bored press send bored press end

Hey player haters. Holy my life is a stupid blur. I have to go on my FB to see if this photo was even used here yet I’ve seen it so much before already. Insert more endless blog complaints about blogging.

SO into this look in fact I gotta collage it bruh. My client was too cos the night of the Oscars he was all (texted) it is spellbinding (my word) how much Kate Winslet and I look exactly the same and I was like, huh now??

You know I googled that the very next morning and was like she even got the hair swoop down good work Kate’s team of stylists who obviously follow my instagram/entire life. Hopefully you will never have to see this picture of me again. I plan to “cover” my dinner at Drake OneFifty I dig it that much and intend to go back until they get sick of looking at me. I like to take pictures of great spaces and I also love a cocktail of theirs called the Rum Diary.

I had steak tartare and oysters. You’re just gonna have to wait til I upload the rest.

Hung out at my friend’s record store near the bar a couple Fridays ago. Very fun vortex night. One for the books? Went all over town and by that I mean like, two more places lol I am old. Do yourselves a favour and look up the time John Lydon was on Judge Judy. Classic. Maybe prep yourself a drink beforehand.

Tony took this of me at Swan Dive the same two weeks ago.

Cray nails. Whenever I hodge-podge them it’s just another thing for me to pick off. You think if I have a gf of mine manicure me I’ll leave them alone? Does that help?

My little wino buddy Heather and I learn a lesson in not putting glasses on the floor. Don’t cry over spilled wine just pour some more.

I’ll post more of this lady friend in time. The reactions kind of get too much tbh. All the people we already have in common LOSE IT knowing she and I “hang out”. People are babies. It’s super foreseeable. I’m an adult baby for life so I should know.

Went for food at this amaze place around the corner I’m not telling cos I don’t want it to be slammed when I go back. It’s a fine line of patronage vs promo on the little gems in the city.

Also the night I wore my cat dress. My outfits are layered and versatile. I also don’t take that many selfies believe it or not, whatever that many means. I just do it all in one night and then feed off those for days while in actuality I look like a disgusting slob behind scenes. FAMILY SECRETS.

Charlie Brown (gigantic) Avocado tree and its one ornament that I got for whining about being an adult on twitter b’y. When losing is winning.

Mike Sent a print of the time I got naked in a box at Lane Studios. It’s nice and big thank you. I bet one of my boys will want it for their wall. I’ll buy you a shawarma when that happens.

Played with an icicle the other day and had the time of my life. Just kidding I immediately threw it in the sink after this picture as it was cold and wet. Please tell me what to draw on that awesomely prepped canvas I am all out of ideas. Something hipster I presume. Haunting. Timely. No irony though we’ve all had enough of that.

Finally made time to go through Tony’s newer prints. Lovely, lovely. Might use that top right one as a profile photo it’s very Alicia Silverstoner, long hair-like. Guy’s got an eye.

Well looky-loo. Another Drake OneFity. I just convinced a client to meet there next week alternatively to a spot he had in mind. Pumped.

That’s what I wore to dinner. When in doubt don’t wear pants. Throw a blazer over it to tie it all in there. Maaaahvelous.

All I did this weekend was relax and eat. Made meals around the clock and watched films. The Salvation is disturbing word to the wise but it is also gripping and you’ll want a tattoo on the side of your temple once you see this one character named Princess who had her tongue cut out yeah I don’t mess around with my cinematography yo.

Went to an apres ski party on Thursday at The Everleigh. If you’re not in the mood to party I swear, things just happen in the universe that annoy you even more, no? That being said I had a good time catching up with “the crew” in “that scene” and as always look forward to the next.

I felt fat and crabby from trying to make an outfit to hide it and turns out I have no ski clothing, who knew lol.

