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at about 3 o’clock today after getting outta my thare-ape-ist session
i was attacked with all these sharp ouchy pains
and i still had to wait around to give blud (i’m iron deficient)
so we sign me up to give blud
and i sweat it out in the loo
fetal-like (seriously) in the handicapped stall
i felt so ill so weak so pale
a nurse came in and thought i mite be a patient of sorts
and gave me a funny look under the stall
“are you sure yer ok?”
“YESSSS” i screamed
i feel bad about screaming now
but at the time
you’da dun the same
so then i still have to give blud
and we’re waiting and waiting
and then my name is called
and i tell nurse i am on my rag and very weak and in extreme pain and i’ve gobbled a hundred pills (advil/tylenol/aspirin)
and i apologized in advance in case i mite throw up all over her
and i kept fidgetting
and i think she just thought i was nervous about the needle
and didn’t clue in that my fidgettyness was completely unrelated to the needle and keeps saying, “it’s gunna be alrite it won’t hurt at all.”
so she gives me this lil butterfly needle for babies becuz i have ultra-tiny veins
and i look over to my left and everyone in the waiting area is staring at me bob my head back and forth and clutching my belly and screaming and moaning and they’re just fukkin st ar in g at me becuz the curtain is not even drawn
all the way home in the car i’m in a ball in the backseat screaming and screaming for my dad to drive faster
“drugs DR U G S DRuuuuugs more DRUGS!!!!!!!”
then i get home and get heating pad (electric blanket)
my brutha walked in the room to steal some change off my dresser and was like,
“woah, this is just like that scene in trainspotting where the guy’s comin’ down frum junk and he’s all sweaty and rolling around in his bed…..”


i think that was the best analogy my brother’s ever made in his entire life. gud for him.

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