http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102483156/in/photostream/

dying alone, dining alone. bring it on.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101875349/in/photostream/

i’m so melanie griffith in working girl here. all i need are white reeboks and puffy socks.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102469924/in/photostream/

and a lisp.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101876495/in/photostream/

i went to globe bistro last nite to wine dine and 69 myself. how annoying would it be if i said “it’s a living” in that shitty way? what’s the stupid blog movie about cooking? did it flop? my blog movie would be me in restaurants being snarky. snoozefest. actually i bet you could make an epic stoner foodie movie, or eating show for stoners. it doesn’t matter what you see on tv that gets you going cos whatever’s in your kitchen is all you got to work with and i highly doubt you’ve got smoked elk marinating. nice try though.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101876775/in/photostream/

this place is gorgeous and expansive. it actually used to be a bowling alley and has the longest length dining footprint on the danforth. they are winning.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101877041/in/photostream/

they are also awarded most looks like a jellyfish lamp in the city. second place is mitzi’s.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102471448/in/photostream/

reminds me of that scene from the shining when jack nicholson sits at the bar and talks to the imaginary tender. haunted in a good way.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101877781/in/photostream/

more jellyfish theme.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101878353/in/photostream/

i am a sorceress.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101878637/in/photostream/

think global. eat local. see that?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101878911/in/photostream/

i looked up and said wow they have money.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101879395/in/photostream/

upon closer inspection, thick plastic chains. i like that even better. they might be glass but i doubt it. i should have asked, or stood on my table.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102469062/

a delicious surprise amuse bouche of elk tartar. it was amusing. some of its jokes fell flat though. i really enjoy pompous little treats. stick a bunch of warm meat on a potato chip, can’t really muck that up can you?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102473442/in/photostream/

i chose the terrine for my appetizer. it’s like that scene in dirty rotten scoundrels when steve martin orders everything and two beers. i never eat foie gras or other obnoxious shit in the real world so i make up for that, feel guilted, then i choose fish for my main.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102473964/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102474194/in/photostream/

super mature.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101880591/in/photostream/

sparkling rosé.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102474626/in/photostream/

kind of like how i sparkle.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102474938/in/photostream/

i am practicing for my courtney love halloween costume. ugh hair. getting roots did the second i hit publish. came straight from burlington to the restaurant. sorry i have city engagements i have to go eat dinner. what a prat, eh? hahahha righteous.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101881619/in/photostream/

so delicious. massive tease. they sure know what they’re doing with those little amuse bouches. i think it’s amusing because i picture the cook with stacks of dirty pots and mixing bowls and a completely mental cooking vortex all for this tiny little thing. SO much pressure it cannot be a failure. it must be perfect. you get one chance ONE CHANCE only. maybe a little stressful. yeah i know they taste everything and sample it all first but still i like to pretend all that work and effort just for me and my little potato chip and i feel like a giant.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102475700/in/photostream/

the oldest man in the world was sitting over there. when i’m that old i hope to still be flossing it in linen service fashion instead of swiss chalet fashion.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102476000/in/photostream/

foie gras terrine i should stop ordering this. i am trying a no dairy gluten free diet because i am an idiot and always need to be doing something so the choices on the menu for what i could eat were like lard stuffed in lard or gluten everything.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102476742/in/photostream/

was talked into trying one of the stuffed tortellini (Pork Brawn Tortellini – $11.00 – Black radish, radish sprouts, fennel pollen broth, Monteforte Toscano) and then my stomach began to cramp so i think i have an allergy to pasta or whatever that is, melodie was just telling me about it. does it happen that immediately? i’m so used to stomach issues though so who really knows. it was worth it though, delicious cramping.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101883083/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101883259/in/photostream/

food can look grotesque, fascinating, and delicious, all at once. a look is important for sure but nothing beats taste. you can pile up arugula and compote bullshit all you want cheffy but if it tastes crap your modern cuisine design monthly subscription, uh, can’t finish joke.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101883535/in/photostream/

i’ve had a lot of foie gras lately. my warranted expert opinion on the stuff is, well, it’s pretty rich, and if you think about it too much you kind of get sicked out and then you score low on the ethics portion of your eating tour BUT at least the guy was local so i canceled the evil out.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102477642/in/photostream/

so being facetious. no, carbon footprint reduction does not condone animal suffering. BUT, it’s an ancient tradition, this method of cuisine. i should probably research it more before piping up. however, because it’s so cultured and fancy, “rich people do it so it’s ok” justification, i dunno. basically all i’m saying is i like it and i hate that i like it and i hate that i don’t even like it that much but then i go and have it five times in the last couple months like an insane person.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102478190/in/photostream/

