Not saying that I’m a ninja but I WILL scale a wall.

To be continued. Gotta go xo.

Hi!

So, granted, yesterday I threw a gossip grenade into my blog, created a “crisis” drama and boom goes the dynamite it worked. I’ll be sure to mention yesterday next month at my social media talk. So many old fans and friends came out of the woodwork, it was pretty great. One guy was like part of me hopes you are just trolling us that is genius! Should have thought of that years ago! Remind me to do a seminar on trolling. Thank$.

Here is one of my notes on YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA GAME I may as well do a note to self right here right meow I don’t see why not? I want to write it down before I lose it, then we can get back to talking about yesterday.

So, you see how I partake in a lot of tomfoolery, “different” avenues, show a little skin, say wild and grandiose things (it’s in my nature, sorry about that), go bowling, talk in length about food and my body and weight issues, drinking, drying up etc.. and lets see now if you are trying to get your own social media game on.

Now, would it be silly if as a real estate agent, for example, with a twitter account (tied to your blog) if you tweeted about an improv group you joined pehaps, or showed your clipper ship set progress and maybe shared your political views which your territory might all be in favour of… no, not all fun and games gets us paid or laid BUT it actually can.

Showing that other dimension to your character, your persona, as a needle in a stack of real estate agent needles is KEY in getting ahead. P-e-r-s-o-n-a-l-i-t-y dudes. Stand out in the crowd. Look good. Don’t like it? Then why are you in the business of selling houses, all elements require good looks in taste, aesthetics, and appeal. Aside from image, we want personality.

Yesterday I went for a screen test, and it was my personality that won them over above all else. Secondary to that, my looks. As in my body. They loved my personality so much they want more of it. “You’re attractive and engaging and I knew that after meeting you for only a few minutes. You have the same presence on camera, as is indicated in your screen test. This is a huge plus and a real draw for us.”

When America’s Next Top Model had the season where they wanted to get America’s Next Top Branded Model, they wanted it all. They wanted all the work done for them and that is what social media game is. Just because my numbers aren’t sky high doesn’t mean I am a failure. half my audience silently lurks me and always will. And soon I will be exposed to a vast network because of my sexy stepping stones and overall comfort in being exactly who I am.

Anyway I will elaborate more on this for the talk I just needed to get the beginnings started then I have to write my bio so they can start promoting it. I have written a bio for myself so many times it deseves its own book.

Oh yeah! A girl I interviewed for Playboy before was in the office I went to yesterday and I was starstruck. It was a sign for sure. When she heard Raymi the Minx she goes YOU’RE RAYMI THE MINX! Marches in and we shook hands. She is a force to be reckoned with, mad respect.

So, being surrounded by large and in charge bitches is going to do well for me. I only feel more empowered moving forward now. My good friend told me to get out of my comfort zone a couple weeks ago and I could not stop thinking about that because no, I do not want to leave the comfort zone ever because I have fucking had enough but we all know I’m not done fighting yet and I haven’t accomplished half the shit I’ve set out to either.

I was also elated to see how not old I looked on camera too. I am a lot healthier than I was when I was on MTV and my hair does not look all fucked up either.

Here is an amazing email I received yesterday from my gay bestie drag Raymi the Minx:

yes…. if not now, then when…. it’s also a Tracy Chapman song that says that. Look it up!

Maroon 5 Is The Worst!

OMG I love him I’m so happy. Have a wonderful Friday everyone see you on facebook or twitter and instagram byeeeeeeeee.

These are for fun stills and not how I “really” looked on camera. I’m so glad I went for that tan holy crap.

Kathleen finally for her art! She is awesome love her.

I like biking too you know.

Hello bros.

