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no longer waiting for life to happen to me

it’s funny feeling like a cartoon character. to see yourself evolve the way others are wrongly interpreting it. i certainly don’t feel like i am blowing up. i just so totally have my OWN shit going on right now therefore lumping me in with others who also have their own stuff, pisses me off. i certainly personify the one man wolf pack bit, but i also definitely see the advantage of not alienating one’s self. if you act like king shit people will only remember the shit part. you aren’t above anything, don’t try for a second to come across as if you are. you don’t have the balls to come over and say hello to people you know, who wouldn’t dream of the snub-or-be-snubbed dead horse you so boringly beat. quite rich pretending to give a shit about some notorious mean woman yet spent the entire time tweeting like a hero about chicks not wearing black.

i do not give a FUCK about social media. i have friends who do. my friends are connected. i am connected. i am a name. invite me to your thing if i like it i’ll go. oh dress me? lovely sure total blogortunity i’ll capitalize on that one sure and last i checked i wasn’t allergic to fun. i scratch their back, they scratch mine.

this is so boring and doesn’t even deserve airspace. it’s a lot easier pretending to be friends cos the gossip-mongering and catty, petty, behind-the-scenes bullshit is seriously exhausting. we all float in the same-ish circles, we all cruise each other’s blogs, it’s really a downer seeing your fucking faces around town with your scowls and BB quick-draw firing, so lame. if you’re so above it why are you writing about it? why do prom dresses you weren’t included in wearing make you so irritable? oh gross look at us, so lame, having fun, drinking during the day WEARING THAT.

why can’t i go to an event then go home case closed? thanks twitter you fucking retard hahaha.

if everyone’s such a fashion renegade risk taking stud why they gotta show their true hypocritical colours like that? your lives are devoted to fashion, then “a happening” happens and you get all stuck-up about it. hilarious. you should try stand-up.

here’s another WOAH NOW! for you. i don’t even identify myself as a blogger (i consider myself an unemployed rock ‘n roller actually). i am a diarist. a compulsive documenter. i’m a lifer. this is my life, i’m showing it. what’s the big deal all the time??

they wanted a stir, they got a stir and guess who helped? YOU did. so really, thanks for helping get the job done.

goodnite! boring!

ps. i felt like i blogged too much today and about nothing important but then i thought who cares, really, it’s freeing when you honest to goodness stop caring and start living for yourself. enjoying what you enjoy, enjoying it while enjoying it. it’s indulgent (the good kind) and i don’t know why everyone else isn’t doing it already. i feel like i’ve been asleep a really fucking long time and now i’m making up for it.

i am no longer waiting for life to happen to me. to be happy. whenever that happens. i make my life happen. waiting for something to go right to feel right. fuck that, it’s here and now. stop being so bitter in the face and trying so hard to achieve and get ahead. just let the cards fall where they may. if it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t happen. just do something else. this is my personal approach for “making it” right now. no approach. just showing up should be good enough.

28 thoughts on “no longer waiting for life to happen to me

  1. Hey Raymi,

    Long time reader and passionate consumer of the minutiae of the Raymi experience. I think diarist is a much better descriptor than just a blogger. The appeal of your blog on me is the “patchwork quilt”quilt effect, it’s not just glossy pictures of yummy food, dancing you tube pictures, hipster outfits,celeb tidbits, amazing monologues and cutting diatribes, the point is that all of those threads put together the fabric which is your talent and dedication to capture and faithfully document the small, mundane yet insightful details alongside the fabulous, over-arching and inspirational content as well. Truth be told, I came to this hammering insight reading one of your press articles, who also suggested the opinion that you are a brilliant and meticulous documentarian of the times.

    After coming to my above conclusion, it really made the whole blog make infinite sense and I had an increased gratitude, because sometimes I think no one else could be arsed to do what you do, for as long as you have and for the same reasons why. If only people got that more, there would be no haters, because it is what it is – a time capsule of our lives, culture and one person’s expression of an experience. Note I do not think the blog is a total encapsulation of YOU and your life. You are more honest than most, but the clever readers know that cerebral thinkers such as yourself, give a lot more to the thoughts and also have plenty of privates ones left over.