that plate is meant to be shared too, you spread it on bread. it was like eating butter, that’s the rich consistency and texture of it, creamy pâté. i did a shooter of it once at another ballin’ restaurant. it was really really gross and really really good at the same time. that concludes my opinion on foie gras. takes bow.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101883977/in/photostream/

and bizarre. that’s where i come in and the reason why i pretty much do anything in life. is it weird? yes. sign me up.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102478704/in/photostream/

like, is it weird that i am dining practically alone all the time, super high end shit and tastemaking trend forecast broadcasting to the world from my soapbox? yes.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101884973/in/photostream/

pork and pear on the house. i died.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101885377/in/photostream/

no don’t do ittttttttt.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102479590/in/photostream/

suffering fool.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102479818/in/photostream/

they heard me hemming and hawing over the beet salad so they made me one. so sweet.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101886379/in/photostream/

i was floored by that syrup. meaty syrup. have your ever had meaty syrup before? ridiculous.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102480744/in/photostream/

so beautiful. i didn’t eat the goat cheese. i am really into beets. what are their beneficial properties? (note to self ask melodie).

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102481660/in/photostream/

this place is massive trust me guy. if it’s photographing this big then you know it. multi-level dining area, so many great vantage points. the front room is darker, cozier if you want that. i wanted better lighting for photos back here.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101887719/in/photostream/

psyche guys i’m actually on a cruise ship!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102482184/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101888277/in/photostream/

how mysterious.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101888727/in/photostream/

up top.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101889265/in/photostream/

hahahaha that’s my napkin on my head.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102483660/in/photostream/

le elk. Second Wind Farms Elk – $29.00 – Seared loin, braised leg, acorn squash, pearl barley, shitakes mushroom, lovage jus lovely lovely.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102483922/in/photostream/

look how cute this is took a bunch of jokey photos pretending to pick it up like a brownie. it is West Coast Sablefish – $29.00 – House chorizo, Cookstown dinosaur kale, organic navy beans, local saffron “mojo” sauce

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101889933/in/photostream/

i look crazy here cos my bun is cut off. i explicitly said this photo needs to be jewier, show. the. bun. GOD. nail polish colour photogs well.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101890135/in/photostream/

amazing. you can tell they have fun plating stuff here. they’re ever good at it. i try plating stuff at home but i don’t really cook anymore so it’s like kashi cereal with just right kellogs sprinkled on top and light soy milk. sigh. the bachelorette.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102484516/in/photostream/

it speaks to me as it looks like lasagna.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101890543/in/photostream/

there we go, jewy to the max. it’s not offensive if it’s something you’re striving for yeah? no? who cares my online personae said it i didn’t.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102485014/in/photostream/

dessert. check the booze desserts. i really wanted the smore dessert. guess what we went with. of course i ordered a booze drink.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102485544/in/photostream/

i love this tree.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102485816/in/photostream/

elk interlude.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102486050/in/photostream/

sigh. ginger chocolate homemade ice cream. two different types of iced ice? it wasn’t gelato. the cookies made in-house too.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102486250/in/photostream/

i can never date any sort of chef. i will never be able to wear skinny jeans ever again if so. that would be a hilarious premise for a cooking show. raymi’s top chef. do it trashy tila tequila styles and have girls up in there too.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102486506/in/photostream/

BUT, i love you! as i axe one off every week.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102486734/in/photostream/

tears streaming down her face as i slurp on her delicious, but not good enough, lobster bisque, pieces of some garnish herb sticking in my teeth. what is this, fennel? shoulda gone with swiss chard.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102486934/in/photostream/

then i say the show’s catch phrase like, you’re fired.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102487210/in/photostream/

i got like, so many ideas man.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5101893055/in/photostream/

spanish coffee sans whip cream. it was delicious. as booze is wont to be.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102487674/in/photostream/

ELKAHOLISM.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102487882/in/photostream/

look my little drink is wearing a little shirt. to the nines.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102488340/in/photostream/

that’s my casual business demeanour. believable? works at cheese boutique. well, some of the time any way.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102488574/in/photostream/

yikes look at that one piece on the left of the right tray all folded over weird like that what happened dude?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5102489352/in/photostream/

i love the danforth. i don’t hang around there enough. going to the danforth is a nice little adventure, something different from whatever dumb thing i was last doing. i’d go to globe again for sure and also earth. thanks for dining with me.

