This is a two piece I got at Adventurehouse garage sale off Melodie, it’s a bit big but I kinda like that. I love playing dress-up.
Mad mama!
It’s quarter passed five do you know where your husband is?
I am swimming in this, gonna get it taken in to major slutville tiny town usa.
Christmas work party disaster in the making wheee!
When I ask for a cigarette that’s when it’s curtains.
Just kidding, cigarettes are disgusting.
Nail polish change night!
Running for congress.
References available upon request. Any idiot who puts that on a resume is an, idiot. Make that shit up! Mr. Majors Manager of Bullcrap Industries, employed by for 7 years sure call his ass up no problem!
Do you like peppermints, dear? Why don’t you suck on one while you wait in the lounge, sir.
Heeheh. I am ready Donal Trump.
Oh kitty.
Do you guys think oysters actually make you horny or is that a placebo effect? I have some important foodie interview questions to answer bye now. OOH guess who got VIPLEASE to Ghostface at Sound Acadmey HOLLA!! Hot mess OUTTIE. I hope Courtney looks good I am tired of being the hottest one all the time.
If you’re gonna eat like a pig, then you should dance like one. Dancing in these heels is ridiculous. I will master thee. Looks like it’s time to schedule a hair appointment. Just came back from a nice run with the dog to clear my head, my winter workoutfit was dope, guy. It’s all about the leather and wool mitts. I do not expect you to watch all of this video but you could learn a thing or two about shaking your ass a bit. Try it on, looks good! This was a great work out, all soca music is, dutty beats make you get down low and keep ya limber. My legs were numb jelly afterward. time for triceps and hip hop!
Ever glad that wind machine trick worked, Raymio. (Fabio duh).
Ha cheesy.
This smell is so nostalgic to me, cranberry and pomegranate. Powerful and I think I said reminiscent and Teacher goes, get it, scent? YES THANK YOU!
Just unearthed a trove of iphone pictures. Oh boy.
Wasn’t SNL so good? And Florence! What were the two songs she did? I want to youtube abuse them.
Seriously I feel like Angelica Houston in Life aquatic with all these animals that all visit one by one and gather around it’s like Snow White meets Harold & Kumar. Lol.
This is pretend posing obvi. You run out of ideas eventually when you are an old geezer dead horse beating blogger like me, you get better at it, true, but come Sunday you just want to hang in your underwear.
Just wait until this room gets attacked by Christmas.
Wizard!
Raymi the Real doll coming soon. How much money do you think they would pay for me? He said a grand, if it were a Raymi fan. Interesting. Lord knows there are chicks who give it up for free and regularly. It would be more like five grand I’d say. We have interesting conversations around here lemme tell ya.
We watched a lot of telly this weekend.
Welp, at least my hair is perfect. The trick is to not wash it for three days, on day three, wash it and ta da. The natural hair oil (grease) relaxes it and your hair is like hey! I’m relaxed! Then you act conceited all day long and the scary mess monster what was before is long gone.
But a NEW scary monster appears in her stead, bossy hot monster! You cannot escape.
I am drunkish here. It was awesome. Had a can of clamato and vodka at home and just took the rest to go. I was good this weekend we had marathon movie couch surfing to make me look younger and fresh for tomorrow.
This is a Raymeh room for sure there is so much going on.
He said I have to clean up the mantle for Christmas time, well not really cos all my stuff is sparkly and decorated already and I am planning on a Hello Kitty explosion. Sigh fine just kidding! I’m a girl version of a Ryan Reynolds’ Freaky Friday film rip-off dramedy how his loft aesthetics might be, big kitschy junk and juvenile garbage littered everywhere. SORRY I’LL CHANGE! (pfft right).
The more people try and mindfuck me to change, the more I stay the same, and play better.
Long winter. Boo :(.
I can’t tell if I am in shape or not anymore. I’m not heavier so, ugh. I am too lazy to run I have to get back in to that habit. I just HATE the cold.
I have problems going cross-eyed, I have to hold my finger between my nose, they just want to see straight.
Nice and thick. Made the right choice. He tried to go toward grey, cheaper, no no no. This will match all the stupid white things in the room.
And better for pictures.
The other rug is going upstairs on the landing whenever that gets cleaned. #never
SCARY BABYSITTER legs. That’s my sequel to Bad Teacher.
She gets paid extra after midnight… I can’t write something vulgar enough right now I am too much in la la land.
Almost got a big mirror for behind the couch and will but need to know how to mount/anchor without it coming down on our heads. I think a mirror belongs over the fireplace though this post is so yuppie puke barf sorry.
