No-kay?

Ready for more emo Europe? Well good then because that is what you are getting much to the chagrin of other shit I have to do and well, sleep. I just gotta do it. When you are a crazy writer and you don’t pleasure write, your words become poison inside of you and guess what the only release is? Pleasure writing. Like how I once said the antidote to men, is more men. Like a coin with two heads.

Licorice brains. I wanted to buy this for the office but it was so heavy.

Although in hindsight it’s so much more hilarious and possibly appreciated. My dutch clogs are sprinkled throughout the office, dutch clogs and mini porcelain pill jars (vitamins, tylenol). It’s like my tradition now to go to this one store and buy a pile of crap because I like lighting money on fire.

It’s pure junk through and through though, pure junk squared.

Goodbye my friend. Impatient bf was like come on wtf hurry. Um, it’s just, oh I don’t know.. beautiful! No you wtf! I feel like my life is a non-stop dialogue cross between New girl and 2 broke girls. Oh, also, that show Girls too. AND LAST NIGHT, NEW GIRL QUEEN BEE Zooey Deschanel RETWEETED MEEEEE BTW!

Don’t worry, I know what my follow-up is gonna be. With a 35% chance of tankage.

Last night, or one of them. Three last nights count as your last night. Compliments of the house. Everyone when I instagrammed this photo was like OMG WHAT IS THAT “Yum” and OMG TELL MEEEEE NOW! Uh, relax bro it’s just mustard.

He made me bartend for him/us for a laugh cos I was requesting music so much, backfired though cos I sucked and had no idea how to respond to Dutch directions plus was drunk. He was going to the Caribbean in a few days so had island don’t give a sh– brains plus is awesome in general. Students came in for RUSH or whatever and their leaders told him to make them do bar work and he made them clean LOL. It’s one of my favourite bars and we’ve only been a few times but he remembers me and knows my bf/our friends/and sister too + he squeezes my arm while laughing exceptionally loud and crazy after making whatever joke he just made about me/us/it/that and everyone else immediately laughs too. Meanwhile, all these crazy things are happening around us at the time PLUS you can get free postcards there. And well look at him. Awesome.

Ehhhh. I instagrammed this and it is just as bad there. I LOVE THESE PEOPLE.

OH BEHAVE LAST DAY EMO. Oops caps. It still stands though.

We went to Germany on a Sunday (I believe) as one of our last milestones to do, to a restaurant we’ve been to many times but never before at night. It felt more magical that way.

I am the only English speaking person for every 5,000 so that lends a bit of intensity to the experience too.

Germany is cheaper than Holland to eat. However, your dollar does no go as far there.

Have a sweet night or something like that, can a German person translate thank you.

Bread for my ducks which we ate later on at home instead

I love everything about this place. In the summer time we rented a paddleboat out back. We became one with our duck and water fowl friends, it got intense!! I had to use my flip flop for protection and we were both in bathing suits.

I’d say this would be The Drake if they had a summer time Muskoka place Except this is in the middle of nowhere in Germany, a hotel resto with a lake and palm trees. A fireplace indoors and so much seating space, heat lamps and a dining are down below. I should be writing restaurant copy.

Huge bowl of bread you didn’t order, perfect for olive oil dipping at home. You order a salad cos you want to eat light then they bring you a bakery. We also eat it with salami later on.

I love baked things but they take ten yeas to cool down. You always burn your lips and/or insides of your mouth though.

This is what I like to call it’s a hotel thing. Decor is infinite.

Omg I spilled the beans. Oops. Psh. (it works though).

This drink was fabulous though.

Darling croquettes. Brought with mayonaise in teeny ice cream cones. WHATTTTT?

Unnnnnngh.

Carpaccio.

Dreamy.

Oliver Twist was here.

It looks like a cruise ship.

Aaaaaaaand cut to Amsterdam. Weirdest upload ever, scattered, why I’ve avoided doing this.

Good times though. This fudge I bought was so weak, stale. I got Scamsterdammed.

By a palace of some sort.

Xmas lights. sigh

Honk honk ooh sassy.

I have a sinking feeling.

This store was out of control.

And yo were not allowed to take pictures. I did anyway.

Remember.

These stalls to my right are special Christmas things. Charming. Fun.

My first xmas abroad.

Epic wine boxes.

Yikes and goodnight LOL. This is my Hunter S Thompson-ing.

Ski chalet beer garden ftw.

UFO heat lamp.

To be continued. ps. no-kay is a word I invented bye.

