i am drinking beer and coffee at the same time and i am trying to decide which will make me puke first. the beer bottle is hidden on the other side of my laptop. heh. now i have to piss but i’ll sit here a few sentences longer to show my bladder who is really boss. and i just smoked a j and i kept the roach and said to myself you will be happy one day in the not so distant future that you saved this little guy. my dad built a little stone dungeon for the iraqi golden ants that are colinating in my backyard those assholes built a house thing and totally enveloped ate the fuck out of our stone planter. they are also being drowned right now from the sprinkler.

sprinkle. heh. ok i’m gonna pisser now.

hi im back and i have a new hobby it is ripping out my pussy hairs, in-grown or not with my fingers and making interesting hackjob patterns and leaving bold patches.

i am kind of hung-over and in another world.

once i start getting fucked-up i can’t really stop until i go to bed a hundred hours later or am subdued by television or fucking.

will hockey ever be over holy damn.

beercoffee mmm.

on the spot haiku:

la la la la la

i am kind of retarded

smoking camel lights

that is the blythe doll from kristinsteve and it completes me and i have already taken off her clothes and broke the sunglasses and braided her hair and put it in weird ‘dos and i let them keep the box and i fell asleep with her in my right hand because i am ten years old. i haven’t done the whole copycat blythe pictures yet but i will. don’t worry.

my new shooses.

this girl is the size of my thumb and she has a backwards hat and sometimes glasses and made me feel not badly about not knowing how to talk to people when we met but now i talk more and i promise i will be more fun next time and i will do more than sit sideways and talk out of my left ear. at least jamie was there to make it more socially awkward.

jamie rules too because he let me stay at his place on his couch and even offered me to sleep in his bed because i was lonerly and messed up and we just got waaaasted and told stupid dumb stuff to each other and destroyed these candles at the looks like a brothel bar.

my pink palace + subterrane + get your oj + lobeline

i haven’t cried like i cried last nite in the longest time ever. i couldn’t breathe at points and my mascara ran all the way down to my chin. i can’t take this garbage anymore so i’ve decided i’m just not going to get angry about things anymore or hurt or be affected at all, in anyway. i put myself too out there. spineless the minx. yerrr.

this terribly pathetic dancer of a woman was doing this suppose to be sexy number for her friend and it was his bday and it was fun watching her try and try they were sitting right beside me and angelo like she was practically in my lap and her vagina on my forehead.

watching all women dance is great. i don’t get up and shake it with them anymore kuz no one i know likes dancing and im not really friends with the others so it would just be weird if i am like woooh lets go shake it and i do dance contests and other nonsense to this person who i don’t really know and probably doesn’t like me anyway so i end up sitting there paranoid my boyfriend is making out with someone across the room and i just mutter crap to myself, funny jokes and images of things that come to me and i dream about having a bunch of crumpled up bills in my pocket so i can sit there longer drinking and drinking and wish someone comes up and is all ya baby lets make it and i can say sorry i just came here to drink and be one hundred per cent serious.

and im too awkward and dirty old man styles to be near anyone of the same sex it’s like partying with your uncle peter.

i’m glad i saw seana yesterday she is looking good i wish i could have talked to her more. she is like nice sweater yer patented stripes.

i am a stripe.

i pee’d beside a dumpster in an alley and also by this guy’s benz and put my hand on his bumper to steady myself and not urinate into my purse.

tonite at midnite is anti‘s birthday. he will be 25. his body is all messed up mega-wise by which i mean in serious mysterious pain. what’s the deal with that? when i am in pain i think well i am obviously dying and it means i have chronic gayness disorder.

jamie rules for the nifty banner.

yah yell at me some more i love it.

hung with parkdalemassive and parkdalemiddleton today and also last nite and i finally saw how much of a scarey loser i was on the tapes. filmed more. went to magic pony on queen (785 queen st. w)and saw’re kristn and steve and they gave me the blythe doll because they are amazing and i also bought a bunch of other junk. white people selling jap crap back to the japs is funny and good. we ate at la hacienda and i was rude out loud and called noel an old man and this other guy made a angry face when i said that and raymi was bragging about her new temperament and craig has a growndup girlfriend now and we made a new friend who is on crazy anti-psychotics that i was also on a while back and he sat cross-legged and grabbed noel and craig just stood there laughing and i hid in the bathroom. kristin is all it’s weird and cool that you guys are hanging out again like old times. im going to move out soon. things are getting weird real fast and i am not digging it anymore.

wicka wicka wicka.

and i bought the greatest old man shoes adidas tobacco colour and also a shirt i didn’t really try on properly but it was only 22 bucks so pshhhh.

breath on me britney spears holyfak speaking of which:

when does the post office close? whatever it is friday. things are open later friday. and they should be. i have to ship some junk (literally) to bojangles for his 25th (ancient. dusty. dinosaur. cobwebby.) scurred day on monday june 7 (ak!). scurd-of-it-going-to-suck-day. john you rock ‘em ’til the cops bust in and hug you like a monster. definitely.

i think there is a purty tonite or somewhere going outsville we will see. i’m gonna meet mum.

knock knock

who’s there

interrupting cow.

inte-?

MOO!

this one is for my brother. man it’s bad.