Ready for more emo Europe? Well good then because that is what you are getting much to the chagrin of other shit I have to do and well, sleep. I just gotta do it. When you are a crazy writer and you don’t pleasure write, your words become poison inside of you and guess what the only release is? Pleasure writing. Like how I once said the antidote to men, is more men. Like a coin with two heads.

Licorice brains. I wanted to buy this for the office but it was so heavy.

Although in hindsight it’s so much more hilarious and possibly appreciated. My dutch clogs are sprinkled throughout the office, dutch clogs and mini porcelain pill jars (vitamins, tylenol). It’s like my tradition now to go to this one store and buy a pile of crap because I like lighting money on fire.

It’s pure junk through and through though, pure junk squared.

Goodbye my friend. Impatient bf was like come on wtf hurry. Um, it’s just, oh I don’t know.. beautiful! No you wtf! I feel like my life is a non-stop dialogue cross between New girl and 2 broke girls. Oh, also, that show Girls too. AND LAST NIGHT, NEW GIRL QUEEN BEE Zooey Deschanel RETWEETED MEEEEE BTW!

Don’t worry, I know what my follow-up is gonna be. With a 35% chance of tankage.

Last night, or one of them. Three last nights count as your last night. Compliments of the house. Everyone when I instagrammed this photo was like OMG WHAT IS THAT “Yum” and OMG TELL MEEEEE NOW! Uh, relax bro it’s just mustard.

He made me bartend for him/us for a laugh cos I was requesting music so much, backfired though cos I sucked and had no idea how to respond to Dutch directions plus was drunk. He was going to the Caribbean in a few days so had island don’t give a sh– brains plus is awesome in general. Students came in for RUSH or whatever and their leaders told him to make them do bar work and he made them clean LOL. It’s one of my favourite bars and we’ve only been a few times but he remembers me and knows my bf/our friends/and sister too + he squeezes my arm while laughing exceptionally loud and crazy after making whatever joke he just made about me/us/it/that and everyone else immediately laughs too. Meanwhile, all these crazy things are happening around us at the time PLUS you can get free postcards there. And well look at him. Awesome.

Ehhhh. I instagrammed this and it is just as bad there. I LOVE THESE PEOPLE.

OH BEHAVE LAST DAY EMO. Oops caps. It still stands though.

We went to Germany on a Sunday (I believe) as one of our last milestones to do, to a restaurant we’ve been to many times but never before at night. It felt more magical that way.

I am the only English speaking person for every 5,000 so that lends a bit of intensity to the experience too.

Germany is cheaper than Holland to eat. However, your dollar does no go as far there.

Have a sweet night or something like that, can a German person translate thank you.

Bread for my ducks which we ate later on at home instead

I love everything about this place. In the summer time we rented a paddleboat out back. We became one with our duck and water fowl friends, it got intense!! I had to use my flip flop for protection and we were both in bathing suits.

I’d say this would be The Drake if they had a summer time Muskoka place Except this is in the middle of nowhere in Germany, a hotel resto with a lake and palm trees. A fireplace indoors and so much seating space, heat lamps and a dining are down below. I should be writing restaurant copy.

Huge bowl of bread you didn’t order, perfect for olive oil dipping at home. You order a salad cos you want to eat light then they bring you a bakery. We also eat it with salami later on.

I love baked things but they take ten yeas to cool down. You always burn your lips and/or insides of your mouth though.

This is what I like to call it’s a hotel thing. Decor is infinite.

Omg I spilled the beans. Oops. Psh. (it works though).

This drink was fabulous though.

Darling croquettes. Brought with mayonaise in teeny ice cream cones. WHATTTTT?




Oliver Twist was here.

It looks like a cruise ship.

Aaaaaaaand cut to Amsterdam. Weirdest upload ever, scattered, why I’ve avoided doing this.

Good times though. This fudge I bought was so weak, stale. I got Scamsterdammed.

By a palace of some sort.

Xmas lights. sigh

Honk honk ooh sassy.

I have a sinking feeling.

This store was out of control.

And yo were not allowed to take pictures. I did anyway.


These stalls to my right are special Christmas things. Charming. Fun.

My first xmas abroad.

Epic wine boxes.

Yikes and goodnight LOL. This is my Hunter S Thompson-ing.

Ski chalet beer garden ftw.

UFO heat lamp.

To be continued. ps. no-kay is a word I invented bye.

(I’ll edit this tomorrow).

from wallpaper to heartbreaker

The last supper. Yes from a million years ago. That is how behind and busy I’ve been, I flew back from Holland on Jan 16 and it’s oh look, February 16 – it only takes about a month for me to “do things”. Shall we then…

Lovely place, she.