FOOD P0RN STAR OUTTTTTTT.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5099820486/

i’ve been a bit of a mess since i’ve been out here.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5099820734/in/photostream/

i am in a stress vortex.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5099224331/in/photostream/

sitting down in front of my blog is total escapism. likely why i’ve taken to it for so many years. i have been putting life and things and worries on hold for ages now. the higher quotient of blog posts says that there is something i am battling mentally. the lack of blog posts says the same too. usually that i’m depressed and the energy necessary in bumping out fluff posts, i just don’t have. well it’s there but i can’t be bothered to force it. force a smile. i cannot do that. i think people who do are crazy. how can you get through life being a phony like that? i’d rather go to bed at night thinking you’re a cunt instead of a crazy cunt fake smiling like a cheshire.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5099821240/in/photostream/

stress vortex aghhhhhhh if i keep blogging i am safe hahaha.

burlington has made me squirrely it’s time to go back to reality now.

i am so happy that i got fuck all done. well, i did a lot of emailing and business in that regard but nothing concrete. ok no i did begin an article. an article about a story i’ve been retelling often. steph’s eyes bugged out when i got to the part about the shrimp and coffee and the suit. wow.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5099223365/in/photostream/

i am a weirdo. i enjoy weird things. i put myself into weird situations my entire life just to test myself. i think i get off on abuse, torture, minimal discomfort. i cannot believe it’s happening so i see how long i can tolerate it and see who snaps first. like all the shitty dates i go on.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5099822276/in/photostream/

another great thing about blogging is, i really, genuinely, enjoy being alone. as much as i complain about dying alone fat and old, i kinda don’t care? i wigged out yesterday a bit, the emo got me bad, and i thought if i had a boyfriend would that fix how awful i feel right now? no, it wouldn’t, i’d still be miserable, he couldn’t cure that, therefore, a boyfriend is redundant. almost a hindrance. some of these dates i go on the poor saps fall head over heels but i don’t for them and you can see the trainwreck around the bend. you really truly want to be the one for them or give them 24 hours to think it’s gonna happen. but it isn’t. i am so ludicrously picky now i don’t think i will be able to settle. it’s cos i realized my power. it will be the undoing of me in the end. pride can’t hold you in the night.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5099222617/in/photostream/

went out with binsk last nite and we shared our life philosophies. she is awesome. takes awhile but eventually you learn that you don’t need no fucking man. a couple of my girlfriends are going through breakups at the moment. i try to be a bastion of hey look at me all this can be yours too (hahaha) for them. some days i feel like i am barely keeping it together but that’s ok, i’m not a dweller, set it and forget it and move the fuck on. when you breakup with someone it’s for reasons, your logical mind tells you from the getgo that this prick is beneath you slightly, maybe. if he blows it or you blow it it’s cos neither heart was into it so don’t be so sad when it’s over you’re just moving on to the next phase of awesome in your life. don’t get down about the in-between hard bits, they make you stronger for having got through them. enjoy the suffering. suffering makes you feel alive. like watching a scary movie. you’re involved.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5099223653/in/photostream/

everyone has fears. everyone feels inadequate and anxious. once you realize you’re never truly alone in the world then things get easier. yes i enjoy being alone but do i know i’m really alone? five thousand unique people come to hang out here with me every day so i must be doing something right.

ok this is getting squirrely now im revealing shit. one of the guys in deep river was telling me some stuff and he got this look on his face and said uh oh i’m sharing. big whoop. share away.

doesn’t it seem like blogs are dying off or is it just me. i feel like people are packing’er in. meh.

the point of this retarded story is, i am a completely different person now that i am single and thriving. it isn’t always easy but it’s interesting to say the least. my life could easily still be exactly the same as it was a couple years ago, which floors me a little. like that nicholas cage film when he has that entire life he could of had with tea leoni if he stayed in the suburbs instead of the yuppie bachelor dream world that was his reality. which would you choose? do i want to be a professional at relationships or do i want to be a professional at achieving my goals? you can be both but it takes a lot of energy out of you, to work on a relationship, holy shit, intense. you don’t get to live both worlds, single life world and all the ridiculous adventures and flavours. it is also exciting going on dates or just meeting people too you don’t talk to them in a manner that’s kind of passive like, i cannot sleep with this person because i am in a relationship i am speaking to them because they are interesting and it’s my choice to give them my time. people in relationships sometimes don’t make the real world people effort because they know they’re going home to someone. single people are like come on bring it i am out of my house if i don’t engage in social interaction then i’m not getting any later on. it makes you braver, essentially. self assured in a fearless way.

ok to real work now blog whisperer ouuuuutie.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097036659/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097033397/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097034323/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097630178/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097628260/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097630812/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097032453/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097632446/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097033045/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097031901/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097630022/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097036213/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097035579/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097033229/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097032239/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097629870/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097631412/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097631216/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097631012/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097630580/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097631828/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097038641/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097633324/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097037165/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097632980/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097634242/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097038071/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097037875/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097633520/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097635000/

thehundreds.com or terrysdiary.com

not sure if you ever look @ other blogs to get ideas or whatever, but just incase these might be interesting to you.

2 of my fave.

Yeah I know terrys but not the other. I barely look at anything anymore. On total output mode. I am insane.

