s probably nsfw. Three crappy words of life: Not Allowed To. I woke up, smelled the coffee and realised I was allowed to do this. So I am doing it. Ps. this pic was in Miami, we had an awesome time.

Life as a blonde was interesting. I did not achieve my goal with it which was to be Holly Madison and after MTV Creeps I wanted to distance myself so I changed my hair and never spoke of all the awful things I wanted to say about them and went Jean Grey.

Aw Papa. I am going as Nana’s date tomorrow in your stead. We love and miss you so much. This was my brother’s 30th birthday jam that I decorated the house like a carousel for him as a surprise, he was touched. So I have turned 28 by this point. He and my ex got loaded on flavoured vodka and I depsised them ahhaha.

Then I was on another dating show and the secret is we were already dating. He curled my hair that morning of taping and actually dropped me off too. lol sorry. That’s why I was so awkward cos I was afraid of how he would act, yet he was brilliant. I was the one who got made fun of bahaha.

Christine is an awesome blogger too who is traveling the world. Too bad we didn’t meet up in Germany! Me wearing this little onesie (my niece now has) was a big deal cos I was on my way to getting skinny and it was my first tiny outfit that I felt uncomfortable in all night long wearing, but everyone gawked in a good way. I try not to dress like an idiot as much anymore but it happens. Speaking of throwback this was a throwback party.

Met a hot doctor this night and I danced with Dennis Rodman. Ft Lauderdale baby. Still get their emails and they make me sad.

We didn’t fight the whole time. you don’t fight in Paradise. But I strangled her at the airport and made her delete all my evidence. God the stories I’m gonna tell one day when I’m a shriveled up extra from the movie Cocoon.

I am glad this feature film I starred in never saw the light of day. The stills are good enough for me.

I am glad this picture of me exists. I am hokey, what can I say. It worked for Mr. Dressup.

Melucas were spinning at Salvador Darling, Clem got us a limo and we surprised them after my headlining show at tattoo. That was an epic performance too. Don’t worry. I’ll do an act someday again. #bucketlists Also note my arm pre-minx tattoo but the burn mark (jerk chicken bbq) is there, which is why I got the tattoo.

Biked over to another old pocket of my past life to gibson Showroom one night alone and saw many many many (friendly) ghosts of back then, it was a bit much. I tried to be invisible. My eyes were watering the entire time because it was late in the summer, my allergies. God what a fool haha but here is a picture that it ever happened.

I wannabe Katy Perry too.

This is one of my favourite pictures. I was feeling really conceited and pretty and in love this night and so I wanted a nice picture but NOPE. Friends weren’t having it. COOL THANKS!

I love this picture too. What’s up O’Nizz!

Team yay cray at the nxne party. Ok i have to go to more music parties again because I get to see my old friends and by old friends I mean important people who fan girl my blog and tell me stories about Woody harrelson all night. Put me on your guestlist fuck sake raymiATraymitheminx.com and I am looking at you TIFF parties.

Another NXNE party night the next night. Hi Casie! ILU

Awesome bloggers know how to work together too. Sometimes. This was one of those times! Do you wanna see the video? An old friend of mine talked to me about it last night. Small worlds always, no?

My eyes watered all day long this day too ughh.

As for Jules she went back to school in San Fran and is dating some hot hippie bro now. Righteous. Miss you babe.

Bechnique is expecting a little boy! She’s somewhere in the states? Happy for you!

Reading up on one of my cyber besties at the shoe, just a typical Tuesday night.

Being skinny and hot and depressed at Emmas.

Haha those overalls.

I got that weird virus on NYE and lost like 7lbs, when I was already really skinny to begin with. there’s a blog post about that night if you were keen.

Had some interesting outfits for around Burlingtron.

I moved back to Toronto not long after this.

There are only so many times you can go bowling. Or are there?

Which brings us to nowadays. Do you think I should keep on keeping on? Thanks much obliged for checking out TBT with me.

