Bragger’s paradise

We had to get milk. I dressed like it was a runway competition aka like Aladdin. We’ll be back here tomorrow for more B roll footage and scene shots. Exciting.

Jump suit!

LOL. Doot doot doo what am I a chimney sweep? YES!

It’s hard taking pictures with your left and the touch screen. I have always had secret tattoo agendas to have just a tiny part peeping out, on Blythe it’s her cute barbie legs. Now this wrist, a tail. I can put it over my face like those STUPID moustache tattoos lol. Just kidding I can haz not be a hater.

Stella gets Queen/Dufferin nervous so I thought I’d sort her nerves out by getting her all riled up at the dog run and turns out the dog walking freaks were there and their big bully dogs it was a hilarious time.

Cool order, flickr.

We saw them before at the park and Stella wanted to play so I walked us near pretending to be following Stella, which, I was. But they seemed too official and it was harshing my mellow so we bounced, “Mummy has to work.”

It’s nice to get out for a bit in the morning I love it. They were all teaming up on the labradoodle, cos he’s the “constant” of the pack and they all want to fight for pack dominance. Dog world is like in the wilds. I liked seeing the curly one get attacked, he liked the attention anyway. My shoes got muddy and I got to pick up Stella’s crap using a purple bag with mini white hearts dotted all over it cos the other dog freak needed my bag for his gargantuan dog crap yeah thanks pal! Lol. I almost got taken out by the running stampede herd 30 times cos I was in the tiny through-high-traffic way. I feel like a fraud with all these dog folk and inwardly panic that they will find me out about being a dog newb plus Stella doesn’t help me out at all in any shape or form when she gets spooked and rips me down the street like the Apocalypse is after her. Bye guys see ya later!

Not bad eh.

There’s some real artists out there.

Lady Garbage was licking My Friend. It was adorably retarded and I missed capturing the action. They’re so modest.

Rick put these all together by hand. He showed me once.

I have an Ikea idea lets get a new fucking mirror!

I am going to Sarah Connor my tricep it’s going to be disgusting.

THIS IS WHAT MEIN BRAIN LOOK LIKE O_o! AGH! lolll

Can you imagine getting punched in the face by me now! The last thing you see before darkness is the slinky minx tail, pow. That’ll look good in work out videos.

Courtney is a hot mess right now, Teacher and I had a fight. I needed a breather so we went out as trainwrecks last night and I brought Courtney to Jupiter. We also went to the Thompson as well, which is a whole other planet unto itself lol. Saw Odie, Stephen was holding us up so we missed him, “I want to introduce you to Lanny! Order drinks on me.” like fifty texts sorry missed you Courtney and I looked like lesbian slobs. Everyone was staring it was hysterical. We started out at the Caddy and it was all downhill from there.

Google this word and THEE SHALL FIND ME.

Serious Unicorn brains in a jar.

All spilled out OMG no. I got a million other pics of these with flash from another hang out there.

Speaking of trainwrecks what do you think about Courtney’s (lol not my Courtney, LOVE, Courtney) latest thing on stage? Man she hates Grohl but I think what she meant about food off Frances’ table she meant her own, right? And sorry maybe the one redeeming thing about you once was Kurt so lay off the poor sod holding up the photo of him.

That’ll show ya to get in ma grill all damn day #dogownerhumour I’ll take you to the dog run and have all these dinosaur sized dogs chase the hell out of you then terrify you under the Dufferin bridge aww she’s all curled up in a sunbeam on the couch now.

Ok one more can’t get enough.

We were going to throw this out. May come in handy.

And this candle is from the night we drank Jack Daniels, that green one is from the Pinot Noir and so on.

Bright colours bring brightness in to your life.

Next up, Harth Fest part II mess!

Ha ha what a party slut. I WAS WORKING! It. That’s for sure.

Dude, is that a cod piece?

What happens at HarthFest Stays at Harth Fest. Kind of.

LOL.

oh well whatever nevermind

I want to blast all my pics up as usual but I also want to write my creative blabbity blahs along with so it’ll have to wait. This photo (above) was my UNKLE/radiohead video homage.

“That’s no way for a ladybear to be carried to the Teddy Bear Picnic!” from stew. I said, “IT IS NOW. especially since a guy was shot and murdered in this very spot 30 minutes later.”