Do u really work for the star

Yeah, I work in marketing for the Star. It’s not that glorious. No I don’t work with writers if that’s what you’re insinuating. Well sometimes but not in a literary capacity.

Why?

No reason just wondering

I do. Is your blog your income? Or do you work?

You’re definitely a good writer, I see why you have a cult following.

Too bad about the creeper fan though.

this is my job

That’s rad. For real.

A self serving entrepreneur.

Reminds me of fight club.

Yeah im weird.

yeah ive been hacking at it for a long time now i am a fighter
some days are tough but, well, im famous haha. good trade off. i earned my way. self made.

Yeah that’s wicked, never met someone like that before.

Definitely. Self-made no doubt.

‘hustla baby!’

the hustlin never endddddddddddddddddddddds

It shouldn’t fun things don’t!!

I never understood why people do things that make them miserable.

Just don’t get it

some people’s scope is limited

Pity L

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097031697/in/photostream/

Hey! Cool blog- everyone and their toms. Too bad you guys left early.

-Dave from Watusi.

Why what happened once we left? We got in a bar fight after that at not my dog cos we gangster.

Hahaha! Some weird girl came in and liked brentolious. But she then freaked and told us all to fuck off. She then bought shots for us, then snapped. Then left telling us – while looking at me to “go fuck myself”. It was quite a riot

Yer other dave boy was a bit of an annoying not getting it creeper. Maybe it was deserved?

Ahahaha! He’s married so I guess that would explain the hovering tendency, and So what happened at this bar fight? Is it a real bar fight or just blogger fluff (just kidding).

Well I didn’t write about it cos I know the reaction therefore real. I never lie. Ever. Why would I waste my time.

Hence the just kidding. So what happened??!

I have no time to even tell the truth haha. I lipped someone off basically and it got tense

Daaamnn! Well it happens, haha.

we had had enough of men hovering and poking at us

Ahahah oh gawd too funny.

i almost punched a 400lb drunk guy he woulda gone down like a ton of bricks. kind of a really good story actually. for another day.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096906863/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097503192/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097503368/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097503532/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097503734/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096907725/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096907905/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096908161/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097504628/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097504828/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096908787/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097505194/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097505388/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097505560/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097505790/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096909787/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096910003/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096910297/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096910171/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097506640/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097506808/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096910819/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096910993/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097507272/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097507442/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097507596/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097507786/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096911781/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096911967/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097508340/in/photostream/

+++

+++

Hi all,

Ward 14 goes as far north as Dupont, as far south as Lakeshore, as far west as Parkside/Keele, and is bordered to the east by the railway tracks. It includes High Park, Parkdale, the Junction, Roncesvalles, and a little bit of Liberty Village.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096829637/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097306644/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097290690/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097348586/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097438406/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097310014/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097308088/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096842589/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096753033/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096707949/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097425458/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097349558/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096703891/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096829341/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096830011/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097299078/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097438048/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097425826/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097297538/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097295890/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096705981/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096829167/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097293984/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096842223/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097292340/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097288698/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096830343/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097437684/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097287146/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097285382/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097437428/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097283764/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096841669/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5096685361/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5097280342/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094276542/in/photostream/

ready for some raymentertainment?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093694079/

all i wanted sunday morning in deep river was a pot of organic snob coffee. everything in this small town was shut down on sunday or operated under weird hour restriction. in my diva flip out grabbing the most expensive bag i could find i didn’t notice that this wasn’t even coffee. hit the roof. on top of discovering there wasn’t any internet in the house i was staying at. all i wanted (needed) to do was blog and then the real book writing work would begin on the monday, sunday was supposed to be my self-indulgent day. it started off on the wrong foot.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094293628/in/photostream/

i took a stubborn stand and declared that i don’t even eat in the day but then relented and sat at this diner. i was pissed off because it was beginning to dawn on me the state of the situation i was in.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094293362/in/photostream/

this was adorable though.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093693393/in/photostream/

my coffee. i barely had any of it after that huge stink. i see no point in sitting over a diner cup of coffee when i should (and want to) be sitting in front of my laptop. i can’t leave with the pot of coffee nor can i order one. the logic here frustrated me immensely as well as being woken up way too fucking early after a long car ride and late night.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094292940/in/photostream/

i turned to my guest/host and declared don’t ever fucking wake me up again at 8 in the morning on a sunday. no excuses. my bitchiness will all make sense once you hear the full story that i’m writing for street carnage presently.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094292502/in/photostream/

went to one of the (two)(or three) bars in town for some entertainment. there was a wedding reception in the other part of the room. they didn’t want us over there but we eventually invited ourselves anyway and then no one cared.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093692475/in/photostream/