Punk rock linen service.

I miss this place. Everything about it.

And that guy.

I love this restaurant, we’ve dined here before on the patio over summer. The food is quite good. We were the only people eating here and likely the first customers for service that day.

It is always a good sign when amuse bouche is brought out. These were wasabi something or other, sorry don’t remember it is too long ago.

I look psyched.

There is a hotel above this place too, it’s very boutique yet un-pretentious. Well maybe a little.

I had rabbit uh, something. Doesn’t matter not like you can go eat it anyway lol. I like how they went goth with it.

Some kind of steak, sure yeah.

He bought me this necklace in Germany from a weird renaissance faire we went to in the springtime and I left it behind for some odd reason.

SIGHING my brains out right now haha. They even got the olives right.

A glass full of feelings.

It rained a little bit too like the hugest cliche buzzkill ever.

I bought new boots today cos I got tired of looking like a skin. Although I do admire the look and overall aesthetic there too. I think something black is due, and why not make a little wardrobe upgrade?


Weird vacant vestibule area betwixt the hotel and resto bathroom and coat area. Good place for a mirror.

I uploaded these in a frenzy and have barely looked over anything. I’ve scattered shit around.

It will be one year in March. Time feels differently gauged in a long term thing’er though.

They brought out extra steak, we thought it was funny.

I am trying to remember what the hell this is, it’s not tartar. Hopefully there’s a pic of the menu coming up. Bf might remember. That brown ball is a date I’ll tell you that though.

Oh my god I forgot how much I love fries. And the dips. Dutch are big on dips.

He was making fun of how sad I saw, I think I cried a billion times.

The thoroughness of these pictures are hilarious to me right now.

Here’s a receipt from a buncha crap we bought. Tell me what we bought.

Guess we had a salad too.

Which was quickly massacred from that.

And he had mushrooms.


I must have enjoyed my hair day.

This was tartar, I loved it.

Okay we get it.

V lovely.

Okay, pumpkin time. Til next round in Amsterdam. PEEEEACE.

Last night a blogger saved my life

HI! God. I have missed blogging but I just couldn’t. I had to write an overdue thing (I have still 2 more other things to do but am taking tonight for myself to blog that’s that) and had been putting it off for various (and real) reasons and so if I blogged I’d be feel sheepish. Which sucks a little because I have found that blogging actually helps me do the things that I need to do because I get it out of the way, the nagging guilt bubble pops and then I can do the legit shit. Sigh anyway, here I am now and enough of the explanations.

I also had to go through these winners and try to figure out where I left off. I know I put some on my tumblr, I almost just blogged a bunch I already did weeks ago. God can you imagine that, two posts with identical pictures but wildly different captions and rambling stories? I bet you actually can imagine that.

This feels like a lifetime ago. It was I guess. There’s so much immediacy in the world and now now now news online that we don’t really talk about things that happened last week and no one cares at all after a month.

My hair seems so much shorter too. I don’t know if I posted this and it’s not even exciting, it’s just a, moment in time kinda thing.

We are on the way to Germany and this is going backward in time, it was my last day and it had that last day vibe all over it.

It didn’t snow once while I was there and it barely snowed in The Netherlands at all this winter, only in certain areas and only a teeny bit. Breaking weather records this winter, the mildest in centuries or decades.

Ah you can see a windmill in the mirror. I am so sick of winter and my dry hands, my lips are always dry – so dry it started bleeding at the mall the other day wtf thanks.

Car rides when you have a camera you just snap away.

Hmm. This was my last day, the Germany thing was my last-last day I dunno but this was my last day for real. Who cares ya ya but this was the last meal. I’m gonna make that its own post because I don’t want it lumped together with my boring car photos that I somehow stretched into 4 separate posts.

This is me right now btw see how quick my hair grows now that it’s not platinum?

Me today also. That shirt I bought is a bit (way) too big I felt like I was in a night gown. BRB with more!

Raymi abroad continued

Continuing now with my nonsense of things from abroad, here is my last Friday night in Holland. They had that edible paper pasted to our bread and I’m covering the name because I am private like that. Anyway I tasted it and it was like very fine barely even paper bland/remniscent of the bread flavour in taste. That sentence fuckin sucked, sorry.

I love this place for various reasons, multiple sentimental levels that if I typed them out you’d just big fat “oh so what” yawn at me for it. It’s a shower then it’s a grower but it still agitates you a bit because after final dinner service it turns into a night club, the energy is palpable to you as you dine and especially on a Friday night. It’s an influential vibe as in, you drink.

