homemade rush fan sweaty, $10, bought it in williamsburg.
dunno what size it is (no tag) but i’d guesstimate at a men’s small, women’s small/medium? with extra bulk to grow a belly in.
size 12 (dudes tellin ya i was chunkay, h&m, $5.
pretty much as small as it’s going to get, it hasn’t been washed too many times.
so if you have the love handles like i do then this dude is for you and just to avoid any and all raymi you still look fatisms here i am in the nakes + pre-menses bloat:
so your hero finally saw that worst piece of pretentious shit EVER movie JUNO last nite, w/ fil, we watched it late, til 1.41am and were pissed off the entire time, in fact the fire alarm went off due to flames from my bangs from rolling my eyes so fucking much GOD who was the first person to hype this film? it wasn’t even good! the acting and the overt witty (not even) dialogue matched terribly, like, diablo totally kevin smithed herself, how can everyone in this small white bread town speak exactly the same no matter age gender occupation you asshole. fil scoffed so many times i had to shush him like don’t make this harder on me THAN IT ALREADY IS! i was prepared to threaten the movie store dude to not bloody tell anyone that i rented this movie, i wasn’t even going to tell you dudes, but it cashed so hard i couldn’t keep it to myself. fil kept saying you know we are going to see it eventually, so i gave in to the hype. ugh i wish i hadn’t. if this movie is supposed to be witty and clever and fresh (fresh according to oprah)(i’ve seen fresher dog turds) then i’m not an unemployed blogger. weak weak weak, every dick who told me this is a good movie you are in the bad books, don’t think i’ve forgotten who you are and now thanks to this film ellen page is going to be in every other clever movie that i’ll have to chug wine through just to deal, oh yeah i do that anyway but you know i’ll have to like, drink even more. and don’t you dare for a second tell me that i didn’t “get it” or that the “funny” went over my head cos i’m pretty sure i’m ten times wittier and hella more sass-mouthed than the likes of any of you are i mean really, who’s blog are we at right now? if i could throw this dvd into the sun i WOULD and would fully welcome the replacement fee.
when i remember more things i hated about this movie i’ll let you know.
oh yeah, the glamorization of teen pregnancy was pretty solid too, kudos and how uncomfortable was it trying to watch them talk about music ungh so phony.
apostle of hustle band tee, pretty much brand new barely ever worn i mean have you seen pics of me in it aside from the day i bought it (two canada day’s ago? same day i saw kiefer sutherland playing pool at the horseshoe (I KNOW OMG!)!)
you’ll probably never come across one of these bad boys ever, fil was way bitter they didn’t have boy sizes.
american apparel size small
on the back, purchased at that free feist/ apostle performance at harbourfront cos it got wicked cold out once it grew dark and i was under dressed.
THOSE COULD BE YOUR NIPPLES PEEKING THROUGH DUDE!
ten bucks ya turds.
see, room for more fatness.
this guy, medium le chateau sweater i wore basically just once, purchased on impulse for $70, you can have it for $15, it’s been washed already so i don’t think it’s getting any smaller lest you wear it and wash it like mad.
front
back
warm as hell
angora yo! dig that whimsical soft shit or what?
look at how much fun i’m having! all this fun too can be yours for the low low price of fifteen dollars!
had dinner with my dad yesterday i could tell he was somewhat embarrassed by my outfit ha.
i was about to tell fil i wanted to pitch that cooler cos i’m tired of the clutter (yesterday i went through all the clothes i have been hoarding forevs and filled two bags for charity and another for you guys to call dibs on, pics of that later) but then i get a text from jen re: the lemonade stand idea i copied off her first spring weekend in the park newsletter so yeah, that cooler will definitely come in handy. can’t wait for summer!
my dad and i ate at the fire hall in bronte (no binsk was sighted) and i had the fire crackers (pork wontons like fifty of them!) and dry dusted wings, huge motherfuckers i could only eat four brought the rest over to fil’s mum’s.
