ikea salmon sandwich, impossible to eat, just mitted the salmon and globbed some philly cream cheese on top and stuffed it in my mouth in like four seconds, how delicate i am.
fil has a big one for the meatball special.
dropped in at lens factory to have a peekeroonie as one of the photogs fil is exhibiting with on wednesday has some stuff up here. mental note get to grapefruit moon next week stop dragging heels paint more shit ugh ughhh.
went with annoying hipster pajama print, feh. v close to getting this one. of course we forgot to bring the stupid shower rings that don’t fit our rod to return.
so lucky to snag this copy. pumped.
ok i’m going to wrastle the duvet cover on to the duvet now, vote for nana please!
oh and i bought you a present cos i know you’re lonely and nappy.
i really like this one though the white worries me but if that part is kept at the side fil sleeps on we’re good and someone just said it looks like cum, great, arty cum for one and all.
i showed this one to fil as a joke and he likes it a lot, ugh, mature much? i like it too but i think the novelty will wear off ridiculously quick.
this one is a cheapo, which makes me suspicious, also, too much white, i’m just concerned about stains showing. i really do want a big white duvet cover like meg ryan in you’ve got mail, ahhh, but seriously, not practical at all.
these stripes make me feel dizzy so i dunno, this one isn’t at the top of my list.
i like this print, it’s classical whimsy moves me but i dunno, too much red in the room might make me cuckoo.
kinda blah, but good blah i think, like a copy of the three little bears from the 80s drawn with water colours blah.
this one screams I’M A YUPPIE WITH PERSONALITY AND DEPTH FUCKING VALIDATE ME BLAAAAAGH! it reminds me of the santa clause, tim allen’s bed spread, even though it was black, there’s just something cold about this, i don’t like its intentions. hahaha fuck can i read your colours too?
i love this one a lot but it is the most expensive of the lot, 99 boners, it makes me feel like we are on a tropical holiday forever. i bet it has the best thread count too.
this one looks like pajamas to me, and hipsters, i like it, and yet i am irritated by it at the same time. haha.
this KILLS my eyeballs its vibrancy does not even register properly in the photo so i can only imagine how intense it is in person.
ok so those are the choices, good luck with your guessing and yes don’t forget to do that thing again thank you saturday buddies i will always be here for you.
so a coupla skids came by to party last nite and i finally got to meet the mother of all of ‘em, my bipolar bro-in-arms from tbay, r/r and it’s his first time to toronto and he loves it, so all that toronto haterade the rest of the country drinks, put it down ’til you ACTUALLY visit. what else, yeah we were trying to figure out exactly how long he’s been bugging me on the internet for, between 4-5 years it’s been. funny.
before they came i made an unphotogenic salad, it was delicious, i threw in my left over steak to surprise fil the carnivore. i mixed sriracha and my new carrot ginger dressing with feta tomato and spinach. easy peasy fucking sleazy.
positively repulsive looking much?
and i am very proud of myself for tracking down these babies to match the other blue glasses fil has, i like wine in squat tumblers, sometimes i just can’t deal with stems like i get it WINE i am DRINKING YOU get over yourself. featured in this glass though is a heartburnarita, we’ve had left over mix for awhile and magically stumbled upon a bottle of tequila ps. natalie what are you doing tonite?
what’s up bromance? ryan how’d they let you off the reservation? oh god people i could not quit it with the native jokes SORRY sorry. (not sorry)(sort of sorry). i was nervous ok leave me alone.
i was insecure about how much fun they were having, they’re both on vacation-mode so totally zen whereas i’m still at well, whatever i always am which is a combo of insecure loud quiet moody and drunk. fil has been fiendishly working on photos for his show next wednesday at the steamwhistle, y’all should come. anyway this game (thank you gill!) is fun, it’s like balderdash but way easier and kinda tense, we had to stop playing with certain cards cos steph and i were getting too loud and on edge and competitive.
hey how’d they know you’d be reading my blog today?!
whatever cid.
pretentious.
remind me to tell you about the toilet paper experiment fil is currently conducting on me.
this is how i feel about it and what the fuck is on tv??
ok it’s showtime guys!
gettin’ annoyed at being the timer guy.
check the ghetto desperation snacks, jalapeno jelly and teeny wispy crackers.
