dear internet

it is imperative that you vote for me tomorrow and the day after that and the day after that, the votes i have already will not be carried over into round 2 so basically round 1 was just giving everyone a heads up on how obnoxiously lame and naive they are to my following, mostly these people are political windbags who started blogging last week and they are all saying that i am posting nudes as a ploy like how convenient of me to do that – hey listen up geniuses, EVERYTHING i have done EVER is a ploy that’s how you become famous on the internet, not by writing about bathing your son or planting sage in your fat ass garden you have to be good looking and smart and funny, sorry, remember highschool? well this is it all over again.

everyone else VOTE VOTE VOTE FOR RAYMI EVERYDAY UNTIL DECEMBER 1st starting TOMORROW and tell all your friends and their friends – i am in three categories

best blog
best humour blog
best personal blog

hit cntrl f ‘raymi’ to skip to my name don’t bother voting for anyone else they are not important. well you can at least look at them once but once you look at their boring crap-o-blogs think how retarded it would be if i lost to them wtf?! they’ve already jumped the gun and are writing whiney cop-outs and shit talking me, i wasn’t planning to go that route but feh, meh bleh and so on.

oh and there will be consequences if i lose, i will take my blog down for a long period of time AND DON’T THINK THAT I WON’T.

YOURS RAYMI THE ENFORCER

have a nice friday, as for me i will be drunk and playing guitar hero 2 wearing a batman costume and here is a picture of my friend noel and his celebrity look-a-likes as evidence of how fucking wicked my blog skills are:

yesterday i discovered that my good friend lise is a RACIST. we were on the couch watching a different world and i said oh come on how is there a college with all black people not one white person (thinking in my head this show is racist) and then lise says that it’s based on a for real college BUT THEY LET THE WHITE PEOPLE IN.

THE? WHITE PEOPLE?!

then i called her out on it, you see, although lise looks white, she is not, she is indian something or other so i guess she has deep hatred stored up for the white man and probably hangs out with me to spy on the white woman and makes up little jokes about me in her racist journal when she gets home.

my last name is white and i thought her nickname for me _whitey_ was suppose to be affectionate but now that the cat is out of the bag thanks to a different world, she’s gone back to calling me raymi.

oh and don’t you worry lise thanks to you i am now FULLY AWARE about how much of “a different world” it really is.

Mike: I mentioned you on blogTO
the blogTO server is really slow right now, in case that link doesn’t work…

me:
yeah it’s chugging slowly
have u been reading those fucking political douches
they never heard of me before and they are all shocked that i am #1
like get over it
this is evidence of how self indulgent and nerdy they are

Mike: the early adaptors with their ear to the ground and respect of all things web 2.0 know you – those guys are all johnny-come-latelys and very old school

me: yes
this means i super duper have to win and beat them all out
cos everyone can have a political opinion but it’s the bullshit that i come up with daily that truly matters

Mike: it means you actually have influence – which must drive them crazy

i’ve been reading my book, it just arrived in the mail, marketable depression, not the one i’m working on now, and i keep thinking wow i’m smart or this makes me look smart which is not how i felt half a year ago or even a whole year ago, over time my perception has changed about it and that’s nice, i think. mostly, my memory is just destroyed it’s like i didn’t even write that book and it’s not even about me.

i found what i want fil to get me for xmas, it’s a jacket. originally i wanted wallabies but this jacket is pretty amazing i’ll just buy the shoes myself.

inspired by raymi

remember this?

Raymi the Minx had a substantial lead on the other four challengers in round one voting, but that doesn’t mean anything for round two. Clicking on the link brings me to a Blogspot blog with a simple layout, but an interesting colour scheme, a nicely drawn banner, and some interesting photographs. This is a hip looking blog and an interesting window into the life of an interesting urban dweller. My main complaint is that her blog takes too long to load up fully, although the design compensates by delivering the meaty content first and allowing the peripherals to come up later.

bowjamesbow.ca

interesting how i am still pretty unknown to many on the internets.

results are in i’m winning for best blog and best personal blog but rick mercer is beating me for best humour blog so all my harassing wasn’t all for naught. i’m second behind rick mercer how nice would it be if a non-television “celebrity” beat out rick mercer? so yeah voting opens again on the 25th of november. thank you everyone who voted thus far you’re the best oh no wait, i am.

The top 5 blogs in each category move on to round 2. In the event of a tie for 5th place the category will be expanded to add these additional blogs in the 2nd round of voting.

Subject: hurro
To: rick@rickmercer.com

love raymi

i went to my cousin’s smelting party (you get a bunch of nets and catch smelts when they are “running”) at ozone creek here is what happened — the party gets all end of dazed and confused and people take to their tents and campers so we have to go home but home is far and we were staying at this camp at gravel river about 10 miles away so we’re on our way back and we got the least drunk one to drive who was also the MOST stoned and we are in this giant hippie van that is from 1969 and seats 19 but there are only 10 of us, my cousin’s friend swany is simulating a blowjob on a smelt, the only smelt of the night that was caught, and he stole it from the guy who was so happy to have it and my cousin was very strung out on coke so he punched him in the head and THAT’S when we hear the driver go

what the fuck is a horse doing on the middle of the road in northwestern ontario

he has time to say all that and then BAM we pegged off a moose and i looked behind us and the moose was still standing! it was like in dazed when they throw the bowling ball through the window then we all laugh and pass out at gravel river the end oh we found some fur in the side of the van on the window pane

that is the end of my story