yesterday was fun. we ate at colossus. we had the huge booth table and we had to move to another one cos this fucking woman called and requested it cos she needed to breastfeed and then i went to the bathroom and SAW HER BREASTFEEDING IN THERE! her baby was ugly anyway and we got three bottles of wine out of the trade. i saw a very pregnant chick drinking red wine. i almost got my face taken out by the flaming saganaki no biggie. if you’re going to breastfeed in public why do you need a hidden booth that someone was celebrating their birthday at if you’re going to be bold and publicly breastfeed then shouldn’t you just do it anywhere? that woman was a fucking LIAR and only wanted the booth for her nerdy friends. i almost said something to her in the bathroom but her baby started crying. i was so mad i couldn’t even pee.

jesus camp is CRAZY i have ten thousand things to say about it but no time right now have a nice afternoon.

don’t be jeals of me for being at the coronation of elizabeth.

whatevs man that explosion is BORING is what i am thinking

everyone else keep them coming this is funny.

hailey‘s review of MD. she made me look really smart she was basically forced to cos i mailed her a free copy cos she won my copy my blog posts contest that ONLY THREE FUCKING PEOPLE bothered to do.

Marketable Depression by Lauren White

I find this book difficult to comment on, as I feel that I am playing into the stigma of those that she has written about in the last of these 79 pages. I care about what she will think, of what I think, as much as she cares what others think, of her, and her book, and the innermost thoughts she has written therein.

Marketable Depression is charming and heartbreaking, sometimes aggravating, but ultimately sad and uplifting at the same time. The book as a whole is a paradox, much like she who has written it.

I drink for my art I say, because nobody wants to read a book written by a healthy stable boring girl who wears pretty dresses and hangs out at the library

Those who follow Miss Lauren’s blog (Raymi The Minx Dot Blogspot Dot Com) will note this book is as much an insight into the circumstances that have helped shape Raymi into who she is, as it is a validation of the reader’s own experience, hardship, and depression. It is impossible not to identify with Lauren on one level or another.

After all, misery enjoys company, does it not? Regardless of how happy one may be, sadness is mankind’s ultimate common denominator.

We want time to just go away and we use booze to make that happen and what’s great is there’s always another like you at the bar and if you’re lucky that somebody is worse off and then you are allowed to feel relief because that dude has been up shit creek several times and you, well, you’ve only just now rented the boat.

There’s something brilliant about Raymi; Perhaps it’s because her blogs are so full of confidence. Even when she is speaking of experiences at her most self-conscious, one can’t help but be enthralled, entertained, and even a little intimidated.

Marketable Depression, although written in the same manner, strips Raymi away from the girl beneath, revealing her underlying thought processes, exposing Lauren at her most vulnerable.

As I neared the end, I tried unsuccessfully to fathom how it would wrap up. Reaching the last page, soaking up the final sentences, a familiar sensation rose within me. The way you feel after hearing a song with an enchanting string of notes in the last minute; After you’ve watched a movie that leaves you feeling completely satisfied. You want to rewind; You want to hit play again; You want to re-read; to experience that pleasantly full, utterly relaxed, “giant sigh” feeling again.

While Raymitheminx readers may be able to draw more on the author as a whole after reading this book, you needn’t be familiar with Raymi to pick it up and be entertained. You may even take something positive from it.

I certainly did.

ok i am finished stalking augusten burroughs we watched running with scissors last nite. it is good annette benning is amazing. gwyneth paltrow was perfect for her role ANNOYING GOODY GOODY. jeff and craig and isabelle came over last nite craig fell asleep sitting up on the couch. fil and i are going to the burbs for dinner it’s his sister’s bday then we are coming back to maybe go to a party depending how tired we are, we also still have jesus camp to watch. tomorrow we are going to a lacrosse game my first time! jeff showed me some vids last nite of how brutal the fighting is jeez louis. one of my first boyfriends in grade eight was an avid lacrosse player maybe he made the big time and i’ll see him tomorrow? last i saw him he was working in one of those sports stores at the mall he had acne and got fatter, i felt guilty dumping him cos i thought he is so cute he will blossom into this hot babe. i was wrong.

i have this thing that has been growing on my shoulder for over two years now fil just said MAYBE IT IS A BOTFLY WORM. nice. oh another thing i am now paranoid of is getting a brain aneurysm cos this chick in magical thinking gets one waiting for an elevator and died on the spot.

i have to go now we have to get fil’s sister’s present and fil needs a car wash remind me to blog about our CAR WASH FIGHTS they happen every weekend.

oh yeah who gets all your stuff when you die your boyfriend or your parents? fil says parents but i say well the boyfriend lives with you and you spend more time with him. he said don’t worry he will hide some things that my parents never knew existed. think how rich he would get off my art. craig is stupid he said well when you die your stuff isn’t worth as much. um sorry when you die it is basically a goldmine.

me: i woke him up to talk about britney spears and he got mad
haha

sharpachu: hahahaha

me: so when he gets up and is all OMG! over it i will be extremely nonchalant and ignore him

sharpachu: boys just don’t understand

me: i know that would wake me up out of a coma

sharpachu: it’s so nuts

me: sigh
all the bitches are cuckoo

sharpachu: yeah
they are going crazy

hahaha jeff

++++

i have been saying oh man a lot lately and like right now for instance oh man this is the best costume for a kid ever hands down i know i don’t typically feature babies and kids on my blog ever cos i essentially think they are useless mooches but holy how funny is this picture?

hey kid the KKK is thataway –> also i got this from a denmark blog, aren’t people from denmark racist? let me know.

i made these last nite they are WHIMSICAL fil said i had to put more eggs in otherwise it would be a quiche. doesn’t a quiche require cream and fat women’s fingers or something?

fil made this delicious pizza from scratch it is amazing i only had one slice because i am trying not to be the fattest girl in the room anymore. did you know i don’t drink beer anymore? just scotch and vodka and wine and gin but in small amounts. ok nevermind. maybe small amounts in my head. i eat less so i get wasted easier so i drink less. the end.

that’s me and anj from a few halloweens back she is a wicked bass player and singer too we are going to make some music together i have to write songs i hope they don’t turn out like rush again all i know how to write about is lord of the rings and clouds and depression. i’m such an idiot back then i perma-saved all my pictures small so i don’t have the originals of all the good ones. i am smiling like sam crenshaw cos the dude beside me is WAY passed out and i was scared of him cos he is a fucking lunatic.

that’s sam crenshaw (for you americans) he is the detective puppet on today’s special i have referenced him before and will continue to do so in the future as we have the same nose. i would lose my mind if i missed an episode of today’s special and i thought the computer sam used was amazing and intimidating i was sad cos i thought that i would never ever be able to learn how to use a computer. remember muffy mouse? ha muffy. muff.

crazy spears

mental breakdown much? this is how you know a girl is not well, when the hair comes off, i almost did it myself years ago while talking to myself in the backyard and luckily a bug flew by my face while i was figuring out whether i should cut off my beautiful long hair and i took it as “a message” to not do it. spears needs help y’all give it to her NOW!

haha i just woke up fil who is trying to sleep away his hangover and said that i had some very important news for him and sorry i know you are sleeping and all but BRITNEY SPEARS SHAVED OFF ALL HER HAIR IN A TATTOO PARLOR. fil was like?? why are you telling me this now?? FINE he will feel really stupid when he sees the pictures of her.

here is a nice email from a nice girl to distract you from the pain of the fallen celebrities:

I heard your interview in class…

-Monica