it was kind of fascinating being privy to a family’s private celebration in this small town with no irony to any of it. when i lived in maine at this bar i was chatting up a girl and kept asking her what her plans were, when would she leave rockland? she was confused by that because she never planned to leave her town. i was eighteen and refused to believe any of this.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093691809/in/photostream/

this girl is the same age as me, 27, has three kids. a family. urban women at 27 with three children? unheard of. who looks older? i’d say i do but only because i have a fashion angle, if we were wearing the same outfit perhaps and could deduce nothing about either one of us that would be the true age determination.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094291384/in/photostream/

that’s the shirt my mom also picked up in the store that i had in my dressing room and i laughed when i saw it in her hand. you know those freak stories when twins are separated at birth then find each other several decades later and they’re wearing the same pants or like the same music?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094291116/in/photostream/

everyone was staring at me like my hair was on fire. have you ever eaten and felt so on display before? i wonder how famous people deal. you’re supposed to act aloof and not take notice but a real person would be like can i fucking help you?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093691097/in/photostream/

i am fully exhausted here but the new surroundings high got me. people always push themselves when traveling that’s why you always need a vacation from your vacation.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094290632/in/photostream/

the food at this hotel/resto was really good. i was surprised.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093690611/in/photostream/

the decor was lacking but whatever it’s deep river.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094289828/in/photostream/

we had a reservation which was totally unnecessary. i was certainly dragged around town like a fucking show pony. half into it half alright already that’s enough.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094289604/in/photostream/

i meet enough people in the fucking city why do i “need” to make a connection with some woman who apparently writes for something i can’t even remember what it is. i do not react favourably to being told what to do or what is good for me or my brand. i was being walked across the road to a woman in her garden oh i must meet her so i’m in my sunday fog halfway to her place and then i snapped. no, stop making me do shit i don’t want to do! i turned around and marched back to the house.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094289292/in/photostream/

i’m here to write not to socialize with 50 year old well educated spinsters.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094288662/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093688669/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093688417/in/photostream/

halfway point and first piss break aaaaaahhhhhh.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093688205/in/photostream/

i spent $30 at whole foods before we left oakville and have like nothing to show for it other than a german toothbrush. that scene is ridiculous. it is perfect for the self important elite crowd of oakville and on a saturday you can forget not being pissed off after wallking around that place. i am always half amused even when i’m pissed off making mental notes to write about it later.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094287782/in/photostream/

i bought gum and cough drops too and an americano and two chocolate bars but does that and these items add up to thirty dollars in your brain? not really. it shouldn’t.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094287498/in/photostream/

my lunch.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094287254/in/photostream/

being british justifies anything you want in life. like, drinking at noon. also when other people decide to share wine before you make a booze move one by one everyone caves like dominoes.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094287034/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093687085/in/photostream/

my shirt is pretty see-through hey. yowzers.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093686835/in/photostream/

one of the only family shots with me in it and it’s blurry. haha.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093686603/in/photostream/

dad you look like a baller.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093686335/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093686073/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093685531/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093685299/in/photostream/

i look like jiminy cricket.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094284942/in/photostream/

st. jude’s is a lovely church.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094284676/in/photostream/

we had a little memorial service for my grandparents. five rose bushes dedicated to them in this plot. next year they will be full in bloom.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094284464/in/photostream/

i love oakville. i can’t wait to be rich enough to own a house here.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093684333/in/photostream/

classic funeral scene. of course it rained. was raining.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093684115/in/photostream/

if that was my brother it would be excruciatingly hard to resist the urge to nudge him with my foot into the dirt. then i’d run like hell.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093683711/in/photostream/

they founded the scottish dancing club in oakville. my grandfather was welsh, grandma, scottish. very social people.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094283410/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094283164/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093683035/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094282734/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094282298/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094282044/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094281584/in/photostream/

this is what $80 looks like in the form of a truffle from cheese boutique. i am spoiled.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093681425/in/photostream/

flickr made a mes of my photo order i can’t be bothered to organize them. welcome to my life and what my brain feels like, all these experiences overly-documented and memories of events all squashed together one after the other. in a life where you are constantly doing, with little time to reflect it can get a bit overwhelming. i don’t know what my brother is trying to communicate here other than he was half in the bag when i showed up and i am the family punching bag. well, i’m the family weirdo. as a reader of my blog can you imagine being related to me and like, “allowed” to make fun of me whenever you want? don’t think you wouldn’t get it back ten-fold though.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093681171/in/photostream/

me steph and melodie make it to mezzrow’s totally annihilated to meet up with lucas. what an evening that was.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093680893/in/photostream/

i made a joke to our cab driver about this canadian flag gum i wish i could remember what it was i know i took this picture to remind myself to repeat it here. too much time has passed since the telling of this alleged epic quip so i leave you with nothing but more mystery. i probably went seinfeld on him or asked if he secretly worked for the tourism board of canada. only funny if you are ten sheets to the wind i imagine.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093680517/in/photostream/

