sharpie had to translate what this text meant to samir.

salmon fillet.

sharpie email me that booze delivery number so next time we are prepared thank you from now on i will only write you emails from my blog.

i am very tired in this picture, this is at dinner with leslie the first nite in after a long drive.

american tim horton’s right after we crossed the border.

garden vegetable on cheese croissant, they couldn’t toast it i said are you sure you can’t just throw it in that bagel factory she said it would set on fire dear american tim horton’s, change your bagel toaster settings to NOT ON FIRE.

i didn’t even bother to get the stains out of that dress, it has pockets too and when i put my hands in the pockets and walk people float away into dreamland.

leslie had this and got the rest to go which i inhaled some of before bedtime at 4 in the morning and then ate the rest the following afternoon.

fil had general tso’s chicken. we ordered a bottle of wine and barely had two glasses, asked beforehand if we could leave with it out the back door if we couldn’t finish it. score.

i had shrimp with looks like vomit lobstersauce and finished it in two minutes.

oh really are you sure i thought it was the other way around?

well duh why do you figure that’s where dead bodies go?

oh please, i am all ABOUT me-focused duties.

whimsical pillow party.

leslie has great taste.

she let me keep that i hope she doesn’t have second thoughts.

people in america line up in their cars to mail their letters at the post office’s mailbox outside on the sidewalk and the chute faces the road and sticks out at window level wtf it’s called walking! look forward to my obese america post.

it was so hot, i wanted to go swimming, that lake was deserted. fil didn’t bring a bathingsuit and leslie is porcelain-skinned. assholes.

this is where i was going to do stand-up.

and a girl yell-talk barked at me that i had wicked boots.

leslie is allergic to the entire universe she said no tomatoes.

fil’s burger was too rare, he sent it back for more cooking. he said it sucked.

from what? oh you are being cute i get it.

i told leslie to buy that to scare fil but i spoiled the surprise by telling him there was a surpise outside, i was worried it would be too effective as he was very fragile hung that day.

hippie atm directions.

my baby chicken burrito.

it was pretty good, you don’t have to tell them what you want in it, that’s one annoying thing about new-wave fusion restaurants where there are fifty different variations to one simple thing. i am hungry, make up my mind for me, thank you.

i saw this first, fil copied me.

this one t-shirt place in town had a wicked bad attitude and because of that i didn’t get a shirt.

opus 40 <3

down in between the walls it was very cold, up above it was very hot.

here i am asking fil why he is being a bitch cos i was waiting for him to walk with me through the labyrinth part for the first time (the guy who built it was killed by his own creation so it’s a bit eerie-feeling) i called his name he answered but didn’t appear, then i called again louder and he didn’t come then i screamed his name i thought he didn’t hear me he appears and is like WHAT!? i said hello i asked you to come with me five minutes ago why are you being a bitch then he asked why i was being a bitch etc. do you get crabby with your bf/gf on vacations sometimes? anyway i got over it and explored the rest by myself.

paris hilton?