WE ARE IN LOVE TOO YOU GUISE!
ok business time, i did my share now it’s time for your bit. it would totally warm the cockles of my heart if you could just find the time to CLICK THIS VERY LINK RIGHT HERE and vote for raymi. thank you thank you no, thank you.
hello vodka jug we killed last nite, a good run if i do say so myself.
sigh christmas tree death you wouldn’t understand cos your heart is made of coal.
took a ton of pictures of it to get whatever point i thought i had across.
of course, but of course, someone with a camera in the annex taking pictures of trash.
you are so beautiful.
courtney love called she wants her album art back.
relax jeez. i kid i kid v vibrant punchy photos stretched on canvas well done.
kilgour’s wings are way underrated, so smokey juicy and BIG. we thought that dude bottom right half covered from my plate was fil’s elder cousin, it isn’t and holy fucking habs fan central much, way weird watching the game from that side of the fence. pitt you need to start drinking again and join us there sometime.
there was also more of a mayo-based one i will probably get, so expensive though no wonder they give you the tiniest dollop on your teeny salad. my hair is half curled half dried from its winter excursion.
ok do you get it yet.
re-meet troy and some organic gift wrap.
god talk about laz-E i haven’t even painted in that cat’s shirt, when i’m buzzed i look up at it and think hell yeh that’s a fine white shirt you have on. i have intended to paint it a green/grey or blue for fucking ever now. the betty/veronica went to jen. fil likes looking at it.
a forgotten christmas gift fil left in the drawer that i already had snooped. do you know how many nitemare before xmas dvd hint bombs i dropped!?!?!?!?
how nice of natalie to include just the special features in my influenza care package.
fil’s new monitor. he is slowly building an entire cave to keep me out. what’s next, a tent?
dude can i have some fucking room please? i mean JESUS. i couldn’t even fit all of him in the shot he just goes for miles and miles. anyway hello, good morning, TFIF! (thank fuck it’s friday) not that it makes a lick of difference ’round here nahmean? coffeetime wheee!
I took a long look at your blog last night. One of the most interesting things to me is that you look much different now than you did even a month ago. You look a lot younger, even radiant. Whatever you’re doing with diet, exercise, love, etc., it’s working. I was like, “damn, Raymi went from 25 year old hipster party-face to glowing, youthful sex-kitten in like a minute.” There’s also a twinkle in your eye that wasn’t there before. You look more grounded and confident. Maybe your health is helping you to feel more sane. I know that when I started getting healthier in body, my mind followed suit…somewhat. But the funny thing is that I had a crazy panic attack when I was reading your blog, but that’s probably because I was high and realized that the earth would implode with all kinds of ironic energy if we ever met. Congratulations. I literally had an intense physical/mental reaction to experiencing your blog.
Have a splendid day.
Vane$$a
the only thing that’s changed in my face is that i am using a different camera, the one before washed my face out and made me look terrible, so really i wasn’t all that rotten-faced before, twas the camera’s unforgiving fault not mine oh and im wearing a shade of makeup thats too orange/dark right now, they didn’t have my shade bla blah thanks though
funny re: anxiety, i get it every time i load/leave a comment on scarnage i don’t know why i bother i get carved to pieces there, even a death threat which gave me the wickedest panic attack of my life ugh
i was worried you were going to be mean to me or something and i was too hung to deal with it and your email was a nice happy surprise so thank you, i too had a panic attack this morning though it was booze related, that’s the one thing left in my life to conquer
what’s your gig i want to see what you look like, no fair etc
I don’t know that I was going to be mean to you. Maybe for the sake of entertainment, but not literally. It’s all a big joke. I thought about completely objectifying you in a real sexist way, waxing pseudo-erotic/poetic about your body and how you remind me of Anna Akhmatova, but then I read your blog and decided to just say hello. But yeah, it’s a rough crowd over there, but I bet most of the posters at SC are real sweet when you meet them in person.
I get most of my panic attacks when I’m driving on busy highways or standing in line at a store. It can get a bit dangerous when you’re behind the wheel on an expressway. To say the least, I don’t do much driving anymore. One of my theories about panic attacks is that they’re what happens to sane intelligent people who are freaking out about living in a world dominated by complete morons. It’s pretty scary, right? Most of us probably have at least one if not many deep traumas in our past with some everyday retard. It makes perfect sense that we have panic attacks.
