FOUR YEARS AGO TODAY

i will pay someone four dollars if they come over and clean up my room, do my laundry, do my hair, tell me i’m pretty and then get me some soda.

i have these Ferrous Gluconate iron pills but i haven’t been taking them consistently enough so on the days i remember i take a handful and then everything gets all weird.

i wore a t-shirt dress yesterday. this bigass white thing i got from art system and i wore long johns and my barbarella boots and i walked in slow motion through the snow all the way to the supermarket whereupon i bought blackberries and hair-dye and greek salad.

i put lipstick all over my body at my place of employment last nite after a few beers and i got it all over the place and i tried to wipe it off but it still says cocktease and cunt and bitch on my arms and legs. i am deliberating whether or not i should post the pictures.

maybe i will.

i told my roommates to drink all the milk while i was away and they didn’t so we have two rancid bags of 2 per cent just sitting there. i think i might throw one over the backyard fence into the alley.

Let’s play strip poker and both lose!

i just nominted myself for the weblog awards but only for best canadian blog cos you guys are all missing a chromosome or two so i made it simple anyway this web award is a bigger deal than the other one i am too exhausted from being the best all the time so you go vote and track it yourselves if you give a shit if you don’t then i don’t give a shit about you either and well, get ready for 2007 to be my most bitterest year in blogging yet.

and the shirt strikes back

remind me i have a story to tell you about fil and some other guy i cheated on this other guy with who i basically got to come out of the closet to me two nites ago. ok there i just told you the story anyway he did everything short of getting down on his knees and blowing fil at mod club. awesome. fil has this ability to make drunk gays lose their fucking minds it’s sweet.

i put it all over some merchandise cos i am an entrepreneur.

my brightest diamond

my brightest diamond / pedestrian from last week here you go.

i dont know if anyone has ever suggested this to you, but you should be the story teller at the library in the kids section when they have story hour. i dont have kids, but if i did and you were the story teller i would insist they go.
allie | Homepage | 11.18.06 – 4:25 am | #

Heres to you Raymi, may god bless you to boog forever and ever amen
bsg | Homepage | 11.17.06 – 11:08 pm | #

are you scared?

me: try and copy this
oh njevermind
i got it
phew

merkley???: quit writing like bjork

me: HAHAA
njevermind

merkley???: hja hja hja

me: AHHAHAHHA
HAHHHHHHHH
HAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAH
AHHAHAHAHHA
dude u just gave me my next blog post

merkley???: what else is new
njew

me: what do we want to eat for dinner

Phil: i am full of rice cakes and peanut butter
i could bring some more of that home
oh
wait
oh nevermind
you are hungry now i guess
i want to eat at RED room and have their singapore vermicelli mmmmmmmm sooooo good and it is right there next to the el mo

me: is that where hot one is tonite?

Phil: yes ma’am

me: what time is the show

Phil: i dunno but i think emm said last night something about hot one actually going on at 10:30
we could eat at red, then walk around kensington and grab a drink somewhere else before show

me: i cant wait that long to eat
ok

Phil: i know but i just ate so maybe you should find something light to eat
to tide you over

me: pistachios

Phil: will that be substantial enough?
more hoodia?

me: another hoodia
aw its sweet that you are so supportive of my eating disorder
swoon

Phil: im here for you baby

puking choir girl