like, what stupid thing i wore yesterday, lets keep it light and simple guys, fluff fluff fluff, scary things BAD, nice happy things GOOD, guns BAD, balloons GOOD etc.
hey guys lets get ripped on ganj and order pizzas!
surrussly.
i am toppling forward in this one wow you care.
brosz7kowski’s pulled pork we all made fun of and judged while he was out having a smoke.
my drunken rant about diva cups seemed blog worthy material according to matt, so much so that i wrote down these words on the back of one of my cards DIVA CUP MEN SAVE THE ENVIR. CIGARS SUVS i totally know what i said but can you tell from that?
we stumbled out of pauper’s last nite and happened upon this scene. it was eerily quiet, matt was loaded and rambling and i shushed him cos i was already heavy into eavesdropping and had overheard about 4 shots being fired, then matt accidentally burned me with his smoke and blamed it on me haha right. anyway we stood around for awhile and i debated how tacky it would be to take pictures, i waited a good ten minutes i’ll have you know. when we first arrived only one ambulance was there then within moments police tape was up city tv shows up and cops and ambulances everywhere.
before the tape went up people were just walking right up to the bleeding dude and saying dumb shit.
here’s a video of meds putting him on the stretcher, he was shot in the arm, and was screaming his head off when we first showed up. the girl who was shot is up the street on brunswick where are the other ambulances were.
aw i sent my dad a link to this post and he said this
Hi Lauren … that’s scary …. please be careful . Your brother has Hailey this weekend … I’m leaving the office now for my little Suburban town weekend . Our Band plays at a Street Dance next Saturday … **** got a new job ********* ….. Eveyones talking about the new Batman movie .
this cool ass chick is coming by tomorrow to help fix my bikes, she works in a bike shop, omg bikes! she is even bringing me a lock (i’m paying for the lock) and she’s doing the fixing for free all i gotta do is buy her a drink also she is buds with my cuz cuz they went skinny dipping together TMI? she also told me how to get the rust off, bike lube (hahah) oil? and steel wool. once they’re both square and i ride around for a bit i’ll decide which one i want to keep. just thinking about both of them i feel like a total bike hog i am picturing myself floating in the air all around them in a circle and then they are ghost riding me standing up on their seats like water skis EXCEPT BIKES DO NOT RUIN THIS MOMENT FOR ME. i will also ask her how much they are worth. my friend matt doesn’t want a peddle braked bike so it’s pretty much up for grabs *if* i decide i can bear to part with it. the other one was my grandfather’s so i don’t even know if i can part with that guy.
haha look at cid waiting for fil if you are able to take your eyes of the vision what is my ass.
everyday around the time i do my hair and make-up i become invisible to cid as he sits and meditates by the door, attempting to transmit COME HOME NOW signals to fil. we are both pathetic losers for fil, as long as one of us is doing the mental chanting it’s fine by me. though i can’t help but be slightly insulted, i mean, i deal with his shit all day long, we make buds, i pay him some attention, give him lunch, arrange a fort or two no biggie but then come after work time i am a nobody. SOB.
me: no i am too fat for licks i mean yes i want it
mbroszkowski: I went and got a turkey burger for lunch today on a whole wheat bun
me: mmm and?
mbroszkowski: fries and soda water
me: no i mean where is this story going i thought u were going to say there was a rat in it so u got a coupon what is this coupon for if i have to buy something then u can fuck off with this coupon
mbroszkowski: no, I got it from a friend of mine, you have to buy fries and a drink and you get a burger for $1
me: what a sham
mbroszkowski: you still save like $5
me: well i dont eat fries and i dont drink pop unless there is booze in it so do i just print out a million of those coupon emails
mbroszkowski: exactly I drink soda water, I rarely drink pop too sweet
me: do they even have soda water at fast food chains
mbroszkowski: you don’t eat fries????? since an hour ago?
me: soda water with syrup in it
mbroszkowski: yes, every chain has soda water
me: oh well that time we ate poutine doesnt count cos we were in a dive bar
mbroszkowski: so when was the last time you had fries before then?
me: um the last time was also a time with u at the tap cos sass ordered poutine if someone says the word poutine near me or shows me it written on a menu and im drinking im fucked
mbroszkowski: that’s like me and mcdonalds
me: i only eat garbage if i am drunk or hung
mbroszkowski: me too
me: which is all i ever really am
mbroszkowski: hahaha I have occasional lapses though today I was trying to be as healthy as possible even though it was licks
me: like when we kept using the mcdonalds bathroom on canada day i wanted to buy a big mac everytime ok we have to stop talking about this right now
mbroszkowski: hahaha ok one last thing, I hate that I’m cursed with one at queen and spadina, ever since I moved there my drunken mcdonalds intake has like quadrupled
a sense of relief washes over you once you hit the pavement on the island and then it’s a race to get away from all the tourists so you can crack your first sneaky brew.
so this time we tackled the other side of the island where we came upon this fruity little park I LOVED IT.
flowers everywhere.
i am a witch.
oh my god i have to stop making these dumb picture faces.
drinking sanctuary.
two second timer you win this round.
dreamiest tree EVER.
