place your bets on how many kifey looks i’ll get tonite in this get up:

sorry guys for being an egomaniac yesterday about this! i changed my shirt last minute and then i decided to just ignore every woman in the universe cos i actually wanted to enjoy myself so i didn’t really keep track. kifey isn’t even in the urban dictionary wtf. it means smelly, dirty, gross, pungent as in she has kife or kifey c**t. omg look at me censoring c u n t. i just think kifey and c**t together is the grossest thing imaginable. disgusting words.

told ya steph!

yes i will be sure to strike all of these poses, winner um, gets a prize!

this is pretty much exactly what my drunk tank mugshot in manhattan beach looked like probably pretty much exactly, sprinkle a little winona cray cray hair on top and BAM, dead ringer. god i want to get my hands on it so badly and then die of shame and embarrassment and then make t-shirts out of it. ps. if i got a little head’s up about that ‘hood being the equivalent of daycare land maybe i’da lightened up a tad, yes, nothing is my fault. i wasn’t even drunk just totally insane! (even better!) and then from the back of the cruiser i started screaming that i was FRENCH CANADIAN then it was curtains. hi.

me: i have a joker zit

Phil: oh no!

me: oh yes
at the corner of my mouth half a centimeter away so that it extends the width of my mouth to look like the joker’s mouth

Phil: better not be a cold sore

me: i have never had one fil
its a zit
it ISNT at the corner of my mouth it is near it jesus

Phil: i cant believe my gf has mouth herpes

me: yes from all the cocks i suck everytime your head is turned

Phil: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!
11111111111111111

me: 222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222

Phil: i will get you for that comment
oh yes i will get you good for it

me: oh please

Phil: oh yes i will

omg my eyes hurt i just wasted a whole bunch of time making a new flickr set, here it is: raymi’s tickle trunk outfits!

ok as promised, finally, here is the full experience of the hidden lounge…

cozy little nook room for a gentle gathering pre/post-supper.

chutney magic, and horseradish creamy something or other wow my memory is terrible. no matter it was all tasty as hell.

fil chats up the chef.

v posh.

an awkward moment in time.

lemongrass lemonade?

delish cheeses.

round 1.

jess of prematurenostalgia fame, with her vegetarian alternative burger plate.

mine, tuna in the middle, meat to the right, the one on the left i have no recollection of other than that i fucking inhaled it.

portobello burger thing, w/ zuke in the middle i believe and cheese.

oh hi there i like the picture i already used better here lets all enjoy it again together…

those aren’t current berries, they’re a bit fruitier tasting, beneath the ice cream was something essentially like nutella, it might even have been, i can still recall the flavour of this dessert the pairing of it all was that good and i don’t bullshit about dessert cos honestly i could so do without it, my sweet tooth is practically non-existent.

pretentious shot.

destroyed.

meet paxton, he and the big titted chick to my right are wine groupies, we may just tag along on one of their niagara jaunts.

nothing beats a dark room of strangers sloshed on wine, oh the stories to listen in on and judge, my favourite.

try it for yourselves!

flickr is being a total gay right now i have spent way too much time this morning trying to upload videos of me impersonating treebeard and galadriel reading trivial pursuit questions to fil, i know, when i think too much about it i am a little depressed for myself ha, not only did i nerd out and MAKE these videos but, oh whatever, I’M AWESOME! maybe by the time i finish this piece of shit post they’ll have processed on youtube. oh! i have a feeling my right wisdom tooth or whatever those guys are back there is about to burst through my gum, the same sore throat thing i had last time is creeping up on me and the other day i took some skin off brushing my teeth, i just know something’s up. lame.

oh hey here they are enjoy rippin’ on me!

i am galadriel

i am treebeard (once warmed up i do him way better)

CRINGE!

this park is lame

jesus look how slow i’m walking and i am so totally sober.

this is from canada day

tempy inspired pool cat, check hers out!

WAHT COULD EET BEEE?

SUSPENSEFUL!

oh a ZUNE finally now we can work out again and it not be like actual WORK!

right?

i said right cid?

sort of on the same page.

as i have complained about infinity times before, the family ipod stopped working, and that other mp3 player i received just wasn’t jivin’ with us, this time ’round we’re going to do this right.

in the nick of time too as someone seems to be letting thayself go…

aw tuckered out already little buddy? yes opening this envelope was EXHAUSTING.

holy jesus!

alright alright alright, will keep you posted on how technologically retarded i am.

the reason why i am the last person on the internet to get one of these is cos i have used up all my influentiality in the form of i am a free product-hog.

flickr is wonky right now my friends so there’s no point in throwing up these jams, instead, a poll!

oh we’re cool flickr here’s some stuff

sunday was a jays game, fil went on ahead of me to meet the kids at the ghetto bar, the donut bar, country style break your heart bar in union station. i was not feeling fly at all why am i talking like this right now? it was too early for me to start pounding beers on top of my PERIOD and the heat and slight wine hangover.

pitt, rad, and marek, we got nosebleeds hence well you guys know the deal.

there was a hello kitty explosion family beneath us, another little kid had his own ds and i swear he couldn’t have been more than 2, if that!

being high up, hung, and period/sun and claustrophobic did not blend, i left during the second inning, yeah i know how lame am i.

they went to steamwhistle for complimentary beers then to the harbourfront while i watched just friends and waited for my dad and brother to arrive with my junk bikes, then i ordered chinese food and demanded fil come home and pay me attention, then pitt and jeff call totally blasted and say we have to meet them at pourhouse AS A FAVOUR. fil was wicked drunk too. it was interesting being sober and watching these fools.

pitt is no longer allowed to attend sunday afternoon baseball games hahahahahhaha.

we passed him a brochure for the hippo tour bus ride and in his inebriated state thought we were fucking with him like i had sought out a spoof pamphlet. oh pitt.

this is bullshit.

there was a minor dispute over boxing vs. tae kwon do.

yesterday.

i’m back you guys, sorry, yesterday was a total write off and i just needed a break, nahwhatimean?

anyway, here is one of my sweet rides, i went down to take pictures of it yesterday and some ding-a-ling locked their bike beside it, oh well, it’s the busted needing to be cleaned up brown/copper-looking gay thing with the white seat, one streamer etc.

any guess at how much it’s worth, bike dweebs?

coffee time, bear with me while i get myself back on this saddle.

oh but here is a nice email i received from a clever 40 year old youtube chap, we all know what they’re like:

You skank…

timothy dannenhoffer

this is regarding one of my U2 singing along drunk to in the car videos, i know right? take it easy maybe? you can read the comments below it here.