Today is a big day for Lord Raymington. You ever get that feeling on the eve of something super scandalous you’re about to do, like nausea and anxiety at the prospect of the ensuing negative reaction. I had a similar feeling when I did MTV Creeps. I knew they were going to be ruthless with me and they were fucking ASSHOLES but I did it anyway. They seem to repeat my episodes often too. Which is contemptuous, but also thoughtful of them. Whenever I do crazier things over here, they start showing them over there and all my Little Raymis start blipping up and then new, younger people start adding my mom and I to Facebook it gets pretty nuts. But that is the magic and power of MTV. Do not fuck with MTV.

Anyway.

Two things. I know I’m about to be slut-shamed. And it’s going to be a big pile of bullshit because there’s this quasi-love your body (positive) movement happening right now, the cover of NOW magazine has two naked chicks on it.

And yes they’re big ladies. Bold and beautiful. But I seem to get treated with the opposite amount of respect and always fucking have when I take my clothes off. Skinny girls. Sorry, skinnier than me even girls, none of this body love ever gets directed at them or us. And when WE (want to) make bold nude moves, we get slammed for it.

So this blog post is just a wee head’s up warning that I hope you don’t fall into that heaping snarky pile of garbage because 1. I won’t care about what people say or think of me anymore, you have had long enough to be my friend and be nice to me, you’re in my past as far as I am concerned if you hurt, diss or ever attack me. 2. Be proud of who you are, be true to yourself, be yourself and just go for it. Don’t be afraid. Don’t worry about fucking up a future that hasn’t occurred yet.

A good friend of mine reminded me of my IF NOT NOW WHEN thing.

So I am doing NOW.

I’m not going to sit around waiting for Hollywood to call me anymore.

For too long I have worried about what people will say. And a lot will say shitty things. A lot will defend me and have my back and shockingly already have. I have a VIP ring of people I let in on my gossip-news etc before everybody else because everybody else slags on me. It’s a cut throat scene and we all want to dominate.

Obviously toot your own horn when the time calls for it but keep some cards to your chest and be humble, because at the end of the day you could be wrong.

Now the second thing I shard on FB. I’ve been leaving bread crumbs and clues around, provoking a little bit maybe. Women Are Posing Naked To Reclaim Their Bodies – If you chimed in on this Buzzfeed piece something supportive and yet trash me for living out my Nicki Minaj Kardashian complex in the same breath, you’re a chode. Just saying.

xoxo yours forever Raymi the Minx

++++

Now here’s my #TBT submit.

People are into these drawings and I am into people so lets do it. In the ever continuing life long pursuit of trying to show that I’m not all about selfies, I give you my craptastic and beloved cartoons. Allow me to illustrate how I illustrate if you will. If you wanna check out the rest from the past go to my drawing bad blog. or go to hell. Either way I do not care.

Drawing is tough. It’s not instantaneous. In the time it took me to draw these I did fifty thousand other things and got side-tracked a billion times. I’m going to draw some kind of rainbow next. Don’t even ask me why this is important it should be obvious. People are into these things or used to be and if I keep doing them I will dominate online again but only if I draw enough to capture the focus of like all of tumblr. Peace-a-cake fwahaa. Everyone knows that doing shit leads to doing other shit, boyyyoyoiiing! Afterwards I plan to fix my face, turn on my webcam and make some cinemagic. Gonna try and make webcam the new podcast. If you have a face for webcam then you should webcam it. Podcasts are great and all plus rising… my colleague just informed me of the unmarketing podcast rate sheet and I said do not show me I don’t want to pass out right now. Anyway, keep trying or keep dying.

whooops

Got kinda sidetracked some more by old pics of myself I came across urrrg attention span. When you want to just create everything all at once and have every platform, social network, phone, email etc at your fingertips it is mega hard somedays to avoid attention-span diversion.

I remember this carpet, it was a film fest night at casa loma very chi chi (shee shee?) and I showed up in this get-up and KILLED it with my orange hat. People were posing with me in their normie function attire. I also bumped into a ghost from the past and watched him look for me throughout the castle, thoroughly vindicated.

