before i get with the photos from last nite, here i give you my hangover/sober day items.

the chocolate bars are for fil, and those gummi cokes are fat free. you need sugar on sober day so as to not strangle each other and have fights where all you are saying is what? whatever. huh? whatever.

i love tutti frutti, there was this hipster couple with a tiny puppy outside, i had to choose petting it or going in to buy candy following behind this woman with a huge stroller, all she did was go in, get stuck (tiny store), turn around austin powers style, wait for me to move then left.

THIS TASTES LIKE DREAMS AND LAUGHING i half ran home to bust it open, it was this or cream soda flavour or boring old root beer – choosing wildberry is probably the smartest thing i have done lately.

me: i got us an assortment of foods for sober nite
well candy
and pop
i didnt get shawarma
but i got fanta wildberry
it tastes like dreams and laughing
when i have dehydration drunk dreams and i am scaling a mountain for a glass of refreshment
FANTA WILDBERRY IS IT
you will explode when you try it
alright fine

me: i rented georgia rule too

Phil: dreams and laughing
haha
what did you eat

me: nothing

Phil: what’s that in the bag next to the banana

me: fat free gummi cokes

Phil: oh nice
it looks like prunes or something

the espresso is just cos we are out even though it is SO fil’s turn to buy it, this for me makes it 3 times in a row now!

when you pour it and it fizzes it is like technicolour fuscia purple pink foam magic i am cured.

this is how last nite ended, there is fluff on the dutch crunch cos they slept on the floor and somehow i lost 4lbs over nite. we walked to the communist daughter and had a pre-drink there i had to whizz then it started raining balls, had i not demanded to stop we would have been caught and drenched and i would have been bitchy all night long and despite that fil was not thanking me enough at all.

and ps. what is with the talented mr. ripley hats these days? and haha i just google image searched talented mr. ripley to find a picture of jude law and a hat picture linked to this site.

Borsalino Panama Porkpie

it’s nice to know that everyone rents villas in san remo all of a sudden and listen to hot jazz bands at 3am. dinks.

+++

quote of the day:

“I met a guy named Champion today. He looked in every reflective surface he went by. He has a perm.”

from etienne.

i like how in gmail when i go to write a subject title beginning with H i am usually going for a ha or HAHA or hahahahha and there are fifty different versions of it like whoever is on the receiving end of my emails is like oh heads up i am about to laugh.

don’t get me started on the different variations of !!!!!

i need an outisde opinion, was this up there funny or is it just me? maybe you need to come over and stand beside me when i start a new email and then see how ridiculously long my drop-down menu is for email subject.

johnny depp was supposed to show up last nite.

i drank a thousand champagnes i am pregnant with it right now i must depart and find coffee then i will be back to coast off my drunk still fumes with you.

i just saw that NERD and timbaland video/song and started laughing hysterically how fucking stupid is that song! but i love it! what’s it called i need to psychoanalzye the lyrics and images BRB! it goes: black girls, give it up. white girls, give it up. spanish girls, give it up.

what happened to trying???

+++

PANCAKEMEOW.COM!!!!!

there is even a scent menu. lots of things are out of stock unfortunately but you can request re-stock. swooning on the floor laughing. SOFL.

ARE YOU READY FOR YOUR FUCKING HEAD EYES HEART STOMACH SOUL TO EXPLODE????!!!!

i

give

you

…

!

!!!

!! !!

!!!

omg

HOT DOG PIZZA!!!!!!

refresh to comment if link isn’t showing.

yesterday we had a little online gchat tiff so fil had to “fix it” by bringing home dinner sigh.

these things are good but for the rest of the nite i can taste them in my mouth then start thinking i am food poisoned lying in bed awake while fil saws logs and everytime i have terrible sleep, fil wakes up saying BEST SLEEP EVER wtf.

prosciutto is my lover.

i didn’t even ask for wine!

cid um, has a thing for belts.

i brought out my unused bluetooth (behind me) cos i decided for halloween either me or fil are going as a douchebag.

try ‘em just don’t over do it.

here is my futures bakery story and firstly this is what someone on toronto.com has to say about it:

