i’m a lousy lazy lay
actually i’m not a lousy lay, i’m pretty good in the sack i just prefer to not put much effort into it sometimes. like i put so much effort into making the vessel dynamite. sick. slammin’. so maybe yeah, you pick up the slack now for me will ya?
so the red flag and i have been pissing the day away. the red flag is my current kill btw. i’ve been trying to exercise some restraint in the discussing what i’m bagging department, well, in the not discussing it department. discussing it on my blog that the universe reads department. now why is he a red flag? many reasons. well, for starters he’s an emotional island which seems to be my fuckin’ cup of tea. he’s also rife with baggage. it was going to end last week actually, i foresaw it ending in one giant mess but things changed, we had “the talk” so we both know where we stand for the most part.
knowing something can’t go anywhere is a bit of a relief but it’s also like maybe it can? you still know it can’t though. i see him as a challenge, i like challenges. i think i can conquer people. i ensnare them in my dramatic world and they enjoy their stay in raymiland if but for a short while.
so it’s exclusive banging for now but it’s not like i’m not looking for something better. he said that he won’t be able to give me what i need and thats fine i don’t need a boyfriend right now. he says for now i’m on the rollercoaster at raymiland and i like it. i’m gonna ride again.
i’ve made contact with an old consort from a good ten years ago at least. retardedly good looking, hasn’t aged at all. now this guy is a major deviant so who knows where it’ll go, how it’ll go. i do not intend to fuck him, so there’s that decision made for now. it’s still a jealousy trap which we all know i’m a huge believer in/fan of.
when i contacted red flag i told him my intentions were entirely indecent. i was thinking about how i was coming back to the city and maybe i should have some extracurricular activities lined up for myself. he took the bait and off we went. i remember feeling sad after/during the first encounter cos i figured that woulda been it. i’ll have to come back to this later kinda gotta split and i’m covering for someone tonite. later wieners!