Went to a day event last-last week as well was kind of a whirlwind couple of weeks there that’s why I feel none too guilty when I balance it out by being lazy af. I ate three of those cake pops. Been mad lit in the food dept lately bra. Now I know why it was vocalized once in my family that “no one can understand what Lauren is saying on her blog”. I try to give to all audiences. Just Urban Dictionary any word you don’t undertand or leave a comment about clarification. Don’t be shy.

Was nice to catch up with some old buds on Friday after work. I like Motel too. I like to visit places I used to go to I am constantly romanticizing shit.

My oh yeah I am a singer/musician hat. Shut up! Okay mates we’re getting the band back together. Lets have rehearsal STAT Boylord or bust. Alrighty then gotta scoot sorry if this post was boring af to you. xoxo

gets tiring being inspiring

Hi “everyone”. Here is a “blog post” wrapping up the last couple weeks of my life because why not. I promised the second sexier half of The Darling Mansion feature buuuut my brain needs a break. A me break. A totally, totally ME blog post in-between first mmmkay. I do a lot. I don’t break it down enough. It piles up then consumes me whole goddamn you social media.

Here’s a wee sampler. It still kills me I lost so many photos from my old phone… you’d be surprised how quickly you fill up the card of a new one.

Okay so last week I went to the Drake two nights in a row which is a major social suicide faux pas but my client really likes this place and we had a totally ridiculous fun time so why not. I am getting an age complex so I am starting to feel like a ghost haunting all these haunts I’ve always haunted but now I guess I’m the same age as those I used to hang with when I was younger soooo shut up Lauren it’s okay. I’m not the only Toronto personality out there still givin’er a go so here is to the lot of us.

What the hell (oh I just remembered lol) did I do the night before that resulted in my sleeping all day then waking up and hitting The Drake it was like I was dreaming still thank god my mental alarm clock got me up. I wore two similar black dresses with heels and black tights both nights in a row I was chuffed by the stupidity of myself in doing that Those whom also work in the industry are afflicted by this vampire lifestyle. BTW I’m at Swan Dive this Monday (tomorrow 9-close) come see me and my ballet skills I’ll be picking up beforehand at a fancy pants lesson I’m saying YES to.

The soosh at Drake is always drool-worthy. Kind of why went back again. Plus that damn cocktail menu too. The Rum Diary is my drink of choice fyi.

Drake dress one. Turning into a bit of a shift on me. Yeah yeah, sure sure.

Dress two. That was Friday I believe. My boots need to be shined and I need an insert cos they’re not level and I have no clue what happened other than probably Theater Bizarre walking around in them.

Pre-selfie to make sure I looked legit enough for my client supper. Dress up when you feel like hell and people can barely (never) tell they’re like wow you look so good all dressed up. Party girl tip. Except I have made more effort to dress up on a regular basis to maintain “a look” and overall peer acceptance. There’s a lot of fabulous looking and well dressed people in Toronto the stakes are mega-high you must always be fly.

I just remembered at least 4 other way more important blog posts I should be doing for Raymi Toronto right now instead of this ughhh hahha. Well at least I am blogging instead of Super Bowling. I have my phone lit up for different things I could be at today right now and I am doing a decent enough job at keeping the FOMO at bay.

Then squad goals showed up and I took them to every awful place I could (I’m so sorry!) okay we went to a lot of wins and we also went to a lot of don’ts too. I think I will use one bier markt situation in future stand-up for sure. I am building a set. Forever building a set I get crippling creative paralysis at times when the balance is tilted in the favour of doing practically everything else or other. I watched a fuck ton of movies yesterday that’s for sure.

We went for food at Rock Lobster for hot mess Sunday. I want to invent a hotel that’s check out hours are like 9PM come on bro baby needs to sleep this off.

Note the third (and new!) jar of cherries. That photoshoot takes place at the end of the week somewhere neat ;).

What’s the deal with American Cheese… well I wrote a whole bit around it but everyone said I talked about myself too much. It’s just really bad and really good bad. Good in the bad way. Possibly some irony too. Sometimes I’m just very, very basic. Because I am actually a total fruit loop. Not really Macaulay Culkin bizarre but pretty close.

