omfg I am blogging

Hello mes amis. Whatever ha ha.

It’s hard to blog when you live in the beach. Have wicked ADD. Are busy af. Summer. OMG shiny things. A baby pug. L-i-v-i-n’ and sum such things but here we are now again so I will try to stuff something awesome down your throats. Truth be told I am not a massive narcissist I don’t feel the inclination to scream off a soapbox everyday my goddamn thoughts and espouse my opinions rantily. Blogging was always a powerful thing to me and the more you do it the more you get out of it. It also fatigues you just as much. Behind scenes I am a massive proponent of blogging to everyone surrounding me and I hugely encourage them to show show show! But me I don’t show or write shit as we all very well know lately. I have no reason to be clammed up rn at all I am just busy doing me. I am working on projects. I don’t need a ribbon for all of my things as in I don’t need to status update every time I floss. I don’t crave validation. I do feel bad about not writing as much (at all) and I throw it on the to do list. So here is a bloody blog post then ARRRRR I am 33 years old and going to talk about myself on a blog that I started 16 years ago.

We have been loving it here man. Beach time rules. I am a burnout at heart a born wild child free spirit hippie waste of space dickhead yeah yeah I know who I am. I see me. So the east end is perfect for that. However it is bittersweet every moment I cherish because this is just a sublet til September. I am always stressed out about shit anyway so what else is new what does it matter. Enjoy your life while you live it. It makes you less ugly if you don’t worry. Don’t get me started ugh.

New places and spaces inspire and take over your psyche. I was watching Season 2 of Bloodline on a Netflix bender that is set in the Florida Keys during hot day after hot day happily in front of a fan on the floor out here in the dead end of the east end. It does feel remote out here a little. The beach is incredible, glorious. New restaurants and bars to piss everybody off at yay!

We had the place to ourselves for a couple of weeks too that was fun and boy how June has just flown by. Enjoy every moment. Enjoying every moment. A psycho mantra in my head as I comb the streets the park the boardwalk lol.

No. Am not narcissistic. Just proud of looking pretty sometimes with minimal effort and it was kind of a skinny moment? Don’t worry I got progressively fatter throughout the day. I do things like that now. ENJOYING MYSELF EATING MAYONAISE FRENCH FRIES ciders panzerottis… just sharing facts and wrapping up the details of my life with you.

This phase of my life involves teenage regression. The pizza pockets lifestyle. Making up for many years’ lost time of not being a beach urchin. Now I know why beach bums seem like their brains are always blasted out walking barefoot in dopey hippie looks and dreadlocks. I am romanticizing like 1 person I saw once in Ft Lauderdale fwahah but anyway it’s because you hear the sound of seagulls and instantly melt into nostalgia McDonald’s dipped soft ice cream cones wet bathing suits stringy hair and freckles time slows and things that really mattered incessantly stop mattering. I feel like I have been living on the run for months it has been a long ass winter and the beach is a nice place to settle if you’re a weirdo like me. or like to walk around like a space cadet and you need some time to figure out your life.

Julian gave me this heart button the first time after we hung out. He threw it in my bag along with other trinkets and junk. We are the same like that. We like things and stuff. Creatives. Hyperly creative and excitable. He inspires me to try and be better.

I was sitting down the other day exactly where I am sitting right now. I was about to blog my face off. Then this dingaling turned up. Then he was placed in a nice home yesterday and now I can finally start getting some shit done today lol. There’s another pug puppy here but I am doing better at ignoring him. Keeps trying to friend me and shit but I am not having it so many dogs have gone through my life lately I can no longer handle it emotionally.

We totally bonded *sniffle*.

We had to move this kept knocking it.

Sigh.

Cutest of the litter in my opinion and I did not know personalities could differ so much or even be a thing so soon. I really loved this little guy lets never talk about it again.

This is my favourite house in the day. One of. I never saw it at night before. Astounding.

Always art jamming it whever the mood strikes too. Going to paint starry night mural out back.

I’ve taken over social for Happy Juice Co. That stuff is gold mang.

Taking Brass Vixens classes as my schedule allows it’s great fun. Excited for a twerk class next!

We went to see Kiefer Sutherland at The Horseshoe last Monday. Took my Mom. Went to the after party. Ordered drinks on his tab. Killer night lol I say no more.

My mom got a lot of rad shots and managed to get up dead center I knew she would. I did NOT like the audience they were horrifically rude and snappy some people very protective of their personal space my mom got bullied too. I forget that as a couple you operate as a unit. You are simply, two people. So when you’re alone it’s easier to deek through the crowd alone. Harder as two. I cannot deal with rude jerks which is what we had to do and made it halfway through the crowd before a woman blocked us from going further meanwhile a guy is screaming in Julian’s face and that is when I LOST IT. It was hot af too. Just way too much after a long day at the beach with my mom.

Another one for the books as usual.

We all had our moment with him too.

Kiefer liked my mom more than me. I am fine with that.

