I just realised the furnace people are coming today to service that shit. This means i have to stick around between the hours of 1 and 5. Well i guess it doesn’t really matter ‘cos i know the second they show up i’ll be in the backyard or the bath or whatever and i won’t hear the door. Story of my life.




$10 – pizza money

$80 – cabs

$10 – gift

$4 – breakfast

$55 – army shit

$3 – Burger King

$6.75 – TTC

$15 – gave it away

$35 – more cabs

$126 – jacket

$70 – Honest Ed’s

$6 – Tanning salon

$63 – Hat/scarf

$5.15 – Tallboys

$20 – steak and other crap from KoS

$20 – hair dye shampoo/conditioner

$12 – smokescoffeewater

$8 – sox

$19 – groceries

Where my money has gone over the past month. Well, only the purchases i can remember.


How do i dispose of a huge box of styrofoam puffs?




I’m pretty psyched to see i am sixth on the list when you search for homeless people and there dogs in toronto pics BUT i am more psyched to see that i am the only one who knows when to use “their” instead of “there” or “they’re”


i love my life.

Today it is all about being tired and cranky and wearing halloween costumes all day long and eating stale muffins and grease and pizza and not walking for longer than three minutes. i think i am in love with the sound of jet engines and fingernails on chalkboards. Unnngh… Did you know that i am thinking of opening my own cheesy themed sex hotel? It’s true.


Disorder Rating
Paranoid: High
Schizoid: Low
Schizotypal: High
Antisocial: High
Borderline: Moderate
Histrionic: High
Narcissistic: High
Avoidant: Moderate
Dependent: Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive: Moderate

Click Here To Take The Test



i am so sore from last nite. i said so many dumb things. i fell into a prickle bush and scratched my hand. i smashed a beer bottle and this guy came out with no shoes on. watched gummo and felt weird. tried to sleep but couldn’t. tried to buy cigarettes but couldn’t. i was talking to lamp posts and parked cars. i was so hungry. didn’t even make it to the warehouse party. there were so many things i had to tell everyone.



what i did for thanksgiving…


Hmmm. This isn’t as cool as that other drinking song/video but still, it’s ok. You might have a seizure from all the flashing things but then you start to relate to all the images and then everything makes sense. Trust me. the beer song



yes and by the way I am number 1 when you search for classy lazy fat impulsive – what the fuck do you think about that? I think it is a wonderful accomplishment. I do.
Unfortunately, I am only on the seventh page when you search for gross nasty fucked up pictures. Meh. Can’t win ‘em all.


Jamie was drunk last nite and called me at work from New York City. He drank three-hundred margaritas and the girl he was with hit on some guy or other and he jumped in a bush and then ran away. i dunno. i only pretend to be paying attention to people when they speak to me on the telephone around two in the morning. Jamie rules because Jamie makes
HOT FUCKING ART AND PHOTOGRAFFS and there are even some of me. i know i said this before but i don’t care.


I am done sucking your dick now.





Why aren’t you a super model?


Because i am insecure and not skinny enough and i am only 5’9 and I am nineteen. Too old.


Don’t you work in that fashion district area though, why haven’t you been discovered?


Becuase I ride my bicycle past those fancy people really fast and i don’t like to look people in the eye. If they said something I wouldn’t believe them.


You seem to be a very proud person.


I know it seems that way. I can’t help it. That is my defense mechanism. Really I am sensitive and even television commercials make me cry.


Do you have a boyfriend?


no comment.


Do you want to be famous?


Yes


Why?


Because i can’t stand being not-popular


You are writing a book? What is it about and how far are you?


Hmm. 100k in an email if it were cut ‘n pasted. It’s about me. And my life. Like this blog except I am more candid. I tell-all. But I change names. You will learn things about me that not everyone knows.


And who the fuck should care?


This is a hard question for me to answer. Can I get back to you?


No.


Ok well this is the last question I am answering. I have things to do.


Alright then.


People should give a fuck because there are enough snotty celebrities out there playing the roles of these spectacular people and while some are very good some are just horrible and i want my story to be told before I forget, before i turn twenty and get old and fat. I dunno. It’s your choice. I don’t know if i want it to be a movie, I guess it’s pretty idealistic and obnoxious, a 19 year old saying, “I am writing a book and i want a movie and i want a tv show….” but so what. I am going to make it happen and well, encourage me or not. This is why i am here. To tell you things. I just don’t know what yet… I do need help working on my proposal letters. I don’t know how to sell myself without being all cute and annoying. Well I do but I just don’t have the focus to sit down for longer than thirty minutes and concentrate on one task.


Can I interrupt you for a moment?


Sure. I was almost finished.


I think you will go far in life or you could crash and burn however, I don’t want you to jump out of a window if nothing works out for you.


Thank you, I appreciate that. And I wouldn’t jump out a window. I don’t have the courage for that. I barely have the courage to leave my apartment. I just know that something good will happen for me one day. And i will appreciate it. Ok enough gayness now. thank you for your time. I will see you soon.


One more thing. Do your parents give you money?


No. I have been financially independent for awhile now. I don’t even have a credit card and I only first got my own checks two weeks ago. And today, I bought my first ever newspaper for myself because I figure I should start paying attention to the real news instead of people’s web-journals.
I am quite responsible, believe it or not. Ok bye.


Goodbye.





Someone is going to die. Someone is making clang clanging sounds in front of my house. Someone stole two of my ultimate favourite shirts and i only realised it today since i just hung up all my clothes. Someone honked their horn at me today over and over and it made me walk into a newspaper box. Someone stared at me on the bus and it made me nervous. Someone stole an important envelope full of money from my mailbox. Someone who works at the country style/variety store at college/dufferin is a hot asian girl who wears fancy clothes and looks like she should work for Holt Renfrew in a shopping mall. (She is not going to die). Someone told me i have nice mittens. (Also not going to die). Someone spilled hot coffee all over their left hand when they were trying to unlock the door to the apartment today. Someone’s bicycle is surely going to rot and rust away on the front porch because someone is too lazy to ride it and/or put it in the storage closet in the basement. Someone is going to die.




I think I might just be a hot GI Joe girl for Halloween so I can wear my new ultra-cool coat and boot-things and a helmet and smear black paint under my eyes and then if i cry i can look like ozzy osbourne. Hey Asshole i finally watched Dogtown z boys whatever last nite. I liked it. i want to be a surfer and a skateboard girl and have long crazy hippie hair and wear only cut-off shorts with rips in the ass-pockets and i want everyone to give me high-fives and call me ‘bro.




i wanted to share this, sticking-out-of-the-side-of-my-head piece of hair with you. Made me laugh. I think i need to wash my hair. Now.


We love the Homeless guy.