this picture breaks my mother fucking heart.

today is going to be a long day and it’s at the borderline cut-off point as to whether or not i will be showered and clean for it so i have to decide now. i didn’t shower yesterday so maybe i should today. this is all very important information i know, that’s why i am sharing it with you.

noel got me some teeth off ebay cos he wanted to have more teeth in his mouth he said. they’re not real though. in exchange i gave him one of my japanese baked goods erasers and he thought when he first saw it that it was a bone segment, the loaf of bread.

i can’t wait ’til my hair is long again.

we went to play megatouch and drink beers last nite cos i was going crazy shut-in styles and fil was being moody so we went to our locale and one guy who works there said my beastie boys performance was “seriously off the hook” and i was glad cos i remember trying to be as obnoxious and embarassing as possible to somewhat bar myself from going back there – turns out people are all about that behaviour. nice!

THIS IS PRETTY MUCH WHAT MY REAL LIFE IS LIKE.

raymi says:

i would vote for him

Napa Valley Speedball says:

cause you are as batshit as he is, you just have a home and clothes

Napa Valley Speedball says:

hahahahahahahahaah

raymi says:

uh

raymi says:

why are black people fucking insane

raymi says:

i figure you might know the answer to that

Napa Valley Speedball says:

why do white people smell like hamburger?

Napa Valley Speedball says:

i figure you might know the answer to that

raymi says:

why do africans have machetes why cant they use flowers?

Napa Valley Speedball says:

why do white people walk like this “dee dee doo doo dink din”?

raymi says:

AHAHAHHAHHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

raymi says:

why do black people throw spears?

raymi says:

is this conversation too racist to put on my blog

Napa Valley Speedball says:

no

raymi says:

ok

jesus dressup

tony pierce back in hollywood says:

sorry i can’t go to your party

raymi says:

i might not be having one

tony pierce back in hollywood says:

you have an ad on your blog saying you will

raymi says:

read it again

raymi says:

and then read underneath it jees

raymi says:

look at the date

raymi says:

yes i am going back in time to the year 2003 to have my 20th bday party

that’s the flier i made for what was going to be my 20th bday party. it’s funny cos i actually DID have a nervous breakdown. no wait, that wasn’t funny, that SUCKED.

think like anne heche crazy on someone’s property babbling about UFOs.

it feels like a thursday but it is wednesday. the underwear i am wearing makes my ass itch and i avoid wearing it cos of this but it looks pretty when i wear it so i don’t know what to do.

to raymi from phil:

that’s funny

except the part about christian slater being your boyfriend – it made me jealous when you said ‘go for it dude’

does this mean that good looking guys can get away with a quick grab and feel?

i think you mean ‘respective’ jail cells

to phil from raymi:

respective got it

i was being funny

and after i said we are not going to be boyfriends and girlfriends

what are we going to do tonite

i’m sorry my imaginary conversation with christian slater made you jealous

good looking people are allowed to do anything they want remember that woman who had sex with that 13 year old and they said she is too pretty to go to jail

i was just thinking about how one day i will probably be charged with sexual harassment by one of my lady friends cos i’m all hey are those real or is your bra stuffed and instead of waiting for a reply i find out the answer with my hands a la christian slater.

maybe he should be my next boyfriend? i bet he would go for me cos he’d be all grabbing at me and i’d be like GO FOR IT DUDE. well maybe we could just be friends and talk about having zero boundaries while we are sharing some peppered beef jerky in our respective jail cells.

poor dudes, women get away with everything. when a woman is fondled by a woman they are all giggly and flattered and coo at you but then when a guy does it and say he is not very good looking it’s like terrifying and the women fills up with so much fucking rage that she puts her purse strap around his neck and pulls it tight like a noose and strangles him on the spot.

girl, giggle.

guy, DESTROY.