I never thought that you looked “rotten-faced.” That’s quite the trick though, looking better when you get a camera that produces clearer pictures. Most people look worse when we can see their faces better. And you do remind me of Anna Akhmatova, but with a much smaller nose. Your face is real distinct and intelligent yet classic and abstract. A true beauty.
So, you want to put a face to my persona? Sorry, but if I had a dime for every request I’ve had along those lines…I’m not hiding anything, just paranoid and not ready to give it up to people who I don’t know. Trust doesn’t come real easy for me, especially since I have a few enemies in cyberspace who I know would go to devious lengths to find out who I am. I admire your openness a lot, but I just can’t go there right now. Here’s a hint, I’m very European looking. haha. Does that help? If we become friends I’ll eventually let you look at my flickr account or something. And no, I’m not hitting on you. I just think you’re interesting. Another thing we have in common is that we’re both attached to infinitely pretty people. It can be rather hard on the ego. See ya.
embarrassingly i had to wiki anna akhmatova, thank you
i wish i focused more on writing rather than my looks, i feel time is running out and i know how i look plays a big role in this stupid blog culture game, i wonder how long i can do this for and think there are so many younger twinks coming onto the scene but then tell myself to shut up and maybe play it from a rock angle, sort of, not to care as much
understand completely as to wanting to remain faceless i have a few friends on the internet/real life who refuse to have photos of their faces shown but yeah, that’s what trust is for, so as rash as it is for me to go yeah you can trust me, just saying that i can actually be trusted and i do keep secrets and i’m in the same boat too, is all, i have enough pieces of shit stalking loons on my plate for entertainment
ok how old are you then
I had no idea that you’re a celebreblogger and former Vice intern. It’s like you went to college at Irony University. I finally put it all together yesterday. Nice post today, but you’re so harsh on the male of the species. When you were talking about the Japan guy I pictured you with a knife in your hand, going for his balls. Pretty scary.
Mid-thirties. You know I’m a dude, right? Maybe you didn’t know that? No, of course you did. Vane$$a started as one of those innocent jokes that goes too far and then you can’t stop.
I’m viciously hung over today. Are you a French alcoholic too (my mother’s a DuTois, father’s a LeRoux but neither of those are my last name)? I’m afraid that I’m starting to get booze-face like your cousin got when he moved back to Lowell. Not sure what to do about it. When I was a kid, my parents had that wine bottle coaster that says, “un jour sans vin est comme un jour sans soleil.” It should be more like, “a social event without whiskey is a social event with many panic attacks.” brrrrrump-bum. I slay myself.
Hope you’re having a fabulous Lauren kind of day. Much peace to you and yours.
no i did not know you were a dude no wonder ha
im v gullible and lazy
ive been online exchanging correspondence with loons for far too long i have no extra capacity/energy to go rootin around for bg info so i pretty much just take it as is until they get sketchy on me then it’s like whoops shoulda been more careful with that one
the drug dealer thing i wrote that went on up carnage i never should have linked it from my blog, it gave voice for all these turds i had long ago banned and was really bad timing all around
i have some far out there psychos i don’t even know where to begin to start
the only thing i’ve learned from all this is that i think people are kinda done with hearin’ it like it is ie. the vice way and that’s how i created my online persona and it really worked for awhile there
so now i’m trying to go half-soft half-prick
i don’t hate dudes i just hate arrogant fucks who advertise their intentions like that, i just think that poor woman
plus i have been wronged before and i don’t think i can let it go
why am i writing you this
Everyone at SC and Vice always mentions the gender thing and Vane$$a. To be more specific, they give me a lot of shit about it. They treat me like I’m this immensely confused guy, sitting at his computer in drag, saving up for that sex change op. It would be pretty funny if they ever met me in person, especially since i could probably kick all their asses with one hand. I wrongly assumed that you had come across it some time during the last 3 years, but I got suspicious when it didn’t come up. My fault.
I don’t think you hate men. As you said, you’ve been wronged. That’s obvious. It’s also pretty evident that you really love Phil and your life as it is. It amazes me that men read your blog and that somehow that doesn’t sink into their soft little brains.
You’re gullible? I know how that is. I actually believed you when you said that you exploit men for money. I honestly thought that you were a hooker with a heart of gold or something along those lines. Your gullibility makes me laugh when I think about you among the vampires in NY and LA. It brought back memories of my life in Chicago. I can only imagine the stories.
