i like smiling aLL gay and holding Signs.

in grade one there was this cute chinese boy named Allan who loved me cuz i told him i liked his jogging suit or something equally lame to that compliment. then i hated him cuz he always followed me around. i use to steal his erasers and then rub them down into erase fluff and then leave the eraser fluff on his seat and when he sat on it the eraser fluff stuck to his skinny ass jogging suit pants.

we went to the zoo and ms.smith made me and and allan partners and i just wanted to die and get away frum him. anyhow, at lunchtime allan kept trying to hold my hand and i couldn’t stand the thawt of him so i pushed him really really hard and he fell back over this wooden fence-thing that had like a four foot drop and allan landed on his head in the dirt. i ran over and looked down at him all upside down and in an uncomfortable pretzel and he was crying and i laffed at him.

this woman saw the whole thing and ran to help him and went, “awwwww.” and sorta picked him up and scowled at me and i flipped out, grabbed allan’s arm and screamed,

“Don’t touch him. he’s MY boyfriend!!!!”

and he goes, “I am?!!!!! oh i lurve you. I knew you loved me too!!” when the lady walked away. and i sed, “Ew. gross. NO!”

I was just embarassed that sumwun caught me being a mean bitch.

I was almost killed twice today. once by a van and then the second time by a taxi. i am a superstar. i laFf in the face of death.

in two days it will be VaLentine’s day. grayt. 24 hours just to remind me how pathetically lonely and crazy i am. if i don’t get a valentine (and frum my mum and dad duzn’t count) i am going to be really really angry. and you’ll hear ALL about it!

I learned that the femaLe anaconda snake can have sex with like 7 other snakes at the same time. that makes me jellus. Also wal-mart has robot-like self checkouts now. the wave of the future. I made myself a burnt griLLed cheese samwich tonite for dinner cuz i was waiting for a kall frum newYork. fone ring damn you RING RING REEEEEEEEnG! now i am about to watch Dog Day AfternOOn wif al pacino InniT. that makes me sorta happY. also i know i wiLL get Laid tomorrow. knowing that i am getting laid calms me down. Oh yeh. tomorrow i have therpay with my muther. we don’t know how to comunicate properLy without yelling at eachother. Really if u asked me, i think it’s my brother who needs the therapy. I am bloated fruM drinking all this blue Juice. I went to lava Last Nite.

It is fun to play with old fotos of yerself. doo dee doodeedooDee doo. I drank one too many shots of tequila on fri’nite and then iprojectile vomitted onto the sidewaLk one block frum my house, 3 in the morning. great fun. then i spent two hourS fetaL-like near the toilet. ouch. i hope i have not developed an ulcer. Up until that point it wuz reaL fun. badadadadaBing.

Ok yeh well, this new guy i am sorta ‘seeing’ . uhhm. that’s it. i jus twanted to say that. we pretty much just smoke weed and ffuk. i met him last fri’nite and we’ve ‘hung-out’ thrice since then. I saw’re him last nite. He doesn’t talk to me via email. too bad. that is when i a mat my best. I like computer talk and internet friends. i think i will get shitfaced tonite and go to Offside’s and see a HeLLa people i have not seen since b4 i went to england and no one will recognize me cuz i had long slutty blond hair back then. June. I showed up to classs 15 minutes late, burntout and sporting bedhead. i hate teenagers and skool but i like my teachers and my classes. k bye.

I just realized that i have not brushed my teeth today.