I took the country band thing seriously and wore plaid. I should have dressed like a slonky. My bad. SO I didn’t even try to butter him up I was like hey. Bahah. We got him shots of whiskey which he didn’t drink so we drank them. Maybe he was scared of us. I literally don’t care.

Played some gigantic birdies badminton the morning after.

We got better as we played.

:).

Kinda feel like playing now.

Rebecca came by with Bowie for a night that was a great time! I have many more pics to share later on everyone is talking to me in the kitchen right now it’s hard to focus.

We went to Le Baratin for dinner last week. Divine! Going on a diet tomorrow for frig sakes.

Oh lord yum yums.

I like fancying up sometimes.

I made a throwback collage.

Alright ttyl dinner time I’ll save Donna Dolphy’s post for next one xo.

relevant resonant

Being a big mouth while having secrets is mega fuckin hard I’m just gonna come out with that one. Having a full, eccentric life that feels to be bursting at times in every way you finally want it to is absolute insanity but this is the way it is and how I am. I am going to blog like a demon now because that is what has always centered me. My ADD is off the chain and it takes a lot to focus as well there’s always a lot of people to say ttyl to. I am tired of these side converations I think I can navigate while trying to write, to anything. NO MORE. Lauren Write needs to write so let her. Disappearing off the face of the (city) earth and from phone felt so good last week. I am doing that again this weekend while I hopefully sleep for 48 hours that I’ve sorely needed.

Sorry but I am tired of being there for people. I need to do me right now. I need to cut some of you out. Thin the herd. I have virtual check-ins with people, all kinds of handfuls of them everyday all day long and it’s starting to make me insane. The OCD and guilt to reply to every person last week, went away. It’s OKAY if you just ghost. It’s ok if you don’t reply. I am sorry if that stings some of you but I have been putting myself second for too long. I mean I like being there and I like the friendships but trying to mainain them all is driving me bonkers and maybe even made me sick. I am spread around too thinly. When all of my friends are amazing creatives doing great things I love to keep track of all of them and pitch in, take part in all of that too (FOMO) but it’s simply just too much. Don’t you agree? Do you feel like your head is barely above water sometimes managing your life schedule? I must be doing some of the wrong things. I am just tired of saying I am busy to the same select group of people over and over again and them not getting it sorry if that pisses you off but busy isn’t over until it’s over. I am busy as well as sick. I have started a new job and I am in the process of moving as well as managing another background drama do you get the picture yet? I can’t be your party girl all the fucking time. Posting a hot pic isn’t necessarily a thirst trap for you and I do not give second chances, while I am at it. If I made time for you and you bailed on that scheduled hang, I am not hanging with you again. You showed yourself once. I have no time for flakes. If anything I get to be the flake. Not you.

I basically NEED to do this post before I can finish the next one in queue which actually should take importance over this one here but like I said “I need this” ha ha. As a creative. We have our quirks and “rules” our practises and we have our rituals. One day I’d like to let some crazy bastard film my process and then you’ll all be like OMFG idiot. Hahha. I know I am charming and insane and worthwhile. Hey I like me!

Stacy, a hairstylist (top right) and friend of mine from Grateful Head salon on Dundas said some really nice things to me last night at Swan Dive that squeezed some of the bullshit perspective I have about myself out of my brain and I was like YEAH FUCK YEAH and THANK YOU! I was speechless. He thinks I’m a better marketer, seller more than I even know. Invaluable information. I will talk more about him and Grateful Head later on don’t you worry.

When you live a high octane life and you’re busy and you just can’t get out of things AND you are sick it eventually blows up in your face. I just had a sauna and steamed out some toxins and now I am ready to rock right after I pop another Dayquil. WHOOOOO!

Now here’s some fourth wall broken down I just sent everything I wrote above to a creative co-hort and here it is.

thats a real powerful blog post. So real, genuine. People will love it

Thank u
Aww
All the good head cases will come out

Good on you serious

Cos I posed questions
Also telling people to leave me alone

Let em, stirs up things
Yes
Get people talking, interested in what is going to happen to your sense of self. It tells people to take care of themselves too. Reminds them
It is great and inspirational

im tired of posting a selife then getting barraged
just watch the show and leave me the fuck alone
u are not a part of this
but its good for business u need them to love you

Yeah

tired of saying yes i am still busy
busy means busy
and busy doesnt end
(end rant)

The point is just leave me alone for a week. Two weeks. I feel like I am begging here. I mean don’t ignore me no don’t leeeeeeeeeave me. I just mean some of you in the inner circle I have more of a rapport with, stop griefing me for being MIA and not replying I just need to keep my focus. It’s nothing personal I will be back and I will go away again. That’s just who I am. This is me saying I need time and I will probably smash something if I have to repeat it to you again. Yes I have issues with rage, people who try to manipulate me emotionally and try to take advantage of my time. If you want the doctor to be in you have to make it worth her while. Someone wanted to have a business call and I charged for it, he asked why I said because this is what I do. You want me involved, you have to pay me to care. You want my insights and tastemaking, you pay for that too. For me to pause the many things I am always trying to do to stop, drop, and roll for your cause…you pay for it. Time is money. Getting my brain to concentrate requires energy I’d rather direct to things I’m already busy doing and to throw another thing on the plate is fine, but it has to be compensated.