I KNOW, that’s what i said!
i am reading this smut to fil.
the flower had already been pulled out by some punk dick my friends.
itched my scalp too much so i tossed it.
napoleon voice i caught you a delicious bass.
yes i cut my dress into a shirt like the black one.
short shorts backfire, a red ant bit me, fuckin motherfucker ruined a good half hour of my fun.
by the time we get to hanlan’s point my camera battery is low and i can never get a clear shot of the skyline.
requisite tourist pose.
guy left his smokes AND cellphone, came back and grabbed ‘em after i took this picture, i said oh GOOD. stresses me out to see things left behind cos you know the majority of the time some prick will come along and pocket it.
going in the evening during the week is a treat because the island is pretty deserted and it feels spooky.
place your bets on how many kifey looks i’ll get tonite in this get up:
sorry guys for being an egomaniac yesterday about this! i changed my shirt last minute and then i decided to just ignore every woman in the universe cos i actually wanted to enjoy myself so i didn’t really keep track. kifey isn’t even in the urban dictionary wtf. it means smelly, dirty, gross, pungent as in she has kife or kifey c**t. omg look at me censoring c u n t. i just think kifey and c**t together is the grossest thing imaginable. disgusting words.
yes i will be sure to strike all of these poses, winner um, gets a prize!
this is pretty much exactly what my drunk tank mugshot in manhattan beach looked like probably pretty much exactly, sprinkle a little winona cray cray hair on top and BAM, dead ringer. god i want to get my hands on it so badly and then die of shame and embarrassment and then make t-shirts out of it. ps. if i got a little head’s up about that ‘hood being the equivalent of daycare land maybe i’da lightened up a tad, yes, nothing is my fault. i wasn’t even drunk just totally insane! (even better!) and then from the back of the cruiser i started screaming that i was FRENCH CANADIAN then it was curtains. hi.
me: i have a joker zit
Phil: oh no!
me: oh yes at the corner of my mouth half a centimeter away so that it extends the width of my mouth to look like the joker’s mouth
Phil: better not be a cold sore
me: i have never had one fil its a zit it ISNT at the corner of my mouth it is near it jesus
Phil: i cant believe my gf has mouth herpes
me: yes from all the cocks i suck everytime your head is turned
ok as promised, finally, here is the full experience of the hidden lounge…
cozy little nook room for a gentle gathering pre/post-supper.
chutney magic, and horseradish creamy something or other wow my memory is terrible. no matter it was all tasty as hell.
fil chats up the chef.
v posh.
an awkward moment in time.
lemongrass lemonade?
delish cheeses.
round 1.
jess of prematurenostalgia fame, with her vegetarian alternative burger plate.
mine, tuna in the middle, meat to the right, the one on the left i have no recollection of other than that i fucking inhaled it.
portobello burger thing, w/ zuke in the middle i believe and cheese.
oh hi there i like the picture i already used better here lets all enjoy it again together…
those aren’t current berries, they’re a bit fruitier tasting, beneath the ice cream was something essentially like nutella, it might even have been, i can still recall the flavour of this dessert the pairing of it all was that good and i don’t bullshit about dessert cos honestly i could so do without it, my sweet tooth is practically non-existent.
pretentious shot.
destroyed.
meet paxton, he and the big titted chick to my right are wine groupies, we may just tag along on one of their niagara jaunts.
nothing beats a dark room of strangers sloshed on wine, oh the stories to listen in on and judge, my favourite.
flickr is being a total gay right now i have spent way too much time this morning trying to upload videos of me impersonating treebeard and galadriel reading trivial pursuit questions to fil, i know, when i think too much about it i am a little depressed for myself ha, not only did i nerd out and MAKE these videos but, oh whatever, I’M AWESOME! maybe by the time i finish this piece of shit post they’ll have processed on youtube. oh! i have a feeling my right wisdom tooth or whatever those guys are back there is about to burst through my gum, the same sore throat thing i had last time is creeping up on me and the other day i took some skin off brushing my teeth, i just know something’s up. lame.
oh hey here they are enjoy rippin’ on me!
i am galadriel
i am treebeard (once warmed up i do him way better)