what are these?
ungh.
did you watch the season finale of family guy? did you catch the three heinous not funny things on it? 1. michael j fox as zorro who left this totally scrawly fucked up “Z” tag (parkinsons joke) 2. the oj simpson thing and there was one more disgusting thing i’ll get later it’s on a piece of paper beside the bed along with other late nite wittyisms that make no fucking sense whatsoever in the morning, anyway, family guy, not cool, weak, there’s funny and then there’s desperation. oh yeah now i remember the dead frog bit, ugh.
crappy picture taken during yesterday’s downpour, looks like she chose the wrong day to wear a white shirt.
then the sun finally came out.
that’s it, i got nothing else for you, i was balls tired yesterday like cray cray and i wore my new little white lace knee socks that actually only hang around about mid-calf area cos i don’t have little asian legs (what they’re intended for me thinks)(britt says i do have little asian legs btw oh and also a big head too) so i ripped them in several places constantly pulling them up. we hung at gibson while brad’s band rehearsed i got hungry again immediately and moaned for chinese food a hundred times, we come home and i know i have the nausea fuck, all this time i blame it on chinese food when really it’s the hooch so i made us brown rice starch i know, didn’t get to sleep ’til 3am, woke up at 1. i don’t think i can handle the late nite party anymore, it takes so much longer to get over it yeesh.
as i was doing this everyone was screaming NOOOOOOOOOO! so my facial expression is mocking them i think i was yelling NO! as well as totally looking like amy wino.
red carpet pose, why do you think all the stars do it? britt says. fair enough.
is it racist to say that eastern european women enjoy cleaning or are cleaning obsessed? my uh friend wants to know cos like this um other friend and my friend were having a little debate the other nite and he tried to convince me, i mean my friend, that that’s racism meanwhile he makes gay jokes all the time cos he has a gay friend and that’s ok yet my friend can’t make fun of eastern europeans cos my friend is polish i mean cos i grew up with lots of eastern europeans i mean my friend did, what? my friend says it isn’t racist because it isn’t a negative thing, yes it’s a generalization and stereotype but does it make you racist to point out the obvious like while we were discussing this my polish friend was also simultaneously vacuuming his ceiling.
dudes kept on cruising us cos fil and the brads were downstairs at the foals and one guy comes up to britt and says oh nice hat i like it where did you get it (right) and she barks at him HER DEAD GRANDMA dude couldn’t walk away fast enough. i feel bad for dudes and how dumb they are at bars like one two drinks and they see any chick that’s moving and think oh she’s having fun with her friend all alone THEY MUST WANT TO HAVE SEX TONITE WITH ME OR THEY WANT BOYFRIENDS THERE IS NO WAY THAT THEY ARE SINGLE jeez maybe hit a 6 or a 7 instead or read this.
yes that guy behind me is wearing pajamas. later on when we were dancing to around the world or praise you or roxanne i asked if he could move out of my dance way and said i’m half-kidding too you know and he shook his head a bit angry i said um you are WEARING PAJAMAS you are not allowed to not have a sense of humour about this right now.
then i did some honky dance square combination and britt asked me if i was drunk i said um yes but are you saying that that didn’t look awesome what i just did there cos i thought it was pretty awesome.
another guy comes up asking where he can get some food afterward i say uh las iguanas or green room he’s like oh ok what is that like i say oh well you know like, food, it’s like that, when you’re hungry, you eat it. he didn’t really get the point so i cheersed him and off he went faking his accent.
fil and brad show up to me and britt in a dance tornado and my hair is just drenched in sweat and party i love dancing!
here’s pics from lunch with poopee, i ate she didn’t, she was treated by some employer or something i dunno i wasn’t listening because i was too incensed at the fact that she ate.
i worked out before so i figured i deserved a pint and since you were wondering, i work out every other day.
hunks of bacon omfg.
my hair was still wet and looks stupid in that lighting.