Total win was at Gusto 101 pure delish. We had a blast catching up and shared a bottle of red which helped with absolute cold asf saunter back to hotel Germain. Snotty little bitches bruv tgif can’t believe was just a week ago boy the time goes.

IG caption: Did you bring enough makeup Lizzy? She’s like OH I just noticed that [how much makeup there was] LOL. I think Hotel Germain retweeted this photo they def called us gorgeous ladies – one and the same haha. They gave me good soshe media surrounding our stay there that’s a niiice.

:) Woah embedding tweets is funtacular.

Donair meat egg cheese breakfast thing on a bun. mmmm. Lizzy had lobster turns out that place IS a legit seafood restaurant and it’s not just an ironic name lol. Whagwan Darryl.

Another “on fleek” look at Swan Dive maybe. I am in the business of complimenting and being complimented.

Tony took this. Rebecca and her pot and my rake and then we made up a dance and I banged the pot like a drum and we are very immature at Swan Dive it is the best time it’s my job to have fun and bang the gong.

Bought three dresses at wieners around the holidays FOR the holidays and I wear them all the time on rotate it’s fun to make looks for Swan Dive you’re like a moving piece of art I almost wore my red gothic riding hood jacket with the red lace dress on Friday but felt it was crazy overload. Rob encouraged it. Which made me hella suspicious.

The 9th floor is where you get ice and they neglected to tell us that which we found to be funny as fcuk.

Love exploring hotels right? Eloise and The Shining complex for life. We went up to the roof for a lookeroonie this is the hotel where the ding dongs stayed when we first met and hung out #memories.

This is my friend Heather and I. More on that later!

Me on Friday. Also taken by Tony I love our in-house Swan Dive photographer. We are blessed. He helped build the bar too. Swan Dive has quickly become a go-to. I work there 9PM on Mondays til close and I open on Fridays as well til 9PM (except for this Friday and NEXT Monday I’ll be in on the Tuesday though instead etc I will keep you in the loop).

Stayed in (a coma) all week then by Thursday was restless plus we knew of this party that we had to go to (should go to) and were happy too then danced ass off at Two Cats with Shanny afterward you’ll see further down this post. It was a big two weeks for sure. And this is only the shit I am showing you not those “lost parts” that go in the vault and didn’t happen what who is talking?

Bunny love. You can see my Fryes and John Lennon bag in the background. The thing started to hump my leg and I was like NOPE BYE.

Some of this food we took to go and I forgot about the part of the night when we were at Weslodge as we made our way back to the hotel. Quite an indulgent weekend and life here for a good time bro.

I had to wear this hat cos my hair was super ratchet when times get tough the tough get creative. By tough I mean too lazy to shower and didn’t plan to go out til like an hour before we went it was go time! I am going to bring so much clothes to Swan Dive for the clothing swap/sale Abra puts together I will also let you know so if you have been eyeing some of my stuff I’ll post what I am parting with. I might have to wear this tomorrow at balleeeeeeeet.

Love this photo of Tanya and I <3. The D Mansion is the tits.

Legendary night I met Courtney I can’t even remember how I got into that rooftop night club on Queen. It’s all in my archives.

Oh Shanny. When we were dancing at Two Cats a guy commented that we were like the two MAD Spy vs. Spy characters in our black and white outfits. VERY astute observation there King west guy. That place is fun. Gong show vortex. We SAW THINGS too politically incorrect to mention heehh.

Thank God for this.

Cirque du soleil is my new outfit inspiration. Suitesoleil was my first hotmail address. Fact. That was during my I am french phase. I was 14?

Woah relax selfie.

Well here we go.

Two cats is on our way home so, why not.

My night vision blows thank goodness for this flashlight I am considering a headlamp. I bet you some joker will bring me one now.

I quite enjoy all my new friends, custies, and regulars. I am social plus booze makes for good talking and times and people with beards and toques that sort of thing. Lots of laugh out loud moments.