“this is totally random but. a friend of mine was tagged in your photo and I recognized you from last night at toronto underground cinema. you absolutely rocked. I saw you perform smells like teen spirit and loved it. you were very entertaining. I did vocals for it much later in the night..like 3am haha it was fun!
I also adore your fuzzy animal sweater thing. you’re lovely “

I pull my shirt down halfway through and lose the bear suit, they loved it, made some new fans, was wicked. Have another performance too on video I’ll save for a rainy day. I couldn’t hear myself at all, had amnesia on the lyrics every four seconds. Teen spirit is the one song I tune out instantly when it comes on from over-playing it as a teenager it’s now like the Michael Jackson of Nirvana songs, you know the words but you don’t because you’re so certain that you’ll just know them. They had lyrics up for us that people moshed to shreds, I kicked a little Johhny Rotten at ‘em too. I’ve got 186 mystery camera pictures to share but I’m going to the brickworks pic-a-nic for 12ish. Had I known it would be 12-“ish” I’D BE IN BED STILL OMFG 0_o. We ended the night in Mcdonald’s, the parkdale one. Don’t think I saw one smile. In the streets though, I terrorized everyone and RAWR’ed at them. WAS very fun and well-received. Bumped into loads of friends and freaks, I love Nuit Blanche. I missed going up to U of T, that’s my fav NB stomping ground, did anyone else check it out?

Then I hung out with Vincent Gallo.

Punk overtook my body. Juicebox said I won for best outfit.

If I can’t show my nipples I will find a way around that.

They had full on bondage going on back here, Doug showed me a video of it. Puts our little cheeky fun innocent burlesque acts in a whole new safer category now, wow. A girl was hanging upside down from the ceiling, bound in ropes, naked, hardcore.

Have any questions for David Suzuki for me? Yesterday on twitter I said I would be all over David Suzuki like Mario and Tanooki and then everyone called me Tanooki last night. I even turned to stone when a fireball bounced at me and I survived thanks to my suit (nintendo joke you probably wouldn’t understand). That’s Eyeborg interviewing me, the first thing I ran into on our way out, can’t wait to see the video. I drew an orgasm and talked about sex. I’m sure it was their best interview. Bears have lots of opinions. This goes along with my new rule: don’t do anything unless it is filmed (in some capacity). My excellence is a waste if no one gets to see it and possibly forward it along Steven Spielberg.

I went wild in Bellwoods and narrated NOW WHEN BEARS ARE IN THEIR NATURAL HABITAT SUCH AS THIS BELL-WOODS PLACE, AN ANIMALISTIC URGE WILL OVERTAKE ME, I MAY GET A BIT AGGRESSIVE SO WATCH OUT. I kill me. Kay bath time.

Drawing a Nuit Blank

rape me from raymi lauren on Vimeo.

PITCHFORK MEDIA also caught wind of it now. HUGE!

LOOK FOR ME DURING NUIT BLANCHE HERE I’ll be belting out Smells Like Teen Spirit over and over again until I throw in the towel. Gonna be wicked. The Juicebox kids invited me as a notable, we habitually engage in intermedia fuckery together (they also won a yacht fishing trip on my uncle’s boat at my 10 yr anniversary party) so I know it’ll be a slam dunkeroonie. I’m going to dress exactly like Kurt. Or maybe polar opposite and go Tinkerbell.

The above video is about 3 or 4 in the morning at the Central and I am balls to the wall obliterated, Teppei is on drums, clem is filming it and there are girls dancing all over the place. Meredith’s comment upon watching this was, how’s that feel? must feel great! It did and does. My tights are all slashed here and this was after a shift I believe. Good times that bar, my Kingdom for 8 months. The shirt is a gift from an internet admirer, it’s from UO before anyone else wore puffy sleeves, before they arrived at H&M or Lady Gaga’s adoption of it. FTW! ME!

SEE YOU SOON!

Hey Raymi!

We’ve met a few times through Exclaim / Torontoist / Juicebox. And we
won a trip on your uncle’s fishing boat last winter at that Wrongbar
party.

So we have this thing that started as a joke a few years ago and now
it’s real: we’re doing an art instillation for Nuit Blanche that
consists of us performing “Smells Like Teen Spirit” over and over and
over again for 12 hours.

http://www.scotiabanknuitblanche.ca/iProjects.aspx?zone=C&mapId=24

It’s happening at the Toronto Underground Cinema (Spadina and Queen).
Nuit Blanche is Saturday, October 1, and runs from 7pm to 7am.

We’re looking for a few BIG NAMES!!! to come by and sing one or two
reps of the song. In return, we offer the opportunity to be a part of
something outrageously stupid.

Any chance you think this is bizarre / funny enough to get involved?
The plan is to have “notable folks” sing at the top of every hour. We
don’t need a firm commitment, since it’s obviously kind of a
clusterfuck of an idea, but if you’re in town, planning to walk around
that night anyway, and want to throw your name into this mess, let me
know. We’ll iron out details closer to the date, and if you can’t make
it or just end up not showing up… It’s fine, since we’re playing the
song 144 times no matter what.

Let me know what you think!

Sam