(I’ll edit this tomorrow).

Last night a blogger saved my life

HI! God. I have missed blogging but I just couldn’t. I had to write an overdue thing (I have still 2 more other things to do but am taking tonight for myself to blog that’s that) and had been putting it off for various (and real) reasons and so if I blogged I’d be feel sheepish. Which sucks a little because I have found that blogging actually helps me do the things that I need to do because I get it out of the way, the nagging guilt bubble pops and then I can do the legit shit. Sigh anyway, here I am now and enough of the explanations.

I also had to go through these winners and try to figure out where I left off. I know I put some on my tumblr, I almost just blogged a bunch I already did weeks ago. God can you imagine that, two posts with identical pictures but wildly different captions and rambling stories? I bet you actually can imagine that.

This feels like a lifetime ago. It was I guess. There’s so much immediacy in the world and now now now news online that we don’t really talk about things that happened last week and no one cares at all after a month.

My hair seems so much shorter too. I don’t know if I posted this and it’s not even exciting, it’s just a, moment in time kinda thing.

We are on the way to Germany and this is going backward in time, it was my last day and it had that last day vibe all over it.

It didn’t snow once while I was there and it barely snowed in The Netherlands at all this winter, only in certain areas and only a teeny bit. Breaking weather records this winter, the mildest in centuries or decades.

Ah you can see a windmill in the mirror. I am so sick of winter and my dry hands, my lips are always dry – so dry it started bleeding at the mall the other day wtf thanks.

Car rides when you have a camera you just snap away.

Hmm. This was my last day, the Germany thing was my last-last day I dunno but this was my last day for real. Who cares ya ya but this was the last meal. I’m gonna make that its own post because I don’t want it lumped together with my boring car photos that I somehow stretched into 4 separate posts.

This is me right now btw see how quick my hair grows now that it’s not platinum?

Me today also. That shirt I bought is a bit (way) too big I felt like I was in a night gown. BRB with more!

Mo euro mo problems

Hi pals. Your favourite weirdo is here again, continuing onward with my pics from abroad. Here we are in Germany. These gloves are a little MJ no?

Long distance relationships are intense. A lot depends on them. Though it somewhat feels like depending on a ghost, you don’t quite believe it yourself. When they randomly say certain things that help solidify your vision of the future you’re like, oh really? Really. It’s nice to have a backbone. I mean, it could be just so easy to be alone and “wait” or, I don’t know. It’s just really great to have love period. It is also whimsical to be with your love in Europe. Everything is heightened. Demanding. There’s no bullshitting. In the dating world, there is a lot of bullshitting. When you’re on the other side of the fence of that, it is appreciated.

I felt like a different person in Europe too. Like I looked different? I didn’t care, but cared in a different way. One thing I think is, if we are going to stay together and marry, have kids, how are we going to do that with me working here and him there? It’s a thing I don’t obsess over but am for sure aware of. Women have windows. TMI whatevs, assume half the people who visit here just skim anyway.

Okay I’ll stop headcasing now. Lets check out my experiences!

Lots of horses and cows, sheep, etc are seen in the area of Holland and Germany where we reside and eventually becomes a so what thing. But here, no, you do not see a gorgeous show pony every other property you pass by. I told people at work I milked cows, they believed it lol.

Happily, he captures the idiot moments too where I demand a photo opp but don’t know how to rock it yet.

Each town/desty you go to is like this. Magnificent. Not in your face, but, kind of. We’d have like one of them back home (The Distillery). Do not take the Euro design, oldness, zoning, anything for granted because once you go home it’s so different. You will develop a keen eye when watching movies placed in Europe and kind of weep.

What is this? I don’t know but take my picture in front of it.

The smell of his pipe stunk up the entire section of this euro labyrinth of shoppes so much so I took a sneaker picture. Then we smelled him half hour later somewhere else. SO obnoxious. Don’t get me started on cigars or pipes.

That’s my monkey.

That’s, German merchandising store-fronting.

And shoes. Do these look particularly Euro to you, or whatever? Can’t tell after some time.

He tried to get us to have a snack and I declined because I wanted “real” dinner but, we should have in hindsight because we wandered around and around for awhile, lost, trying to find the best place. Fungry.

Guess what COORS!!!

Well, if you’re gonna buy diamonds…

Being in Germany, two days before you are leaving, as the sun sets… feelings.. This picture is my desktop bg now. Okay that’s all for now I’m toasted. I wrote this last night. Bye now.

ps. check out Playboy Energy V-Spot if you’re jonesing for more Raymbo.