Body like the summer

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I muchly enjoyed my tan this day plus life in general and thought lets immortalize this moment. Wouldn’t you know it someone else felt the same.

My hair looks awesome too so that is good.

Sunday night sorbet. Melty and spit-like. Gelato place was closed. Closed ghost town city so ventured back to eat this jive. I think that I am finally starting to go stir crazy from Burlingtron.

When I moved out here two autumns ago, I was about to say last autumn but I forgot I was away in Holland for 3 months and was travelling pretty much for all of 2013 so it erased that year from memory, but anyway this was a dress I bought and wore out only once because I was beginning to gain weight. Break up, moved to Burlington depression weight. Then I wore it at work as a shirt about a month ago and then once before that in the winter (when it was still pretty tight on my sausage fat upper arms) but now I am delighted to report the story of this size small (from UO) dress that I can wear all Risky Business styles again and still acts as a shift with pockets of space and I think my face looks pretty psyched too. My date had also just arrived at the moment of this mirror selfie.

This post is going to be girly and Raymicentric so be forewarned before reading on.

Heard from an old(er) friend yesterday who said I was still a baby so that was nice. It’s true though I guess. The only difference between me and hot looking youths is years of accrued experience, knowledge, expertise and maturity (ha) in the form of if not now when? Why have I been blogging for all of these years, what drives and compels me to do so? Has anyone ever stopped to ask me that, probably in a manner of ways but why do I breathe more unicorn power dust into RTM when she seems to be dying and then is brought back to life again. Why did I do that? Why does anyone blog, what does it all meeeeeeeean man? More marketing sponsorships, to be cutting edge, to be THE NEXT? Well yeah I think quietly I have always set goals, blown them, and gotten back on the horse again to be like you know what world there are many small achievements on the way and do not forget about me.

Do you know how many people call me crazy like, all the time and in a mean way too? Okay maybe like one person, who in turn is also crazy. But when people repeat offense, you take note and it becomes more about them then it does you.

But do I think I am insane? Yeah but not really you know what I mean? Like, what the fuck do I care what you think, or they say? I know that normies can and never will be able to take me but they like to watch me and there is something to that – it’s my casual goal to do something with that and that’s about it, consider yourself informed.

A superfollower told me to bust out this bathingsuit and I was like yeah great idea. Part of my goal (secrets to success, I hope) is to get psychotically in shape like lady gaga in the telephone video because I am not stupid to think that how I look isn’t part of this. My hair isn’t destroyed platinum blond anymore which was when I last had my figure. I’m not jolly just slightly overweight smiling like it doesn’t bother me plump anymore. I feel like the world is caving in on me and it’s my last chance to really give’r you know? If not now when. The second driving mantra of my “plan” essentially is get on board or out of my way. Too many times in my life I have been silenced and quashed into a fraction of what I truly am and thrive to be because yes, I come with a lot of noise. But I know that it’s empowering and inspiring and just as it gets good it always usually seems to get fucked up for some reason or other and what I am wondering is why am I so afraid all the time and why don’t I just keep going otherwise, why all this blog? Basically, fuck yeah blogging is what I am saying.

I’m also very inspired by my blogging sister peers who have risen like Phoenixes to the top over the years too. I see you. :) Oh god this is turning Spice Girls.

This is my tomb raider running outfit. If you ever had a shadow of a doubt about my mental atrocities you would just have to see me run. I am not going to humble brag here I am just going to say that I run like a gazelle if a gazelle were a ballerina who also dabbled in salsa merengue hip hop and freestyle. Cars follow along slowly and then circle back for more. Running mid-rain is awesome because I can do it alone. I took dance for 10 years so it’s in me to move and I was asked why I dance so well recently and how, because it is a fine skill. I don’t even care how much of a dick I sound like right now, it’s a dance off. I watched Magic Mike last night and seeing that guy move I was like, I can move like that but the world is so conservative HOW can I move like that and make money from it with all of my clothes on? This is the numero uno actual goal I have from running and dance-running fitness. I am going to film a dance video in a studio and prove it to you and then you can be the judge and then I can be a youtube celebrity with all the comments set to off ha ha.

