attn: DUDES IN TORONTO!

Hi Raymi,

Hiiiiiiiii! I all of a sudden had a brain fart and was hoping you may be able to help! I’m working on a show that deals with women, body image & plastic surgery. We have an episode that is dealing with body modification – specifically tattoos. We’re looking for one guy with a tattoo (from 4-5:30pm) and two guys without (from 5:45-7:15) to spend sometime on camera with us tomorrow. We’re going to be shooting a fun social experiment that looks at men’s impression of women with and without tattoos.

email: sharpachu@gmail.com

britt claims to have intended to buy this for me, kept it for herself instead.

this is what time to go home looks like.

britt and her friend told me stories about their time in boarding school which lead to britt thinking i would have made a good boarding school kid, heh, yeah right, which lead to me telling just how i fared in “boarding school” england: ketamine, one nite stands, stealing furniture, walking into other people’s rooms during dinner to just hang, one girl stole my fake id, sneaking out at nite, coming back to sign in and take off again, hangovers, and i didn’t miss one class. anyway, memmooooooooories.

now i’m going to ADD clean the bathroom.

i almost just made myself barf while whitening my teeth, i see how long i can go with all the crap in my mouth before my gag reflex kicks in.

don’t you just love deucing so hard that it cancels out having to exercise today!

hey join this event ya dicks!

oh yeah everyone before matt good‘s show on thursday, go to the imperial pub/bar/tavern, whatever it’s called, same one as last time, upstairs, and this time TALK TO ME and/or INTRODUCE YOURSELF no wimpy staring from across the room!

this is when she started to get on my nerves and would not shut up about capturing these birds like i get it they’re flocking or whatever please stop yelling.

meet jade.

isn’t she just the cutest littlest whisperer!!!!!!!!

oh and then i backed into the dog’s water dish and soaked my sock and shoe.

and here i am talking like a peanut. (voice reserved for animals and small children)

+++

oh sass!

from the fred perry shoot, one of the pics of me in the pink dress (not shown here)(but i posted before) ok fine this pink dress:

anyway one will be in a poster that will be splashed all over toronto DON’T DEFACE IT! ha.

here are some ones of me looking like a muppet i don’t know why my face is so orange.

photos rachel drake.

there’s kinda a degrassi tint to these if that makes any sense at all.

on with it.

after blogging for other people you don’t have any steam left to be like I SAW THAT I DID THIS THESE ARE MY THOUGHTS BLAH BLAH INSERT PENIS JOKE. ungh. oh plus half my readers were too busy memorial daying off yesterday to care about my stupid blog, like, what do you do for memorial day anyway, go through all of your memorialies, hahaaha. sigh.

i said no to going to the jays game yesterday with pitt (still hung from the weekend and had work to do) and no to the bruce macdonald movie party launch whatever (free drinks, bad idea), instead i put my face into a plate of singapore vermicelli and inhaled, then we rented dan in real life which was half shitty and half endearing with more unrealistic idealistic garbage thrown in for good measure.

and now i must depart.

speaking of pitt, i have a new irish joke, he’s a member of the CIA: CATHOLIC IRISH ALCOHOLICS.

bananasbreath!

i can’t wait to get some patio furniture for the balcony and lots of flowers ones that climb and all sorts of other gay things like BLOOM and SWAY. we have a sweet balcony and we make zero use of it, this year that is all going to change.

don’t worry, i’m sick of me too.

JUST KIDDING I LOVE ME!

here is some of MY BOOK because i love you

Jan 4 2008 11.40am

it’s ok i disapprove of you way more

yesterday was BRUTAL all day long fuzzy retard headed anyway blah blah my life is a party what else is new etcetera and so on. it was fil’s high school reunion on saturday, the organizers fucked it up tho so we didn’t actually attend anything official other than a bbq where i got cut and told everyone about how i crapped my pants once.

i ended up taking a cab to the market to meet fil and hubbo with like the only change in the world i had left and walked out the door in my short shorts like so turns out the world is your biggest fan when you dress like a mental patient and by world i mean dudes. i waited forever for a cab and thought ok maybe i’ll walk so i walk a teeny bit and every wasted guy on a patio got quiet when i went by and exploded in catcall laughter once i was a metre or so away like i can still hear you geniuses. the annex is no place for my tickle trunk outfits. it’s funny when you walk by tables of dudes and there’s one girl stuck with them and they are forced to talk shit about you just to even the playing field, sad. sorry if you weren’t such a wet blanket you wouldn’t have to suffer adulation of my behind.

evidence of hangover, and i had poutine too! me!

i also ate this yesterday for breakfast


merkley‘s book came!

what a dick. no, but really, the book is amazing and inspiring. here‘s the skinny on how you can get yourself one of these collector’s items.

i’m sad about the busted ipod, it still works, it just won’t scroll, and it’s integral to my work outs, you see i ride this shitty exercise bike for 20 minutes and i time it on the ipod by changing songs for the duration of the 20 minutes (wicked ADD bad and biking is boring as hell) and then i get off and do the row machine, anywho, how do i know when 20 minutes is up w/o an ipod how do i exercise and force myself to enjoy it without music to flail my arms to? can they fix ipods at the apple store?

this is the exact same car our friend had as a kid, his parents sold it, then he made lots of moohla, found it and bought it back.

alright more later.

this post is brought to you by i am better than you.

ps. don’t snort adderall.

fil got an american apparel hoodie yesterday, i forced him to, of course we went to winners first and of course he didn’t find one there (NEVER DOES AND NEVER LISTENS TO ME) and i suffer for his not having the proper hoodie/cardi to go with whatever t-shirt he is wearing when we are last minuting our party outfits ungh anyway, i’m sitting here in a towel trying to visit the entire internet cos i do not want to have to carry this hoodie to fil fifty million blocks away so if you have anything you want me to do now’s the time to ask.