See the difference in our phone camera qualities? Different shades of garbage.
This had better not be rug foreshadowing.
So far so good.
No seriously, I was listening. What?
Ikea scales are skinny scales.
Shelf for the little bathroom. Above toilet.
Great view, lovely dinner. Suburban and high-end common but whatever. They had boozy bellinis.
It is beautiful in there and I loved the green grass by the kitchen. I love going out to Sunday dinner.
He had rib-eye.
My view, I swapped so he could take it in plus that cute italian family left so I ran out of people to stare at. There were a lot of babies though and young dads. Teacher wants a baby now. Sorry not now!
EMO!
How many songs are written about you? I have four to my knowledge. I also have to review that book with the story written by a twelve year old Raymi, Laura coincidentally emailed me today. I need more manpower! Yes that is sexist I like it.
I would make a good sorceress or some cosplay dorky zelda type thing. IDEA!
I love Kiki Dunst.
Schwartzmen is hilar in this.
Party on, Wayne. Ok guys this has been great but I have work to do meow. Have a nice day!
Good day sorry I’m late. Had to clean up the gingerbread cave. We managed to use every single cup on hand and thus two loads of dishwashing in queue that I cannot sit down and work with a clear mind by if it doesn’t look at least a little tidy. Cluttered space, cluttered mind.
The new rug is sumptuous and lovely and everybody is happy about it I want more pillows now and the first person to spill on it gets their throat slit. I’m one to talk though, spilled red wine on my white jacket last night, it came out but what a scene. My glass tripped on the creased table cloth and launched it everywhere.
This book is a relic.
Downloading more of yesterday’s/this weekend’s modest damage and I’ll be back with…MORE!
Taking it easy today cos tomorrow I have an important audition. Nuthin’ to sell here, just bloggin’ to blog. How was your weekend?
The gravy wall was mesmerizing, I must say. Bernaise sauce!
Pizzaless pizzas and green bean poutine. Knowing me is like knowing PeeWee Herman. You’re welcome.
There’s something sexy about this shitty cell phonograph of me. Just can’t put my finger on it.
But anyway, here is one of (several) of my popular twitter retweeted quotes, lets live by it today:
OWN THY SHIT! Whatever that may be, own it. You are you so you be the best you and don’t worry about anybody else.
Mondays are delicious (because it’s my first time alone after the weekend and it makes me excitable to be a loner?) Speaking of delicious…
Code name: Raymbo (like rambo) and just as mullet-like
Secret weapon: A toothy fake smile
Fav bite: Jerk
Hates: Meatloaf
Takin’ pictures of the future dishes I’ll be crafting. I find if I am in a mellow enjoyable mood, I spend way more money at the grocery store. It’s ok though as it’s cost-efficient over going out. I make up for it in caviar.
I look like a slob break and enterer. Hipster boy bait.
Teacher pushed me on the cart in front of all these perfectionist yuppies near the deli, we quickly aborted that stunt. Hahha.
In the industry this is known as “set dec”. Britt taught me that.
Frech Baci chocolates. O_O YUM!
The missing Baci spot is the one I took! The guy making these flew in direct from Italy.
Green bean poutine. The gravy wall was amazing.
Top ten videos of hotness and bringing it inspiration according to RTM.
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Here is an example of an email type message that I get daily here at raymi the Minx enterprises. A lot of people write to me or leave me death threats and sexually abusive comments regarding a video I danced to years ago and don’t seem to understand that youtube was merely just the vehicle in which I utilized for my dancey videos for my blog, which is my primary source of care, focus, and attention on the internet. I do not dwell on youtbe but for some reason this video, and I have many, gets the most cray cray and I think it’s because it’s in the Silence of the Lambs movie as those are the majority of quotes referenced in the comments, a lot of people make fun of me and say I am a transgender, whatever, THEY are the sexually-confused people. ANyway, here’s the comment:
I noticed that ya dyed your hair, ya know, “blonds have more fun” but, traditionally, dark haired women currently and throughout history have been the most attractive, ironically, the vast majority of “First Ladies of the White House” have had dark hair, and, Cleopatra, Princess Stephanie of Monaco, Princess Catherine of Wales, goddess “Aphrodite” all have dark hair, dont get me wrong, I think your hot either way, unquestionably a very very attractive women, not as sexy as me but, very attractive.
