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This is what a date with the Minx is like Ready, set, go.

And Happy Birthdayte Bechnique while I am at it! Here is your present.

It’s the ORHMA: Ontario Resorts and Hotels Restaurant Awards Gala. That is Tony and I, he is on the board, I was his date! Baha kidding, Muffy was his date. Yes that is her name.

What the hell were we talking about here? Lots of people watching and colleague said you are creating a sensation. Glad I wore that dress I guess.

Oh look it’s me! See how I have spy espionage on me at all events, creepy right? Creeps. Meanwhile I’m walking around like a spanish dancer slut hahaha nice wicked your hero is the best like a poor man’s Angelina Jolie Mr. and Mrs Smith ball spy scene ahh gad dream job.

We will be having a burlesque show here. Steffan and I are becoming buddies whether he likes it or not (not that I have time for friends anyway) I gave him a hug and said thank you for everything you have ever done for me awww. Then we talked party talk, both lifestyle and future. I will be rehearsing tonight and then every single day until FEBRUARY ELEVENTH. AT THE BOVINE. 9PM. Flyer coming later. It will be packed. It’s a Singles Mixer too so if no one has girlfriends or boyfriends come get laid get wasted, heck I know I was practically suicidal last year so I feel for you and I want to party with you. Teacher will also be on deck polluted to cope with his stripping girlfriend who does weird shit in public for attention and then everybody makes fun of it together afterward. Like Hot Rod. We watched it on the weekend or yesterday which was a mini-weekend mid-week spike cos someone else “was sick” yesterday. Blaha.

My godmother said I am looking pale. Take me away then ;). Omg please do put me on a rocket ship the heck out of here. I need a winter holiday. Do I look like shit here? I think so whatever I was a bit stressed about MTV but we gave’r boy did we ever. Ps. Lois I thought this was supposed to be today and I wanted extra tickets for you and my mom fyi before she starts mouthing off about why she wasn’t invited. Birthday treat for Bechnique too.

This went to charity. It is massive. MASSIV. MASSIF!


That dude’s white hair is awesome what are you a scientist? Some rich eccentric, I like it. Those guys who secretly do blow and then stare into the room like it’s a galaxy before them. I can’t remember if there were any ascots.

The weather is why I wore these dumb shoes, too slushy to wear open toe burlesque heels and I didn’t feel like trying to be a barbie in my guess stilettos, too obnoxious.

I wonder what made everyone sick. I cannot tell you how immensely relieved by having dodged that particular bullet. Oy vey I would lose my goddamn mind.

Yeah ok cool story there bro.

You can see me beside Kernel Sander’s head.

I did not want to talk business but at the champagne station Bechnique went and came back and said someone wants to talk to you ugh thanks! I blundered my way through this awkwardly and was like just check it out. I gave them my only card and Bechnique was like SEE I should be your manager. She just wants to boss me around haha yeah dude, colleague has owed me new cards for a month now.

After awhile I was like THIS IS AN AWESOME CRUISE SHIP THAT I AM IN THE BELLY OF. Originally our VDay show was going to be here but it was too early to get it together. No matter, next time!

We were the cool dudes standing around at all times, except hot girls. With a personal photog. I felt famous but I was not ready for it, I liked it and I was like getting totally gong-showed in honour of my new favourite idol Frankie of Celebrity Big Brother. Blond hair, check. Loud red dress, Check. Partner in crime, check. Have to leave to go watch myself on MTV, check. Ahah fucking asshole!

I am a spanish ice dancer.

Where is the vodka? HAHAhahah No seriously, where is it? I don’t even remember if we got any. This was a weddingless wedding! Open bar, classy reception, holla! Wish we could have stayed longer.

It took three people to make our drinks. Kidding! People relax!

You said it bottle of sparkling! Give me some more of these please. Delicious.

I am getting cut eye. TYPICAL!

I had Yogurty’s for lunch/dinner is one reason why we passed on eating. The second reason is I have a Burlesque show on the horizon. I ate crap all day long yesterday though to make up for it don’t worry.

He was the city councillor at our table in place of the mayor. I have his card. It has brail on it. I made a dumb joke and said blind people read my blog ahah (they do it’s true) then he went away then he was on stage and then I was momentarily proud of him and completely buzzed like hey that guy we talked to in line is doing something look honey. I could only tell him apart from all the other old white haired rich guys from his tie. Dude if I were an old white dude I would be wearing an ascot. It works.

This was the alleged sensation we did you proud mes amis. I just stand there and people go bananas! Do you want me at and to cover your next function? I also have a hot single mom that dudes fall in love with and go googly-eyed for and an entire crew of cougs at my disposal ;).

They gave 10k to George Brown.

It was a jolly fuckin good time. Peace!

Presidential. Someone also said I was jiggly AHAH RIGHT! You wish baby.

Jokester. Many hats.

Gotta bounce though!

Cos I am on tv!

I was the deciding determining vote in Tommy Hollywood winning, swayed it! Could have gone him or Erik obvi but I was like I dunno, Jersey Shore is popular for a reason guys. He’s polished too blabbity blah.

Mom you were awesome and nice jugs.

I’ll post the clip with my mom soon for the americans and uk and elsewhere fans. Wearing a Valentine K sweater, holla!

Omg dying hahaha Bye for now be back soon!


  1. That was a great night! why does my expression on my face look like the grinch that stole birthdays?! lol.

  2. FINALLY someone points out my genius! Thank YOU Ginny :) the dress came from my friend allison, stuffed in a bag of borrowed dresses beneath my bed for a year or so and she was just like, keep it. I never tried it on. But then I did and was like, I have been hanging on to this dynamite creation for so long and didn’t know it.

  3. Being an it girl in attendance of a prestigious black tie event does not equal cheeseballs, jealous breath. It’s all business baby. Go fuck yourself at your boring job now buhhbye.

  4. go to boom and order a muffy muffin on me!

    also you’re lying is my new favourite catch phrase of the twins on celebrity big brother i bet you didnt even know that

  5. Verily, Raymi’s mom has got it goin’ on. And her knockers make me weep a little everytime I see them. It’s about as close to a religious experience as a godless asshole like me is likely to have.

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