Raymi abroad continued

Continuing now with my nonsense of things from abroad, here is my last Friday night in Holland. They had that edible paper pasted to our bread and I’m covering the name because I am private like that. Anyway I tasted it and it was like very fine barely even paper bland/remniscent of the bread flavour in taste. That sentence fuckin sucked, sorry.

I love this place for various reasons, multiple sentimental levels that if I typed them out you’d just big fat “oh so what” yawn at me for it. It’s a shower then it’s a grower but it still agitates you a bit because after final dinner service it turns into a night club, the energy is palpable to you as you dine and especially on a Friday night. It’s an influential vibe as in, you drink.

Then another night he had a croquette and beer craving, one of those days you just eat nothing satisfying I suppose so we went out late to this one somewhat local place, we threw maybe ten euros in coins into this and lost it all pretty fast but the best part was watching two dudes come in and play a machine each and you could tell they were on a tear, a full Euro tear. People watching in Europe is 1000% more interesting especially if you know what country they come from because they are so much closer to it, and all those things you’ve heard about this such and such a person or that becomes live before your very eyes. I can’t describe it, I won’t. It’s just good.

Same place. We came here one of my first nights too. They only let us leave with our tall boys instead of serve us beer there. Funny laws in Europe and loop holes everywhere. This night however we made it in time and it was packed with truck drivers, lots of Polish ones and other east Euro kinds. It’s infuriating not being able to understand anybody because my boyfriend erupts in laughter every other minute and I’m like WHAT?? WHAT!? And he has to continue listening because it’s so good whatever they’re saying and by the time they’re done we have to whisper talk because they notice we’re watching, and the moment is over.

This was my last Thursday. We visited our favourite park, the one with the trees and flowers and the necklace and our only other social life, the ducks we fed since they were ducklings.

Everything we did this week was tainted with emo because I was leaving soon. No snow though bro.

bf asked if my outfit was a Canadian flag ahhaha.

A girl at work was wearing similar Pumas to these today except with extra embellishments and flare. I pointed them out and commented. I left behind ALL of my shoes from spring. It feels like being a divorced kid.

Then when something cute happens or we laugh we’re like aw ahahahh then sad because wah going to miss that. He pretended he was filming me so I was all berserk wtf.

5 papes left warning/calling card.

Me in Germany with my friend.

Now we are in Germany on my last Tuesday. I only know this from hanging up a calendar and Flickr tells me the date the photo was taken (the 14th), quite handy that. I flew the sixteenth so depression was at an all time high.

Peach/pink gorgeous place is where that yuppie told us to eat.

Considered the Ratskeller lol.

Looking over the menu, smoking.

La vie. Agree.

Vunderbar

He’s emo, I relate.

Attention span over plus Dateline is on PEACE!!!!

this speaks to my heart

My static blog was keeeeeling me. Plus, I have a couple things to do that I “can’t” from winding down after work so one hand blames the other. I feel like if I personal blog, me-blog, like “I’m in trubs” because I did something but not the priority things. But maybe I need to personal blog to open up the creative flood gates and make way for the to do. Which I can’t quit whining about. I think after jet lag then confronting post vacay blues, emo acceptance and thrust into moving stress as well as back to work getting into the groove of (which am happy to report: all is good there) I needed to just, do those things. Period.

I uploaded 500 photos from abroad like a mad man and it’s starting to give me Obsessive Compulsive Disorder anxiety and worry “I will forget” #neverforget.

So here are photos from my last night, in Germany, the night before I left. My last supper. At a Deutschland potato place. Don’t get me started on the food. It’s really good, I will just leave it at that. BORINGLY that. Hee.

Imagine Yogurt with a J. It is real. Jogurt. It’s cute.

Hispanic prawn what? This is english provided menu, thank god. Reading German is like reading a made-up cartoon language on the care bears. I dunno. I know that’s really ignorant, but words are just SO LONG.

I had Fanta vodka. YOLO

Those are good signs for British people.

You’re kidding me. Love it.

The tables were covered in papers, so many menus, we were sitting in wooden church pew-like booths and everything had that old classic look and feel to it. Authentasia.

The outside. We ran around lost for a long time getting colder and colder and finally I made us ask someone and then we found this place. It’s like finding a giganticer Yorkville, Distillery, Old Mtl, etc. BUT real deal Germania.

And you don’t understand a thing.

