Monthly Archives: January 2012

We Jamba we jam!

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I want a Jamba Juice tornado tattoo, it’s part of my harajuku princess doll brand and extremely, seriously important. My camera ghost date suggested I just ask for them, ah duh. Temp Facial tattoos are adorabz on little kids (and big kids).

Daddy can we try them all? Hey folks, yesterday I tripped on in to the inaugural Canadian location of Jamba Juice :) located in the heart of the Annex, and much like a kid in a milkshake store I rode the Jamba tornado like a champ. The sky was my budget limit (that came out right, right?) so I had a flat bread as well (pizza mmm) because when I hear ANYTHING YOU WANT I do not disappoint.

I come from the era of poor taste in design so I appreciate these Willy Wonka extras adorning the walls. Fun is fun is fun.

Jessee spells her name the same way my best gf Jessee (late elem-early high school) spelled her name. I ripped her on it sometimes which is why I was amazed that the legacy carries on. She’s making a Jamba for one of my band mates, I said surprise me, no, them. Think she had fun with it and they were all quite pleased and satisfied and happy.

What is horse teeth about to do here?

Are there any strawberry seeds stuck in my teeth? I had a full fruit one, which are thicker then I had two BOOSTS added, one for immunity (like Survivor and to not get sick) and the other, energy, for band practice. I love the concept of boosts, it makes me feel good about myself because I never take vitamins or do anything lately that is health conscious which is another love, vitality and cleansing, nutrients, treating your temple right. While you’re smoothie or shakin’ it up it doesn’t hurt to throw some magic powder in there.

Can’t wait for summer, I’m going to switch up my running route every so often and head for Jamba Juice and run with a juice home. I find that if I run with a water bottle and switch from hand-to-hand, each arm becomes toned. I bet you guys forgot how much of a work-out maniac I am. You know Venus Williams is aligned with Jamba too? We are looking into a tennis match for Raymeh and her lol it’ll be like a tennis ball machine assault and me jumping around like Mr. Bean all over the place, like paintball, can’t wait Venus! (I also know a very inappropriate joke involving the name Venus, BFF4LIFE).

I am so flattered to be aligned with Venus Williams, I mean, Jamba Juice, I just picture them in the boardroom, strategizing and of all the people in the universe (they already chose planet Venus) they chose moi to lead the Jamba pack.

So I’ll just run over to Bakersfield Cali (I’ve been there!)(I prefer LA) from Liberty Village and… they’re updating the canuck website jambajuice.ca to have all relevant Canadian information, location, news, all that but for the list of smoothies and fruits available, it’s more or less the same to scope jambajuice.com. Considering how many locations are in the states (over 700) we’ll see if we can hook up my American Little Raymis (there’s tons of you).

Ha ha Raymi spotted reading The Grid! Like when stars get busted buying copies of Us weekly with their faces on the covers. Camera ghostman creeped me in the streets!

It was chilly. I am determined to become the bastion of health that I once was I don’t care if it’s Antarctica, any time is a great time for a smoothie. January is the month of new resolve so start in on that health kick asap.

Saw popo everywhere yesterday, the cute one in the lead smiled at me cos I was kind of smirking for the camera but I knew it was probably a long time since he’d last seen a snowflake princess and he liked it.

Great facade, oh and the store’s too.

I kept losing him then getting paranoid and feeling stupid for smiling like a lunatic at nothing, passersby appreciated the dopiness. The Annex is my old neighbourhood, I love it, have lived here twice in my lifetime it’s a great location for a Jamba Juice.

I can tell you infinity stories about this stretch of road. Many blog post settings occurred here, that’s right Little Raymis, lay back and picture it!

Stalk to me baby.

Uh what is this the Edison twins?

Oh right I forgot what we were doing here blobbing is so fun, kay so, pick your size and because this is on the company’s dime cha-ching, larges for all! Check. Next, select your flavor and it’s spelled in American so we all can understand what is going on here. This part was difficult because I was so indecisive. I went vegan in the end (no dairy, you can sub for sorbet) which I try to scrimp on at all costs, cheese/dairy, not always but you know how I like to keep trim. I saw all the bods on celebrity big brother UK last night and was like ok Minx, time to get more serious.

