my mom’s blog was accidentally deleted after many emails and fone calls of her hysterical devastation we started her a new one please go over there and explain in her comments that it is not the end of the world and her hits will come back and bla bla as i can no longer deal i feel like i have ten ulcers and i want to jump through a fucking window, explain that just cos her url is no longer raymismom.blogspot.com it doesn’t mean she can’t still mooch off what i have created and then explain to her how unprofessional this makes me look she has this thing where when i talk she can’t hear me what’s it called oh yeah selective hearing.

raymi’s mom BLOG

more nyc batch 5?

we went to see miss potter last nite i managed to get fil to see it instead of an explosions movie but i think he secretly really wanted to see it. it is the most beautifully touching darling magical film ever it is certainly going to be a classic i mean it and of course growing up with every single beatrix potter book (me) just makes it all the more sweeter. they portray beatrix potter as being a bit mad, a bit delusional, though when you’re a loner and ridiculously creative and imaginative who wouldn’t be? sigh i could see it again i am sighing because i am in character right now.

there are a lot of funny bits and a few sad ones, you will hate her mother, no matter how big and famous and rich beatrix became the mother seemed to be the only one who didn’t take note of it. f her.

i just told off this chick who buzzed my door 4 times and then banged on it a lot i shut cid in the bathroom and then answered the door in my towel with one also on my head and said CAN YOU NOT SOLICIT IN MY BUILDING AND STOP BUZZING MY DOOR then i slammed the door in her face and locked it loudly. two other people were working our floor and all the old people were out getting swindled over with a toronto star “promotion” – people are not fucking allowed in our building. i have half a mind to call the super right now and rat them out.

if the door is not answered after the second ring then FUCK OFF. she’s all hi would you.. i’m all GRAA ARRR RAAAAAA FAAAAH ARRRRG AHHHH! i also wasn’t wearing any make-up and cos i have bags under my eyes the size of moon pies and they are red and blue and purple i know i looked crazy it’s just as well crazy people do not have subscriptions to newspapers, they have ONE COPY of a newspaper from last summer that they consult for secret messages.

also, don’t try and talk to me when all i eat are left over vodka olives when i only ate two all day long you are pretty much green flagging me to throw lawn chairs into your pool.

this blog from now on is only about spying on my neighbours and my opinions about spying on my neighbours, i hope you like it.

here is a picture of me my mom and nana when i was in my GHOST GOTH SMOKING A LOT OF POT days:

flea market montgomery

i have a new invention idea it probably already exists but is nowhere near mainstream though it should be i am telling you the idea cos i don’t care if you steal it i just want it to come to fruition.

REFLECTIVE TOILET BOWLS.

why because when you are doing a number 2 and right before you black out from all that pushing you take a little sitting there break so the stars fade from your eyes and then you can’t tell if there is a uh ahem *something* attached to yer star-hole so you go to wipe and then SMEAR buuut if the bowl was reflective you could just look and be all oh i have to wiggle this off and THEN i can wipe. messy wiping SUCKS it takes forevs while all your friends are drinking and waiting. sometimes you can look at the reflection of yer ass and groin area if the lighting in the john is decent the water is reflective enough but most times this is not the case and you forget to look anyway BUT if the bowl had an obvious mirror-thing going on it would just be a DUH thing to do.

i’m not trying to be disgusting even though i am i am just trying to help. you know when you are hanging with new peeps and there might be a dude or chick mackin’ on your date but you have to deuce and then you are crapping and wiping forever picturing everyone having fun making out without you? a reflective toilet bowl would rectify that asap. or you could just have magical sensitive ass cheeks that can tell if there is something hanging there.

anyway.

at 6 in the morning some fuck decides to plough the two inches of snow in our visitor lot and then did all the other buildings surrounding our building it sounded like ariplanes flying into my head, the silence of the street bouncing off the plough turning it into WWII REEEAAAAAAAAWOOOOOOOORUUUUUUUHHHHHH over and over and over and over again and again and again if it happens again EVER i am going to leave an anonymous nasty ass letter. i think people can deal with two inches of snow easily a traqctor plough at 6 in the morning is not necessary.

also the dick who yells at his ole lady next door likes to get up at 2am and put shit in the garbage shoot and slams his door again. you are not suppose to use the shoot after 10pm. i want to leave a mean note on hello kitty stationary so that they KNOW it was me who left it. how come old people get to bend the rules? i’m taking back youth, dudes, don’t worry. the ole lady came out of the elevator yesterday and cid was in the hall and flew by her legs and she is so old didn’t even notice like that scene in the professional when the old lady comes out and says why don’t you leave that poor family alone and gary oldman says I SAID GO BACK INSIDE and she nags some more and he shoots the glass window behind her head and she has the slowest reaction to it ever and slowly putters back inside yeah THAT lady is our neighbor and somehow she is still alive.

last nite two chiefs at the horseshoe told me that my utility belt was showing then i said I KNOW THAT’S BECAUSE I AM COOL and then they fainted cos i talked to them. i’ve been rocking fil’s batman shirt all weekend long i might even wear it again today it’s a total babe magnet and by babe i mean awkward simpson’s fan pube ‘stache bomber jacket wearing mawfuckers don’t you forget it.

we met up with aimoo and heather was there too, they had tickets to see priestess and to be a total judgemental snob based on the majority of the peeps at the shoe we decided to not see the band just sort of listen to them from the front then we ditched and went to grossman’s for a full on party that place slays. it’s always free and people are always shitty and dancing even a grandma got up to dance with her walker all around the place PARTY

the dude singing on keys after his set he just slumped over on his amp and snoozed cos he had the spins right there under the spotlight in front of everybody i asked his pals if he was ok and they said oh yeah he’s fine he loves the attention he just had too much scotch.

there was a bunch of white kids dancing like they were at a rave i dunno if this is a new thing but it was uh interesting they may as well of had devil sticks and hacky sacks.

see just takin’ a little break

then right back on it

their band is called the daredevils of soul and they are wicked

this guy was an annoying dick he kept yelling out let me hear your voice BROTHER over and over while dude was trying to explain his song then he leant down in front of him while dude was playing, for a whole minute. holy fuck.

you can see one of the skinny white kids doing the awkward pee pee dance and the chick in the foreground with the purple shirt and red sweater, i think she’s one of the chicks who panhandles out front of the shoe most nites. fil thought so too.

g’nite granny

TIME TO OPEN UP RAYMI’S MAILBAG:

we’ve heard from this guy before, and i have never met him.

email one:

take a swing at me

I miss you ..try to tear me down destroy me make love to me like you rape me wtf your a hottie welcome to earth sorry i’ve been hurt for a while…I could use some real drugs take me down let it burn… faith and hate we’re not perfect…jesus quit reading and fall in love hurry i’m getting older…

email two:

Take my hand… we’re leaving

oops yess drunk again
physical pain…

email three:

broken

I wanted you to know….I miss you your pretty and I will never have you soo sad ..i’ll keep in drunken touch…the worse is over now…..only xtc to cum…heheheheheh broken someday
Jeffg
–
The only antidote to mental suffering is physical pain…

that is all.