TONY PIERCE rules. sometimes i actually believe his little dialogues with celebrities. it’s true. i’m quite gullible. i am. i like how he writes about extremely personal stuff and he has all these hot girl friends. i think his ex, ashley is a bit cheesy but, whatever. she’s american. i will write more later about tony. tony tony tony. yay.
my family hates me. they think im crazy and naked and going to slit my wrists. they only look at the pictures on my website, they don’t read it. they like to get together and discuss their fears. their friends email them and say, “raymi is going to be stalked and watched and kidnapped…bla bla” and then i get neurotic phonecalls and emails from my mum and she asks me for the zillionth time when my next crazy appointment is. you know guys, if you think i’m not aware of the possibilty of someone parked outside my house in a civic 24/7, you’re pretty daft. yes i think of how you will react to every picture i post or thing i write and i just don’t care anymore. i don’t. if i walked around caring so much about what my peers thought of me, my head would cave in. i know people who make it their personal goal to constantly please their parents and meet their standards. these people are stressed out, have ulcers, are extremely insecure and are never fully satisfied with the work they are producing. now, is this a good thing?
i am not going to wear a nice conservative dress and work in an office or keep all the things i love about life a secret and i am never ever going to censor myself. i am going to say and i am going to do things that will make you so confused, but it’s ok. i do this all the time. i am “offensive” – get use to it now or just forget i exist.
your daughter has breasts and an ass and a vagina and she likes to take pictures of herself, a hobby if you will, now somewhat out of hand, but still fun and funny and there is no need to sit around debating it.
save it for oprah.
places to consider
somehow i got a hit from this shitty christian blog. that would be pretty cool if they linked me in their most evilest links page or something. and then i got a hit from this weird asian place. talk about loving thyself to the extreme. this girl is like a postcard. serious. and then i forget how i found Naked House and i don’t care. i don’t read it. i can’t seem to get past fantasizing about a naked house. and then we have photos of friends from the beginning of time. some are pretty neat. you can pretend you actually know these lame-os. and then, my personal favorite, How to make a toga dot fucking com
this knob is the knobbiest knob who ever knobbed. “Then for the head, I take a wire coat hanger and shape it into a circle that will fit my head. Then I get plastic (or real) leaves and wrap it around the wire hanger, and then put it on my head. I think it’s called a laurel, or something like that. Looks cool.” one of the girls in the picture should not have been invited to the toga party because she is not wearing a toga and please, if you will, check out the first group photo. the old hag in the front row and to the left, she, is, my, girlfriend.
i went on a shopping spree in parkdale at the dollarama with craig. i spent 8 dollars and 5 cents and i stole two beer fridge magnets and a big pack of bazooka joe gum. i bought three oversized pairs of bloomers and they look SO awesome on me. craig and i decided to take the day off and walk around. i had nitemares after watching kakashi all nite long. it was weird. might have been the pot. we ate half price fajitas last nite and i got kinda loaded and i am glad i looked pretty yesterday because i might have another job at a dirtbag bar. a FAMOUS dirtbag bar. Wheeeee! oh yeh, i also bought a pair of spectacles for a dollar. a dollar! now i will make my vision all poor.
i’m a kleptomaniac. i am. i stole this ulgy sparkly plaque thing of a fish on a fake seashell from the tanning salon and i don’t even like it. i wanted to steal the mirror but it wouldn’t fit in my bag and i’d probably make a huge hole in the drywall. i think i am going to leave a note for my upstairs neighbors and tell them they sound like elephants sometimes and i think about going up there a lot and asking them to shut up. they use our parking space and in exchange they give us 30 dollars a month and let us use their vacuum. well they will once i tell them that is what i want the deal to be. i finally had my crazy appointment today. wheeeee! and then i went to the place where everyone eats and smokes and drinks coffee and looks at themself in the mirror and this guy showed up wearing sunglasses and he was angry and he threw his sunglasses on the floor and growled and smoked and then left before his glass of water arrived. they played bad music. i think. they wrote about the art system party in eye and i was mentioned in a sneaky way. something like, …bla bla and people stripped down to their underwear bla blahhh… i have three new books to read now. one about bipolar disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder and depressive illness. i am also still reading all families are psychotic and the kurt cobain book and a few bukowski poem books. i can never focus on one thing for very long. i have the attention-span of a fruitfly. i told antidisestablishmentarian to make a page about how much in love we are. so he did. i think i will go see harry potter tonite. i have a crush on that kid. i saw him on oprah and i am like, wow. i can’t wait ’til i am a cougar. i am over-heating from the salon. guhh. i spent 120 dollars yesterday by accident. i meant to only spend 50. i bought a furry fuzzy fuckme blanket/rug-thing. ok i have to go now.