Remember to stretch, keep those joints limber, don’t stiffen up, multi-task while deciding over 60+ dranks oh my. This is what I will look like come summer except in a Jamba Juice coloured unitard (with cape?). Or turbo-babe super tight spandex running gear, maybe a bikini top. With Stella. And sweating profusely oh man a juice will be so refreshing I’ll suck it back in under a minute.

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Lost and found shoulda stayed lost

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Lois got me this swanky watch. I am making teach look up when we have to take the tree down, we are whiners and don’t want the bubble to end he goes back to school on monday wah wah for him. He said today is the epiphany! Oh noes. Watching big brother and all our shows including creeps and j shore with that thing on all goddamn night. Take it down on le weekend.

Welcome to Neptune.

The last cougar night of 2011. There was going to be one tonight the first of 2012 but I am tired everyone is it’s good to rest up, at band tonight I was overcome with the tireds and am I sick? paranoia.

You are so beautiful.

Just when you thought I was done being narcissistic, newp, you are wrong. Christmas day on way to Oshawa. It was fun and scary and exciting and cut throat, people on the roads were insane. This is passing the skydome.

Aw this is dragging Christbreakfastmas out longer, le petit happy sigh, I got these for desserts in kensington market. Dad are you mad at me I called you after NYE and you haven’t responded.

These were deadly.

I hate wearing black to the keg but I always end up wearing black to the keg and then don’t bother with pics cos my mom does it but also in the bathroom look at this, what is the fucking point, oh it’s our floating heads, yeah cool seen.

Oh it is so on next year metro.

NYE hit list. Too bad I had to order booze delivery twice, to get more for our after party and then the next day cos we weren’t finished yet.

Then some day or other I made us two rounds of breakfast potatos and eggs with various hot sauces and mados. So british and so not how I used to eat when trekking my way to skinny town. Pretty uninspired but so delish when hung.

Lets wear white next time!

I am cool.

Turkey Tacos from last week, tacos everywhere, taco bonanza. Cheese light sour cream an airplane sized bottle of tequila we shared/shot then tucked in. We put a towel down underfoot for safety.

I took many pictures. The sour cream starts to glob all over the place, I was full after one, had two, wanted to die, teacher had three was was like aaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuuuughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh no idea what we watched. Apparently we spend a hundred bucks a month on the zune/netflix.

This sprite loves me.

Speaking of tumblr, I started another one today for my drawrings. it’s called drawing bad still but the url is celebratingmediocrity.tumblr.com it’s nothing special yet.

This was on our street I made her take a pic of it there is no point with my phone but yeah, a hipster died here so sad. JUST KIDDING!

It is a scientific fact that people in my family do not grow up.

Big and thick like at sneaky dee’s, don’t fry/brown the onions up in to nothing.

Bought three packages of scallopini (thinly cut) cos it cooks faster, is cheap, and it’s funny to make this around xmas and it was a turkey that never made it to the table sad face no problem buddy we’ll help you out feliz navidad.

It would have been nice if I got an iphone this phone/camera sucks. Teach got a new one and it is so sick! ijealous.

Kay that’s it bye now.

it’s a bad man’s world and i’m a bad bad girl

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I’ve got pics on my phone but they are garbage and that thing is already a piece of garbage too, GRRRRRRR.

I am trying very hard to relearn PC computing. I feel loads stupider than I normally stupidly feel. Band practice later on today and a special treat surprise or two. I am playing with paint at the moment, it’s nice that it’s less ghetto than it used to be, less pixellated. I can’t draw worth shit I know that but that’s not the point, it’s the genius captions and humour that is what I want to be better at in between being really, really, exceptionally good looking of course. Courtney and I watched Contagion last night it was scary and I had nightmares. Two nights in a row of nightmares.

Creeps airs tonight, my episode is on january 17, after jersey shore. I heard a rumour that it was pretty scandalous which I find hilar now that crotchety old people are finally going to be introduced to a new generation of do-anything-they-wants, not surprised they were surprised.

Might have to run for the hills when my ep airs.

This evening my nickname was cranberry tights. I ripped open a bag from my travels containing all of my tights and socks and stockings, yay. These are AA and winter thick I love ‘em.

This was after dinner at bar vespa. so full. dying on floor. Watched megamind, it’s so funny can’t believe I judged the book by the stupid big blue headed cover. Will Ferrel and Brad Pitt, Tina Fey, all star voice cast.

I signed on to be donated for date charity again this year. Last year I got $200 and this year I am 200% babelier so I bet I could go for more.