Then another night he had a croquette and beer craving, one of those days you just eat nothing satisfying I suppose so we went out late to this one somewhat local place, we threw maybe ten euros in coins into this and lost it all pretty fast but the best part was watching two dudes come in and play a machine each and you could tell they were on a tear, a full Euro tear. People watching in Europe is 1000% more interesting especially if you know what country they come from because they are so much closer to it, and all those things you’ve heard about this such and such a person or that becomes live before your very eyes. I can’t describe it, I won’t. It’s just good.

Same place. We came here one of my first nights too. They only let us leave with our tall boys instead of serve us beer there. Funny laws in Europe and loop holes everywhere. This night however we made it in time and it was packed with truck drivers, lots of Polish ones and other east Euro kinds. It’s infuriating not being able to understand anybody because my boyfriend erupts in laughter every other minute and I’m like WHAT?? WHAT!? And he has to continue listening because it’s so good whatever they’re saying and by the time they’re done we have to whisper talk because they notice we’re watching, and the moment is over.

This was my last Thursday. We visited our favourite park, the one with the trees and flowers and the necklace and our only other social life, the ducks we fed since they were ducklings.

Everything we did this week was tainted with emo because I was leaving soon. No snow though bro.

bf asked if my outfit was a Canadian flag ahhaha.

A girl at work was wearing similar Pumas to these today except with extra embellishments and flare. I pointed them out and commented. I left behind ALL of my shoes from spring. It feels like being a divorced kid.

Then when something cute happens or we laugh we’re like aw ahahahh then sad because wah going to miss that. He pretended he was filming me so I was all berserk wtf.

5 papes left warning/calling card.

Me in Germany with my friend.

Now we are in Germany on my last Tuesday. I only know this from hanging up a calendar and Flickr tells me the date the photo was taken (the 14th), quite handy that. I flew the sixteenth so depression was at an all time high.

Peach/pink gorgeous place is where that yuppie told us to eat.

Considered the Ratskeller lol.

Looking over the menu, smoking.

La vie. Agree.


He’s emo, I relate.

Attention span over plus Dateline is on PEACE!!!!

this speaks to my heart

My static blog was keeeeeling me. Plus, I have a couple things to do that I “can’t” from winding down after work so one hand blames the other. I feel like if I personal blog, me-blog, like “I’m in trubs” because I did something but not the priority things. But maybe I need to personal blog to open up the creative flood gates and make way for the to do. Which I can’t quit whining about. I think after jet lag then confronting post vacay blues, emo acceptance and thrust into moving stress as well as back to work getting into the groove of (which am happy to report: all is good there) I needed to just, do those things. Period.

I uploaded 500 photos from abroad like a mad man and it’s starting to give me Obsessive Compulsive Disorder anxiety and worry “I will forget” #neverforget.

So here are photos from my last night, in Germany, the night before I left. My last supper. At a Deutschland potato place. Don’t get me started on the food. It’s really good, I will just leave it at that. BORINGLY that. Hee.

Imagine Yogurt with a J. It is real. Jogurt. It’s cute.

Hispanic prawn what? This is english provided menu, thank god. Reading German is like reading a made-up cartoon language on the care bears. I dunno. I know that’s really ignorant, but words are just SO LONG.

I had Fanta vodka. YOLO

Those are good signs for British people.

You’re kidding me. Love it.

The tables were covered in papers, so many menus, we were sitting in wooden church pew-like booths and everything had that old classic look and feel to it. Authentasia.

The outside. We ran around lost for a long time getting colder and colder and finally I made us ask someone and then we found this place. It’s like finding a giganticer Yorkville, Distillery, Old Mtl, etc. BUT real deal Germania.

And you don’t understand a thing.

A yuppie told us to go here. His kinda place. Okaaay. linen service place. I guess it’s a compliment. It had more of a work drinks vibe to it.

Cuckoo clock shit like this everywhere. My favourite.

A lone man smoking here, I doubled back and took a photo of the lemons, the moment.

That’s the man there. Each tiny place was cookie cutter Paddington bear set in nature.

Like seriously.

Took quite a bit to settle/decide on where to eat. This was a cafe that boasted, like, Timothys, but was really a restaurant, a proper one. I’m not a picky eater anymore, just selector. Because I hate being settled then realizing you’re in a hole or their menu is ridiculous. Food snob all the way forever more and nothing but. Deal with it.

Forgot to bring smokes, bf had to buy some here. They have cigarette machines everywhere here in abundance like the 70’s. 80’s. Super time warp.