I don’t care how snotty or self-entitled I sound. When is the last time you saw a post here? I am busy I am busy don’t you get it I am busy. When I was a 9-5 copywriter I was busy asf I never spoke of my work I kept my head down as much as I could and I seldom blogged. Go where the money is, go to that. Shut out everybody else and don’t you dare feel any guilt about it. Focus on your shit. Other people are way better at this than I ever was, living for themselves and getting their priorities straight. Me? I collect a bunch of ding dongs to occupy my (waste of) time and I am 33 years old now. I can’t balance it anymore. I love to chat yes I do but I also want to dive into my work and do better work. More work. WERK. I am building something here and I’d like to continue, to finish it. I am my priority right now, you aren’t. I’d like to be there for everybody but I can’t anymore. I don’t want to lose friends either but if you don’t understand any of this you’re not a real friend anyway. Real friends have patience and generally their own shit going on too, they get me whereas everybody else is a needy cling-on and I am not your mommy anymore.

This has been building up inside of me for a long time. Sometimes I just get irked. I can anticipate why people are talking to me, what they’re really after, and it generally doesn’t align with my own intentions or what will ever be feasible between us so stop leching out on me. I post sexy things for my brand and not to get the male gaze or whatever shit my snide detractors claim, or think. I do it for me. To empower myself. There may be a little attention-seeking there too but mostly it’s for the arts and my lifelong passion of showing my fashion, looks, my vibe, and expressing opinions of my experience. We are allowed to do what we want in our lives. I am tired of making excuses for being “a blogger” after 16 years.

I have been sick for a week so sorry for the crabby I will move on to more of the photo and caption straight-forward style approach to blogging now. I had a lovely bday lunch. Was supposed to do one thing but those plans fell through and so was able to hit The Drake with a good bro, yay.

Maybe I am recovering from my birthday still something happened to me on it like in the Santa Claus or Freaky Friday. “I’ve changed” and for the better you’ll see.

Thanks mom for all the sweet gear.

I may be an idiot but I got nice gambs.

It was brutal weather on March 31. We waited out a lightning storm and drank champagne Heather and I did and busted out the selfie stick. Heather got us tickets to Field Trip. What a little scamp I lurve her. So do all the men. HEheh.

I tried to dress it up for this special day. Two outfits. Why not. I am over my birthday now my birthday complex is gone now I’m just like in post bday apocalypse recovery mode LOL haha okay I’m shutting it.

No I am not into the occult but other people are and I want to make money off them. This Wednesday Addams is available FOR SALE make an offer.

Ahhh Fujahtive. They’ll be having their own post. It was a solid show and the crowd was pretty great too! It always is and they always are.

Mom got excellent shots as usual.

Nothing beats a crisp white dress now I’m all set for a P.Diddy white party stay tuned. Thanks Sara Duke!

Dropping mad hints everywhere no? Lol.

What do you do with this life how do you organize it what do you make of it how do you showcase it. Just get on with it I guess.

A lot of great stories from this evening. So much love.

Love it.

So many possibilities found at The Darling Mansion.

Developed a (later on in life) dreamify addiction. Unique endless ways to be creative especially if one already has an artistic eye and access to wicked sets.

Love it. Loon records.

Please hang up and try your call again this is a recording.

Aging like a fiiiine wine. I’ve heard worse and recently too haha.

I just take so many pics of things and surroundings and myself that I make these collages that’s the short of it. I like how it tells the story.

Rural fashions.

I’ve been working for Shannon Brass Vixens queen as her personal assistant this week. Timing in life is everything and so far so good I love her. We go back some years. It all just makes sense.

Looking forward to getting a tan and rocking my new locks. Or at least not being sick anymore or looking Lydia Deetz-tired.

Uncanny.

So I been busy so I gwan slow it down this w/e and kick this cold’s ass. Looking forward to my guitar lesson tomorrow.

Goodbye dark roots. I thought they were kinda cute but your next colour application is always looming.

NO cut this time just a colour. Once I wash it and have it straightened like usual I am keen to see it in all its glory. Hair obsessed. Part of my personal passion project. When I had fug hair no one was nice to me. How you look is important it shouldn’t rule your whole world all the time but it pays off when an effort is made.

I love your loo Grateful Head.

Everyone needs a little birthday sprite like this.

Just don’t touch the merchandise. Okay I think I’ve hit the wall night everybody!

Oh yeah, don’t be pissed at me. I will get back to you when I can. There is a long list of you that’s all.