393 LIKES and 286 dislikes. Over 141,000 views. When you have been case studying people on the internet for over a decade and are kind of brilliant like me, you stumble on to patterns of habit with people, I find that this comment is true and pure and honest cos this person’s perspective on me is youtube channel driven, and my blog is secondary. Some people find this video of me and fall in love or are majorly repulsed. This video engenders a strong reaction because (I think) they’re already sensitive and freaky cos they’re youtubing Goodbye Horses cross-dressing theme song, which I didn’t know at the time. I heard it the night before at our friend’s house, loved the song while we were playing grand theft auto as it was on the video game and made a dance video to it. Similarly, there’s another song that I love to rap and dance to by L’il Kim and I am smart enough to know this time around that it would be “too much” to blog video dance, but I can perform it in a club, dance video it and I dunno, another Goodbye Horses happening?
Brb with more garbage as usual.
Icing failure. I TRIED to get more gingerbread houses but it felt excessive despite knowing there wouldn’t be icing in these Swedish minimalist kits. We have another one. I must say though, pairing high-end gingerbread (Ikea is good quality over grocery store junk) with ginger beer was genius of me. Did you enjoy this gingerbread warning anecdote?
I better win that trip. I never win anything though so whatever.
Exercise grease monster weekend.
Ok so apparently I am being too Nicolas Cage in Family Man right now this weekend so I am wrapping this up now BYE! Ps. I made a lot of funny comments on twitter last just saying if you needed some more Raymeh.
Just kidding it’s just an horderve. I stopped myself at the spanakopita rolls. We can get Agabi again like last weekend and then for everyone’s after dinner enjoyment I’ll slip into a food coma. Psyched!
This picture makes me want to watch Santa Claus I want to live at the North Pole. I am so goony for Christmas this year!
This was my date machine dress. Teacher loves me in it. I kept the date machine detail out when he had stars in his eyes while staring at me hehheh. Melodie made up a song about me in her new band called Date Machine. For pretend. I find that just making a joke rather than following through is a lot more fun and less work. You can read more about my lazy/productive work ethics in my guide to life. Coming out in 2019.
I need new and more shirts. Fashion labels hook it up I want to be a model for threadless or some shit.
Ha creepy cray cray. We were a scene. Always are.
Which nail polish hmmm. This clock stresses me out when I’m working on deadline it’s like time goes faster the bigger it is! I am still drinking coffee with a straw.
I like the design here. Tiny space and made it shine.
I want my own little dog.
Fucking with Bean while Renita does some tattoo finishing touches.
I was sure to hang up my wool vest cos last time Ren did my tattoo (it’s in my archives you can go see) her dog ate up my hat.
Exactly.
Adorable shoes.
Has two black cats too, like the Matrix albino twin dorks and their dreadlocks. Barf.
Teacher has a student at school who is in love with him. She has asked about his eyes as her latest crush question of the day this past week and the other kids teased her when she asked in class what kind of car he drove, “stuuuuuh-alker!” HAHAHHA. Then a few Fridays ago when I was too hungover to meet them at St. Lawrence market on a field trip (so was Teacher ok but he HAD to go, whereas I didn’t and that’s the beauty of blogging) the following Monday they were asking if he was heartbroken and crying over my not joining them (kids, we live together we get our fill, trust me) and little miss crush goes, “I would’ve come.” (oh no you didn’t!) when he defended me by illustrating the choice between couch and warm comfort over freezing cold across town and 30 teenagers. I really wanted to go and get drunk off all that adolescent attention but in the end blogging in my little bubble won out but now naturally I am obsessed with hearing about this girl and when I get a moment I’ll find her on Facebook. Ooh exciting I can’t wait for prom, Teacher better play his cards right and get on committee or whatever happens on tv, except in real life.
AW I want a gremlin for a dog too! She also looks like a gargoyle.
The skinny ankles society got together last night and talked business strategy.
Coining a new term, called, ahem, the one-hander. LOL. It’s our goal.
Reason for existence. We strive for excellence. Perfection.
You know this is a load of bullshit right? Ok good lets go back to pretending now.
No really it’s a great club. Courtney mentioned that there was another new member I apparently wanted to induct but I can’t remember and Courtney’s scattered description is hazy.
Finally left with her parklife music video london flats painting I made that always makes Al break into a long story about his childhood.
Later on they’re posting some more cute things from Raymeh too! GICU is featured on Street Boners and TV Carnage so it’s like Hipster-oriented. My particular brand of hotness, I’d say, has a punk flare. Love ya bye! Oh, later on means right meow! Time for a frosty beer thanks GICU TGIF!
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I made Negronis.
Kahlua chocolate carnage. Xmas time at the shops is deadly.