I am addicted to running because it shuts everything out. I get results. I am hyper-active and it’s something to do. Everyone has their thing. Before my accident in Aruba I was running often and now it’s like that injury never occurred I can run like I used to but now I am more cautious. I’ll have to join a gym in the winter.

I was worried about the zipper on these pants this day. They are from Benetton in Aruba from our friend who I snake charmed the crap out of. He owns the benetton and half the island and I said send me a wardrobe much to the dismay of all the ladies I was with well guess what, I have a nice red winter coat and sexy slacks plus other things now lol. I suppose I’ll have to add a non-sexual hustling chapter to my book.

So much symbology!! Lol.

Subject change!

Just me and Paris Hilton palling around. I bet I am a better dj. Notice her mp3 thing is on those oldschool boards??? this pic is viral. This was an epic week spent in Quebec City and MTL the day jack Layton died and my blog hits imploded because my post on meeting Rob Ford went up. I own the rainbow crop top from Wildfox Couture though I suspect actually gave it to my niece. Sad face.

I look like someone I just can’t figure out who. Someone with long hair. blah who cares haha.

A pic from last month some time. I am not exactly Kim Kardashian selfie-bad but my ass is maybe better. Quotable.

Just checking in on my guys.

:( still won’t heal. wtf. Anyway it was worth it cos I realize that I am awesome at volleyball and not shitty like I remember from school. Even when I played once on the beach in Mexico and was mortified beyond belief for myself. I can serve after all which was my main fear, all the other vball things I can do.

Lots of storms lately, right? We were fine btw thanks for asking team planet Burlingtron. I got soaked in the rain last night all yolo and cray cray happy about it then apparently cp24 had it on blast that the levees were broke in btown but we’re fine, am fine. Saw a chick at work’s basement was flooded though :(.

Another pic from earlier last week. Do you want to hear my thing about sleeveless shirts? They make me uncomfortable and but, I can wear them now cos my arms aren’t fat but I still feel like some motorcycle groupie or that I am trying to be something when really all I am being is an awesome object of guy can rock a sleeveless, mahmean bro? Right now I’m wearing my plaid sleeveless too and it’s looking pretty good maybe we’ll have to table this discussion til another time.

Getting restless now. Shutting up.

There better be more heatwaves before summer is through.

Had a fun boozeless dinner. I know right! Anyway. Was this lamb I will never know, was probably lamb. The food of Burlingtron is beginning to unimpress me I have eaten everywhere and boycotted some. What a whiner right!

Sometimes you just have to be ghetto fabulous what can I say?

Have a killer week mes amis!

Can’t believe it is Tuesday.

Okay I semi-promise to give selfies a break.

Take a long last look this baby is sold.

Goodbye for real. xo ps. Hi MTV Canada viewers.

++++

PS. Don’t forget a lotta YOLO happens on my tumblr too.

the leads are bad

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Hi. Waves. Yawns. Waiting for the brick to get here then I’m meeting BF at volleyball tourny and he rules cos he told me what to wear, luckily I have a beach outfit on hand AT ALL TIMES. What would Spicoli do? Exactly! Once I take my shirt off just watch out. I am nervous to meet sport people! Cliquey lot, no? We will see. You know me I over think and think. Ooh Truck is here gotta go brb.

The legs still need to go on and it’s bigger than this pic shows etc so forth but there it is.

I waited for the darn thing so I get to christen it with a shameless selfie.

Peace guy. You will go in that other room which will be used for creative collaborative pursuits at some point in the future no one has time for.

He said he thought I would show up all wild to dinner with his dad, not like this. Dude no way, wild hair doesn’t come out for months. I was equal parts slutty and sporty and innocent and goofy. Disarming. Yes. That.

Today is wild and sporty full dbag, though.

I like this guy. He sits in the window and stares at the parking lot. All cats exhibit the same behaviours. All solitary monastic little furbags, them. My mom and I talk to this cat because we are the R-word.

