i dyed my hair back to black so now i can stop whining and go back to straight ‘dissin chicks with blond hair.

on the flight back to toronto this fucker sitting beside me was listening to his headset super ass loud so i wore earplugs but i could still hear all the stupid channels he was watching though mostly he wasn’t even watching what was on he was reading stuff magazine. everytime he went to the bathroom i turned down his volume and acted like i didn’t when he got back. cool story hansel.

last nite we had band practise and afterward came back to try and watch the chapelle show but passed out cold and when fil woke me up to go to bed i was saying oh no my drink, referring to the rest of my wine and he shooed me away and drank it himself.

i fucked off on my crazy doctor appointment today i just realised this.

oh well.

nobody jay-walks in vancouver. why is it called jay-walking?

matt made the hugest friggin’ minute steaks last nite and we pulled the kitchen table way up to the television last nite while watching extreme makeover home edition and cried over all the little aids girls and their generous cancer mom and then played drink drank dronk screaming mean things at each other, screw each other over as much as possible monopoly. i was the first to put up houses on my ghetto property – baltic and mediterranean avenue but that wasn’t until two hours into the game. before that someone fnally landed on baltic i was like YES PAY ME BITCH and then fil threw two dollars at me and then one more to make it a one dollar ‘dis. fucker.

quote of the week: “Your mother sucks cock in hell, lick me, lick me.”

jen put her feet in the monopoly boxes and did the splitz and started cry-laughing when she saw the video of herself whilst on the fone wearing big stupid glasses with the tag still on.

um, ya so we cheated jen and i and in the end it worked against us because fil turned into a little girl out of nowhere and flipped the monopoly board and we tried to make him think that we were super duper angry about it and for a second there he seemed panic-stricken and believed us.

jen’s version

phil is full of shit

just came back from kitto and ate the shit out of beef udon soup. it was so good i wish i was eating it right now. last nite i hiccupped all the way back from bowling/drinking and then some and ate left over sushi. jen likes soy cheese. what a nutcase. that crap tastes like pretend food, fisher price plastic. when jen sits on her exercise ball the dogs bark hysterically and casey goes psychotic on his furry ball. anyway, it’s funny. fil handed our asses to us at 5 pin which was surprising because he usually can’t aim for shit. i’m dying my hair black when i get home. stamped it.

i drank a lot yesterday and felt wobbly this morning. matt said he couldn’t tell i was loaded. i said i am good at hiding it but fil, he knows because he is jedi master of detecting boozedness and then i try and say that i’m not and have this retarded look on my face and my eyes look in opposite directions and then i turn into pervotron sleazebag 3000.

we just got back from the gay forest what is stanley park.

they have a nice view from their condo.

fil and i are couch-surfing and sleeping so close makes me sweat like mental so my hair is extra retarded when i get up and jen and matt are good at acting like my hair isn’t insanely frizzy curly totally nerdy and then i go look in the mirror and want to die. i swear my hair looks like a big ole wig. i never should have dyed it.

i know i complain about it a lot , sorry.

oh ya i saw chloe yesterday, it had been years.

i think i am still drunk.

for some reason my lips are really chapped and feel inflated and puffy.

ok i am done talking about myself for now.

ps stanley park feels like you are in the lord of the rings.

also ps i like when casey out of nowhere goes mental on his fuzzy ball and barks at nothing, he makes me feel better about being special.

duuuuuuuude I am lord of the jenga.

arts county was funcity today. shoes and scary hard objects flying at us galore.

fil signed an autograph for some student groupie security girl who thought he was famous because he is a hundred feet tall. i signed zero autographs though i was blog spotted once.

i love the hell out of matt/jenn’s dogs and every now and then find myself thinking about hugging them and talking to them like i am autistic.

i didn’t bring my camera upload card thing so you’ll have to wait for pics.

k bye

i just watched frida and i liked it. i thought selma hayek would be a pompous tit but she wasnt. she was fiery and slutty and had a uni-brow.

fantastic.

i have discovered a new way to annoy fil by way of making gross tongue/mouth noises after eating.

“What are you doing?”

“It tastes good inside my mouth right now so i am tasting it again.”

“Do you like the taste of blood?”

then i drew hitler moustaches on everyone’s face in the globe&mail.

i think the waitress thought i was retarded because i stumbled over asking for a glass of water and asked for a glass of ice and then i asked if the chicken souvlaki on a pita would have garlic sauce on it.

that’s like asking if there are books at the library.

fil said to me that skid row called and they want their hair back.

har-huh.

we are already fighting over music that will be going on his ipod for tomorrow’s flight. he is not being fair. i don’t care what he says, kylie minogue AND justin timberlake will be on that thing, i am putting my foot down.

I hate it when guys shave off their moustache. Their faces look so bald. Remember when your dad would do it after 15 years and you’d be like, “Who the fuck are you?”

i have a mild heart attack everytime the television box settles and makes that big loud hollow tv settling noise out of nowhere and you’re like what do you think you’re an old house? jesus!