We walked to Motel from Swan Dive. I had no hat or pants so to keep warm we loudly talked the whole way there hahaa. Claire and I are the ame age-ish.

When I lived on Dowling I used to go to Motel a lot. I love theme bars. I got stories guy. Maybe now that I am reliving a prior Bukowski phase I can write about that time period again. Interesting.

Reminds me of my Stephen King book consumption phase, derelict scary ghost towns where weird shit goes down wow what a creative mind.

More booze more selfies. Love my ratchet nails kinda works.

That bunny art though.

Had to put him in the friend zone. With all the rest. Heheh.

Great style all around.

Heather and I went to kind of an awful apartment and had the most hilarious experience EVER ever ahahahha. This was on the wall. Our cab driver goes, this building? Oh yes! Bed bugs! What? Bahah.

I dig the stairway to nowhere though and the water fountain and music jamming away ???

Then we walked to Parkdale for a bite.

Never ever a dull moment anywhere in Parkdale. Could not run away fast enough lol.

Then she drank a bottle of red by herself (none for me sober day dude way too necessary) and hoofed it home to do her stuff and things and that’s that for today my friends check you on the flip side! I am the only person not watching the superbowl I think.

just blog

Hey sports fans!

God. Sometimes I wish I was sponsored by Heineken. Whenever I crack one I immediately start to blogging. I always bought Heineken to work to, a 6 pack of green bottle goodness like I’m somewhere further away than where I am. Heineken. The stuff of dreams. I should go back into ad copy. Anyway moving along. How’s your Saturday? Good, good. I just got up from a nap, I got my hair did today, I ate noodles. I’ll show you all about it right now in fact plus some other Raymi world stuff.

Earlier in the week and by that I mean late last week I ventured out to blow off some steam in the hood of the new bar I tend at and it was a crazy night, the end. lol.

Been putting in some late nights lately. It makes it so the days in between you’re kinda like -_- and do nothing, climb the walls a little then wait til you are there doing a late night again. You seeee, my friends opened a bar and new businesses need lots of love. So come by and be sure to love us. Not to sound desperate but I make it a point to keep my look on fleek while at work to practise being a lady and to over-compensate for all my short-comings. So far so good.

My highschool prom date was across the way at the bar here and recognized my aura as I was taking these selfies. He (rightly so!) put it together that I would be the only one taking pictures of themself in the light of a red lamp on Dundas st in Toronto. I’m going to let that sink in and guage how much of a loser I should be feeling like right now about that. Whatever! A zebra can’t change their stripes brah. Prom fact: I unexpectedly got an award for MOST HUMOUROUS PERSON! I got a certificate and everything and had to shuffle across the dance floor under the disco ball in nervous shock in front of everybody. The reason I won was cos the two chicks on prom commitee sat behind me in business class and were within perfect earshot of all the stupid crap that came out of my mouth everyday and turns out, it was some funny shit well I’ll be! So like one part laziness, one part all me.

Last night at work.

Perez Hilton used to meanly call Jennifer Love Hewitt “Jennier Love Desperate” and I think about that and laugh at myself when I see pictures like this. I know a lot of useless things they need to go somewhere.

We keep the bar pretty dark it’s a nice and flattering swan dive like that so here I’m just taking advantage of all the lit spots I can. We have free pool and wifi.

Wifi and thigh highs.

And baby heads.

Maybe some babes too.

Baked goods we get daily.

Free sass too. I’m working Monday night next fyi. 1631 Dundas St W.

Here’s part of my day. Lamest singapore noodles ever. I ate the entire thing (later on at home) thinking it would eventually get good. Nope. Did not occur. No change. They have always been bad. I guess their specialty is pho and it is only a headache to make this for me. I’m like, with shredded pork too and she goes you want pork instead? I’m like no it’s supposed to already be in it. I am very particular with my singapore vermicelli if you have been reading this stupid blog for years then you know this. I eat it when I’m sleep deprived (hung) it’s basically like polysporin.