Okay I am psyched for this volleyball thing now. When I hashtag it on instagram good thing happen too so, follow me today for a looky-lookeroonie! xoxo rlw

ps. shows I have been watching lately if you wanna watch them too and discuss are as follows:

ray donovan, the mindy project and penny dreadful.

Oh Rocky.

BYE!

Note to self and world.

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Hey look I have 3 hands.

Hiya friends, ready for the next totally gossip girl installment?

I don’t really know what to add anymore or say, things I haven’t already said or thought a million times before. Pictures on instagram, or facebook or twitter. Hey thanks a lot social media you big jerks, y’all pretty much obliterated blogs.

Only the real McCoys still blog these days I feel, the Wayne Gretzky’s?

That’s why you save exclusive content for your blog so people have to go look. Well, thanks for making me look at this shit Lauren! #THRillhouse #OMG #NOT

Friday night. We found a cougar wall. I keep taking these “model” poses for a casting agent who is like excellent but nope and I am too uncomfortable to get anyone but my bf to take them. Actually Mom should do it! But for the sake of convenience I haven’t had my hair did proper to take some yet, of all the pictures I take I know. I know. I am just as pissed as you. I go like, of all the pictures I have sent can’t they tell what I look like yet? Arm up really? I’ll nail it soon don’t worry.

I was shocked to discover that I am the nature one of the two of us or just know more spots being someone who grew up here and have visited the 5 parks numerous times since a 4 year old. He can have volleyball. I get to have nature buttt now he’s converted which is pretty sick.

These are new at Crawford lake. I love how much sense they make. They should make tons more. Turn it into some bizarro art forest of madness, which it now is so they did okay then.

Of all times spent here before this one wins. Videos to look forward to in another post.

He saw me stand beside a short chick on Friday at dinner and he was like baby you’re tall I never knew that before cos I am such a freak. I melted.

This is my wallpaper meow.

Man.

This goat and slaw was amazing.

I now know the difference between gelato and ice cream and I am too lazy to type it so go look on my instagram zzzz…

This is last night’s cruisin thing we came upon by the beach. Right on right on.

Work outfit. Shorts from MEC. Gonna go get some more. Shirt by Jay Manuel.

Parked at my place and walked to town, walked back and then went to his to watch Ray Donovan – our new best friend.

He sent roses too. I was got lightheaded and blushed but obvs thoroughly loved it. I motored to the front desk. Leaving them at work I think they’ll fair better. I might need to look at them on the weekend though!! jjkjk He made us stay in Saturday and felt bad I think but we still had a fun time.

Alright that’s a wrap time to get my body in gear to keep this catch. Ps. What’s up Ryan sorry we were too good to talk to each other, I remember you from Vancouver Matthew Good days PEACE!

PPS. Manitobah Mukluks’ pics next post.

XO RLW

Fell in shove

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Bonjour mes amis, or whatever douchey superlative greeting works for you. Loving Saturdays lately. Now that we are getting them right.

I just finished eating this salad that quite possibly may be the first salad I have made from “scratch” in ages. It starts with salad then I’ll start cooking again hopefully. I tend to eat out or eat from a box. AHAH

Despite the rain, flowers. Knew it would rain this weekend cos someone at work broadcasted that so ensured that we did something outdoors-ish yesterday after work.

Went to MEC. New addiction in only that all the stuff I’d want to buy and normally hunt through winners for which I hate, is now altogether. Aka sporty tight stuff. I bought that bra over his shoulder in lieu of a nike one even though it cost more. We had a hippie’d out older chick cash us out and loved it.

Then to offset the spending we went to no thrills. What a scene that place is. I smashed a bottle of san pel on our Way out because my plastic bag snapped oops.

Not only are these fake-out chucks but they are SURF SHOES. Neoprene wonders like, walking through rough b-town beaches shoes. Stoked. Bring on a heatwave man.