    I’ve read for years, from Tony p, and we have cross linked and such. Apart from respecting your role in the whole “blog” movement and surge to mainstream culture, I have been wary about how this blog has metamorphed into a more accessible and “gasp” commercially viable blog. An old reader roots for you big time, if anyone deserves whatever they dream for – it is you. You have had 15 minutes, and I am glad that you write now of resting easy with this and seeing where the cards fall now. The blog looks great, by the way – the best it ever has. The ad quotent is just right, you wouldn’t want much more. Please keep the comments, as one reader also very astutely commented, if anything it gives you more content, and let’s the blog feed upon itself. The haters are part of the Raymi experience too, for they make you less mainstream and more underdog.
    We don’t like Heidi and Spencer remakes any more than the original. Just don’t waste too much energy and space on the blog concerning them, because they don’t deserve to take that space away from you, your story and most important, at the end the day, the loyal readers and new readers that come to see the Raymi Experience, whatever it may be, today.

    Love always

    “is she happy doing what she does and captures it, or does the blog steer the choices, the image and the raymi brand?”

  2. ooops, that end part was going to be in the second paragraph, as this is what I wanted to ask, before reading the press articles. Can you delete it, or if you wanted to – you could answer it but I don’t think you need to, as your post answered this for me xxx

  3. Hey Raymi, I think you may have turned a corner. Freeing yourself from the riguers of socialite status. You have so much more to offer than that. Save that crap for the unhappy hipsters who don’t have half you resume. In my first public blog entitled “Shits and Giggles” I wrote:

    “I need something to find. Having a goal isn’t what I mean here. It’s not a start/end proposition. I can’t just be content to live life. That is no longer an option. I need meaning, a justification other than a mortgage or Desperate Housewives, or The Drake Hotel.” –

    I think you are finding new depths to your path. Watching you delve into those nuances will be edifying. You are, more than anything else, a fun person to be around. Media marketing mavens might make fun fodder for future blogs.

  4. i don’t understand social media, what the hell is it and how it benefits little guys besides reminding me that i am just a little guy facing that world on the outside. as a reader i have to just fucking say it: reading real blogs about real people doing everyday shit actually speaks more to me than social media-ing.

  5. Oooooooooh! Sing it sister. I concur. Probably cuz I am an IFSP and a hippie that was wasn’t born when Woodstock happened. Yeah I know, what?

  6. i am no longer waiting for life to happen to me. to be happy. whenever that happens. i make my life happen. waiting for something to go right to feel right. fuck that, it’s here and now. stop being so bitter in the face and trying so hard to achieve and get ahead. just let the cards fall where they may. if it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t happen. just do something else. this is my personal approach for “making it” right now. no approach. just showing up should be good enough.

    Thank you. I needed to hear that today….just a couple of words can really help change someone for the better…so…thank you

  7. I just have to say I agree wholeheartedly with pretty much every point of heroine/girl and was going to write something along the same lines, although not as eloquently ;-)

    People are only shortening THEIR lives being hung up on things you do in real life and what you choose to include on your blog.

    Keep on doing what you’re doing as long as you enjoy it. People well love what you have to share and your talent and thoughtfulness run deep. I always enjoy reading your blog and tell lots of people about it.

    Keep on keepin’ on.

  8. I don’t know what the rest of it was all about, really, since I’m not a part of it, but that last paragraph was an epiphany. It was really good for me to read that today. Thanks.

  9. Generally a fan of your work, so I feel like this is a sign of big things to come for you and your readers.

    On an unrelated note, my ex-housemate and I used to call ourselves unemployed jazz musicians back in the day, based on the premise that we were not, at that moment, employed as jazz musicians.

  10. I come for the spaz attacks. And why did that bitch Casie cut your head out of the pic on her Blog? You need to take her out.

  11. Aww man she’s fading out … pretty soon not of this earth, pretty sure out of this world … on a schwing cycle, lookout!

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