Elusively aloof

Hey gang, ready for one of those things that I do here? Good me too. Lets get it over with. None of this is in order, rhyme, or reason. I’m managing several projects as usual and this is just a dump post of IG images plus some extras. I go crazy if I don’t blog here and my life (in pictures) accumulates.

*Psst: I started writing this yesterday (Sunday) fyi.

Tuesday went to Southern Accents (aka Southern Comfort lol easy mistake) after Guu now called kinka izakaya. Tuesday was a funny day I had a couple appts, hit the mall to do a long-standing chore then met up with another new colleague. Hey whatever I dont need to explain myself to you people!

Life is about balance. I am also addicted to “going out”. That balance I speak of.. the other half of my life is spent sitting in front of my laptop working so “lay off me”.

Errrm. If you go into a library you’re gonna read a book and if you see a bottle of absinthe you’re gonna have a sip. It was the perfect storm and I totally nursed it like a lady.

I ventured out dressed in gonna speed-walk home gear so felt like a desperate housewife eating at Kinka Izakaya just a little. I made it work.

I have misplaced my Detroit Tigers hat. Whoever has it, Give it baaaaaaack.

On Earth Day last weekend I was feeling a little cooped up and so guess what I did haha. I painted the down just a bit. Birthday month kinda thing.

Double-header blog gig day a couple weeks ago one job being with Toughroof, flat roof repair. Went out to the jobsite pretty under-dressed for it which resulted in another cold a few days later that is still in my throat. I have a kennel cough.

This view never gets old and largely is why I stuck around here so long haha.

When my hair is unwashed it goes more red. I am trying to stretch out salon visits in between colourings rn. When I wash it all the blond pops out again. My roots make it so I have to do that model-hair flip thing. Hair hair hair etc.

Happy I finally got the right size bracelet for my teensy wrist. Aside from my nose, all my other features are small like hands, ankles, boobs, wrists. The more ya know. Actually while on the topic, my boobs are not that small they are deceptively small in appearance but are actually quite the scoops. It’s my platform and I’ll declare whatever the hell I please here on it. I wonder how addicted to charms collecting I’ll become.

Adore this place. Don’t ever leave or change.

Sometimes you just need some spicy octopus. This cleared my brain right out. I took a bite and got back to yammering then all of a sudden I felt like I was going to sneeze and my eyes watered right up. I find that if you senselessly flap at your mouth and at the air like an idiot for a bit the heat will subside and you’re left with a nice little buzz and your co-eater is like, you ok bruh? While tears and snot streams down your face, “I’m fine.”

Turns out eating and drinking lots gets you fat. What? The zipper on these bit the dust. You have to wear them on a skinny day. With spanx. Anyway, I stopped ordering pizza for a few weeks and have slimmed down finally. I am exercising too. I want to be toned. I have a vision. No more farting around.

Dream come true. Everyone loves my DJ name Babysitting Money. “My DJ name”. I am Raymazing. Remember when I used to have joie de vivre and say things like that? I must have been kicked in the head by a mule, or by bitches. Too many bitches, so little time. So many distractions. Y’all don’t even know. The object of the game is to keep it that way. I am well blessed in accruing lots of great mentors and cool people, peers and colleagues along the way. I love collecting good people who are good to me and believe in me. Tired of people hating me for breathing.

We thought the event went at 7. It started at 5. I was late. Showed up to a swarm of nerds. My big coat and I trying to make our way through the crowd I was having a mega-anxiety attack. I needed a drink stat. I am not a .ca member, I only own .coms so I had the white lanyard aka a loser. No open bar for me! No biggie I was the star of the party and had all my new friends and future colleagues getting me dranks through the night. You need to rsvp for next year. Don’t wear a turtleneck though. I was dying. My jokes were on fire though.

I wanted this but I was in a stingy bitch mood. I still want it though, it was a little big. Distressed clothing is the best I have their contact I’ll nag them for stuff. A shirt like this would have seen me through summer.

Canada was not cool enough to be represented in fashion. That’s cool we good.

One of my bigger life regrets is not buying a tartan plaid mini blazer that I tried on at a clothing sale in bar in Ottawa. I have pics in it I’ll show ya. Ugh. I haggled and the girl would not budge the longer she looked at me in it cos she knew I needed that blazer it was made for me. I did not want to lose so I did not buy it. REGRETS.

Was not expecting to go here but it’s just around the corner from Kinka so why not. I like escapism bars. If you never leave the fucking city you kinda have to.

We had such a blast we stuck around for trivia and then it got ugly. Hella competitive. Okay not ugly but they wouldn’t let you even touch your phone and sometimes you need to reference stuff (not cheat!) or follow whomever you’re talking to on IG and then all of a sudden you’re getting yelled at for being on your phone in front of the entire room. Plus you’re drunk. I was just like FINE. We had too many people at our table and at first were split into two teams and we were mean af to each other then got nice when we just banded together so whatever it’s just one over the limit why not merge teams but not before one of us said Duluth instead of Buffalo. Rowdy is fun though I love talking trash as I’m sure you’ve noticed.