this guy rode his bike backwards by us in the market i call him over and wouldn’t you know it he’s got hash. i’m bumping into lots of people with hash lately but they never give your their hash source they just tell you it’s expensive and when you’re all yeah i know i don’t care i love the shit they’re still all selfish about it. makes no sense.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094280112/in/photostream/

nice bike.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094279784/in/photostream/

so his claim to fame is cycling backwards like as fast as one would bike forwards. he’s pretty good but i don’t think it’s very safe or practical. we were all in snarking on the universe mode and he played right into that.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093679663/in/photostream/

there was another tailgate party afoot here that we just joined (a few yards away) for less heat to smoke some pot by and then they went away. we thought it really funny and selfish of us to ruin their good time idea they had first.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094279190/in/photostream/

yup hi family time there we are again.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093679115/in/photostream/

had a drink at ronnie’s which is when the nite turned you can see it in other photos of mine there’s no chance in hell of me posting hahaha. see how my curls fell out? my hair gave’r.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094278442/in/photostream/

exactly.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094278030/in/photostream/

anna’s door (missing glass) inspired me to do a fake break in photoshoot.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094277804/in/photostream/

i was semi (nervous) aware that maybe there was leftover shards of glass. there wasn’t.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093677335/in/photostream/

i can’t believe i got my roots done this day they are already growing out like crazy or i’m just that neurotic about it.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094276780/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093676341/in/photostream/

i warned them to be on good behaviour then turns out i’m the one who shoulda heeded that advice hahaha.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094276092/in/photostream/

this tequila is so good and smokey.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093675885/in/photostream/

rented a movie earlier in the evening when we thought we’d have just a chill nite.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093675687/in/photostream/

we did a shot at mezzrow’s in exchange for leaving mel’s backpack (full of books, had intentions of studying) there. once we finally leave adventurehouse we do anything to avoid going back cos we are such lazy shut ins.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093675157/in/photostream/

needless to say the kid at the movie store was not appreciative of our fun cheer. he was tapping his fingers impatiently on the counter which distracted me when i was talking to him, melodie picked up on that by seeing my eyeballs gaze over to his tapping looks over her shoulder at him and says can you stop that? hahaha.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094274592/in/photostream/

i don’t know what those say and i don’t care.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093674183/in/photostream/

look i am a nice girl.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5094273610/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093673011/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5093672751/in/photostream/

i wish i had some quirky thing to leave you with but i don’t.

until next time.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089345317/

hey rocky lets do this.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089943632/in/photostream/

jason is like, what the hell is going on today?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089943996/in/photostream/

oh just dropping this cute little spazz off at woof and shloof. shoof is yiddish for something i forget. you look into it why do i have to do all the work around here jesus.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089944474/in/photostream/

i don’t own a dog. my dog mentality is such that, i don’t know what the hell is going on over there you know? i feel like it’s a huge responsibility and i may as well give birth if i want to be held accountable for another’s life and overall well being.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089944942/in/photostream/

in the future yes definitely but at the moment, no, i can barely care for myself haha.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089347459/in/photostream/

if i had a dog i would definitely (firstly, have to be rich) drop it off at this place.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089347849/in/photostream/

staring problems much?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089348203/in/photostream/

rocky was in heaven. he’d never had a spa day before. you’re welcome rocky you can pay me back in form of a round or two of drinks. your mother was away in alliston battling some serious asthma at the time so it was the least we could do, someone is suffering so lets get you pampered. ok that joke fell flat.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089348767/in/photostream/

now get my picture with the thing so it looks more believable i mean, err… i totally go to dog spas on the regular. obviously.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089349023/in/photostream/

rocky knows a trick and this is it. posing for pictures trick.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089947410/in/photostream/

i know a trick too it’s called drinking profusely until your legs are skinny.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089947736/in/photostream/

i swear to you he is having the time of his life.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089350707/in/photostream/

there is nothing like being patronized about doggie world. luckily i saw an episode of dog whisperer once so i was fully prepared for this. i think you’d want to let your dog loose for a day with these types of people who are dog knowledgeable and maybe sort of insane? i think everyone is insane for whatever field they’re involved and thrive in, you’d have to be. why would i leave my dog with someone who didn’t operate mentally in dog vs humans world? but still guy, i borrowed a dog for this so that should tell you right there how far you can go with me.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089949156/in/photostream/

jesse knows his shit. everything he said i learned in one episode of dog whisperer, ok maybe from oprah too. wait a minute, didn’t that guy get the dog whisperer show because of oprah? pretty sure he did.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089949674/in/photostream/

if i was a dog i’d love this place. great facilities, very spacious, and dog friends to run around and play with plus they walk you and give you loads of attention and consider your feelings and other new agey dog stuff.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089351947/in/photostream/