my skin is horribly pale because it was just the day after pukesville for me. they made me eat all this food and i gladly did but then woke up about 6 in the morning and had to watch a whole bunch of movies on my dad’s satellite cable box-thing to stay awake and not vomit in my hair.
Soooo, antidisestablishmentarian finally made a blog. he was embarrassed and felt like a copycat, which he should, but, meh. he literally just started it so it looks like, uhh, dull, but there is a picture of ME and this link about anti.
ok, i am very very sorry for not sharing this sooner. you see, my left-eye exploded when i watched it.
i have been very very ill. like, not being able to walk or move or be awake and not vomit every other second, ill. it really sucks. that and the fact i went to the lamest party after the supreme court of canada thing and had a truly miserable time. it felt like i was on crack. i shoulda stayed the fuck home. i have eaten all the popsicles in the world and a jillion saltines and i still feel like butt. i have to make my dad a bday card, too. i don’t have any fancy paper. ahh i’ll just do it tomorrow.
1:18pm
i feel ten times better. though, my insides feel all dried-out and empty and gurgly. i have to take a train ride to the ‘burbs to see the folks and have them all avoid touching or standing within 2 feet of me. yay.
if i have to write one more cheque, my eyes will shoot out muriatic acid!
Sunday, February 5, 1995.
I dumped Casey a long, long, long time ago! He’s such a moron, a geek, a loser, a nerd all in one. I only talked to him a couple times on the phone. I hardly knew him! But once i got to know him, I was disgusted.
Anyways: On Friday Alex’s mom picked me up, and drove me to their house. At 7:30pm we all left the house to go to Laser Quest. There was this one babe there, he was about 16 or 17. We were always shooting each other. He even called ME a CHICK! I sound sooo much like a geek! After that we went back to the house and I slept over. In the morning I went to Alex’s drama class. They’re putting on The Wizard of Oz of the 90’s. Alex is Dorothy. Oh right, my name for Laser Tag was Kurt. NIRVANA RULES!! RAP SUCKS!!!!
ps. I kinda like this guy in french immersion. Guess who.
wednesday was a total write off. so out of commission. i couldn’t say anything to anyone. stayed up all nite long pacing and lying down and pacing then finally decided i needed to get fucked up and so i did and then stayed up all nite long and then my roommate girl was in pain pain pain so we rode an ambulance to the hospital in where i sat in almost every chair and position to try and stop my head from feeling stabbing pains and girl was on a gurney bed – turns out it is gastrointestinal virus and i will probably get it because i have dumb luck and then i went home to eat chinese food and watch the cat tear the shit out of my chair and my 200 dollar jacket arrived in the mail finally. i haven’t even brushed my teeth or had a bath and i made some plans with people but i keep falling asleep and not taking a bath and now it is 1:36am and no one is around to talk to me so you can all go blow. go blow.
i saw jackass for the second time the day before yesterday. tuesday. it is still funny.
so i wanted to get myself a job last nite but i went about it in all the wrong ways. i sat at the bar and i chainsmoked and i drank double gin&tonics by myself and i scribbled in my journal and i wouldn’t tell the barpeople what about and i was neurotic and nervous and scared and i dunno if they were all fags so my sexy charms would be of no use and finally i ask is the manager in, i was drunk, surly, he said no i said, gimme my bill….then went to the pizza place late late and really wanted to steal their artwork but was talked out of it. i was. now it is not yet noon, i was up ’til 6am watching downloaded simpsons episodes and reading the kurt cobain book and i finally got a call back from the crazy people but i didn’t pick it up in time so alas, i must wait ’til 4 o’clock to say, yes yes, no no, yes, no, yes and finally get a new appointment after what’s been the longest, shittiest wait.
lookit theeeeeeeseeeee and this louisville dude will learn you all about, Louisville. go figure. and so i was thinking got mysterious stuff in his laundry. aaaand…sumo-pop just doesn’t have very many friends…