When you’re not feeling your body, going out is a chore. Especially if you are a last minute outfit planner like me but it worked out I think. I’ll be gross and unshowered-ish for days then shower and feel like a beauty queen and take a bunch of pics then kind of hide for the rest of the week in my jogging pants.

A gf said this is one of my high fashion looks. The socks and the shoes like that. She just has a Melanie Griffith in Working Girl (those pumps and socks!) boner, so I am a little skeptical. I do notice a lot of women flicking their eyes down at me when we pass in an, oh that’s an idea kind of way. I know when things look trendy. I am not an idiot. Okay well I am but not in that capacity. I could be a legit stylist if I got my shit together. The more I brag about myself the longer this takes.

Hey again. I have a lot of these.

Club 54 disco inferno dress.

Earth day. Unexpected fun! Makes you feel like you saved the Earth a little. I bet in the future it’ll be mandatory to do it once a week for an hour and then more and more as we deplete the Earth of its renewable resources.

I bet these billboards were all lit though.

During bed to couch rotation I get to see the most spectacular ways of the sky over the city. It takes my breath away or would if I were properly awake. Then I go back to sleep for awhile.

RIP Rob Ford. You will be missed. It’s been interesting seeing the pitchforks come out and kind of disappointing. People love when villains die.

Winter hair. Wild animal. Can’t wait til it’s monstrously gigantic.

A Kir Royale. Loved our bartender this night. I have memories sitting at this bar. Kind of got a chill. I was so much younger. Felt like a kick in the pants.

Shotgun houses.

Lots of memories down here in the bunker of the Drake.

My celeb mogul besties list gets longer. My friend Dave knows Jelleestone (J!) and we recently became social media friends.

A refresher if you will. I went by Grasshopper records to see Dave after I went to The Darling Mansion and he knew J would be there, the stars just all aligned and now we are homies! Go Raymes.

Love hanging here. Hadn’t seen Dave in a month too. I know Dave through Geoffrey. It’s all very complex who cares.

So it was a good night. We hung around Dundas, went to Get Well. Record store. Studio. I am a lucky girl. Or I just spent a good deal making connections in my life and being awesome in general blah etc snore zzzz lol.

I also hadn’t seen my nice lady friend Tanya in a bit so I decided to drop in. More on that later!

No comment. I enjoy the composition. Kind of comical. I ate 4 taquitos and I don’t ever want to forget it and thus never do it again.

Beeeeeautiful.

Easter was a success. Some couldn’t show because of all their barfing kids so like I said, a success! Love our dysfunctional fam though. I’ll do an homage post when I have some time never.

My brother and I’s birthdays are ten days apart. Mine is on march 31. JUST SAYING.

GOOD TIMES. TTYL GUYS time to watch The Walking Dead and edit this post.

Head’s up 100% going to this so get a ticket and come with. Or better yet Retweet my tweet and win a set. I’m giving away two pairs of 2.

bored press send bored press end

Hey player haters. Holy my life is a stupid blur. I have to go on my FB to see if this photo was even used here yet I’ve seen it so much before already. Insert more endless blog complaints about blogging.

SO into this look in fact I gotta collage it bruh. My client was too cos the night of the Oscars he was all (texted) it is spellbinding (my word) how much Kate Winslet and I look exactly the same and I was like, huh now??

You know I googled that the very next morning and was like she even got the hair swoop down good work Kate’s team of stylists who obviously follow my instagram/entire life. Hopefully you will never have to see this picture of me again. I plan to “cover” my dinner at Drake OneFifty I dig it that much and intend to go back until they get sick of looking at me. I like to take pictures of great spaces and I also love a cocktail of theirs called the Rum Diary.

I had steak tartare and oysters. You’re just gonna have to wait til I upload the rest.

Hung out at my friend’s record store near the bar a couple Fridays ago. Very fun vortex night. One for the books? Went all over town and by that I mean like, two more places lol I am old. Do yourselves a favour and look up the time John Lydon was on Judge Judy. Classic. Maybe prep yourself a drink beforehand.

Tony took this of me at Swan Dive the same two weeks ago.

Cray nails. Whenever I hodge-podge them it’s just another thing for me to pick off. You think if I have a gf of mine manicure me I’ll leave them alone? Does that help?

My little wino buddy Heather and I learn a lesson in not putting glasses on the floor. Don’t cry over spilled wine just pour some more.

I’ll post more of this lady friend in time. The reactions kind of get too much tbh. All the people we already have in common LOSE IT knowing she and I “hang out”. People are babies. It’s super foreseeable. I’m an adult baby for life so I should know.

Went for food at this amaze place around the corner I’m not telling cos I don’t want it to be slammed when I go back. It’s a fine line of patronage vs promo on the little gems in the city.

