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versace’s house! then we went to a drag show.

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we got mango’d last night and are collectively hung for it. lois got smammered hahah it was great.

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i didn’t get to dance cos that place is a tight ship but holy crap what a show and night. so fun.

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flood.

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we went for delicious ribs at flanigan’s then drove the ocean blvd. we’ll do lincoln tomorrow i bet i think the hangover is going to determine what we can and cannot do today. tomorrow we move suites, i am psyched. pool time now and hopefully jet skiing. good thing i bought travel health insurance.

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i’m wearing this suit today. roxy.

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holy shit where’s a scale i am shrinking.

welcome to Raymiami Beach from raymi lauren on Vimeo.

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welcome to raymiami beach!

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i love all my new trinkets. new things high combined with vacation high. happy sigh.

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whoops looks like i have to remember to wipe my mystery camera lens.

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omg room service is here with a massive table of goodies. so happy!

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spa water? yes please. it’s like the willy wonka of spa waters up in hurr. i started with an orange infused one, then pineapple. in-between i had a corona.

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i am like the only blonde person for miles. loving it. brazilian babes with thong butts for miles too and dominican desires abound. no canadians here yet.

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i love that it’s scorching out despite partial overcast skies.

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this hotel is a dream. i’m going to check out the gym also so i’m not a weakling blob when i get home though im not chowing down or getting vacation fat at all like i was worried about, quite the opposite. vacation score.

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they come around with fozen grapes and evian misting bottles, they might even wipe my behind for me if i asked, that accommodating.

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checked out the beach finally too. the ladies went off for a walk while i blogged and attempted to turn myself back into a bat cave dweller and when i finally stepped outside, seeing the palm trees and glam i was like, i am so not doing that again tomorrow morning.

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i think these flats’ days are numbered.

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we seem to be the only spinsters here, lots of families and cute kids and babies to watch. i am doing pretty good at ignoring baby cravings, haven’t stolen one. yet.

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blue maxi dress is like wearing a hot yoga fog. i’d go naked if they’d allow it.

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suit change. great view.

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this is what happens when you blog: spoilings. makes me chuckle over ten years of snarky comments from assholes and friends trying to get into concerts or whatever. TOLD YA SO.

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i’ve requested some jack for lois.

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next time i will call in advance and not two hours before the office closes before a fourth of july holiday weekend. the hotel is booked solid but i won sarah over. thank you so much loews. can’t wait to see our next suite with wrap-around terrace, bar, and claw footed tub. dreeeamy.

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lois the hoarder has crammed all our bounty into the mini fridge hahaha i like razzin’ on her.

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greedy guts smile with style. ok doke time to get my glitz on and make a dinner outfit. i want to throw half the things i packed into a dumpster, i wish i could learn from my overpacking ways but i never ever will.

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on a wonderful late june afternoon last week (feels like a month ago now) teacher and i and colleague went on a lunch date to BOOM‘s st. clair location as that one has a great patio, but it was a gloomy day so we dined inside instead. i just scrolled through the food gallery, sorry, the “boomography” on their newly launched website and am now positively starving balls off. you’ve been warned.

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these guys are known for their cheeky copy re: boomography, reading the menu is a joy and their weekend brunch lineups are ridiculous. it is only suiting to run their blog feature today on canaduh day. missin’ you guys!

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not exactly sure what this day’s hangover was all about but we were definitely in colourful spirits. oh yes, the seafoody party was the night before.

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it’s not that i’m greedy, it’s just that i have to try everything in life or i will die. table etiquette is such that eating off another’s plate or whatever, not supposed to do it yeah? but this isn’t high tea and you’re the idiot who ordered a delicious BANANGO SOY smoothie – fresh banana, mango, soy milk and had the misfortune of sitting across from me.

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ya know what would make this smoothie awesomer? tara reid suggested a bit of rum. she would. see how i can barely keep my eyes open ahhaha.