This was just last weekend. We do so much and I blog so seldomly that the concept of time is lost on me. Living moment-to-moment which is the way to be instead of waiting for 5 weeks to be happy or whatever amount of time it is until your next big thing. Bang the gong everyday.

I have a new idea for a book and it would be called AN ANSWER FOR EVERYTHING. That no matter what crap people say to you when you express your belief you say, “That is nice but, I am still right and here is why _________.” Gonna be a smash hit!

We plan to go away end of August. Beginning in Orlando and then ending up North at his sis’ cottage.

We met on Tinder. LOLOLL. He is the only guy I met, the first and the last and we got rid of our accounts. But of course I was getting spotted on it like immediately and afterward during the cross-over period. I did not at all take meeting him seriously nor him I and I think that was the magic of it or the trick. It’s like online dating except mobile and more accessible and I whole-heartedly recommend it.

I wish it was like this.

We were eventually/quickly like, well you’re awesome, I’m awesome, why not? You can be picky and have anyone you want out there if you’re in the same league as each other but then there are things like chemistry that are pretty excellent, attraction. It all seems to be working so far. For chicks my age (and older) it seems impossible to land a man, in Toronto too. Though I have been out of the whole scene for a bit anyway with my LD relationship. I am a weirdo long story short.

Local boyfriends are the shit. You can like, SEE them. Fwaha. Everything becomes amazing. We dress like dinks, are dinks (double income no kids) and we’re always up to hi-jinx, people get a kick out of it it seems. Happiness is intoxicating.

We’re going dancing tonight. Sorry to make you barf all the time.

See how I could just so easily have a shorter haircut? Sorry mom but it is not happening.

My manager did a 10k on Thursday night like no big deal and it was in town so I ran over to cheer her on, did my own run, then met up with her and her peeps at the finish line and I made it with 2 minutes to spare. I don’t normally bring my phone when I run cos I like to have as little on me as possible (which is why it rules if you run to a bar to pee or whatever and they comp you a drink just saying hypothetically, which happened to my mom and I once) anyway I had my phone so I took pics of my run this time while I killed time for managress to do her thing. I see so many beautiful things when I run it’s a shame not to take pictures of it but it’s also great to have restraint.

That’s her and her SIL. They both killed it. One of these days maybe I will become a marathon type person too. One of these days. Maybe. If you stick with fit people you get fit. My bf is a varsity volleyball wizard. Turns out there is an entire scene of people, volleyball celebrities. He is one of them. It’s neat that we don’t know anything about the other’s worlds and another reason why we click. Just wait til I learn how to serve a ball. I made the team in school but I was the worst. I made it cos I was super tall. I was better at basketball. I’d say soccer is my best.

He’s funny like me though and acts like he’s on a tv show when he cooks and does kitchen shit like how I do. I will exploit it eventually.

Sorry I’ll shut up now it’s getting to be party time.

I ran along side these beachy teens on my circuit route back to town. Love summer. Love living in town and taking advantage of it on me-nights.

Beer fest Burlingtron. First annual. We aren’t going. Plus those dopes all got rained on today lol and you have to pay to get in and Raymi don’t pay like that. You can get in to sound of music fest and rib fest for free. I know they have to do it for security drinking age reasons though but anyway, it’s a commitment to drink beer all day which I didn’t want to do. I prefer running through it for free on the soft launch/night of set-up in my running ninja outfit like I belong there and get away with because I am a self-entitled local prickhead. Plus I can outrun them. Which I received instant-karma for because I ran too hard and blew my legs out and have been sore ever since. No I wasn’t being chased, maybe from my own self and inner demons perhaps. I’m getting super athletic though btw.

Looks fun though.

I missed him at this point so took some cute manipulative selfies for later sendage. Then he messaged me while I was talking to Jimmer Jammer in town whom I bumped into and said what are we doing tonight? Our night off. So, I win/won that round. It’s nice to have someone so into you, I can’t even believe it. To have someone healthy and trustworthy to adore you.