Having a killer hair day on the day of your salon visit is like what are you even going for haha. I had roots that needed attending is what. Been dying to see Donna Dolphy Yorkville Salon since before the holidays. Timing salon visits is a science.

Purple sky tonight loved it.

And this morning. It was a really cold day. Didn’t realize how cold up in the sun here. My knuckles bled, that cold and dry when I walked from Yorkville to Spadina noodle town without gloves.

Hello hello.

Best hair ever. I love how she cut it this time, to a point, to give me a bit of a tail and length. She knows how much I whine about not cutting it but it always looks healthy when she does so I abide. You have to relinquish control sometimes.

I love the I dream of Genie blow-out she gave me. That’s from her non-kiss blowdry technique. I turn heads when I leave her salon. Oh yeah my cousin Kristi had an appt with Donna’s sister today too, bonus for Raymi! :)

Oh I see your smirk there babe lol.

Pretty flowers for a pretty salon. Thanks Donna love you! Okay goodnight guys.

Don’t kill the awesome.

Hey gang, planet Raymes here on this very wet Wedneday so lets blog through the rain pain, that’s what we do boo. Just get on the bus, Gus and lets see what Raymbo Brite has in store for you.

For instance, the best song by Broods captured on great quality video for you, posterity, and for me. Swoon. Great show. Lots of lesbos there to enjoy and good looking people in general. Did you know Broods were brother and sister?

One half of my kickboxing ring girl outfit has been finalized. The bottoms are already loosening on me (it’s a skinny week) so I might have to try and shrink them but worried they will look all worn out. People are going to be taking pictures of and with me so I must look mint.

Jules happened to be in town so after I wrapped at Naked News we went for some fish and it was fun. I had to get the dinner menu in order to get sashimi access cos I was like bruh I be not eating this rice as there was a pile of it accumulating on my plate haha. Then I could order all these other crazy dishes and hooked Jules up with them. I feel like we really won at all you can eat sushi that day.

The last time I was here my Dutch (ex) bf deleted items and photos from their ipad menu like a f__ing a-hole ahha what the hell guy we get it you’re tech personified can you maybe give it a rest?

Made us mushrooms as a side on the weekend but ate them all before we did the steaks. The (not so) secret is rosemary and red wine.

Also kicked it pilgrim style and made soup from my boiled down chicken stock. My soft boiled eggs for breakfast were not gonna be enough to sustain me so I made a garbage dump vegetable blend that was mega-enriching and tasty. I can be a food witch genius when I wanna be.

Yes I posted an instagram pic of this already. I am still trying to use the camera more often, which I am but there’s definitely a lag in showcasing it here.

After the show is always a magical time. You can process what you just experienced and relax a little while spectating all the other concert-goers level of givin’er. Actually it is quite a high and that’s why people are addicted to live music.

We stood here for the whole show. How do you feel about the slanty floor at the Danforth music hall? I was still able to dancehall music hall. I AM HILARIOUS.

Classic, ornate, Marie Antoinette approved. Bonus that couple is perving out to each other. What does that make me then? They were in my goddamn way I wanted a picture of the venue dude! Haha.

Concert lighting is everything. Once the show is over the magic is all gone.

I have videos of many more beautiful moments I’ll get around to another time but that’s all the coverage for now hope you enjoyed the effort I made for you.

I spy Kat Curtis! Kind of a surreal experience. You forget you’re naked and just do it. Yeah it takes courage for sure. You just have to get over yourself and your fear and go for it.

Positive support system is key too. Being naked does not close doors and should not. It doesn’t have to define you either. It is merely complimentary. You can still be smart, use your brain and intellect as well as be a sex symbol. I was even mistaken as a hobo at the mall, you can be all over the spectrum ahha.

Jules and I went for a walk and took some Toronto tourism shots at City Hall. She wore a pylon on her head and I took Raymazing pics of her. Blah blah Jules rules.