Sure. A spot light behind a terra cotta Jesus’ biblical times water vase, cliche whatever have fun.

Okay that is good. It’s so nice there.

Lots of Gothic black roofs. It’s their thing. You can tell by the stripe in their flag.

Moving over to Holland, I discovered this particular favoured way of marketing this particular feature film. #interesting. and #goodluckwiththat does it work?

Speaking of Germany, had just gotten back from there this evening.

I left this coat for sister. She doesn’t know that yet.

What I had for Linner in Germany. I thought I ordered something more mexican but received gyro Greek. Okay then. I still love this place.

Huge burgers if Big Macs were flat and round like massive saucers.

Catching up on my local fashion cultures.

This was before NYE, we were like hmm what to do/want to do that but we are old. Still it was fun and exciting. I’m a big fan of “before” anticipation. I’m sure you love a pre-game too.

Classic retro repro posters hang everywhere, mirrors so you can spy on everything and person. We came in during a Vanilla sky sunset. Can’t forget the magic of Christmas ornaments donning everything everywhere.

That’s a festival bracelet. Tiny bolts are on the other side, stacked.

He explained this one to me but I forget. Go for it.

Dick Tracy lights.

Sith Lord what.

Jesus. Ballin’. I always do a good 2 avocados a week from the couch. Rock salt and lime guy.

My last Friday in Holland, went for a Fridate bender and that’s my beloved tree in the back yard and it was misting. Then my hat fell in a puddle. Hehaha.


Baha don’t ask. Bottom left is what gingerale looks like over there and it’s hard to find but has since been easier or they order more at our grocery store finally.

This is back in Holland now.

Yep I look stupid it is not just your imagination but maybe no game is my game.

I love this part of Holland.

I am tired now/need to move along. To be continued. Oh, I’m up for a travel category blog award now as well as life time achievement and life. ZZzz bye!

not everything but a lot of things

Here’s a post I began, don’t know when, but abandoned sure enough off to somewhere with no time to spare. I’m back now in Canada and completely brain fried. Yay. I know that I hated my prawn pasta dinner but was too much of a priss to send back so I soldiered through. This was my last Friday in Holland. Sigh. Guess I’m still a delicate infant in denial. Glad to be back at work to occupy me of course, and be social. I go back Monday.

More soon!

The blog must go on

Lets begin again somewhere in the middle.

Hi Liz!

She painted this shoe it’s on her twitter header @artwaif. One of the many highlights of reading her blog was when she went to Burning Man and seeing her preparations for that. Girl crafts, yo. Hoola hoops, glitter, paint, etc. OKAY BACk TO ME NOW.

I got to be a hand model for work did I tell you? Always keeping those bad boys in check.

A few days before NYE.

Raymi Lauren.

Amazing. I was jealous. So much is going on with this burger. A pineapple? WTF I would throw that off. The smokey burger plus the warm tandoori creamy sauce blew my mind, and it’s open face and messy as hell. He ordered it.

I had a tosti and because the spicy-peppery thinly sliced salami was charcuterie-level and the sandwich was pressed thin, I wasn’t jealous of his lunch for very long. I try to eat super light if at all in the day since we gorge all night long.

These stairs are daring. The side at the right is so thin it’s like walking on a ledge, you must pay attention to your feet at all times it’s like a paper fan, hard to convey go see for yourself. I am a recovering foot injured person, falling is a new paranoia added to my list of hypochondria. Fact: I am accident-prone.

I call this: Elitist PR girl porn.

I call this: Desperate housewife.

Dutch bathroom time. Futuristic retro and Japan-like. Sidenote: I have never been to Japan but I have a Hello Kitty complex.

Efficient. Very common typical and the button on the wall too. I love toilets here because they are huge and you can fill it up with all the tp you want. I’m sorry but I make mountains.

AHHH see.


Stuff like this inspires me forever. It’s like dopamine looking at and romanticizing surroundings you escape to in your dreams.

I love you. I love Eu. I love Europe.

Oh you know just a house castle just around the corner.

It was a lovely day. I really love this house. This style, it screams English cottage. His mom was just here and gave me some bg info on Holland, it is largely French inspired actually and Napoleon had his fingers all over it. His brother was the King and lived in this palace in Amsterdam btw. Then all of his siblings became a queen or a king. What a crazy time that would have been.

Good timing on this film. Football hooligans.

End of year errands were done in the evening. They call New year’s eve-eve Old year. It’s confusing hearing people talk sometimes, their expressions are amusing. On NYE I could not for the life of me think of ONE example of an English expression (two birds one stone for example) but now they’ve all come flooding in. I said that the Dutch speak in riddle all the time “expressions” and they said no they do not. I dunno, whatever it keeps you on your toes.

