i was totally in love with you and i thought i WAS you and i fantasized about meeting you at my old cottage on the deck by the beach and saying i knew you weren’t really dead you are mine now or something.
and then i was in love with damon albarn from blur.
and then i had my first boyfriend mike who was one year older and i lost my virginty to him on his basement floor and jeopardy was on no joke and when i went home i smelled a weird pungent candy smell for awhile and i didnt really bleed til the second time. we dated for one year and 8 months and i was loyal the whole time.
anyway, before that, in grade six i had a garage sale, saved up the money and bought in utero, incesticide and the nevermind cassettes. wicked cool.
yo your woman is crazy fucked right now huh. shame really.
i was like that in la. crazzy stringy hair ‘n all spurting crap left and right. not literally. wordically. neeahht.
i think i’m going to take a photography course and write more articles and actually get paid for them, clean up my act and get a model portfolio done, sing more, get my license and excercise.
lie down in the park in the middle of my back yard on my back in a red and grey striped sweater and catch rays. blek.
i want to buy a slip ‘n slide.
i’m going to start an illegal lawn-dart gambling competition ring. but first i have to practise like mad. we have these darts from way way back and now they’re outlawed, out of make. thunk through my head.
i wish i could see in the dark. i couldn’t read any of the words on the dryer dials last nite, just when your eyes begin to focus, things decide to get wavy wiggly wobbly so you pretend you know what you’re doing and press n turn everyfuckingthing you can. i walked thru this puddle of water on schrader’s carpet last nite from the leaky fishtank, only 4 times and especially right after i put my brand new dry socks on. i am SO mexican. people would come by and walk right thru it too be cause we forgot to tell them about it. everyone was sitting with their bare feet all over the place. we were suppose to go to le bar but it did’nae happen.
went over to the boy’s and watched the rest of gummo. i coudn’t get over how sensually disgusting the kid is whilst eating that chocolate bar in the dirty bathwater tub. and his mum is obviously a sketchbag but there’s love in her heart for the ugmo lil guy when she lathers up his hair astroboy-like and shakes the suds off her hands right into his spaghetti and milk. i’m not even going to talk about the piece of bacon taped to the tile wall.
This dog walks into a bar. The bartender says “Look, we don’t serve dogs here.” The dog says “I’m waiting for a genie.” A monkey cozies up to the dog and says “For a twenty I’ll give you a night you’ll never forget.”
So the dog yells “All right! Where’s that girl with the loose tooth?”
i screamed like the hurtingest woman ever on drop zone at canada’s wonderland and i got the worst burn on my shoulders and neck and arms and i got mustard on both the prizes we won like immediately. i hate mustard. i got this eyedropper thing, a liquid lunch it is, the flavor of bbq chips. more like bbq saliva-vomit.
sometimes i just want to throw all my clothes out the goddamn window at the old man next door and make secret fart noises and hide so he will go cucko trying to figure out if there is such thing as a garden what farts.
there was a concert and kristi’s mum invited me to it and there were a lot of people milling about when the stage blew up and knocked the band over and they all died people scattered bodies everywhere i thought i knew who dunnit then i get a call later and it’s kristi and she says she did it so i rat her out and she is crying on the fone they take her away and i made her mum cry when i said yeh thanks for inviting me to this concert i had a great time despite your dotter killing everybody and we are now walking in this underground tunnel and there is noxious gas everywhere and our footprints and handprints are smeared on the walls and floors so they know where we are and then we are on the highway and a van pulls up beside us full of flips and one is rena and she has a machinegun and she blasts the fuck out of our car and then i saw my dead grandpa and said oh i’m sorry i’m dreaming.
when i take my crazy pills at nite my dreams are amazing.