Half soft, half prick? Hilarious. People will never get tired of hearing it the way it is. Instead, they’ll always love hearing people with a talent for telling it like it is tell it like it is. They’re becoming more discriminatory after years of the internet and dealing with the opinions of people who can’t write and don’t really have opinions worth hearing. The half and half thing works for you. You’re evolving.
Haha. Yes, why are you writing me? I’m just a harmless thing who writes all day and chooses unsuspecting people to briefly inflict myself upon when I need some interaction. Sometimes it develops into real friends, usually it doesn’t. In real life, I’m exceptionally asocial. No need to respond to my ramblings. I enjoy telling people what i think of them. It’s not as if this is a fair dialogue anyways. I have tons of info about you, but you know virtually nothing about me. Sounds dull as hell for you.
Hey, before I go can I ask you a business type question? Do you make any money from your blog? If you do, is it what we might call a living wage or is it chump change? I don’t want to pry or anything, so tell me to go fuck myself if necessary.
when did i say i exploited men for money, did i say that? i said i exploit the men who try and show me pics of their disgusting penises, but that’s not for money, that’s for laughing at
i do make money from my blog, i have ads and certain things i plug sneakily, my art sells for a fair amount based on my “celebrity” and i get money from the shitty book i wrote, i have another piece of garbage on the way i haven’t looked at in ages, a bit stressful to think about it, how lazy and spazzy i am
i am also currently working on another project i can’t really discuss yet
it’s tough, canada is tough, i feel like if i was in LA i’d of had a stupid show already, that’s what i keep telling people anyway, or deluding myself into believing
so vane$$a had me going and got under my skin a fair bit good work
This dialogue is a massive fuck that is clustered. You know that? I always associate the word “exploit” with money. When I laugh at someone, I don’t think I’m exploiting them, I just think I’m being realistic. But I see what you’re saying now. I really did think you were a prostitute at first. Isn’t that crazy? The blog seemed like a front for your business with the pics. Like you’re the pastry in the window. I doubt anyone else sees it that way, but I let the imagination go and then it just keeps going plus the exploitation reference. you did say that you exploit men, not for money, but for “material.” I thought you meant material items, not humor material. I was like, “I’m gonna get to the bottom of this. I’ve always wanted to be friends with a Canadian prostitute. I bet she’s real tough on the outside but sensitive on the inside and she’s probably been around the block many times and can relate to all the shit I’ve been through, and she’s probably using her hooker money to pay her way through med school, and on and on…Did you see how they kept fucking with Vane$$a at SC yesterday? Did i ever tell you about the on-line Nazi stalkers that hooked into her? Threatened to “end” her and what not. Scary but I know you can relate. It’s okay. Just as long as they get me and not my love, but I guess she really does love me so they might as well get her too. I’m sure that’s what she’d say. My paranoia raged yesterday. And saying I thought you were a prossy? That’s absolutely a compliment, although I probably know not of what I speak. Ciao.
ok if i was a prostitute then what about phil? haaha man oh man
what went on with vanessa yesterday i try not to look at the sc comments too much they really scare me and make me run for a crap
i had a massive anxiety attack on 911 thanks to a death threat on there i was supposed to host a karaoke party and i i barfed three times in the bathroom at the venue and had to go home it was brutal – thanks internet!
i was an online web girl “model” when i was 19 though, virtual hooking?
phil? ridiculously good looking gay guy that you plant in the blog as a fake bf/psycho deterrent and for real pimp-o-matic bodyguard. virtual hooking? better yet advertising and then you meet up at a swank hotel. yeah, when i found out you’re a celebreblogger i researched you and found your set of pics by the furnace and on the kitchen counter. so saucy. i felt like i had just found out something quite revealing about my baby sis.
at sc yesterday we had things said to vane$$a like “eat shit and die mother fucker” quite a few times. it’s funny at first, but then i need to run for the hills and hate the dark dark world because you can see the psychopath behind the screen. don’t bother looking, it’s real dirtbag shit but a bit funny in retrospect. i’ve been sober for three days. to say the least, i’m doing some overreacting. but still. fucking wankers. vane$$a was in filthy form herself. i remember you telling me about your death threat. sucks that it happened on 9/11 to boot.
i was just laughing my ass off picturing you getting all pissy because yuo’re too lazy to change a few words in our dialogue. good thing you quit the weed.