Also the night I wore my cat dress. My outfits are layered and versatile. I also don’t take that many selfies believe it or not, whatever that many means. I just do it all in one night and then feed off those for days while in actuality I look like a disgusting slob behind scenes. FAMILY SECRETS.

Charlie Brown (gigantic) Avocado tree and its one ornament that I got for whining about being an adult on twitter b’y. When losing is winning.

Mike Sent a print of the time I got naked in a box at Lane Studios. It’s nice and big thank you. I bet one of my boys will want it for their wall. I’ll buy you a shawarma when that happens.

Played with an icicle the other day and had the time of my life. Just kidding I immediately threw it in the sink after this picture as it was cold and wet. Please tell me what to draw on that awesomely prepped canvas I am all out of ideas. Something hipster I presume. Haunting. Timely. No irony though we’ve all had enough of that.

Finally made time to go through Tony’s newer prints. Lovely, lovely. Might use that top right one as a profile photo it’s very Alicia Silverstoner, long hair-like. Guy’s got an eye.

Well looky-loo. Another Drake OneFity. I just convinced a client to meet there next week alternatively to a spot he had in mind. Pumped.

That’s what I wore to dinner. When in doubt don’t wear pants. Throw a blazer over it to tie it all in there. Maaaahvelous.

All I did this weekend was relax and eat. Made meals around the clock and watched films. The Salvation is disturbing word to the wise but it is also gripping and you’ll want a tattoo on the side of your temple once you see this one character named Princess who had her tongue cut out yeah I don’t mess around with my cinematography yo.

Went to an apres ski party on Thursday at The Everleigh. If you’re not in the mood to party I swear, things just happen in the universe that annoy you even more, no? That being said I had a good time catching up with “the crew” in “that scene” and as always look forward to the next.

I felt fat and crabby from trying to make an outfit to hide it and turns out I have no ski clothing, who knew lol.

Went to a day event last-last week as well was kind of a whirlwind couple of weeks there that’s why I feel none too guilty when I balance it out by being lazy af. I ate three of those cake pops. Been mad lit in the food dept lately bra. Now I know why it was vocalized once in my family that “no one can understand what Lauren is saying on her blog”. I try to give to all audiences. Just Urban Dictionary any word you don’t undertand or leave a comment about clarification. Don’t be shy.

Was nice to catch up with some old buds on Friday after work. I like Motel too. I like to visit places I used to go to I am constantly romanticizing shit.

My oh yeah I am a singer/musician hat. Shut up! Okay mates we’re getting the band back together. Lets have rehearsal STAT Boylord or bust. Alrighty then gotta scoot sorry if this post was boring af to you. xoxo

gets tiring being inspiring

Hi “everyone”. Here is a “blog post” wrapping up the last couple weeks of my life because why not. I promised the second sexier half of The Darling Mansion feature buuuut my brain needs a break. A me break. A totally, totally ME blog post in-between first mmmkay. I do a lot. I don’t break it down enough. It piles up then consumes me whole goddamn you social media.

Here’s a wee sampler. It still kills me I lost so many photos from my old phone… you’d be surprised how quickly you fill up the card of a new one.

Okay so last week I went to the Drake two nights in a row which is a major social suicide faux pas but my client really likes this place and we had a totally ridiculous fun time so why not. I am getting an age complex so I am starting to feel like a ghost haunting all these haunts I’ve always haunted but now I guess I’m the same age as those I used to hang with when I was younger soooo shut up Lauren it’s okay. I’m not the only Toronto personality out there still givin’er a go so here is to the lot of us.

What the hell (oh I just remembered lol) did I do the night before that resulted in my sleeping all day then waking up and hitting The Drake it was like I was dreaming still thank god my mental alarm clock got me up. I wore two similar black dresses with heels and black tights both nights in a row I was chuffed by the stupidity of myself in doing that Those whom also work in the industry are afflicted by this vampire lifestyle. BTW I’m at Swan Dive this Monday (tomorrow 9-close) come see me and my ballet skills I’ll be picking up beforehand at a fancy pants lesson I’m saying YES to.

The soosh at Drake is always drool-worthy. Kind of why went back again. Plus that damn cocktail menu too. The Rum Diary is my drink of choice fyi.

Drake dress one. Turning into a bit of a shift on me. Yeah yeah, sure sure.

Dress two. That was Friday I believe. My boots need to be shined and I need an insert cos they’re not level and I have no clue what happened other than probably Theater Bizarre walking around in them.

Pre-selfie to make sure I looked legit enough for my client supper. Dress up when you feel like hell and people can barely (never) tell they’re like wow you look so good all dressed up. Party girl tip. Except I have made more effort to dress up on a regular basis to maintain “a look” and overall peer acceptance. There’s a lot of fabulous looking and well dressed people in Toronto the stakes are mega-high you must always be fly.

I just remembered at least 4 other way more important blog posts I should be doing for Raymi Toronto right now instead of this ughhh hahha. Well at least I am blogging instead of Super Bowling. I have my phone lit up for different things I could be at today right now and I am doing a decent enough job at keeping the FOMO at bay.