A yuppie told us to go here. His kinda place. Okaaay. linen service place. I guess it’s a compliment. It had more of a work drinks vibe to it.

Cuckoo clock shit like this everywhere. My favourite.

A lone man smoking here, I doubled back and took a photo of the lemons, the moment.

That’s the man there. Each tiny place was cookie cutter Paddington bear set in nature.

Like seriously.

Took quite a bit to settle/decide on where to eat. This was a cafe that boasted, like, Timothys, but was really a restaurant, a proper one. I’m not a picky eater anymore, just selector. Because I hate being settled then realizing you’re in a hole or their menu is ridiculous. Food snob all the way forever more and nothing but. Deal with it.

Forgot to bring smokes, bf had to buy some here. They have cigarette machines everywhere here in abundance like the 70’s. 80’s. Super time warp.

Sure. A spot light behind a terra cotta Jesus’ biblical times water vase, cliche whatever have fun.

Okay that is good. It’s so nice there.

Lots of Gothic black roofs. It’s their thing. You can tell by the stripe in their flag.

Moving over to Holland, I discovered this particular favoured way of marketing this particular feature film. #interesting. and #goodluckwiththat does it work?

Speaking of Germany, had just gotten back from there this evening.

I left this coat for sister. She doesn’t know that yet.

What I had for Linner in Germany. I thought I ordered something more mexican but received gyro Greek. Okay then. I still love this place.

Huge burgers if Big Macs were flat and round like massive saucers.

Catching up on my local fashion cultures.

This was before NYE, we were like hmm what to do/want to do that but we are old. Still it was fun and exciting. I’m a big fan of “before” anticipation. I’m sure you love a pre-game too.

Classic retro repro posters hang everywhere, mirrors so you can spy on everything and person. We came in during a Vanilla sky sunset. Can’t forget the magic of Christmas ornaments donning everything everywhere.

That’s a festival bracelet. Tiny bolts are on the other side, stacked.

He explained this one to me but I forget. Go for it.

Dick Tracy lights.

Sith Lord what.

Jesus. Ballin’. I always do a good 2 avocados a week from the couch. Rock salt and lime guy.

My last Friday in Holland, went for a Fridate bender and that’s my beloved tree in the back yard and it was misting. Then my hat fell in a puddle. Hehaha.

:(

Baha don’t ask. Bottom left is what gingerale looks like over there and it’s hard to find but has since been easier or they order more at our grocery store finally.

This is back in Holland now.

Yep I look stupid it is not just your imagination but maybe no game is my game.

I love this part of Holland.

I am tired now/need to move along. To be continued. Oh, I’m up for a travel category blog award now as well as life time achievement and life. ZZzz bye!

not everything but a lot of things

Here’s a post I began, don’t know when, but abandoned sure enough off to somewhere with no time to spare. I’m back now in Canada and completely brain fried. Yay. I know that I hated my prawn pasta dinner but was too much of a priss to send back so I soldiered through. This was my last Friday in Holland. Sigh. Guess I’m still a delicate infant in denial. Glad to be back at work to occupy me of course, and be social. I go back Monday.

More soon!

OH NO FOMO

Here’s my afternoon backwards in Osnabruk, Germany. Just some highlights cos we’re on the way out again to see sis and our buddy.

Now not to be a dick here but, if a Canadian chef went to Germany to do their thing they would kill it on account of the zero competition. I’ll throw a “just saying” on that for good measure. I’m just talking about the salads, I dunno, it is all classic style generally for the most part.

Well there’s a painting.

Deer head in a tree FTW.

TURN OFF DAS LICHT!

I watched the book thief last night, which is also set in an old charming German town.

These “Usies” were dimly backlit so by this point I was making face like that.

This is the town he came to buy his first ipad ever. It was cheaper in Germany.

This weirdo building sticks up all adorable like that godddd.

Their walking man is the best too.

Woah.

Scarf from mom I have no idea how to wear at this point in time.

My hair day ruled though and you can see the platinum tips. Time to dye.

Gotta go round two begins.

Hollandaise Holidaze

Hi Christmas bros! Now, before fake-apologizing for my absence lets just get to it kay? Above is my tree. There is something satisfying about picking out a live tree, buying lights for it. Dressing it. Zzzzz. Blah blah, I made that shit son!

I love this scarf. Mostly in part because I selected it myself and have already mentally envisioned said self wearing it in various states of hanging out/working. Pumped.

Went for a Christmas walk today. I turned it kinda into aerobics, here I am side stepping – jumping rather. IIIIINTENSE. I also ran too. We ate early because sister had to work so my stuff was all said and done before you guys even woke up.

