Today wuz horrible. Raymi lost her hat AND wuz set up wif a creep frum the net. Never Agen. i knew straight away, even while i wuz walking towards him that he wuz mister SO WRONG for me. He’s not a smoker so i made a point to ChaiNsmoke even tho’ i had aN empty stumak and felt dizzy doing so. I ordered a French Onion Soup wif extra Garlik cuz i knew he wanted to waggle his tongue ’round in my mouth. eww. He kept trying to puT his arm around me and went, ‘Ahem’ then moved in a lil bit kloser to me. He’s probably reading this rite now and is planning a way to track me down so i think i’m gunna go back and edit out sum of the extreme personal info ie, the town, city and CuntRee that i live in. My apologies for any discrepEncies.

I tried to hook up wif a sumwun to have sex with to get my mind off the netFreeK but he wuz bizzy so then i went to the mall to look for a new teddybear to try and make me feeL better but kood find Nada. I tramped around the throngs of xMas shoppers feeling sorry for myself and krying when i bumped into this family i use to babysit for and always thought me to be ‘perfect’ with no ‘emotionally eFFed-up glitches’ so i sed that the bitter wind made my eyes tear-over and theN i knew i wuz gunna lose it wunce this lady knocked into me wif her bags so i took off.

I’ve finally given in to tacO HeLL.

I’ve reached that ultimate Low. alrite alrite, i’ve always been here, but i’ve finally Admitted to it.

This wuz taken in Oxford. If you can see thru the swarms of the faggy tourists there’s a cluster of squatting girls. why they’re there is kuz we had thrown this raggeddy wallet full of receipts and 1 pence coins on the grownd and sat ‘cross the street to take pictures of all the scavengers. this one girl was so annoyed that there wasn’t any money in the wallet she got up and slammed it into that nearby garbage can. I fished it out, crowched down to make as if i were tying my velcro shoes and left the wallet there. the fifth time ’round, a man and woman ran to the wallet, the man yanked it up and shoved it in his pocket and they ran like fukk. we followed them down all these back streets and markets until they were just gone. the fucked thing was, these two arab guys were following us kuz they must’ve thought we were stupid tourists who kept on dropping their wallets. By this time we had gotten bored with the game so we hopped a doubledecker back to SummerTown leaving the Arabs safely behind.

Our fanastiK hero’s mugshot frum her TubePass. Whudda Glamour Shot. the photoBoothes o’re there are wicked! This chik wif her brit accent sez over the speaker,
“Now, you realize that if you are not satisfied with your foto graff, you can select NO and start again.”

Laura, wait wait wait! you and yer old man broke up?!

After one nite of partAying and boozin’ it up in Sutton (London) at this PubbyKlub called ‘the Litten Tree’ I had to Krash at my frend’s, cuzin’s howse and had to sleep in this bunkbed. This shot is actually very generous in making the bed appear to be bigger than what it actually is. I was drunk as a fiddler’s bitch and not even halfway thru’ a dose of E and i had to smush myself into the bottom bunk. I scratched my face and arms everytime i rolled-over frum the bedsprings sticking outta the top mattress during the nite. it was complete drunken and eFFed up HeLL. I didn’t trust taking the topbunk cuz i knew wif my luck I’d roll off during the nite and die. when i’m sober i sleep like a rock. When i’m drunk i kick and toss and talk in my sleep.

Maybe i’m a witch.

Laura, the blog posts go in order uv first to last posted in a day, so u just gotta scroll down. Like in the Forum, silly. And uv course people would read yer postings. They’re so interesting and make me all…uhm, excited. yes. this is true.

Here’s me (raymi) in Oxford. that siGn between my krotch sez, ‘please keep off grass’ or something and there i am On the grass like the eFFing rebellious bitch i’ve always been. hyuk hyuk. The tour company gave out these horrible bag lunches whenever we went out. I think i had this mango brie rye samwich and a box of juice and a flake. after this shot my frend pushed me down on the grass and made my lunch get smushed. Raymi wuz mad cuz raymi was very hungry that day and tired and Raymi needed her hangovir meal. lookit how pale Raymi wuz. that’s kuz the sun nver shined and when it did, Raymi was indoors, sleeping.

That guy had a girlfrend back home. This shot was taken at that howse party of these yanks in LondOn(uk). He was a real smart guy. I read one of his postcards home to hiz gurl. it red, “I’ve made many new frendz. don’t worry, none of them are girls.”