OK dumbos here’s the rest of yesterday’s adventure.

Note to self, get THOSE pictures off teacher’s phone to blob. It never ends.

And so, European sensation quartet better known as The Turkish Delights seen here, plunge in to their private superstitious pre-show ritual. Nobody knows what it is that they do during this hour long hot tub sojourn of solitude, (and they never will! gwonnnnng)(that is the sound of a golden gong gonging btw) this mysterious practice. We expect that it is awesome, though. Janet’s hat is a legit paramedic’s hat, I want it. So pointy and Austrian.

This is the Nickelback of hot tubs. It plays tunes and is riddled with massage jets everywhere. With fyber-optic ever-changing disco lights too. Awesome. It’s like a spaceship pod in a techno movie in the future, very Abyss. Full score marks for this tub. That is hot.

Ah gad I want to go back. Day time hot tub would be hilarious there eh mom? Teacher is off Wednesday (exams) ;).

These are feet that look like hands, teacher’s, I didn’t know he had flippers. It’s tough being the elegant one all the time.

It was a cold night, a frosty one indeed. So many matching yellows seen here.

Teach is pretty slavic-looking too. I wonder how many secret boners he got? AHAHH he said six.

The hat thing was my idea. Thanks for these matching hats Lois!

Fun times indeed.

Papa took these, he was switch-hitting from his own camera too. I think he might show family highlights to others through that device. He has always had a camera on him, he’s so cute. His pictures never come off the digital camera though, I don’t think they have a computer even. Or a cell phone.

Checking for rolls. After that gargantuan plate after late brunch you never know right. I sure am porcelain though.

Mom if you ever feed Stella again after we tell you no there will be secret scary punking consequences. I know you can hear these words now! YOU HAVE SO BEEN WARNED.

Dugan is A MOTHERF%CKER indeed. Teacher is shy so he didn’t intervene when he saw Stella being stalked, I went haha yeah right. Then my mom cornered her under a table and it happened. That cat is prehistorically huge for a cat. Freak of nature. I fed Stella lots of stuffing and chicken with gravy to apologize.

Some guy delivers high rollin’ frozen meals to the entire neighbourhood, awesome right? My mom’s even had lobster tail. Anyway that’s what we were eating I was like what am I eating, turkey? It’s gigantic there is no way this is all from one chicken cos teacher had his own goddamn very one, stuffed with stuffing. We did two wishbone showdowns from them ahah. I won. Guess what I wished for.

I did not mean to match all that stuff. My hair was kind of retarded in the back.

Mom I was loaded when I watched our creeps episode but did they show our text messages or was that on my episode? I have a surprise for you on Thursday ps. ;).

I love this archway.

OOZ-A-BOO-BOO-DOO-DOO!? All important questions asked to Stella at least 50 times daily.

Nana got sozzled on the bottle of Bailey’s I brought. We partied in the hot tub it was a typical dysfunctional birthday party with the family MTV should have been there haha. My uncle talks to all ten of the house pets like how my mother and I do, cranks Nickelback tunes in his Hummer. The back story to all of these shenanigans you would need an entire day’s time to listen. Yes we are that family.

Every time we see them they death guilt scare me HARDCORE. I’ve had a death fear for forever, “This might be our last Christmas together” yes thank you for announcing that! So I am hyper conscious of it at all times. “Get a picture of our legs beside each other HE MIGHT DIE RIGHT NOW!” Meanwhile he is just chilling watching TLC ha ha. My smother used to pretend pass out fake-die (like in movies) in bed on me too when I was a tweenager and I’d freak OUT but knew she was deeking me out so then I’d start to suffocate her with my hands over her face and mouth until she resisted me hahahah ok moving along now.

I like a room that is entirely a couch, it was cranked to 73 in there. The volume controls are on the wall very Run’s House, right?

My mom and I will post anything.

My mom goes ooh so Diane Arbus. Nerd. Follow us to our spaceship now.

Why would someone lie about their age to be older? So that people tell her she’s younger looking? Oh wow that’s it for now thank christ. Uploading more stuff kay bye. Teacher came home early today and my blog just chugs along at its own high traffic frequency pace also, Mondays are say anything/underpants Sunday spillovers, you didn’t know? Go read a lofty high class cultured blog then.

I would join this cult.

These bottoms are diapers on me now.

STEAM IS SLIMMING. Ha.

Ahh so relaxing. Good family times. Stella was stalked and attacked by Dugan the psycho cat from hell that also has tore open my Nana’s hand, a vein, ugh. She showed me her vein and I imagined it instantly and started dry-heaving. Stella is alright, hope it’s not that deep. So we locked Dugan away and then four more girl cats showed up. My mom lives in a nuthouse. Fun place though I was like see this, it’s called Easy Street AND YOU LIVE ON IT, when she tried to have a pity party. Your only issues are OPP: Other People’s Problems-oriented. Lady, you got off. For now.

Anyway, legit zonked. Night!

Okay fine one more retarded picture for the road. Literally.

At least my arm is skinny kay, THANKS, bye.

Welcome to the last minute gift sprint because my nana is 831 now. All of the good stores were closed, wait a minute what am I saying? They all suck and I don’t think my nana would like a tanning package so lets hit the lcbo after this pointless waste of ghost town time stroll through the wind tunnel what is known as liberty village market (or the name that it is actually called, fine suit yourself).

Hello? Are you in there? Do you want some of these expensive eye stinging soaps?

I guess I’ll have to keep looking.

I’ve changed into a girlier sweater so she can’t hurt my feelings about being such a sloppy disappointment. What’s that? I can’t hear you over the hot tub IT’S THE JETS, THE JETS THEY’RE SO LOUD What? My cousin is engaged? That’s great!

I got her Bailey’s. A bracelet she can drink.

Should we bring the dog? I think she might go bananas, hopefully in a good way.

THANKS FOR EVERYTHING BYE!

ps. last day to enter to win the golden deeldo contest, click the vibe image on my sidebar up above. See you on the QEW.

Must buy angel wings. HUGE WHITE WINGS.

Can only keep my leg up so long, he can’t capture it. Lightning fast. What is that the word of the day or something?

I enjoy spinning.

And Point zee toe. For this you have to bend your knees in a bouncy kung-fu stance, in preparation to kick your leg high up. I do forty kicks in a row, alternating legs every twenty. This weekend is all about stretching it oot. Kay back to dance aerobics rehearsal practice party time now. The tree finally came down. We beat the month. Oh sweet lazy cabin fever month.