Volleyball scar from last summer. You can see my ankle is a bit swollen still from my Aruba disaster.

It’s my birthday in 6 days. Don’t send presents all at once now.

I love Easter because of the feeling it gives me. Like a nostalgia blast and spring fever all at once. Easter bunnies are pretty cool too. Last Easter I spent in New Orleans don’t worry I can wait til #tbt to rediscuss that runaway weekend haha.

A great store to loiter.

I’m really going to miss my hood. I miss it already. I am happy for where I’m going to but still, the lake and proximity to town. I got through the damn winter and the best time to live here is spring/summer. BOO-URNS.

Did I even get around to posting all the great supper club pics? Ah doye of course not.

Hi Mum. KK TTYL ALL XOXO

BOYLORD NYE live

Tom Green was at the party. Missed him cos after the mosh pit and beer all over me I had had enough. Then I destroyed some 7-11 nachos and cheese and taquitos WOOHOO! It’s hard not to drink when you have a free booze vip bracelet on.

UPDATE! Jenny Lewis quietly approves of Boylord!

Happy New year blah blah.

Thanks Tim! Tragedy is uploading now.

Huntress @ Fashion week pt. II

So, the three musketeers took Fashion Week and feels like the triad will/should be getting up to more of this in the future.

Marois Photography are John and Tracey, you can follow them on twitter (which will be my next social media-ing 101 with them pray for me) @Marois_Kirouac or their FB page Marois/Kirouac-White Photography which is pretty epicly loaded with amazing shots, this was not their first rodeo. They got the best shots of the show because of where we were on the runway. Raymi gets you behind enemy lines. All the other photog were in the pit at the other end of the runway. Sneaky minxes ftw.

I can hold this pose alllll night.

Go team.

I had to take a selfie to get my makeup. Play the game yo. So while it seems sometimes us bloggers are obnoxious on instagram doing blasts at events, it’s for a cause and that cause is lipstick and mascara my two best friends.

We were about to be all squished leaning against the curtain in the corner when O’Nizzle texted me a photo of my reserved seats. A derpy derp that would be me. Thx gyal.

When Elyse discovered I’d be at WMCFW she was like bring my sweater, and I’m like okay but I better not end up carrying it all day in all of my photos. How spectacular is it to have dragonflies blasting on your sweater, moments before you get it back? Or does that happen everyday? I dunno not to be a wizard or anything but I think she can make three wishes now or something.

My mom got photos of every fashionista in this square afterward whereas I got all toronto and beat it out of there and I am too shy to blog them so it’s just me here sorry. Oh wait, this is called Raymi the Minx not Toronto the Minx right? ;)

Necessary.

Uh huh uh huh, fashion. Mhmm mhmm, yep yep yep, got it.

Btw the girl at the lykke li concert is who encouraged me to get a size medium, I am smaller than it appears. I also paired it with an oversized vintage levi’s jean jacket that was my dad’s. When you’re going big keep going. Once this tee shrinks after washing it, it will fit better.

Okay I am getting a little tired of this pose too tbh haha. I always kind of dress like a chic slob IMO at fashion week cos in my mind I am like This is so hip and so cool how did all these people know what cool was until they saw this outfit I made zero effort in preparing for them. If you have real style and you are reading this you are allowed to roll your eyes. Next year I will bring it. The noise I say. Consider it brought and waiting for you. New poses too! Get ready.

I miss doing photography like this. Swoon. Thanks for carrying the torch ma.

I should have thrown that bottle in my bag ;). Oh what, what perfume huh? Look over there it’s Bo Jackson. #gone

Nice toes. Okay that’s the best of the rest I gotta get back to Raymeality now. If you missed pt. I here it is: all thighs and eyes. Hope to see you tomorrow night for an epic Halloween Party at Brass Vixens. I’m dancing! It’s gonna be sexy and weird.

I finally figured out my song too. See ya tomorrow night!