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i had my heart set on a brewski and a burger. baby gets what baby wants and baby’s only in the corner cos of the natural window light and a table of babes were beside us.

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look how snotty teacher looks heehehh.

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i wish my hair looked this clean right meow. i have a vacation sun sweat rat’s nest at the moment.

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these yenta shades came into my life via the central. have a few other pairs of glasses. god bless the almighty lost and found.

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this minxing lasted 6 or 7 days. the night prior i was petting stingrays (saw one in the water in ft lauderdale, got a picture too, scary things) so you’re not supposed to get them wet, you can and it’s unavoidable when showering and doing makeup and what not but if i was super good to them they’d last for 10 days. next round i’ll see how long i can have them for in full. it’s fun to remove a few and then paint random nails various raymbo mental problems colours.

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look it’s me! i hear there’s quite the raymbo ambassador race afoot at the moment. my little raymis are gunnin’ for svelte bods, excited to see who my new competition will be.

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i finally ripped my j brand pants. you know how you put them in the dryer to get them tight again but you still have to perform various stretches and wiggling to get them glued to your hips? while squatting like a pharaoh my inner right thigh split, and on a skinny day. awesome. i was wearing these when i bailed on my longboard and despite scraping my left knee up, the jeans never tore. all it took was my major toned supersonic muscular thoroughbred thighs to do it.

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an inner thigh jeans rip plus commando = living on the edge. andrew said raymi, always be cutting edge, when i said tell me what i am doing wrong, i will play any corporate safety dance game you like and he said no raymi, keep being a slut basically. fine.

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check that chick’s two-toned hair over there. cool.

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and her curious stink eye. i was going to give her my card but then i wimped out. just let curiosity get the better of ya instead.

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colleague always gets a chorizo sausage and a waffle or pancake/french toast whatever like he is 4 years old, what is this denny’s? no thank goodness. boom is infinitesimally classier than that dump.

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my classic burger with half n half salad and sweet potato fries. i must have it all. 100% pure beef, served with sweet potato fries and fresh daily garnish.

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i only eat rainbows.

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teacher had an omelette. which one? FARMER GIANNI – fresh baby spinach, roasted red pepper and caramelized onions with Swiss cheese i feel like a detective comparing the menu descriptions to this photo, think i got it right? ps. those potato wedges are to die for, seasoned with rosemary, nice and salty. i just salivated into my lap.

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punk rock punky brewster burger. oh man can you imagine what my menu copy would look like?

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aaand this is how we NOM. nom diddly om. num nom nom.

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and for once i get a bite of colleague’s french toast, that pig normally scarfs it all down before i have a chance (how rude) like hey, who’s the star here? i’m so busy posing, eating and thinking i don’t get a chance to steal a bite ever and then, traditionally i’m like, WTF? gesturing to his empty asshole plate and he hangs his head in shame. teacher is like, who is this animal?

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this is how you burger judge. verdict? matched and topped expectations. i’d been on a burger binge for awhile there and capped it off with boom’s classic. next it will be burritos?

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if you can get passed the disgusting cheese dangler you can see my little lip piercing divot. well, at the very least it matches my earrings.

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all done, more please. their americanos are the best, even when i’ve already had a pot of coffee and am moving onto lunch i will still order a coffee (with soy) because it gets me all jacked and cuckoo bananas in a good way.

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don’t forget the raymi boom discount you cheapskates can take advantage of if you’re smart enough. or the all day breakfast for $4.99. when you sit down tell your server about me, or when you go to pay, say you and i play jump rope together or you read my blog and they will be more than happy to hook you up. people tweet me all the time when they’re there and then for some reason get all confused when it comes to their discount, shyness and confusion, two of my most mortal enemies. i am a cheapskate and there will never ever be confusion when it comes to payment time, oh i can get hooked up here? done and done. so don’t forget the raymi D List and if you read my blog, you’re on it. i am trying very hard not to swear at your stupidity right now. VURRY HARD.