I remember when these shorts got me a lot of heat. I wore them a lot and then finally eventually it was okay for other women to wear short shorts and be no big deal about it. Women on women haterade is so gross. If someone works their ass off to look good in short shorts then by all means goddammit let them.

Here I am learning the power of narcissism and how to look fake pretty.

I just turned 19 and it was beginning to dawn on me that if I was going to exist in an online realm flame-warring with trolls and haters then I better armour myself with good looks so it’s one less thing they can pick me apart about. I didn’t realize how far this self-identity obsession would go. Now there’s things like “thinspo” blogs out there amongst other unhealthy things.

I really thought my hair when I was still living in Brooklyn made me look like The Shining kid. You’d think that was my favourite movie based on the two times recently I have spoken about it here but it’s not. Anyway I was 18 when I lived in Brooklyn and that didn’t work out because of 9/11. I moved there after I graduated from Highschool and I stayed until October, then lived in Canada for a little bit, then to Maine for a few months where I had a radio show called There’s something about Raymi. I was not expecting today to turn into memories but whatever. Take it or leave it, it’s winter and I have yoga to pretend to be doing anyway.

Speaking of the WTC you can see it behind me a month or two before it was attacked.

Erin Mills Town Centre on lunch break. My hair kept getting shorter.

My niece and I and my favourite man shoes.

Prom night. HAHAHA.

Edgy tongue piercing.

Me with a drawing of me by a friend plus my stupid tongue piercing.

After Maine I went back to my hardware store gig for a bit, dyed my hair darker, could finally get it into a ponytail and the horrid growing out phase was over. Except for those bangs. WHYYYYYY

This is one of the first pictures I ever blogged, it’s a scanned in film photo that’s how dedicated I was and how I got a following because no one was willing to take the time to do all this shit as digital cameras weren’t around yet. This pic is of me on the school grounds of St. Edward’s aka “Teddy’s” in Oxford, where I took advanced writing blah blah.

Brooklyn. I’m 18.

NYE a year before. That’s a Bruce Lee shirt. Pretty much all my photography endeavours were loaded with trying very hard to show how cool I was at all times. My friend barfed all over my city friend’s place this night/morning and I am wincing from trying this hangover elixir shake. Party on Wayne.

Nice Guess jeans. Thx Mom.

Going out this night in these legwarmers was nuclear in the attention they received. No one dared to hipster then. I would get approving nods from other hot/ter girls and could see them making mental notes to parody for later. #sinfluence

Been there, done that.

I was really proud of this modern fugly hairut. Teenagers are stupid. I went to England with super long blond hair. I guess I was finding myself or felt fat and ugly that day.

My KD Lang phase. You know you want to.

Another cool story smoking cigarettes fantastic.

This was a banner on my geocities page. Which was like my tumblr. I just should have put everything all on my blog back then.

Sauble beach whats upppp.

NYC the easter weekend I went before (still in high school) moving there to suss out my apt sitch.

My prom date. We were bros and both relieved to have a date as ultra did not care (I had a bf I was moving to nyc to be with) but my mom made me go and I am glad she did because I actually remember this life event and was awarded The most humorous person by the prom committee or student council I forget based solely on these two chicks in a businss class of mine sitting near me and hearing all the awful shit that came out of my mouth everyday. WIN.

Winter mixed black market fashions and Dido haircut.

That’s me in the orange wig and my old friend Laura. #stories #yo.

Hey remember DVDs??!

I pretty much looked like dog shit the last year of high school and super didn’t care/mentally checked out moving to NYC plus internet famous so screw all you guys hahaha.

Cliche patio photo Brooklyn.

The other BK that ruled our world. My first viralish experience was with this photo.

The first magazine I interned at.

New Hampshire, 18, old train.

Fatboy slim concert, Guvernment.

And me today. Sorry you had to sit through all that. Tomorrow we can go back to the present plus more of my Raymazing drawings.