Watch out. Be careful. Thank you for your visit. Except w/o grammar.

Typical Dutch home, usually on a lot of land. Farms. Stereotypical awesomeness.

Look at the no snow. Also, it’s very mild. We had a crazy windstorm a couple days in a row and yesterday it rained uber gloomily yet you had spirit aboutcha from the xmas eve vibe. We had a fun day. Saw a movie with sis and her friend AND they sell beer there AND you get a pee break “pause” mid-flick, but mostly it’s for smokers which is also awesome. It makes movie night more social, less boring. Plus the movie concessions are bizarro world selections and you can get funnel cake-like deep-fried balls called: oliebol, half the posters are in Dutch. I mean all of them. But the movies are the same as back home. But with Dutch subtitles at the bottom. Everything is basically a trip. It’s all the same but different and you are constantly wondering if everyone is lookin at you because you look different or is it because you look the same but awesome?? Head buster.

Pauze is like break assumedly. I understand 15% of what people are saying and zone out the rest so it’s a massive mental holiday too for real. Starting to accrue funny verbal interactions with strangers moments as well note to self. Some assume I am American and yes, I do get attitude.

I got spoiled.

Scarf heaven. I look tired. We stay up late watching telly. We haven’t seen each other in 2 months, about. Plus it’s holidays why the fuh am I going to bed early for?

At his parent’s place. The girls were out smoking when we drove up they were dressed all nice it was a cute moment. I then connected to how mild it was here than in Canada as I saw them out on this balmy bench – they removed the plants to sit. I wouldn’t have thought of that.

The days are shorter because The Netherlands are more north. Less daylight and so daylight, is valued.

At sister’s last night before the movie, her and mom said I’m thinner. I’ve gained a kilo+ (3-5lbs?) since being here omg there is just so much to enjoy. YOLO.

Bike material for daaaaaaaaaaaays. All the pics will be slightly better too, this camera is ballin’ I almost forgot.

Then there are the food differences and just blowing tons of money at the supermarket, cheese is amazing, so is chocolate. Meat. Snacks. I am going to miss the light OJ, the getting booze from within the supermarket, these stick chips. SIGH.

Fashion is hot too. I will definitely be treating myself to some of that before I leave and I finally have the time to just do it period. I will also be most definitely paying extra for luggage weight on the way back. Early January are the sales too. I think that one’s pretty international though.

EYEROLL.

Oh here’s why people were staring, I looked like Peter Pan: Christmas Jiminiy Cricket edition. I was close to getting a pair of boots but patience was at an all time low. Ankle boots are in, I wanted a low heel pair but they had to be the best pair of the 200 or so varieties AND at best value (deep inner-seeded cheapstake syndrome) but bf left store and I was like “this shopping is about US!” Bahahahah. Then I started crying and we were like ok F-T, shopping is officially over. I know I’ll go get them once they’re all on super sale in January. I was angry because he made me suffer ADD-HELL boredom while he looked for a coat and fair is fair, you have to help me pick out boots and make this chore easier. You’d think shopping would be enjoyable. Nope!

Seeing everyone on these, and bikes, is really inspirational. Kids, young girls with long hair in braids just like tooling around it’s another life. You can ride town to town on the bike paths along the roadway, or all the way to Amsterdam and not have to be anxious about highway bullshit.

Bike dramas everywhere. Hey man he fell. The wind knocked over tons of bikes. The forest today had a lot of fallen over trees. We are storm junkies.

You’re welcome!

The difference is there’s relish in it. I relish the thought. I heard they were going to discontinue making relish because nobody likes it. Where did I hear that? Lol either way.

Haha aw. Our necklace is talking.

I got this half. I suppressed screaming out something like I’VE ALWAYS WANTED A SISTER. Like, the forever side could be anything she could just lie like she doesn’t mean it (haha hyper-insecurity sets in).

Why are you wearing red though? Red is my thing. Red is the jam on my bread. (it’s okay I am just joking we can share). It’s funny though we always show up kind of matching. #getoutofmyhead.

German steakhouse time. All of these have been backward by the way. I’ll turn the rest around now so the meal portion of the post makes sense.

Wearing my new Ralph Lauren sweater for the first time. I had a red one similar to it, maybe it was Tommy? Either way, I tend to have a red sweater at all times if I can manage it. Wow, this drivel is tops eh, are you on auto-pilot right now? hello tap tap.

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