catering to the st. clair crowd too so, haha snicker, demanding elite twats and their precious little baby wabies as clientele woof and shloof know how to play the game. these are all my opinions by the way as a professional person of the world constantly collecting data and uh, drawing conclusions and such.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089950440/in/photostream/

all the other dogs were set out on their walk while rocky became familiar with his new territory.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089352747/in/photostream/

he gave’r all over the place.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089951202/in/photostream/

dogs leave scent messages everywhere. rocky is picking up his message and leaving a voicemail in return i guess. he’s saying no, your message sucked, mine is more intelligent.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089353453/in/photostream/

how exhausting to be a dog.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089353843/in/photostream/

the dog castle can also be used as a time out those arched doors below there, you slide a slat or cage whatever down the front. i can totally picture a wastecase stuffing himself in there at a party and us all locking him in. claustrophobia freak out to the max. i think if you punished a dog this way they’d learn their lesson straight away. shit’s scary in there i think.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089952376/in/photostream/

dog fashions.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089354839/in/photostream/

i spy $25, seems fair? i’d probably pay more but i am an idiot like that.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089953304/in/photostream/

i like the blue one with vintage space kid print, super cute.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089356031/in/photostream/

so apparently this whole time jesse and rocky were having a conversation, an unspoken one. rocky was running around the place and jesse was talking to us but really he was mind fucking rocky. brilliant.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089356445/in/photostream/

he was letting him know who was boss, lead alpha dog. i am not going to acknowledge you until i am ready to, type thing. i also learned that from the dog whisperer therefore it must be true cos it was on television. when someone tells you they are having a conversation with a dog i dare you not to explode in a fit of laughter. i think i was drunk still from gorillaz.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089955160/in/photostream/

on to phase two, party room. look how much space. perfect.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089955460/in/photostream/

and a huge mirror i guess for the dogs to look at themselves?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089955764/in/photostream/

it was like letting loose a bolt of lightning, i was really happy for rocky.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089358277/in/photostream/

some dog politics water area. jesse turned the dog battle on its ear and gave everyone water like moses or something. makes good sense to me, different heights for different dogs and even the little guys can sneak in there for a drink and then someone can do some garden watering too?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089358619/in/photostream/

awww heartbreaking dog eye contact. this guy was just getting a little cut he was happier in real life than this emotional photo leads you to believe.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089358887/in/photostream/

oh look another pun.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089359225/in/photostream/

good to know my dog will not go thirsty.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089359617/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089957824/in/photostream/

looks like the green room of a porno set. the dogs must love it. there’s a funny parallel to porn stars and dogs hey? depressing.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089360293/in/photostream/

dog walk back door area, cowboy saloon doors so no break outs.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089958526/in/photostream/

pee bells. training the dogs to ding them when they need to go wee. smart. then you have a bell at home if you were a keener. ding the bell when you go out with your dog for a piss a few times and see if he gets it.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089958868/in/photostream/

rocky is so cute and inquisitive. i wonder what they are “talking” about right here. hahaha sorry i can’t help it.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089959194/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089959542/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089362027/in/photostream/

nice shoes, jason. the floors in there are made from tire, bouncy and soft yet firm so no loud dog clicking of feet and maybe it absorbs barking too?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089362359/in/photostream/

staff office also doubles as a time out room.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089362665/in/photostream/

the spaw.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089362939/in/photostream/

that other dog was very friendly. SPAWESOME.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089961428/in/photostream/

pomeranian’s hair doesn’t grow if you cut it so, don’t cut it. you can trim the under parts though. rocky got his butt cleaned, nails clipped, other dog stuff i forget and wouldn’t remember or know about as i am a cat person.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089363907/in/photostream/

pretty nice day for a dog though eh. playing and partying and primping.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089364189/in/photostream/

your own little nook so your leash and whatever else crap you adorn your dog with doesn’t get mixed up.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089962728/in/photostream/

kinda wanted to climb up that.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089963128/in/photostream/

ok dude time to go. another dog whispering we learned is, rocky leaves us, we don’t leave rocky.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089963574/in/photostream/

and i liked that we had to whisper it to each other in case rocky was listening and understanding.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089366157/in/photostream/

no separation anxiety here.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089964484/in/photostream/

humans aren’t even supposed to be allowed passed that barrier. seriously. i was like uh how am i supposed to review your facilities if i can’t go and review your facilities? raymi always gets the vip treatment so i got to climb through that little door haha kidding. that door is for when tons of clients come at once just let ‘em loose through the doggie door and sayonara suckers.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089964892/in/photostream/

complimentary hippie shit bags.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5089367413/in/photostream/

we’re being told here not to leave rocky, i got all nervous like ok we’re walking away now which is the same as leaving, right? dog whispering is insane, there are lots of rules and careful considerations. jesse got up to leave us with rocky in his arms and then i started to feel separation anxiety. dogs pick up on that energy, so it’s partially for the dog but hugely for the owner too. their mandate is to make your little guy as calm and happy and “spaw”ed out as possible and then they email you a report at the end of it.