A staple with the young, urban and artsy folk, Future Bakery is a popular destination with the university crowd. Boasting an always packed patio in the summer, Future’s provides a creative atmosphere for couples, friends and family to share coffee, breakfast, lunch, dinner or desserts.

to which i say a barf on your house!

now i am not going to be doing any apologizing about not “getting it” regarding futures, it is in no way a staple for this guy right here, call me crazy but i don’t see the “big deal” about the manic cafeteria-style atmosphere bursting at this haunt’s seams oh HOW FUN it’s just like a hospital cafeteria.

wrong, not fun.

and when you sit yourself on the patio everone around you is eating cheesecake?

isn’t that meant for alone my life is meaningless depression time?

fil and i rolled up a couple months ago and waited on the patio for ten minutes, so i go to the waitress hey can i grab a couple menus HINT HINT WE ARE ON THE PATIO SERVE US she like yeah yeahs half acknowledges me so i lean over and grab them myself, could have done it ten minutes ago but then we would be ignored with menus and i would have to get up again. so i quip in my i am really nice you like voice we are sitting right over there and even helped with pointing. so we are looking at menus and everything looks shitty we don’t want a fucking gateau (french for cake you yanks) to eat.

so we waited five more minutes and nothing happened except for eavesdropping on the lamest conversations ever with chicks mawing down spoonfuls of cake.

BARF?

BARF!

we left and ate at the victory instead and have never been back to futures and WILL NEVER go back.

it’s funny where it is situated dudes hang on the patio all day checking for babes walking by then they go home and write missed connections about them. if i was single and got a from futures bakery missed connection that would be a total red flag.

wendi’s vfest pictures

this is what my response to the killers is/are well mostly b. flowers.

peep my wicked volleyball skills when hundreds of allergic to fun hipsters’s eyes’s are on you.

action shot for the sports page check fil’s 90 degree angle doing nothing back.

when i was done i blasted it over the fence to the regular folk and this girl caught and deflated it and put it in her bag, no thank you either, just thought it fell from the sky i was like scuse me i got a massive head rush blowing that up and possibly hpv too.

i dunno if you heard but these days i am into smiling.

i am not kidding fil found one of cid’s hairs on his arm then got drunk sentimental and gave himself butterfly kisses with it.

le breakfast.

i was in their video. BRAG ALERT and they read my blog too.

vagina game.

lindsay was eating this sub so i asked to borrow it a second for my art happening.

haloscan is wonky, refresh to make comments link appear.

vfest bush.

more vfest bush.

i have cramps and i feel like a house and i am starving so much i can see through time and this drunk frat guy threw a pile of grass at his friend in the crowd during blonde redhead and it got all over this chick instead and he wouldn’t even help her get it out of her hair so i (total hero) did and said that that was super fucking rude she was all alone insecure and like too shy to be seen picking grass out of her dreads and no not white person dreads there is no way i would have helped if it was a white kid i would be too busy choking on laughing.

i had to check my EMPTY backpack because apparently you are not allowed to have one in vip area meanwhile i saw severals with theirs. anger!

three dollars each x all those. i tipped a buck extra just in case they wanted to go through the nothing that was inside of my bag.

the colonel sanderser yawwwwwwn.

emily haines’s butt yawnnnnnnnnnnnn.

bigger than my backpack.

oh look more wellingtons how very dear yes wendi i know you were wearing some too. i overheard one chick say to her friend please if you see a puddle you HAVE to take my picture beside it and her wellies were like rainbow barf designed desperate.

would you twister with strangers? NO! i won’t even THINK about strangers!!

baw rah nuh nanana wah na nuh nuh baw RA RA na na!

look at how my glasses ARE gillian’s hair.

little girl cigarettes.

exploded virgin bean bag.

tiffany really likes me, she kept saying so. i like it when girls come out and say that, i think chicks are always expecting to hate me then we party and they are like i will fucking have sex with you until forever! JUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSST SAAAAAAAAYYYYYIIIIING

LUUUUUUUUUHOOOOOOSERS!

PMS HEAVEN over there, why don’t you sit with us raymi and phil? uh no thanks haha.

then they put their hands in each other’s back pockets.

i got to go backstage for some of editors, fil didn’t, and so here we have the requisite suck attack.