blogging has been hard lately, i don’t think i have ever said that before other than after my nervous breakdown, and even then i didn’t say that, or maybe i did, all i could bring myself to blog was three sentences every two weeks or so. the last month (as christie stated on our hangover shopping spree) has been a drunken blur, if not for digital cameras and other person’s present i doubt i could remember any of it. next year i am taking a december hiatus and fucking off and fil gets zero presents. i’m pretty sure all the boozing and xmas partying on top of xmas partying is directly associated to my kidney pain. i can’t wait for the ultrasound techie to be like doo dee doo doo OHMYFUCKINGGOD THERE’S A FUCKING DINOSAUR WHERE YOUR KIDNEY USED TO BE!!

here is an example of how i blogged post-nervous breakdown. sad.

i feel like people are tired of me and my stupid stories so i made a point to just stop writing them down or remembering them altogether, i think it’s just a phase.

i’m just hyper-focused on my health right now and blogging every single thing some french stranger yelled at me on christmas eve seems inconsequential.

one good thing about funks is you come up with some good one-liner emo quotes, here’s one i’ve said over and over in my head since all this nausea pain began I’M NOT GOING TO LIVE VERY LONG AND YES I AM AFRAID TO DIE. now pretend you read that in rolling stone and it’s printed over a picture of me in a field holding flowers and a milk jug or something. see? gold i tell you.

happy new year.