so proud of rocky! jen said it made her smile when she read it. i love the extra mile they go. now, the fabfind deal has expired but if you go within the next month and say you saw their business on raymi’s blog, jesse is willing to give you a discount. i can’t remember what it exactly was going to be cos he was dog whispering as we were getting out of there so you’ll have to talk to him. they do dog sitting too. clearly.

ok byeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084619076/in/photostream/

after my morning at the dog spa with rocky (you’ll see that later) jason dumped me at queen to head off to his store and i rounded the corner into a raymi fan.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084024675/in/photostream/

happy birthday! no really, it’s her birthday today. she said her and her friend saw me last night but didn’t say hi. i asked where, strachan? where the hell is strachan i was pretty mangled last nite. her dog is strong and totally pulled me down the sidewalk. i totally forget your name sorry. also hi to the girl in the acc club bar last nite try and resurface that email you sent me.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084024343/

i am blog spotted daily. multiple times even. not bragging just fact stating. i also brush my teeth and blink daily. see? was that bragging? my niece asks me about that all the time it’s really bad for my ego. i call it blog spotting cos that’s where my blog began, on a blogspot.com makes sense right.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084025265/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084025517/in/photostream/

then i did something i said i wouldn’t do since some retard left me a hater comment from the drake posing as management. it was skidfanie’s birthday on the 13th so i picked her up a little somethin-somethin. ew i hate that saying.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084025845/in/photostream/

of course i bought myself a little (barf) somethin somethin too. anyone who ignores a 50% off sign is an idiot.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084026665/in/photostream/

why is cool so unsexy?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084621098/in/photostream/

you’ll have to wait til she opens it. i wanted to spoil/surprise her this year as i completely forgot her bday last year when i was living in burlington. omg it’s been a year now i can do raymi archive posts again though i dunno if i want to open up that can of worms. hmm. anyway i forgot last year cos i was in a serious weed life changing fog. no excuses i am a good friend and i want to be even better. I AM A PROFESSIONAL FRIEND. hahaha.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084621330/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084027361/in/photostream/

that’s a keeper for sure.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084027629/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084109815/

i added the rafia. PROFRIEND.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084622116/in/photostream/

i bought some apples. i’m going to try a new starvation diet. it is apples and tea and booze. wish me luck!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084622368/in/photostream/

karate shoes.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084028471/in/photostream/

what am i supposed to do with this flag fly it over adventurehouse so that eligible bachelor scenesters will know there’s hipsters inside?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084028709/in/photostream/

love the detail.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084623450/in/photostream/

i seriously have not vacuumed this rug and i bought it in january. oh the secrets contained. probably hash crumbs too. apparently the vacuum doesn’t reach my room?

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084623712/in/photostream/

sexxxxxy chicken. as fat as i could ever become, rest assured i will never ever have cankles. that’s right bitches.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084624020/in/photostream/

i was becoming really worried yesterday that my outlandish bloat was getting severely out of hand but then i just got my period like a normal person. so used to it being late forgot all about it. phew thank fuck.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084624304/in/photostream/

i am so scattered and busy i can’t even get through a magazine. the sun through my hair makes it look extra spinstery. this photo reminded me about laundry in the washer my favourite part in laundry time is transferring it to the dryer. i am marge simpson. only 12% of the time. nah, more so old fashion.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084624634/in/photostream/

that part’s a bit egomaniacal i mean really, tom.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084624876/in/photostream/

look i’m being laid back!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/raymilauren/5084030605/in/photostream/

still laid back!

steph get here and entertain me already so i don’t have to work.

aw i just received this little love letter:

Hey,

A silent supporter and blog lurker,
Mel

everyone who sends me nice emails and i say SO BLOGGING THIS and then i don’t i apologize it’s just that i am so overwhelmed and busy and disorganized. i read them while out on my blackberry and then i get home and everything’s gone into a blackhole. thank you for taking the time to write to me i will always appreciate it. from now on be sure to attach a photo along with, of yourself or a pile of clothes, a present you want to give to me…

happy friday dudes.

i am going to do tricep extensions until she gets here and some laundry. there’s prosecco in the fridge i forgot to get oj though maybe i could squeeze apples into juice? just kidding i am not that insane/domesticated/desperate.

update: steph has been at poor john’s she threw rocks at my window and rang the buzzer for an hour. guess the doorbell no longer works. now i can buy oj.

dear life YOU JUST GOT OWNED.

not really.