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and now it’s time for fun with organic bananas

i bought these assholes last friday afternoon, i took these pictures yesterday, wednesday, AND WHY ARE MY BANANAS STILL GREEN!? i figured fine we are going away for the weekend they’ll be ripe by monday at the latest. wrong.

why is my banana raining?

i didn’t know bananas spooged, this shit is sticky as hell, like sap and i cannot even peel this thing either isn’t that the whole idea behind bananas, their god-given purpose? useless.

so i had to crack it in half to open it, more spooge, and it’s dry and hard and not at all delicious looking. if you try to crack a “normal” banana it explodes goop everywhere.

even under normal circumstances bananas make me heave if i think about what i’m chewing on for too long but this is just insane.

took forever to get the sticky off my fingers.


this is tonite. go to it. i am.

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