Should I get her a diamond collar?

What is the point of the leather band thing, courtney said it was christmas series related. ok.

Crimpy hair!

Lie down again. I just had a fish taco. HAhahahhaha.

I have a blogvertorial to do in a bit so I am just going to photodump this on you guys if that’s alright. We have been sleeping in lately catching up on the day we expedited with casie after new years lol. O_O.

In complete agreement with you, a bit gratuitous.

For dinner we had meatballs, risotto balls mmmm and chorizo fonduta. Side plates are 5 bucks on tuesdays. Another good local. Prob do a food blast post soon.

This must have been before we left because I don’t look like I want to die here.

Arrogant. But I like the pockets.

Dumpy babushka and those shoes are wrong. But kind of right. Not for this season though.

Now to plan another outfit. It never ennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnds.

I’m the oldest friend you never had

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This is a small, it’s got a tear/rip in the crotch from my gargantuan long legs and I was attempting to high kick like casie, which i can barely do and especially not with this thing on.

We ate this for days.

It was so cold this day.

Ahh scary! Scarilicious.

Then I had crimpy hair all day long the next day kindergarden styles and we had a lovely dinner at bar vespa i’ll blob tomorrow as for now, it’s dinner with DrunkgirlTO tonight wheeeeeeeee!

self-loathing is my business and business is good

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Our new play is going to be a hit it’s called Goldilocks got her gay dad a bear.

I will have to sew my red button back on this dress.

I am pissy right now cos I’ve yet to master this keyboard it’s all in outerspace symbols and doesn’t do the memorized macbook commands I keep punching in. I know it just takes a bit of time but I don’t have any of that!! I slept in after a nightmare about my mother dying and it was very emotional and then I turned into a monster and made us clean fight clean fight fight clean. Meanwhile I am supposed to be chained to this laptop THAT I CANNOT FUCKING TYPE ON getting my schedule sorted, pr emails, blog, same-old. Blogging ain’t always easy and yes I’m complaining I should have been a plumber.

Ha ha exactly fully agree Sar-ugh. This is a great picture though.

The gingerbreadhouse is a lovely cozy Christmas den of wonder if I could do wall-to-wall white lush carpeting or fur, I would.

But the third porridge was just right. Like I’ma bust in to someone’s house and eat porridge.

Sarah was like I remember when you bought this dress! Funny.

Everyone thinks this guy is a big comedian now haha (my clothes, we dressed him, yes I am a giant baby) I bet that dress would be stunning on you in Jamaica. I bought it in Burlington during boxing week clearance, it’s really hard to buy a summer dress in the winter, it’s like, wicked selfish I think. I am also not one with the ability to plan my life so far in advance. I’m always like, by summer I’ll be a millionaire so nothing will matter then I’ll have 8 blue maxi dresses.

Teach said now I will know for sure of my friends/colleagues/family who reads your blog after these pictures cos they can’t not say something. I know everyone reads it because NO ONE wants to talk to me for days afterward. Everyone always hates someone or something that I do/blog. It’s a new year lets all get along and just agree with every decision I make.

We had good conceptual photo ideas and follow-through.

Close the fucking curtain what are you trying to blind me! ahha.

Yes, it just keeps going.

You look like a choir angel boy/girl.

Oh my god haha I gave those shades to sammy for his trip to Jamaica. Irie. Teacher, baby, you look gorgeous in that dress. Everyone thiefed each other’s costume ideas.

Not trying to sneak away now are ya?

Ok time to pretend in a picture that we are cleaning this all up now.

I should start wearing that more often with a beret and scoff at people in coffee shops.

CUTE!

I have run out of words.

What would your burlesque name be?

One of the winning outfits for sure.

It’s nice when a doll comes over to play with you.

Always get some tricep extensions in if you can manage it.

Look like I am fading here finally, Sarah peaced out soon after this and Sammy was nodding off a little so we sent him away too.

Nope not done yet.

Are you having a nice time at my after party? Yes it is my dream come true.

I never get to get in on the discussions about my ass, I get to overhear them as I pretend to be busying myself with something as I eavesdrop in on the girls gushing all jeals. One of Oprah’s favourite things!

Earlier that evening the three seconds that I danced lol.

No wonder I lose everything and am such a giant loser, purse is always spilling open I’ll be better this year I swear! Next post will be leftovers from some other post or other. Dating a teacher during xmas break requires focus and drive, 2 weeks of playing adult house pretty much. C’est la vie.