Then squad goals showed up and I took them to every awful place I could (I’m so sorry!) okay we went to a lot of wins and we also went to a lot of don’ts too. I think I will use one bier markt situation in future stand-up for sure. I am building a set. Forever building a set I get crippling creative paralysis at times when the balance is tilted in the favour of doing practically everything else or other. I watched a fuck ton of movies yesterday that’s for sure.

We went for food at Rock Lobster for hot mess Sunday. I want to invent a hotel that’s check out hours are like 9PM come on bro baby needs to sleep this off.

Note the third (and new!) jar of cherries. That photoshoot takes place at the end of the week somewhere neat ;).

What’s the deal with American Cheese… well I wrote a whole bit around it but everyone said I talked about myself too much. It’s just really bad and really good bad. Good in the bad way. Possibly some irony too. Sometimes I’m just very, very basic. Because I am actually a total fruit loop. Not really Macaulay Culkin bizarre but pretty close.

Total win was at Gusto 101 pure delish. We had a blast catching up and shared a bottle of red which helped with absolute cold asf saunter back to hotel Germain. Snotty little bitches bruv tgif can’t believe was just a week ago boy the time goes.

IG caption: Did you bring enough makeup Lizzy? She’s like OH I just noticed that [how much makeup there was] LOL. I think Hotel Germain retweeted this photo they def called us gorgeous ladies – one and the same haha. They gave me good soshe media surrounding our stay there that’s a niiice.

:) Woah embedding tweets is funtacular.

Donair meat egg cheese breakfast thing on a bun. mmmm. Lizzy had lobster turns out that place IS a legit seafood restaurant and it’s not just an ironic name lol. Whagwan Darryl.

Another “on fleek” look at Swan Dive maybe. I am in the business of complimenting and being complimented.

Tony took this. Rebecca and her pot and my rake and then we made up a dance and I banged the pot like a drum and we are very immature at Swan Dive it is the best time it’s my job to have fun and bang the gong.

Bought three dresses at wieners around the holidays FOR the holidays and I wear them all the time on rotate it’s fun to make looks for Swan Dive you’re like a moving piece of art I almost wore my red gothic riding hood jacket with the red lace dress on Friday but felt it was crazy overload. Rob encouraged it. Which made me hella suspicious.

The 9th floor is where you get ice and they neglected to tell us that which we found to be funny as fcuk.

Love exploring hotels right? Eloise and The Shining complex for life. We went up to the roof for a lookeroonie this is the hotel where the ding dongs stayed when we first met and hung out #memories.

This is my friend Heather and I. More on that later!

Me on Friday. Also taken by Tony I love our in-house Swan Dive photographer. We are blessed. He helped build the bar too. Swan Dive has quickly become a go-to. I work there 9PM on Mondays til close and I open on Fridays as well til 9PM (except for this Friday and NEXT Monday I’ll be in on the Tuesday though instead etc I will keep you in the loop).

Stayed in (a coma) all week then by Thursday was restless plus we knew of this party that we had to go to (should go to) and were happy too then danced ass off at Two Cats with Shanny afterward you’ll see further down this post. It was a big two weeks for sure. And this is only the shit I am showing you not those “lost parts” that go in the vault and didn’t happen what who is talking?

Bunny love. You can see my Fryes and John Lennon bag in the background. The thing started to hump my leg and I was like NOPE BYE.

Some of this food we took to go and I forgot about the part of the night when we were at Weslodge as we made our way back to the hotel. Quite an indulgent weekend and life here for a good time bro.

I had to wear this hat cos my hair was super ratchet when times get tough the tough get creative. By tough I mean too lazy to shower and didn’t plan to go out til like an hour before we went it was go time! I am going to bring so much clothes to Swan Dive for the clothing swap/sale Abra puts together I will also let you know so if you have been eyeing some of my stuff I’ll post what I am parting with. I might have to wear this tomorrow at balleeeeeeeet.

Love this photo of Tanya and I <3. The D Mansion is the tits.

Legendary night I met Courtney I can’t even remember how I got into that rooftop night club on Queen. It’s all in my archives.

Oh Shanny. When we were dancing at Two Cats a guy commented that we were like the two MAD Spy vs. Spy characters in our black and white outfits. VERY astute observation there King west guy. That place is fun. Gong show vortex. We SAW THINGS too politically incorrect to mention heehh.

Thank God for this.

Cirque du soleil is my new outfit inspiration. Suitesoleil was my first hotmail address. Fact. That was during my I am french phase. I was 14?

Woah relax selfie.

Well here we go.

Two cats is on our way home so, why not.

My night vision blows thank goodness for this flashlight I am considering a headlamp. I bet you some joker will bring me one now.

I quite enjoy all my new friends, custies, and regulars. I am social plus booze makes for good talking and times and people with beards and toques that sort of thing. Lots of laugh out loud moments.

