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ok maybe some of you are jonesing for my little bitchy this is what happened and these are all my insane perspectives on it anecdotes, so here is one, i will try and draw it out as long as possible, just for you.

so i was with my mom on monday, dentist day, and afterward we were tooling through oakvegas, she was lagging mental taking a thousand pictures of every store dog and car and i was getting supes annoyed anyway so i am walking to the second cup on the corner of lakeshore and navy and i can see two beasts of women and a little kid coming along navy also headed in the direction of second cup and i can tell by the pace of my stride that we are going to arrive at the door at the same time pretty much EXCEPT i will be there one foot quicker THEREFORE i have right of way and no i do not grant after yous to bitches with kids just cos they have a kid in tow, sorry, that kid has to start learning now that life isn’t fair and all that, also, hello, kids, hate em*!

ok so i get there and the lady gets there too but i am there first and at least am aware of this lady and the other one and the kid but she is like marching right on in oblivious to me so i cock-block her with my left foot/pointy toe and slip in before her (i won!) and she says oh sorry and means it, but then has an internal bipolar meltdown in her head when she realises she’s been punked by a younger not fat straight-haired tall arrogant young lady (me) and so as i am waiting in line to order she stands right beside me in my comfort zone full on trying a mexican oh you went there stand-off, and i would not grant her the satisfaction of acknowledgement at all (BURN) not once as she was breathing down my neck did i even act like a crazy big-haired hippopotamus was anywhere near me and the funny thing is, second cup did not even offer what i wanted (iced coffee) so i hmmed and hawed a few seconds longer to waste everyone’s time (passive aggression is cool) then gave some ‘tude and left and my mom was all what the fuck was that about you were really bitchy to that guy, then i told her the mental anguish of the last 3 minutes i had just suffered, the end.

*i will clarify, i do not hate them all, just the ugly ones.

+++ haha?

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