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look how skinny i am after that burger. it’s a slimming diet burger, not greasy. about half way through i commence dismantling it like a raccoon might, tearing off bun sections here and there while speed shoving potato fries into my maw and forking salad. raymi eating is an experience. my ex’s ex watched me eat a steak salad once and said i eat interestingly, i am a happening. the raymi never stops.

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i called the floor to co-ordinate outfits. emilio commented once that he loves boom’s design, decor. he’s one of those modern design groupies, someone i might be like too if i wasn’t such an eccentric slob.

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i love these shoes. maybe i’ll wear them on the fourth of july. i love theme-wear.

boom loves me and by proxy, you. it’s good to be back, check out the new site. there’ll be much more bells and whistles added soon like all my blog features and other interactive social media ticker tapes and maybe a virtual humburger tour haha who knows. aw i just got a missing toronto pang. hope you’re all having fun. as for me, which way to the beach?

ps. blog post title is a play on the B 52’s dee-lite song groove is in the heart.

pp.s my blog loves comments. it has a mind of its own plus why am i deleting spam like crazy all for nothing but tumbleweeds?

shopping haul from raymi lauren on Vimeo.

first time ever going to macy’s today, i think it was my first time. didn’t buy anything though.

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i am so glad i didn’t get rid of this dress. how stupid would that of been? tres.

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we are having a blast. the girls are bringing me a burrito. going to eat it in two bites. tomorrow is canada day! we are going to wear red and try and cause some mischief no doubt. tonight is a rest night. ooh lets order a movie. mom has all the best photos on her camera. i have handfuls uploaded but i am too dumb right meow to figure out which ones i’ve blogged and haven’t. this blogging shit requires thinking sometimes. ughhhh. remember when i used to spell it ungh? those weren’t the days eh. now i will do my nails and toes. fluorescent pink. hope it looks good.

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once upon a time in a life i used to live i sat beside this argumentative neurotic endearing bafoon at a wedding reception (he hit on me all damn day but i was engaged and then he insisted to debate sarah palin with me) on ward’s island by the name of spencer rice. you may know him as spenny of kenny vs spenny fame.

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i, like you, am a total star fucker in where if you are somebody i want to know you, because i too am somebody. the amount to which i want to know you is inversely proportional to how much i feel you want to know me. if you got raymi’s back then raymi’s got your back all the way too, which is why i am fastidiously speed typing through slow wifi on my precious holiday for this sleazebag old buddy ol pal of mine as his new show SINGLE WHITE SPENNY airs tonight for the very first time at 9.30PM EST and then again at 11.30PM on showcase. i cannot watch it as i am in miami beach with my bloodshot eyeballs lolling around in their sockets nursing a warm can of corona, it, in short, is “the life” one might say. ok where was i with this shill, oh yes, here is an actual review of the show. you have half an hour to get your popcorn and beer together. please let me know how it is and if i want to have anything more to do with this guy, i can’t spill the beans but, yeah, it’s in your best interest to become a liker of all things spenny.

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i’ll brb with pics of my shopping loot. i shopped til i literally dropped through my hangover anxiety attacks oh god. earrings, cupcake necklace, 3 bikinis, a dress, shirts shorts nail polish hell ya. also will show photos of the swanky hotel we just checked into, mad ballin’ place i’ll be plugging the crapola out of it as they’ll be hooking lil miss social media number one blogging sweetheart uppppp. they just gave me a comped fridge too and the last two nights we’re moving to a bigger suite with a terrace. oh joyous rapture.

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girl crawl getting ready from raymi lauren on Vimeo.

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my brains feel like a stomped orange at the moment. classy! we went to the blue martini last night. i practised some burlesque on a riser. dennis rodman was there, we encircled him. more on that later. it’s gross that people can smoke here indoors what is this the nineties? i am collecting stories but have no time to share, hopefully i won’t forget them all. must pack now, we leave for miami. ok bye!