that busted camera is mocking me.
when i wake up early i sit here and wear myself out on the www until i can’t keep my eyes open anymore then i get up and make espresso i see how long i can go before i have a complete physical collapse.
sometimes there just aren’t enough blogs to stalk.
i am in an explosive bad mood i think i pretty much flopped the audition last nite though i can still be a no-talking burlesque dancer which i am thinking maybe i don’t want to do it anymore cos my time is super valuable though fil just guilted me back into doing it and i busted fil’s camera i should have just stayed in bed then the camera would be fine. it fell off the table and the lense was open all the way nothing popped or shattered it just won’t shut is there a toronto camera doctor? if not it’s time for a new one. HUGE BAD MOOD HUUUGE! i also had the craziest longest shittiest dream where some girl was kissing fil and hugging him in front of me and he was all cool about it so i slapped her strangled her punched her in the face multiple times then came to and apologized profusely and even fil was like what is wrong with you and she told all my friends and they were very disgusted with me and then the rest of the dream’s theme was centred around how much of a fucking loser i am basically then i open this email this morning FOR REAL:
Hi Raymi,
I’m still reading your blog and enjoying it. Just thought you would think this was funny….I dreamt that Phil and I kissed last night and it was the best kiss that I have ever had. My subconscious must have kept an imprint of how hot I think Phil is from photos i’ve seen on your blog. I wish someone would kiss me like that in real life, it was awesome. He! Goodluck with the audition. You will blitz it no doubt. All the best, Karen in Oz x
psa give Phil a big smooch from me:)
PEEP HOW NONCHALANT SHE IS!
i told her i would stab her.
it’s ok she wrote back and apologized but not for kissing fil in her dream or being in my dream either though i don’t know what she really looks like.
what i don’t get is why in my dream was I apologizing for her kissing fil yeah i get it i punchisized her face but isn’t messing with man a ticket to fuck my shitupsville? stupid dream.
oh and then i was playing with bats and locusts and ping pong with an ex-boyfriend and driving a race car in the 1920s on a sidewalk.
stay tuned for a story about the most annoying chick EVER from the bar last nite.
oh nice i might be getting a speaking role in this movie now i would be a burlesque dancer that goes home with one of the dudes and i am topless and it’s sort of a funny role, sweet. i’m going to audition for it tonite.
can’t eat it but one can dream
yes i am a huge asshole for doing that and i should burn in hell.
me: i need to get something to wear to yer work thing
fuck
last year i looked like a potato this year i have to look slammin
Phil: oh god no dont worry about it
i want to call in sick
me: well are you or aren’t you
your wants wont help me not look like a potato
hey gang on thursday i am going to be a burlesque dancer in a canadian feature film called hank and mike i think it will be in the film festival in 2008 sometime and then after that who knows. initially i was maybe suppose to be a nude model in this scene with the dude who does the voice of fat tony for the simpsons (joe mantegna) but i wasn’t “fat enough” or “reubenesque enough” can you believe it? i am sort of dreading the shoot cos i am pasty and i don’t have shoes and i don’t have a robe. i have to get one. it’s too late to go tanning cos i will most definitely fuck it up and have lobster ass.
laura bennett, jugface, bottom middle
is anyone watching project runway these days? don’t you HATE that jugface pregnant bitch!?! when we watch it i say at least ten times how much i hate her and how much of a bitch she is. all she does is criticise EVERYONE else’s work and then during her one-on-one camera chats she talks about how she criticised everyone else’s work and how she didn’t jump up off the couch to greet the no-chin/neck tattoo guy I FUCKING HATE HER. fil told me to tell you that he hates that shovelface too.
she’s pretentious and snotty and a tattle-tail and cannot take criticism at all but is always number 1 to dish it out i am in fucking love with hating her. last nite’s episode we got to see her apartment and her 4 boys, 5 maybe? i dunno but i was thinking BURN ON YOU YOU WANT A GIRL SO BAD AND THE ONE IN YOUR STOMACHE WILL PROBABLY BE A DUDE and her husband looks like einstein.
you really need to watch the show to get the full grasp of just how much her face really is a jug.
all of her designs are exactly alike, long plunging necklines, empire waisted cocktail dresses zzz AND when she sees other people’s designs she goes over and tells them that she is worried about them planting seeds of doubt and insecurity, she can’t handle competition and the only way to thwart it INSTEAD of creating something unique is to bash someone else’s design FUCK OFF.
this is the best mad tv spoof ever:
me: why dont u write about last nite
when u lost the ability to communicate
because you were in a drunk vortex
Phil: super busy
i will tomorrow
me: i am kidding
Phil: i was
me: k
were we kidding
Phil: y
me: k
sigh im bored im going to go figure something to do with my life
should i be an engineer too
Phil: i thought you are going to be a famous(er) internet/media figure/writer
me: yeah well that too
i am already making that happen by eating less, which is boring
Phil: then write more
me: i figure while i am eating less i could be a pilot
Phil: work on that gallery thing you were talking about before
make that happen
me: fil i am taking the piss right now
jeez
Phil: oh
me: i have to wii exercise
see you
Phil: i am distracted with numbers right now
k bye