Raymbo Brite

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Dez is a guy that Raymimposter roped in, remember that? Thanks to her I am getting custom-designed Raymbo Brite shoes. Burn on that bitch much? Yes, very much so. Bet she is reading right meow, hi loser!

Dez made a pair of shoes for MICHEAL BUBLE and delivered them to him on Saturday Night Live! Here is what he said about his experience there I am so jealous. Dez is in his watershed moment of career success I am very happy for the guy, he’s where I wanna be, got mad haters from jealous dork artists and the like, can relate. One day we will hang and get obliterated but for now we work our asses off aiming for the almighty dream. I think attentding the SNL after party means you’ve made it. Remember, you are who you hang out with so surround yourself with the best as much as is possible.

SNL was amazing. Pretty much a bucket list thing I got to do and went to after party and got high-five drunk, slammed a shooter with JimmyF, and basically O . O ‘ed slash perv stared at about a million beautiful women. Totally cool to see live and got to check out bunch of sets at 30Rock.

Brb with tickle trunk dress-up NYE party pics! I’m switching over to my new laptop now, goodbye old friend macbook pro I overheated you one too many times.

Hi! I should get those for my dad for suicidal scrabble games.

Sick guy. What a genius.

Here is another celeb pair. Done for heavy metal band Anvil and their rock documentary ANVIL:The Story of Anvil.

Signed by the band as well on the tongue if you look close.

Kay bye for real now and be right back.

May the new year bring me lots of riches and bitches in stitches

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Lauren and I could have a nice show together, Loren and Luhren (and for the ten billionth fucking time that is how you say my name and why I invented Raymi and it is confusing to be around Laurens cos I think they’re calling my name because some REFUSE to pronounce my name properly, it’s been my name since playschool birth get it right or get a spear through the face!) I’ll scan this for you kay. You have the other one which is ten times worse than this right hahah.

Photobooth at the Drake is better now.

Even though she’s the retarded friend, we accept Lauren Onizz. I like goofy girls. Cos when I do stupid shit they’re the first to nod their heads and go I understand. When we all went to wakestock together do you know how many times we’d leave something on the top of Lauren’s car and then drive away, I win for doing that the most, my purse, a pop, a salad, haha.

I was going to wear a sparkle dress but everyone told me not to so now I will never be able to wear it unless I get hired for a Caesar’s palace housewife shoot. I didn’t want to copy Casie or get stared at all night or make up in my head that I was being stared at all night which is dumb because I live to be stared at.

Me and Kate and Casie knows who she is, her cousin? Raymi stoo-pid forgetful and I don’t listen either. All good things!

Opened the middle one first for ourselves cos it’s least posh, wanted to show off with the cava, which we opened and can’t remember if anyone else saw or cared and then by the third who knows the fuck what was going on HAPPY NEW YEAR DONE RIGHT!

Thank you Kate for hooking us up with the cheapo tix. I’m glad we went out, I can’t party with myself and the tree in the living room and call it a party when I do it everyday.

All the boyfriends fell in love with each other man and we got to hear HEY MAN I LOVE THIS GUY ten thousand times yes you’re welcome we know thank god and we can tell the bromance is blossoming.

Felt a lot of pressure to turn out a hot outfit. Didn’t. I was feeling too much party stressed.

WTF is this beauty and the beast? I want to watch cartoons all day long I wonder if I could turn that in to some sort of job.

It’s hard to get group portraits with everyone but we seemed to have managed to do it, and some of us have zero recollection of this even being taken.

Teach doesn’t remember any of these, where is this he asked? The Drake. Who’s hotel room? Oh some guy with vampire sunglasses on. Lauren and I stole his girlfriend for a cruise of the Sky yard for a bit leaving the boys up to play in the room.

Every hotel room needs stolen balloons.

I think she made it herself?

I was shy at this point so I couldn’t get a picture with the dragons, I went all disney in my head like politely waiting for my turn instead of the hipster cluster mob encircling them. One day I will ride a dragon.

Amazing dress this amazon was wearing. I wore flats so no I am not a midget. I wanted to be able to have control of my feet all night so I kept it safe and Sally Jessie Raphael.

That girl is just asking for a melon squeeze. All girls will be lesbians one day and that will be the time of Raymi!

I’m so special.

