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WOndERLanD

my brother took this photo.

at one point when i finally stop screaming you hear dave behind me let a big one go (1:14) and all along before that too haha. this was our third time on it i finally got the courage to hold my camera during the ride hanging on with my middle finger shoved through the tiny kewpie strap, the time before i wimped out at the top of the ride and shoved it in my pocket before we plummeted. after that i made videos on every ride and even got told off over a speaker to put it away, dave too. we all had to take chill pills and 5-7 beers each throughout the day to get by. fil‘s acting all brave in this video. dave wussed out of making a video this time he clenched it down by his side and after each ride his hair was standing on end like edward scissorhands. i made a video of a little girl crying cos she was too small to go on this teacup ride then i gave her my blythe button and she was still crying but took it anyway i wanted to tell her dad you know that thing was probably like ten dollars can you make her say thank you. haha. more photos and videos to come on this post so keep checking back. also hi amanda we eventually went back to your beer station (the only one serving in the park!) and you were gone.

my brother blowing cig smoke at me, gross.

we finally arrived and everyone is super anxious so we had a chill pill and headed straight for a beer stop. the older you get the more sensitive i guess.

good thing dad was on the scene.

ok fil’s hand in this shot is an accident but we saw this happen more than once yesterday. if you’re um, husky, you cannot ride the behemoth (which is why they have a seat at the beginning of the line for you to test out, they need to be more vocal about it though). it’s really embarrassing for the person cos the workers take turns trying to slam down the thigh rest over and over and then the person has to do the walk of shame then they announce sorry for the wait everybody are you ready to riiiide!? dave got a shot of this guy making eye contact with him CRINGE. also fyi do not wear your bap-style hoodie to wonderland ever, we saw ten hundred of ‘em seriously.

here is the crying girl, she had to watch her mom and brother go on cos she was too little. i hope she keeps that button 4lyfe.

i wanted to film more of her less of the ride cos she was really sobbing hard but i don’t think her dad would have appreciated it.

post every ride dave’s hair looked like this.

do not wear a hat on the behemoth. dumb move. after you ride this thing, drop zone is a complete waste of time. it’s nothing. video of that too.

oh yeah the first ride we (my idea) stupidly chose to go on was the one you lie down on like superman. bad for queasy stomachs full of beer ha ha.

that is my nose juice after riding the dragonfire. WHAT it was cold!

before hair.

after.

complete waste of time the ride was jammed, we went through kidzone cos we heard there was a licensed patio but it wasn’t serving. fil and dave insisted on the ghoster coaster. yeah thanks guys.

beer decoy.

after walking the entire park for beer that wasn’t there, waiting in a line-up for nothing, i felt exactly like these muhfuckers. we went into this place you used to be able to drink at but now it’s so you have to buy the 20 dollar buffet to get in i was so annoyed i just walked out while the guy was still talking. wtf we came for rides and drinks not elaborate shitty banquet food what is this place, disneyland? ps. stop telling us where we can go get beer if it’s not actually being served you wasted a good 40 minutes of our time TWICE that happened.

nice.

purchasing a picture costs 14 bucks, f that. take a snap of the monitor quickly before they wipe it off. i found a funny one of a couple on top of a garbage can i bet noel would like it.

sweeney tod.

oh whatever fil.

i wanted to say to these teenagers haven’t you seen adventureland this game’s a rip!

top gun kills your ears/head. not fun.

the park closed at 8. it wasn’t open to the public yet so maybe that’s why some rides were rusty. we got cheap tickets too, it was nice having less people/crowds and the weather worked in our favour for that too i suppose.

here i am wailing like a dude cos i had lost my ability to scream by this point. i sound like a total goon i cannot even watch this video.

see how shitty drop zone seems in comparison to behemoth now. don’t even bother.

27 thoughts on “WOndERLanD

  1. I am jealous. I have not been to Wonderland in a few years. I used to have a gimmick where I would sing “You’re Nobody Til Somebody Loves You” and time it so I get to the end right as we’re going over and down the hill. “So find yourself sommmmmmmmmmmme… body to love….” WHOOSH! People thought it was hilarious.

    Still no leaves on the trees? Shit, I have to come back tomorrow!!!

  2. That video of the little girl crying killed me, so damn funny. You should try to track her down, send a copy of to her parents for sure in future counselling sessions, HA!

  3. oh there’s buds in toronto for sure sean.

    yeah D she was adorable and broke my drunken heart. i was this close to explaining the significance of blythe to her.

  4. hahaha awwww, the crying girl is my new best friend. Same shit always happened to me ’cause i was (er, still am) such a Shorty McShorterson.
    Love these vids, though– nothin’ like the sound of a rollercoaster to make you anxiously await your local summer county fair… ::counts the days::
    Also, you are brave folk for drinking beer. Brave, brave folk.

  5. Ah, you’re right, she was pretty heart breaking. So sad, so far from the teacups. You totally should have told her about blythe. But then again, you kinda looked like someone out of a ‘most watned’ poster with the orange hat and all, and freaked her out even more :S

  6. I MUST make it to Wonderland this year. I say that every year. Behemoth looks amazing!! Although, it would suck to be on the larger side and have to walk away from it. I imagine some ppl go to the park for that ride specifically.
    Great videos!!!

  7. aw fun, makes me want to go there. only been once.
    my favourite was top gun. that park was the first time i eve really did the whole ‘rides’ thing. i was terrified because there was a warning saying overweight people might not fit (not those words ha) and so i was sweating and panicking in the lineup and kyle was trying to reassure me that this way bigger girl in front of us was able to go i could too. that’s my shitty ass story. kyle told me to say wonderland sucks in comparison to cedar point so you should check it out sometime. <3

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