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Let’s have a toast to the jerkoffs That’ll never take work off. Baby, I got a plan. Run away fast as you can

oh hello there welcome to the land of absinthe hangover.

it would be nice if my brain could function right now.

i’ve been pretty good lately so uh wait what am i talking about i think i had just recovered from friday’s dinner review. but anyway. you know how it is.

that kanye thing is fucking amazing. still haven’t gotten through it all yet.

let me collect my thoughts here.

why is allergy medication so bloody expensive?

the life in review backwards. howling hour at crooked star. place of my very first art show. weird to be there after hours.

and who are these people? who cares. that’s christian. girl i forget the name of but she was super impressed by my bar fly tricks.

david was traaaaaaaaaaaaaashed. steph and i met him last week at watusi. funny french guy super quick and kind of a prick too, just my people.

and the two looking the most like each other asians i have ever fucking seen. i even said “you people” and had to backpeddle out of it. guy on left was fucking with me, wasn’t actually offended. thanks for shorting out some MORE of my braincells. i am the most gullible person in the world.

they were pretending not to know that they look so alike. assholes.

seriously what right have you eh?

sunday nite pre-crash photo. boring.

pol. there. that a better nickname?

courtney love look coming along nicely hahahah.

suzzi was mega-blasted. don’t let drunk people style you for photographs cos it’s all on you not them and then there’s evidence. she tucked my hair behind a different ear. do you have like, a part you are OCD about or a side of your face your bangs CAN ONLY be swept across no exception to this uptight illogical rule? well she went against my grain but i let it happen. this is what i was thinking at the time.

i started working out again and gorging less. i switched to the elliptical from the treadmill to not have bulky ass thighs anymore.

get your paws off me! haha. i love suzzi she is adorable and funny. craziest jenga player ever. i’ve never been so stressed out before watching someone take their turn i have videos of screaming my head off i couldn’t take it hahaha.

see told you to go easy. you can see a burn mark on one of the pieces hahaa.

before. stew is super stressed. we were almost afraid to do well cos we knew it would be her turn again.

this mighta been the spiral one we set up. punk rock. it doesn’t have to be perfect, i always thought it did because i have neurotic mental problems about order and structure. only about certain things though. playing cards, crazy eights, you better keep that shit neat. i am no fun to play with.

stew is one of the best dressers i know. our outfits kinda matched in a clockwork orangey kind of way. you’ll see.

i am never wearing that hat with my hair down again looks so wrong. i don’t have the right shaped head for those kind of hats.

bad weekend for hair days. i washed it too many times. the gym makes it gross then i have to wash it and then i have newly washed annoying hair. today i’m not working out and just leaving it a sloppy mess i don’t fucking care. ABSINTHE BOURBON TEQUILA LIIIIFE!

i am turning into ron sexsmith apparently. i can’t go out for like an hour by myself in between one thing and meeting others without some asshole recognizing me and making me feel like shit about it in my comments. i have to move away to another planet in a galaxy far away with a rose for my only friend. aw my new friend dave said this Don’t let things upset you. People are always mean/crude to things they don’t understand and envy ambition and drive.

Like I said, most innovators, artists are manic-depressives, lonely people… you shouldn’t have ot be though.

that sweater is not doing my figure any favours.

we look like figurines from a model train world, charles dickens style. pip pip!

tally ho! those dyke boots jen gave me from central. aw i miss her. we had the best time opening the bar together this summer. one time we got really baked off hospital weed. bad idea. took me forever to open the patio it was like working in hot soup slow motion (broiling hot day) opening up the largest mill street umbrella was impossible meanwhile she was upstairs in her own wonky hell an hour later we reconvene by the bar and i ask her if this weed is she finding it kinda, incapacitating? she’s like yeah oh right it’s that kind of weed. couple of geniuses. i know about florence and the machine cos of her one day i was really depressed so she made a girl power playlist and cosmic love was on it i’m gonna see if i can get one more plus one for guest list at sound academy and bring her along with skidbarfanie and i.

i sweep chimneys now and stew is a racialist.

we went to see jackass 3D IT IS SO FUCKING GOOD GO SEE IT DAD!

there is absolutely no way to enjoy that movie not in the theatre. i was non-stop howling, loudest in the theatre. i am a really good movie date by the way.

great pic.

also amazing. fuck this camera, alen, i need a better one.

soooooome of them are nice though. i cannot rely on the flukes. i have higher standards than this.

why the fuck would you wear these to the movies? i don’t even wear heels on special occasions.

maybe that’s why i don’t have a boyfriend hahah.


slob chic.

free seafood salad cos i found a piece of plastic in it at the very end. pol says he’s going to carry around pieces of plastic with him from now on.

i didn’t even make a stink about it. ate it all pretty much then saw it. big whoop. pol was paying for it anyway hahaha but yeah i casually mention to the waiter i found plastic in the salad fyi. manager slimeball comes over with two free apps vouchers and comps it. $20 is a lot for a bullshit salad. it wasn’t that bad, hit the spot. i never went to milestones before either. i really love chain restaurants and spying on normal people, the general public. i always feel like i am an alien visiting from another planet (why are there two other planet references in this post i am obviously drunk still) when i go to shitty places where jocks and rich snob boring types go to blow money on overpriced not that good but you’re tricked into thinking it is food. you’re basically paying for the flatware and the renovation and what the restaurant represents, i feel. if you eat here, then you are this kind of person. if you eat there, then you are that kind of person. i can make generalizations forever.

saturday i went to that new cantina place i forget the name i might have written it down? i really like it, definitely going back. awesome service.

low key casual yet fancy(er-ish) place.

i wore my red sweater two nites in a row.

woah ew i do not look good with boy hair. looks like i go out a lot but i assure you, you go out more than me. i stay in by myself all day long every day like a shut in then i go to the gym then i go home again. some days i don’t even open my mouth to speak for hours. when you document stuff it’s typically when you go out so all i have are photos of, going out. despite the majority of my time spent sitting on my ass on this very couch or on my bike. ok i’ll make a going out graph and then i’ll see that i actually DO go out a lot. i just feel like time spent alone deserves rewarding. ask my liver.

oh and i made this, it’s shitty, not the reaaal flier trust me it’ll be better. i just decided to stop stressing out about this.

i am going to the leaf game tonite. PUMPED. my jersey is at my dad’s though. i have the best outfit in mind to mind fuck people into thinking i’m a puck bunny it’s going to rule and i’ll be wasted after one sip too. GO LEAFS.

11 thoughts on “Let’s have a toast to the jerkoffs That’ll never take work off. Baby, I got a plan. Run away fast as you can

  1. hahahah surf city. WHY?

    i like how i was basically wearing a tshirt (facial expression) that said FUCK OFF DON’T TALK TO ME at watusi and you still managed to pick someone up. impressive.

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