We walked to Motel from Swan Dive. I had no hat or pants so to keep warm we loudly talked the whole way there hahaa. Claire and I are the ame age-ish.

When I lived on Dowling I used to go to Motel a lot. I love theme bars. I got stories guy. Maybe now that I am reliving a prior Bukowski phase I can write about that time period again. Interesting.

Reminds me of my Stephen King book consumption phase, derelict scary ghost towns where weird shit goes down wow what a creative mind.

More booze more selfies. Love my ratchet nails kinda works.

That bunny art though.

Had to put him in the friend zone. With all the rest. Heheh.

Great style all around.

Heather and I went to kind of an awful apartment and had the most hilarious experience EVER ever ahahahha. This was on the wall. Our cab driver goes, this building? Oh yes! Bed bugs! What? Bahah.

I dig the stairway to nowhere though and the water fountain and music jamming away ???

Then we walked to Parkdale for a bite.

Never ever a dull moment anywhere in Parkdale. Could not run away fast enough lol.

Then she drank a bottle of red by herself (none for me sober day dude way too necessary) and hoofed it home to do her stuff and things and that’s that for today my friends check you on the flip side! I am the only person not watching the superbowl I think.

just blog

Hey sports fans!

God. Sometimes I wish I was sponsored by Heineken. Whenever I crack one I immediately start to blogging. I always bought Heineken to work to, a 6 pack of green bottle goodness like I’m somewhere further away than where I am. Heineken. The stuff of dreams. I should go back into ad copy. Anyway moving along. How’s your Saturday? Good, good. I just got up from a nap, I got my hair did today, I ate noodles. I’ll show you all about it right now in fact plus some other Raymi world stuff.

Earlier in the week and by that I mean late last week I ventured out to blow off some steam in the hood of the new bar I tend at and it was a crazy night, the end. lol.

Been putting in some late nights lately. It makes it so the days in between you’re kinda like -_- and do nothing, climb the walls a little then wait til you are there doing a late night again. You seeee, my friends opened a bar and new businesses need lots of love. So come by and be sure to love us. Not to sound desperate but I make it a point to keep my look on fleek while at work to practise being a lady and to over-compensate for all my short-comings. So far so good.

My highschool prom date was across the way at the bar here and recognized my aura as I was taking these selfies. He (rightly so!) put it together that I would be the only one taking pictures of themself in the light of a red lamp on Dundas st in Toronto. I’m going to let that sink in and guage how much of a loser I should be feeling like right now about that. Whatever! A zebra can’t change their stripes brah. Prom fact: I unexpectedly got an award for MOST HUMOUROUS PERSON! I got a certificate and everything and had to shuffle across the dance floor under the disco ball in nervous shock in front of everybody. The reason I won was cos the two chicks on prom commitee sat behind me in business class and were within perfect earshot of all the stupid crap that came out of my mouth everyday and turns out, it was some funny shit well I’ll be! So like one part laziness, one part all me.

Last night at work.

Perez Hilton used to meanly call Jennifer Love Hewitt “Jennier Love Desperate” and I think about that and laugh at myself when I see pictures like this. I know a lot of useless things they need to go somewhere.

We keep the bar pretty dark it’s a nice and flattering swan dive like that so here I’m just taking advantage of all the lit spots I can. We have free pool and wifi.

Wifi and thigh highs.

And baby heads.

Maybe some babes too.

Baked goods we get daily.

Free sass too. I’m working Monday night next fyi. 1631 Dundas St W.

Here’s part of my day. Lamest singapore noodles ever. I ate the entire thing (later on at home) thinking it would eventually get good. Nope. Did not occur. No change. They have always been bad. I guess their specialty is pho and it is only a headache to make this for me. I’m like, with shredded pork too and she goes you want pork instead? I’m like no it’s supposed to already be in it. I am very particular with my singapore vermicelli if you have been reading this stupid blog for years then you know this. I eat it when I’m sleep deprived (hung) it’s basically like polysporin.

Having a killer hair day on the day of your salon visit is like what are you even going for haha. I had roots that needed attending is what. Been dying to see Donna Dolphy Yorkville Salon since before the holidays. Timing salon visits is a science.

Purple sky tonight loved it.

And this morning. It was a really cold day. Didn’t realize how cold up in the sun here. My knuckles bled, that cold and dry when I walked from Yorkville to Spadina noodle town without gloves.

Hello hello.

Best hair ever. I love how she cut it this time, to a point, to give me a bit of a tail and length. She knows how much I whine about not cutting it but it always looks healthy when she does so I abide. You have to relinquish control sometimes.

I love the I dream of Genie blow-out she gave me. That’s from her non-kiss blowdry technique. I turn heads when I leave her salon. Oh yeah my cousin Kristi had an appt with Donna’s sister today too, bonus for Raymi! :)

Oh I see your smirk there babe lol.

Pretty flowers for a pretty salon. Thanks Donna love you! Okay goodnight guys.