Having a friend in the beginning stages of dating is also amusing to me, because he is at the part where you’re eyeballing your phone obsessively and deciphering texts, ugh brutal. I give good advice though. DO not give up your power. Oh but don’t worry I have almost blown it so many times with my new guy already before with psychotic whatsapp messaging but its cool now. It’s not so much cat and mouse as it is tiger and lion. Even when you know you’re gonna displease them with a decision you’re going to make you just have to back yourself up and be like, sorry! Cos they’d it to you and you’d have no choice but to give in. Compromise works. Just being adults, maybe?

Sharing dreams together too. Like awesome cars in the future prospects. Yesterday we followed a Mclaren up Brant and it was fun.

Okay guys have a great night I heat my battle cry music playing and it’s time to paint my face do my hair and all that. Check ya later! Didn’t mean to make this picture so big.

Way to go girls! 10 km under an hour. Rules.

Update! Not going out. Inside dance party it is. C’est la vie.

pps. I just did the math and we met on June 17th for anyone who cares about that kinda thing.

tough crowd

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From the land of ADD – hi all! Lets get down to it. Yesterday felt like a Thursday, so now that it’s Thursday (night off from new beau bro) it’s like YEAH IT’S THURSDAY!!! There is just something about Thursday, right? Oh you animals!

Supposed to dye my hair tonight. We will see, we will see. It gets this awesome kind of red as my roots come in and fades because I can never find this actual tone of red. I will have to visit that Shopper’s I used to go to… anyway, air dye tip: always stretch it out as long as you can. I baby my hair so it grows. Someone said it seemed like I had long hair over night. Um no. I have been working at it desperately and depressingly, painstakingly if you will. I WISH overnight. Likewise hair tip, some days you have to bun it. Let it be dirty. Like a weekend of camping and seldom brushing teeth (and by camping I mean cottages).

Lunch. When is Shawarma ever bad though? Good company too!

I combined two important “pieces” from my collection over the years today. Confidence and Self-actualization. NOT! This shirt and that onesie more like. Seen!

If you are embarking on a new relationship such as I, here is a courtesy tip: Do not go to the Brick directly after work together. Eat first. Brick second. More like Prick.

And I went for a tan because I am all about self-improvement. I stole that from Damara. She has braces. So she doesn’t have Avril Lavigne teeth anymore. I didn’t know Avril Lavigne had those teeth until D pointed it out.

New relayshe tip 2: do not succumb to your crotchety stressed out waitress after the Brick. Oh man she was a trip. She didn’t even know her own combo offerings and fought with bf. My eyes bulged out. When two people both set in their ways (us) and intelligent people who also are happy go lucky with senses of humour but high standards, everything is a joke, sets you off. The trick in life is patience and make things fun, always. Yes be serious but when things go awry, see the humour. BUT if one person feels like snapping and are within their rights then by all means call another out. Don’t be a doormat.

Sorry for all this preaching. I drink a lot of coffee and work in a creative environment and I consume information all the live long day, I feel as if I am formulating a Ted talk at all times. I watched my stand up video again and was struck by how calm and intellectual I sounded because I was launching into all these advice-like tangents to the young kids who were thoroughly digging it too. So, long story short I am cooking up another little public speaking thing/stand-up/whatever. I mean, I always have this blog as a soundboard which I used to write long winded insane things all the live long day before I do not know why I keep defending it defensively.

Nice couch though right! He ordered it before we met and now it is here,arrives Saturday and he wanted me to see it. But then he wanted to go over entire house redecorating plans which I could not focus on immediately after work I am like Don Draper, I need to decompress. We were being swarmed like mental and I was not keen on the attention. We are the dynamic duo and we get a lot of attention. He’s basketball tall, I am, Raymi… I’m not used to it plus the desperate salesman were angering me. Bf takes responsibility and today said sorry I forgot that girls just wanna have fun. Bahahha. It’s true. I have a Brick hatred from youth, I was dragged around to all the furniture stores and wallpaper paint etc cos I was the young kid.
and a loner type.

Unfortch I literally gotta run now though! Lotsa love, Raymbo.