Then he got a haircut.

I bought perfume (it’s really weak) and this bottle is almost empty.

This was hangover from NYE, the morning after old year. Aardappelschotel – holland potatoes with German ham. Fried eggs over them. Was good and filling, I didn’t eat too much.

A chick I work with hooked me up with a bunch of jerk spice marinades. She gets me. We marinated these legs for three days, we ate one batch but knew we would be hung after new year’s eve. Planning in advance is key to party.

I don’t know if I blogged this. Look how bossy I look. She’s trying to plug her ear from the firework explosions the men were setting off right outside. God that was an experience alright.

Left these here in the spring and I don’t think I even wore them once. Canada infiltrating yeah!

Dressing the part for the sojourn to Germany.

The tree is gone now.

If I ever sell bibles I will keep this outfit in mind.

Trying to remember if you have blogged an instagram photo before or not is tough. I try to be thorough, it is annoying. I am just trying to be a better blogger. Isn’t that cute and virtuous? If anything, this creation is a gift to myself to preserve all of the awesome I ever did and loved.

We have talked about this one before. I was surprised how small it was. Van Gogh is the one who cut off his ear. What a weirdo. I draw the line well before self mutilation.

I’m going to go eat a handful of that meat right now and press publish because It’s time to stretch these legs and straighten this hunch. Have a great I can’t believe that it’s Friday. RLW.


Euro continuation continueth. I uploaded these, last week? Anyway who cares, don’t have much time now even to do this cos I am finally going shopping today and I am pumped.

We went for lunch in this town I have been to several times before, it’s nice to town hop and be elusive to people you may or may not bump into plus it adds travel factor for my bf, maybe? ps. at night these xmasy things look like this. we drove through before looking to eat but the place was swarming with party peeps. Weren’t into it.

To the left is the resto we chose, we ate there in the spring/summer just before we left for Canada. I wore the same striped shirt both times, what are the odds. Actually the odds are rather good because my euro wardrobe always seems to be limited.

Giving you a feel for it.

Bike nation.

One Canadian dork coming right up.

The Hello Kitty bar. People sit on the inside with the heaters and they can smoke in there but it’s not smokey like you’d expect. It’s super fun and the vibe was v holiday, I much enjoyed watching tables of geezers drink and blather on to one another. I thought of my grandpa.

First we sat inside.

Then a table popped up. Behind me was a line of people (grey haireds) and I’m sure were quite inquisitive of my picture snap/posing. It’s called being a tourist. Deal with it.

Sister got me this scarf, she has one too and also one for her bestie. The year of scarves. Kind of like when big necklaces were my thing, you can just wear a lame H&M tee but a big accessory makes it look like you made effort.

Dutch mom gave me a suitcase of beauty products. Love it.

This is the shirt I wore here last time. Heh. You ever get caught doing that or go into a store wearing merchandise from it and feel like a total dweeb like omg everyone is going to notice. No one notices/cares, everyone is self-involved.

Resistance is futile. I resisted. My wrap didn’t require mayo and I dipped my fries in its sauce instead. Score one me.

Dutch goths keeping the dream alive. You do you.

Our table lamp. Adorablah.


hers. I ate this last time too and it was a miracle to recall what it was that I ate previously, cos I knew it was awesome but what the hell was it? Tandoori wrap, but you think it was written in English on the menu? NEWP.

Grolsch is the Molson Canadian of Holland. Drinking it back home is like, yeah cool but to be where it hails from is neat.

Teeniest ice rink ever but cool and they built a bar for the parents. Of course they did.

Whee Christmas light tree.

Some days later we went out early to do some errands.

One of these days I’ll manicure up.

Morning hair/face. Slathered on lip gloss to be less disgusting in the face.

It’s just so sticky.

I like this road, err highway. Two lanes in a valley.

Be careful of 600 deer.

Errand one found me pretending to read Dutch magazines while my bf had a quick meeting. I was scared someone would start talking to me and realize for the last ten minutes I was pretending to read and they’d know that because I’d be all, in English please. Lol. No one spoke to me, just smiled curiously.

It was lunch hour too so all the jokers came out to mingle and eat and I thought about my office. Time is flying by I’ll be back in 9 days.

Then we went for lunch.

But I gotta get in the shower now sorry to leave you hanging. Stay warm Canada I hear it’s brutal over there. Here it is mild and we broke records yesterday and today for that. Makes up for the cold ass spring I endured before here.

Check ya laterrrrrrrrrrr.