Teacher is in a black out here.

And here.

Here too.

I should have known by how we were squabbling and I couldn’t get through to him. Meh. No one was hurt. I was just super fucking annoyed. I need to lighten up and worry about myself more, new resolution is I am going to stop caring about everyone around me (impossible). Also, Teacher’s iphone is broken, won’t turn on, probably happened in his black out probably rested it in a pile of water at the drake maybe. Poor baby.

Lauren O has the longest fingers here. We should buy her an award. A finger.

Should have worn my white fur jacket with the bow but again I was in the mood for casual. Not that I am competitive or anything.

Dim Sum party was fun, we got the VIPLEASE treatment from the Mansion boys and our boyfriends had to stay on the other side of the rope for awhile hahaha. Thanks be to blog and know your place. Mansion (Conrad?) was like those three blonds let them in, no wristbands necessary, remember this face. So self-entitled. Earned.

We are good at taking selfie pics but when there is three of us too many arms in the way and shadows. Need to hire more blog slaves.

A lot of these are Lauren’s cos she was the most operating functioning sober person and dragons were dancing around us aaaaah.

Two people in there? Or one guy with really long arms or sticks I dunno.

Bottle and cans of beer service in our area, we brought the dudes drinks and then when all the vultures were let in the booze was drank. People dancing on tables and all talking nonsense and getting along, very nice. I am not afraid of Toronto anymore, well I never was but you know, people don’t go out to clubs cos they’re insecure or nervous, you just gotta do it and see that the majority is out to have fun and hug and scream in to stranger’s faces I LOVE YOU MANS. Being around young people helps keep you look and dressing young, oh I see this is what they’re doing, short skirts? Groovy.

My nose is so big it captured all of the red light. Lauren’s outfit was awesome. I was almost going to wear my new black corset too but I chickened out.

I dressed up to go to the supermarket, it’s all about the face though I feel and everyone said I looked pretty and that’s all that counts. This dress of hers is very Michelle Pfeiffer in Scarface. Bony cat. C’ept she has bigger bewbs. Score.

Wheee. First time seeing what the Drake hotel rooms look like. You get extra permission to trainwreck through the building with a hotel key.

We met this girl’s friend who was a bit wasted downstairs and hung out by the fire, bumped into Carly’s sister Kristin and everything was running smoothly on the sky yard typical drake shenans.

I made a new friend. He bought me a drink and said I do not buy drinks for women who aren’t going to fuck me but for you I will make an exception because I had made such an impression. I think I weaselled a shot out of him for Lauren I can’t remember. I don’t know his name he was nice but there are a lot of man cougar rocker eccentric types at the drake for you single cats out there.

We were so close to making it out of there with our blankets, Lauren made it out further didn’t try very hard to obscure them, the security guy was like I’m gonna need my blankets back and I gave puppy dog, no, puss in boots eyes and it ALMOST worked.

On our way back to Santa’s village.

Sparkle stars everywhere.

I figured a way to beat the competition.

Why do I pose like I’m on a soap opera? Gaydorable and the restless. Lauren always looks good and Lauren does too lol.

Back to more stupidity another time. Did you guys lose your minds that I didn’t blog yesterday? Don’t answer all at once now. We ended up at our place and I came downstairs with a boulder-sized bundle of tickle trunk costumes and dresses and we had a drag queen party and took 400 mystery blackmail camera photos I will have to see what I can and can’t post, if it were up to me, EVERYTHANG. Will have to ask Casie and Sarah what they feel comfortable being exploited with and how far, the dudes I could care less what their feelings are. GIRLS RULE LE BLOG.Sarahwho we all have a crush on now btw, has been reading my blog for years and knows everything about me, super specific shit I have long forgotten, it was mind-blowing to be blown by her infinite Raymi wisdom one day there’ll be a quiz game on Raymi the Minx to test the knowledge and memory of all Little Raymis out there, questions like WHAT YEAR DID RAYMI FIRST TRY PSYCHEDELIC MUSHROOMS? How many boyfriends has Raymi had? When did Raymi’s mother start commenting on rtm.com, What is Raymi’s middle name? (It’s Krista).

Now if you’ll excuse me I have to get back to my burger king stacker I hope it goes right to my tits.

Happy New Year. Payce!

Tell me what you did last night I mean two nights ago we missed a day over here haha.

(Casie I need your pics)(Still from both times haha).